flower boy

Boys (Not) Over Flowers

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Roses are red, violets are blue,

Flowers smell good, and so do you.

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Word Count: 3,788

Rated for Language.

Warning: CRACK. CRACK. AND .

Kyungsoo likes flowers.

There’s no need for an explanation of hows and whys.

The way his diamond orbs twinkled with a gleam and his plush lips curved upwards brilliantly in a cordate shaped smile whenever he sees bouquets of flowers ranging from violet orchids to red roses to white lilies –

How lovely.

Do Kyungsoo just loves flowers.

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Kim Jongin is a manly man. Flowers are for girly girls.

It’s out of the blue when Jongin suddenly takes the initiative to actually ask. By all means, Kim Jongin is not oblivious to his favourite hyung’s adoration towards flowers (although sometimes he does question himself – why flowers? They’re so girly and stuff).

He notices the way Kyungsoo’s eyes lit up so brightly when he’s given a bouquet of pink roses from his fans during his birthday. The way Kyungsoo seemed somehow hesitant to give out his red rose during the Dream K-pop Fan Concert. The way Kyungsoo sings a little too happily when he waters his own potted orchid outside the window.

Jongin is all fidgety and red cheeks when he pops out the billionaire question. “Hey, Kyungsoo hyung…”

The doe eyed male perks up slightly at the sound of his name being called. Kyungsoo hums in response, tilting his head to the side while widening his round orbs. “Yes, Jongin ah?”

“H-Hyung..” The tanned male uncharacteristically stutters when Kyungsoo’s attentive eyes are upon him and that cute innocent look he radiates so naturally has Jongin all tongue tied. “Umm..I-I....errr..” THIS IS SO NOT MANLY, Jongin mentally claws his face.

Kyungsoo’s eyes narrow slightly at Jongin (oh no, he’s judging me with that look!) as a concern frown plays across his face. “You’re not feeling well? Do you want to rest? I’ll get you a cup of milk if you can’t sleep.”

I don’t want milk. I want your mil - Jongin gurgles. “N-No. I’m fine, hyung.” He contemplates if he should ask Kyungsoo. Besides, there’s nothing wrong with boys liking flowers right? Flowers are manly man. No, flowers are for girly girls. Ah, it. “Stupid gay flowers.” Jongin mutters off handedly.

“Flowers? Did you say flowers? I love flowers!” Kyungsoo squeaks excitedly, bouncing off from his seat and jumps up right next to Jongin, invading the tanned male’s personal space (not that Jongin minds).

A bead of sweat rolls down from his forehead as Jongin tries to think of a solution out of this. “Er..” Jongin steals a glance at his hyung whose face is brighter than any neon lights. “Yeah, I love them too.” He grits out, smile too wide and too forced.

“Really?” Kyungsoo beams, lacing their hands together like they’re long lost best friends. “Jongin ah, are you for real?” The doe eyed male’s face is that close to Jongin.

The tanned male splutters but grins sheepishly, tightening his hand around Kyungsoo’s smaller ones. “Yes, pretty flowers. Flowers are pretty.” His deep voice sounds so high-pitched but that precious smile Kyungsoo graces him with is worth it.

He starts counting sheeps when Kyungsoo sits on his lap (oh my god, even his is so soft and bouncy can I just and squeeze those cheeks –) and starts talking about his favourite flowers. Jongin nods mindlessly at every single word Kyungsoo says, those cherry lips moving so deliciously and he has to mentally tell his little Jongin to calm (the ) down.

Later at night, Jongin realises he couldn’t sleep (not without relieving himself from his painful hard-on).

And damn, Kyungsoo smells so good, Jongin thinks as he buries his nose into Kyungsoo’s dark locks. He smells so earthly, so natural – like flowers. The next day, Jongin’s manly man pride has gone down the drain when he visits a flower shop to buy Kyungsoo’s favourite flower. He keeps chanting ‘this is for kyungsoo’ again and again like a mantra.

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Scribble. Scribble.

Roses are red, violets are blue

Sehun pauses, tapping the end of the pencil onto his lip, eyebrows scrunching up together. He wants the best of the best for his beloved hyung. Since Kyungsoo loves flowers, why not write a sweet flowery poem for him? The maknae grins, already visualising the cute doe eyed male planting kisses on his cheeks showering Sehun with his love.

A stupid smile appears on Sehun’s stoned face as he’s rained by the images of a flustered and abashed Kyungsoo murmuring his undying love for him. Why yes, hyung. I accept your passionate love for me. Now let us seal our love with a kis –

“Roses are red, violets are blue. Sehun’s feet smells, so bad it can kill you.”

That disgustingly annoying voice. A vein is popping out on the maknae’s forehead as he grunts. “Go away.” Seeing the smug look on the dancer’s face, Sehun scrambles wildly and tries to cover his love poem for Kyungsoo. “Get out, JongOUT.”

Oh hey, that rhymes. Hehe.

Jongin, the EXO troublemaker never fails to irritate anyone and everyone. Said troublemaker whistles as he plops down like a boss on top of Sehun’s desk. “Oh, writing poems eh? I have one for you, maknae. Roses are red, violets are blue –”

Sehun grips the pencil hard, knuckles turning white. Surprisingly, the pencil hasn’t break into half yet but the glare he gives Jongin is enough to last for generations. Gritting his teeth, Sehun hisses out. “Will you just leave me alone –”

“God made Jongin handsome, what happened to you?” Jongin smirks.

Sehun blinks. Then, he finally gets it. The chair nearly flies across the room and out of the window when he chases Jongin with a sharp pencil in his hand (trying to stab an eyeball with the pointy edge).

“ARGH, GET BACK HERE YOU MUTHAFU –”

“SUHO HYUNG, SEHUN’S SAYING BAD WORDS!”

“DON’T INVOLVE YOUR SUGAR DADDY IN THIS –”

Baekhyun yawns loudly, rubbing a hand over his tired eyes as he slowly opens the door. “Hmm, what’s this commotion about?” He groggily mumbles as he sees a tumbling and rolling maknaes ball outside his room that somehow looks like a Sehun and a Jongin clawing each other’s’ faces and tearing out their hair.

“Put the pencil away, Sehun. Jongin, watch the face. I’m going back to sleep, es.” Baekhyun deadpans, slamming the door in both of their faces.

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“You –”

“hh.”

The two maknaes keep rolling on top of each other, spatting saliva onto each other’s faces. They haven’t realised that they have been rolling all the way to the kitchen where Kyungsoo’s haven is.

Sehun is about to stab the pencil into Jongin’s eyeball when an innocent face pops out from behind the counter, eyes wide in a childlike curiosity.

“What’re you two doing?” Innocent doe eyes keep blinking in disbelief.

“…..”

Apparently, the two maknaes are too caught up shamelessly admiring the slender Kyungsoo dressed in a red Pororo apron and a spatula in one hand. The sight is so homely and endearing – Kyungsoo would definitely make a sweet housewife.

“E-Eh, hyung…” Sehun breaks his reverie first, quickly wiping the non-existent drool off his chin. “We’re just –uhh…”

Jongin smacks a palm to Sehun’s face, giggling in an annoying high pitch voice. “We’re just playing a game!” The tanned male squishes Sehun’s face with his fingers, revelling in the grunts. “Roll Like A Buffalo! We’ll be rolling away then!” With that, he kicks Sehun, rolling themselves away.

Kyungsoo stands there, stupefied. A pout juts out of his plush lips as he walks back into the kitchen dejectedly. “I wanted to ask if I could play too..”

His sulky pout is later gone when Chanyeol walks in, looking all like he had just hike a mountain, his face and clothes covered with dirt and some leaves stuck on his tousled dark hair, a wide yet shy grin on his face as he presents Kyungsoo with a handful of daisies. The tall male stutters unintelligently as Kyungsoo’s soft hands brushed his dirtied ones.

A few minutes later, Suho sees the tall rapper stumbling out of the kitchen, bracing himself on the wall as he palms the area where his heart beats rapidly. Suho sees the love-struck and dazed look on Chanyeol’s face, immediately knowing that he has competition.

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“Wait, Kyungsoo – he – what?”

Chanyeol smiles dreamily at his laptop, the screen where Kris’s dismayed face is displayed. The rapper repeats his sentence again. “Kyungsoo kissed me today!” He ends it with a girlish giggle, flapping his hands.

Kris snorts back. “What did you do this time?” The leader of EXO-M raises an eyebrow, crossing his arms in front of his chest. His impassive face is scrunched up, lips frequently twitching once in a while but his inner diva is currently screeching. OH NO, YOU DIDN’T. MY LOVELY KYUNGSOO DID NOT PLACE HIS PRETTY LIPS ON YOUR FULGY MCTROLL DERPYASS FACE.

“I went out and plucked some daisies for him.”

What. “What?”

“I gave Kyungsoo daisies –”

“I know, stupid. And he gave you a kiss for that?” Kris deadpans. ing pansy daisies?! You’ve got to be ing kidding me.

Chanyeol squints his large eyes at the screen and then he guffaws loudly. “Yes, he did.” He sighs again lovingly as he rubs his cheek (the spot where Kyungsoo’s lips was a few hours ago). I’ll never wash or scrub my face forever.

Kris dismisses the derpy giant with a quick goodbye, clicking on the ‘X’ box. Fingers rapping on the desk, the leader frowns as his heartstrings tug painfully from jealousy. URGH, I SHOULD BE THERE, ACTING ALL FACE TO THEM.

So, Kyungsoo likes flowers eh? A light bulb pops up next to his head as he snaps his fingers. This is one of those ‘EUREKA!’ moments except he isn’t sitting in a bathtub full of water. He jumps out of his seat impatiently, long hands searching for his cell.

“Hello? Yes, I’d like to make an order. Do you do deliveries? Yes, perfect. I want it sent by tomorrow.”

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The sun is up and so is Suho as he casually heads over to the door to pick up the daily newspaper except this time there isn’t any newspaper greeting him on the welcome mat. Instead there are rows and rows of (shimmering, glimmering and sparkling) porcelain pots with a variety of flowers in each one. Suho couldn’t help but to gape at the monstrosity of this.

“Um, Baekhyun.” The leader signals for the eyeliner male to step forward. “This is not one of your doings right? This better not be one of you or Chanyeol’s idea of a joke –”

With a blank façade, Baekhyun flicks his hand. “Calm your down.” He peeks from behind Suho’s shoulder to glimpse outside of their dorm, eyes widening humorously. “Okay, don’t calm your down.”

“HOW COULD I NOT CALM MY TI –”

“You don’t have those jiggly chests, hyung.”

“That’s not the problem, Baekhyun. Just who sent this? Dear Lord, how are we even going to take all of these away?”

“Burn them.” Baekhyun mutters like it’s the simplest thing on earth to do. “I’ll get you a box of matchsticks.”

“Burn what?”

The two oldest whip their heads around to find the source of the sleepy voice only to find a half-awake Kyungsoo standing behind them rubbing his eyes trying to withhold a yawn. The doe eyed male is still dressed in his Pororo pyjamas and slippers.

Suho’s eyes twinkle at the endearing sight while Baekhyun mumbles a ‘so adorable’ under his breath. Both instantly forgot that their plan to burn the pots of flowers outside the dorm.

“Excuse me, hyungs. Just let me take a look outside..”

Bewitched by Kyungsoo’s cuteness, the two older ones dumbly step aside from the door and let the younger one go through. Once a squeal vibrates into their eardrums causing them to cringe painfully, the spell is finally dispelled as they begin to berate themselves for not launching into action sooner.

“Who sent these? They’re so lovely. Oh, there’s a card here…OMO, IT’S FROM KRIS HYUNG. Uwahh, such pretty flowers –”

While Kyungsoo keeps complimenting and admiring the flowers, Baekhyun nudges a distracted Suho. “I told you we should have burned this earlier. It seems that Kris doesn’t waste time, does he?”

Suho could only cry from the inside.

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The next few days, Jongin is utterly frustrated by the lack of attention his hyung is giving him. Ever since Kyungsoo received those flowers from Kris, he has been paying too much attention to those (girly girls) flowers, constantly watering them and there’s once that Jongin catches Kyungsoo singing and talking to them like there are his precious babies.

OH HELL NO. I’M THE ONLY BABY KYUNGSOO’S GONNA TAKE CARE OF.

Jongin tosses a heated glare at the unmoving purple orchids outside of their window. You evil beings, you’ve been seducing Kyungsoo hyung with your bad aura. The tanned male hisses like an aggravated cat. TO SAVE KYUNGSOO HYUNG, I SHALL END YOU ALL.

Jongin rubs his hands together, plotting an evil scheme as he cackles manically while glaring at the same pot of orchids.

“Dude, I think he has finally lost it.” Chanyeol shakes his head, wiping his eye for a dramatic effect. “Goodbye, Jongin. You were a nice friend.”

Sehun peeks one more time through the narrow space of the unclosed door, watching his band mate dance around in the room, hands thrown up as he giggles weirdly. The maknae cringes when Jongin trips on a sock, still giggling after he falls on the floor. “He’s a goner.”

"Amen."

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The busybody Jongdae hears the news of EXO-K’s umma receiving tons of roses and multiple presents that have something to do with flowers. Okay, not using his ears but the internet is very useful in times like this. The singer’s eyes widened when he sees a photo of flower pots lining up outside the EXO-K dorm with a caption that says ‘Secret Admirer for EXO-K’s D.O?’

Jongdae takes a deep breath, pinching the bridge of his nose because he feels a pounding headache creeping up on him. “This better be some kind of fake sasaeng article.” He refreshes the page again and nothing seems to change – those huge Arial font seem to mock him.

“THIS GOTTA BE SOME KIND OF JOKE – ”Jongdae screeches, clawing at the computer screen madly.

The XiuHan duo creeps into the room, extremely curious. “Yah, Chen. What’s wrong?” Luhan pokes at the gloomy Jongdae who’s face down on the desk.

“He’s just undergoing his menopause like an old fart, Luhannie. Just ignore him.” Xiumin rolls his eyes, plopping down onto Jongdae’s seat. The cute male eyes the screen once and glances back at Jongdae who’s crying into Luhan’s chest while kicking his legs akin to a sulking child.

WAIT. WHAT.

Xiumin blinks. He stares at Jongdae. Then, he stares at Luhan. He stares back at Jongdae and then back to Lu – OKAY, THEY’RE NOT THE PROBLEM. Xiumin whirls around and stares at the computer, jaw dropping at the title of the article.

“Want some bread, Tao?” Lay chews on a piece of white bread.

Tao shakes his head, sipping the hot coffee from his cup.

“OH HELL ING NO, EVEN THE GOD OF STEAMBUNS WOULD NOT ALLOW THIS! BABY DONUT IS MINE –”

“EXCUSE YOU, KYUNGSOO’S BEEN MINE EVERSINCE I LAID EYES ON HIM –”

“Guys, no fighting please.” Luhan places a hand on each of Xiumin’s and Jongdae’s chests to stop them from jumping on each other. “Obviously, you’re both wrong. Baby Soo’s MINE.” Trust Luhan to be the meditator.

Tao shakes his head and continues drinking.

Lay could faintly hear dduizhang yelling from the toilet something about ‘Kyungsoo’ and ‘mine’. The Changsha Prince frowns, debating with himself whether he should join in the fight to proclaim Kyungsoo as his. No thanks.

“Of course, Kyungsoo gege loves me the most.” A coy smile plays across Tao’s lips.

Okay, Lay takes back what he says. “What?” Lay squints.

“I said, Kyungsoo gege –OMPH”

He doesn’t get a chance to finish his sentence because a green eyed Lay promptly flies across the table and knocks him down from the chair, pulling and scratching his face, hissing like a wild cat.

“STAY AWAY FROM MY BABY!”

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“We’re boys –”

“Men.” A timbre voice corrects.

“Fine, we’re men.” Sehun bites back a snarky hiss instead, choosing to roll his eyes dramatically at the tanned male. Tch, what a .

Jongin huffs and crosses his arms, muttering something along the lines of ‘got that right, brat.’ The dancer flops back onto the couch, his arms cushioning his head.

Sehun scowls, baring white teeth at the unaffected tanned male. Ugh, Jongin never fails to irritate him immensely. Hearing an excited ‘oh, me, me. I have a question!’ from Chanyeol, Sehun answers. “Yes, hyung?”

“Why are we doing this again?” The rapper scratches the back of his neck, eyes landing on each and every member of EXO-K seated in a circle scattered around the living room.

“You idiot,” hisses Baekhyun from beside Chanyeol. “We’re here to settle the debt.” YOUR DEBT TO BE MORE SPECIFIC.

“What debt?”

Now, it’s Jongin’s turn to hiss. “Don’t act stupid on us, sneaky derp! We know you seduced hyung into kissing you!”

“So what.” Chanyeol retorts, crossing his arms, a look on his face that is way too smug for Jongin to accept. If it Sehun hadn’t hold Jongin down, the boy would have clawed and spit on Chanyeol’s face.

“You violated the rules.” Suho states, his angelic aura morphing into a darker and eerier one. “It’s not fair for us. We always take turns.” A smile (smirk?) breaks out of his face.

Chanyeol visibly gulps at the feat of not only facing a (mad) Suho but also four other jealous and green eyed members.

“Just don’t touch his face.” While cracking his knuckles, Sehun reminds the others.

“Hey – hey, c’mon guys! We’re band mates, you can’t possibly harm me right? – ehehheeee – no, no, Baekhyun – Jongin, what are you doing with that bat -”

Outside the dorm, a petite male is dragging a huge bag of garbage to the dumpster, breaths heaving and perspiring heavily. With an almighty huff, he slings the rubbish and throws it into the dumpster. A shrill scream echoes into his ear causing him to whip his head up and lift off his cap, revealing huge unblinking doe eyes.

“W-What was that?” Stuttering and reeling back in surprised, Kyungsoo turns left and right to check for the source of the scream. “Maybe it’s just my imagination.” He shrugs, tucking back on his cap and proceeds to march back up to the dorm.

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Eleven heads fall down dejected at the sound of Lee Soo Man’s grunt. The EXO-K members are sitting on the left side of the meeting desk while EXO-M members are on the other side. Even their managers are seated on each side next to the bands’ respective leaders, glaring at each of their juniors.

Soo Man sighs, pinching his nose. “Can someone please explain to me what happened to these eleven boys to the extend we had to send them to the hospital for minor,” he pauses to eye at Luhan’s nose with a plaster on it, “and major injuries.” He glances (and winces) at Chanyeol who’s completely wrapped in bandages looking every bit like a walking mummy.

The eleven heads (except for Tao because he twisted his neck) shake furiously as mumbled apologies fly out of their mouths.

EXO-K’s manager chastises them. “The eleven of you ought to be ashamed of yourselves.” He nudges Suho who shrieks girlishly, tears springing out of his eyes from the pain of his bruised arm. “Oops, forgot about that.” The manager clears his throat.

“Whatever the problem is I hope you all can settle this in a much proper way, boys.” Soo Man sees all eleven heads nodding. “Meanwhile, where’s Kyungsoo?” He asks, unaware of the heart wrenching groans and head desks from the males in the meeting room.

EXO-M’s manager smiles, clasping his hands together, the relief clear in his eyes. “He’s fine. In fact, he’s the only one who’s healthy and strangely uninjured..” The manager tosses a questioning glance to the males who quickly averted their gazes from him, some whistling and others staring at their feet, faces burning red.

EXO-K’s manager joins in. “He’s at the dorm..” taking care of his plants..

“Oh, I see.” Soo Man raises a pointed eyebrow. “With those injuries, I don’t think you all can dance or sing… I’ll have to delay EXO’s comeback then.” The old man states out as if it is the easiest thing in the world to do.

Straight after hearing the news, the EXO members palm their faces and slam their heads onto the desk in a synchronized motion.

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The SJ member sits outside the balcony, enjoying (feasting) the view in front of him. The sight of his beloved dongsaeng, all cute and adorable watering flowers happily; bouncing here and there to tend the plants is just too much for him to take. Not to mention, that .

“So did it hurt?”

Tilting the watering can back up, Kyungsoo steps back and blinks confusedly at his favourite sunbae. “Excuse me, Ryeowook hyung?”

Ryeowook hides his frustration by giving a seductive smile. “Did it hurt?”

“Hurt?” The younger male comes up next to Ryeowook, confusion written all over his cute face. “What hurts?”

He’s planning to move closer to his dongsaeng’s face, maybe to steal a kiss or two because this is the golden opportunity – all those (annoyingly) possessive members aren’t here and Ryeowook could finally take the chance to confess. “When you fell from heaven, you beautiful ange – LAKFLASMDAMFLASRWPP.” Ryeowook falls flat to the ground, a slipper bouncing off from his head.

Kris gapes at Tao. “Did you just do that to a senior?”

The Chinese male flicks his bangs aside coolly. “So what.”

“You’re so dead.” Kris peeks at an unmoving Ryeowook with a panicky Kyungsoo hovering over him.

“Unless you want me to tell Lee Soo Man-nim about your credit card payment and flowers –”

“Fine. I won’t tell.”

“Good boy.”

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Lady's Corner

SORRY. THIS ONESHOT IS LAME. FORGIVE ME. I CAN'T WRITE PROPERLY NOWADAYS.

Ok. So this took longer than I expected ;n; /dodges flying pans and bricks

Forgive me. Ela dongsaengie, I hope you like this :3 (even if this is a bunch of rubbish I piled up together)

HERE'S YOUR LATE PRESENT. I HOPE YOU LIKE IT.