Jonghyun's POV


Piercing loud sirens swept through the darkness of the street as the ambulance zoomed past the old beige complex for the second time tonight.

The phone rang throughout the house that sat in complete and utter silence. I sat there on the satiny couch covering my ears. Trying hard to ignore the event outside.

I was too afraid to go see what actually happened. I sat there. Unaware of what to do about the happenings right outside the cracked door. I heard it. Even when I tried to not to. I heard every painful movement of the cars as they collided together.

The bang echoed through the dark streets that  now filled with confused and curious citizens.

Right away I knew. The people who raised me. My so called parents.

The ones who never loved me. The ones who told me how worthless and pathetic I was every day. How I was never going to be good enough for anyone or anything. I'd come home from school only to be smacked across the face for not having good enough grades. Be kicked in the chest for talking to the wrong people. These same people I still managed to call my mom and dad after everything they did to me. Like a lot of other families my parents were rich, successful business people. They owned a large corporation that I was supposed to take over one day. Just like most silly old Korean dramas I refused to be the heir of the company. Spending all my days sitting behind a desk doing inhuman amounts of paperwork. I refuse to be a robot who is treated like they're a king or something. I want to make my father happy, but I don't want to be forced into something I don't like doing. Looks like I might not have a choice now. My parents are gone.


Dead probably.

Never to return to this dinky old complex again. Never to be seen again except in their funeral. Buried deep inside a glassy wooden coffin. Then buried again in the very dirt and soil in which I shake off my shoes almost everyday.

The sounds of the crash were so horrifying. They echoed throughout the block. I knew no one could ever survive something like that. It would be would have to be some form of a freak accident.

Even though I knew my parents didn't love me, I never wanted them to die. Especially like this. I never wanted them to suffer to this extent. Of course I wanted them to feel the same level of pain they put me through. But where would the good be in wishing somebody’s life away? There were no words that can describe what I feel. How I feel. Too many different emotions rushing through my body.

Fear.

Anger.

Sadness.

I was scared. Scratch that, terrified. I couldn’t even think properly, but I knew I needed to get that stupid phone to stop ringing.

I jumped from the couch as the cushions, the ones I had neatly placed around me earlier, flew from my lap and sprawled out across the floor. My footsteps pounded the ground as I dashed to the annoying ring of the phone. The black phone. The one that sat on the wobbly, old coffee table next to the kitchen door frame was closest.

 It had been ringing for only a few seconds, yet it felt like it had been hours. Before that pathetic ring could stop I grabbed the phone. The extremely large, fake diamond earring I wore crashed against the phone as it was brought up to my ear with such rough force. I was breathing heavily. Basically panting. Like a wild dog. Not from running, but from fear and worry.


“Hello?” I panted calmly through the phone.


“Hello this is West Fields Hospital. My name is nurse Jung and I’m very sorry to inform you, but you parents were in a car crash. They were seriously injured in the accident. They died instantly."


“I know.” I whispered into the phone, “ I was there when it happened. It was right outside our house.” I paused for a moment before I burst into tears. I couldn’t help it. I knew they would be seriously injured if not dead, but a part of me wished that they would survive and everything would be alright. Even if they would hate me the rest of my life. I wouldn't care. I just needed someone to be with me. I don't want to be forever alone. I’m guessing that nobody wants to be. Unless you have a legit problem with people. Then I suppose you would want to be alone. Would you really want to be alone all the time though? That would be lonely and who would want to be lonely? I sure as hell don’t want to be.


"Sir, I’m very sorry for your losses. Please be safe and take care.” the kind nurse spoke in a soothing tone, making me feel only the tiniest bit better.


“Ne. Thank you.” I sniffled.


I stared down at the phone in my hand.

Realization.

It consumed me. It was like a bomb went off inside my head. I couldn't think straight. There were too many things running through my mind. I could barely function. I sighed heavily before placing the shiny black phone back on its dock. I wiped the last few tears from my eyes and sniffled once again. I knew I should see my parents one last time, but I just couldn’t do it. All I know is that I need to go some where. The old rusted hinges creaked as I pulled open the door and stepped outside. Darkness engulfed me. The sky was lit with millions of stars that shined brightly through the night. The crescent moon lay between thousands of stars and ignited the world at these late hours. Down below, the few streetlights that actually worked dimly lit the far end of the seemingly endless street. I trudged over to my black Porsche that sat parked at the end of my driveway. It didn't take long for me to realize I couldn’t drive anywhere because the street was locked down from the accident. I paused for a moment. Glancing upwards the scene that lay before me. Long yellow caution tapes zigzagged across the street blocking off the scene from everyone but the police force. Three police cars and two tow trucks sat across from me. My neighbors slowly faded away as if nothing happened.

I guess they all had better things to do. Like move on with their lives. Forget that this incident ever happened. Go back to their perfect little house with their perfect little family and continue living their perfect little life.

I clenched my fists in anger. Stupid, unempathetic human beings. How can they even call themselves human? Empathy is characteristic all people should own. It’s not like you can’t be sympathetic towards someone. I mean if somebody was murdered don’t you think that you would feel bad? Unless you’re like mentally dysfunctional or something and you literally don’t feel remorse for anyone or anything. See I couldn’t be like that. I would be sad if a spider died. Well, I guess that’s not true because those ers are freaky as hell. Their creepy little skinny legs the tickle you when the crawl around your body. Ew. The thought.

I looked back to my parents totally demolished car. My eyes started to water again. Broken glass was scattered everywhere. Their car was flipped upside down on the right side of the road. It was hard to recognize it. I couldn’t even tell that it was a car. I, for once, impressed myself by actually identifying the totaled car. Across the street from the used-to-be car lay the other drivers car.


The other car that single handedly killed both my parents in seconds. Only half as damaged as my parents car.


All the unimaginable and unwanted thoughts running through my mind at once.

I hated it.

I hated the feeling of hatred. Especially towards another human being. I knew that it wasn't all their fault. After all, they were the victim too. Hell, I can't blame anyone because I don't even know exactly what happened. For all I know, it could have been my parents fault. Wouldn’t doubt it honestly. I seem to be the type of person who causes many problems for others. When I say many, trust me, I mean many. And you know what they say. The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. Wait a sec. That’s not right is it. Hmmm…too bad.

I don't even know if the other driver is still alive or not. I hope that he's okay, yet a part of me hopes he suffers just a little. I know it's not right to think like this. I know I shouldn't wish someone to suffer, but how can't I? The only family I had left is dead. Even if they had trouble showing their love for me. They were still my parents nonetheless.

Oh god, I’m really starting to act like my father.

a.k.a. the Devil.


I tried to get my mind off things. But nothing seemed to work. I dragged myself back to my house. Debating if I should leave again or stay.

I was in desperate need for time.

I yearned for peace and quiet. But no. Of course not. Going outside would mean cars, people, obnoxious animals with their even more obnoxious mating calls in the middle of the damned night. I decided to just stay inside. Turning off the TV would leave me with the much needed silence.

After making a final decision on my little plan, I made my way over to the couch. I sighed as I seated myself, finally giving my legs time to relax after all the pacing. I leaned back on the couch. I rested the back of my head on the hard board of the couch with my forearm draped across my face. Distracting my mind with the simplest yet most pointless things possible. I don’t know what to think. I honestly don’t. I mean my parents just died. What the am I supposed to think anyway?  I mean there isn’t much besides the normal sob sayings you say when someone dies.

So there I was, on the couch, tears slowly dripping down my face. I want to say I feel like a loser, but I think I have almost every right to be sad right now.

I couldn’t stand staying like this any longer. First of all it was insanely uncomfortable. Secondly, I was tired. I propped myself up on the arm of the couch.

 After regaining my energy (and vision) I stood up. Taking baby steps, I dragged my self up the flight of stairs. I pushed open my bedroom door and trudged over to my bed. God did that ragged thing look like pure heaven right now.

 I didn’t bother preparing myself for bed. Not nearly enough energy to manage such a challenging task. Instead I planted my body onto the soft mattress. I rolled over closer to the wall and pulled the comforter over my sore body. My puffy, red face stung from the tears that had finally stopped falling.

I was way to out of it right now. My head was spinning. I felt like I was going to go crazy. I knew that in time everything would get better. At some point. Hopefully soon.

It felt amazing to be laying on something other than the rock I called my couch.  Aren’t those things supposed to be comfortable? Well mine wasn’t.

I felt way more relaxed. I let my mind roam freely as I rested my eyes. Losing all bad thoughts of my parents and only remembering the happy moments I spent with them. It was the only other option considering I absolutely could not get them off my mind no matter how hard I tried. Seemingly impossible for anyone I suppose.

I shifted in my bed. The room was quiet for the most part. Everything besides my breathing. Unfortunately I forgot to turn the air conditioning on, so I was abnormally hot. Not that I’m not usually a hot piece of , but anyways.

Darkness filled the entire house. Silence finally consumed the entire street. Nobody was around to pity me, then again, nobody was there to comfort me. For some odd reason I felt at peace. Like I finally got part of what I asked for, but something was missing.

Something important.