As i walk , I feel the wind blowing in my face , the sun that is setting down is casting long dark shadows behind every single object that blocks its way . Remembering the past is never my favourite thing to do , but today , i feel a little downbeat . Its the first month i've gone through after the , ... 'breakup.' Things are getting better , ...but today is the 30th day , you've got to cut me some slack . 

 

 

Passing by the hallway , ...i remembered ...

 

 

"Junggie-ah ! ~" he whispered right behind my ears .

 

"Yes Taemin-ya ?<3" i answered . 

 

"Meet you after school at the gate , ya ? I'm walking you home today !" he said and gave me a peck on the cheeks . 

 

I blushed .

 

... its the first time hes walking me home . 

 

"Wae Taem-" 

 

"TAEMINNNNIEEEEEEE OPPPPAAAAAAA<3" and she hugged Taemin from behind . MY TAEMIN . FROM BEHIND . DAMN IT . 

 

"Sulli what are you doing ! Cant you see i'm talking to HyunJung here ?" he said while Sulli choke cling to Taemin's arm . 

 

"Oppa ! We are going on a date after school right ? Did you forget ?" she said in a fake high pitch voice . 

 

"Oh no ! We are !" 

 

and there goes my walk home . He will go on the 'date' of course , and not send me home . I hate Taemi-

 

"But i'm sending my Junggie-ya , so i cant . Its not a date Sulli , you offered to buy me a Banana Milk ." 

 

"Bu-" 

 

"No Sulli , i can buy the milk on my own . Thanks ." 

 

...did i tell you how much i love Taemin ? hehe . 

 

 

unshed tears formed in my eyes , a knife stabbed my heart , ...deep . 

 

and now , ...pass the canteen ...

 

 

"Are you dating Kyuhyun , Junggie ?"

 

"Uh ? Um , no ." 

 

"But you're always sitting with him during Break ." 

 

"Hes my best guyfriend , Taemin-ya . We've reached a level that ...being in a relationship doesnt fit ." 

 

"Oh , ...i dont want to reach that level ." 

 

"...wae ?" 

 

Is that hope i hear ? I've always loved Taemin . 

 

"I'm going back to class ." 

 

"Um , alright Taemin-ya ." 

 

I thought that he would finally confess . 

 

 

 

I clutched my books closer  to my chest as i walk pass the Car Porch . Why must it rain today ? 

 

 

 

"Junggie-ya ! You dont have an umbrella ?" 

 

"Um , no ." 

 

"Come , i'll send you home with mine ! ^^" 

 

"Thats ...very nice of you , Taemin-ya . But , ..." 

 

"Ah , dont worry ! Nobody will see us . Its raining cats and dogs right now . Dont worry , your potential boyfriend wont run away ! Why are you so worried?-"  

 

"Tae- ," 

 

"Haha thats so adorable you know ! But its raining ! Nobody will see us ! We can just deny if anybody asks tho , so dont worry alright ! I'm just-" 

 

"Tae-," 

 

"sending you home ! I'll worry if you got s-" 

 

"YAH LEE TAEMIN !!"

 

"ah , mianh . you were saying ?" 

 

wait . Did he say he'll be worried if i got sick ...? Yah HyunJung-ah , sucha pabo ! shouldnt have stop him just now ! 

 

"Jung ?" 

 

"ah , Taemin-ya . Your umbrella ...is too small ." 

 

" Yahh , ...mianh . i forgot ." 

 

"Haha , its okay , you can go home first ! ^^" 

 

"Aish , ...you dont have to be so happy all the time you know . Kay , i'm off ." 

 

Dont have to be so happy all the time ...? No Taem , ...you dont understand . 

 

 

 

I'm unhappy , but i always have to be happy . Because alot of people depend on me . I'm a source of their happiness . I didnt realize i've reached the Ending ; ...the school gate . 

 

 

"I think you misunderstood me . Youre just like a sister of mine . I treated you nicely , because youre like a sister of mine . Please , go and find someone better . At one time , i did like you . But now , no . Go get someone better ." 

 

with that , Taemin left me . He left me crying alone outside the gate . And it was raining , but i didnt care . My heart is ripped into small pieces . My chest hurts . Its so hard to breathe . 

 

Lee Taemin left me . 

 

 

 

"HyunJung yeobo ! What are you doing out here in the rain ! I told you to wait inside , i'll pick you up !" 

 

huh ? Oh . Him . 

 

"...sorry Nichkhun-ah ." 

 

"What is that ? No yeobo ! I told you to call me Khunnie yeobo , right ?" 

 

"...Khunnie yeobo ." 

 

"Aish , its okay . You can take your time to love me , no rush alright ? Just know that i'll be here if you need me . Saranghae HyunJung Yeobo !" and he kissed my cheeks . 

 

...No blush . 

 

"...saranghae ..." 

 

Taemin-ah . 

 

"Yeobo , are you alright?"

 

No . I'm breaking . I cant take this anymore . I'm not alright ! I'M NOT ALRIGHTTTT !  

 

"Ne , i'm fine , ...yeobo ." 

 

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A/N : i'm always so emo all the time right ? gosh .