I looked at her from far away as I watched her all these time. Her laugh, her smile used to be for me but now it’s for another. I was a fool to let her go and a monster to hurt her when I did. I’ve realized it too late that I’m in love with her and needed her to be in my life. But that is now long gone as she had move on with her life and found somebody that she deserves and makes her happy. All the pain that I’ve given her in the past, I had deserved it when she left. Heartbroken and filled with sadness, she ran towards the one person that I did not expect as they were never close in the first place. Eventually they became friends which I did not mind at all as I was still didn’t realize my feelings towards her. But it all changed when I saw them together at the park laughing and cuddling each other. It was her laugh and happy eyes that gave away the change in her as she had lost it when she was in love with me. Then something clicked in my mind when I saw them kiss and felt my heart hurts as I had finally realized that she’s not coming back to me and that I had always loved her but took her for granted. I had cried myself to sleep that night wondering the reason why I didn’t realize it sooner.

As time goes on, their relationship grew steady and I try to be happy for her. We still remained as friends but our relationship was not as close as it was before and I guess it was my fault in a way. I tried to date other girls and try to forget about her but I couldn’t. I couldn’t hate the guy that had healed the heart of the girl of my dreams as he is one of my good friends. He had even asked for my permission on whether they could date or not as he still thinks of me as an older brother and a friend to her. I gave my blessings despite the protests of my heart towards it. It should have been me together with her, I’ve always thought to myself when I watched them get together at the apartment I shared with my friends and her boyfriend. But the logic side of me always replied back, it’s your fault for letting her go and hurting her back then and you deserve to feel this way now.

Over the years that I’ve watched her from afar, regretting the choices that I made in the past that have caused this. I knew that he was good to her and vice versa. Then one night it came as shocking news to us all in our apartment. She was smiling and watched him lovingly as he made the announcement that they were engaged and are planning to get married soon. I watched as my other housemates ran to congratulate him and she walked towards me. She smiled at me and asked if I could be the best man as she didn’t have many friends who are girls and Junhyung had a sister whom he wanted to be the maid of honor. I nodded as my answer as she hugged and thanked me for being the friend she needed. I sighed to myself wishing that it would be me that she’s getting married too instead of him. My heart broke even more when she asked me to accompany her to pick her wedding dress as her parents were overseas like usual. I watched her twirl in the dresses as she tries some of the dresses on. She looked gorgeous in all of them and almost scolded me for not helping her to pick it. I laughed as I watched her complained and thought how that it should have been me there meeting her at the end of the wedding march wearing a wedding dress. But alas it would never happen but at least I’ll be able to see her happy in the arms of the man who loves her.

The wedding day has arrived and she looked like an angel in the white sleeveless satin dress and small tiara. She smiled happily as her father gave her away and stood next to my friend before saying their vows to each other. How I wished that it was me in his place but it’s too late to change the past but as long as she is happy and being able to see her smile, I’ll be fine.