Awaken My Senses

Description

You didn't need your vision to know that Jonghyun was perfect in every way.

You just knew.

You could feel his hands guide your own along the smooth surface of the piano keys, across the taut guitar strings as he taught you music.  

"Don't have any personal relationships with the people here to help you," you were always warned by Eun-ah, your second mother in the Hwangseo-dong Institute for the Blind.  You had no intention of having a "personal relationship" with Kim Jonghyun, your music instructor whom you came across and now visited every Monday, Wednesday, and Thursday as part of your recreational therapy.  But oh, how you admired him.

You had memorized every inch of the place by now, never obeying suggestions to stay in your room.  You could tell which part of the hallway you were in just by the sounds of your footsteps.  The walls and doors had a natural guide on them for patients, but it was the dent in the wood grain that let you know you were in front of Jonghyun's door.  That, and the sound of the beautiful melodies coming from his instruments or his soft snore.

He could see, and you were fully aware of that.  He could see every single physical flaw of yours and you found it completely unfair that you had no clue as to what he looked like, you just knew the sweet semi-deep tone of his voice, the feel of the parts of his skin you have touched.  You didn't touch his face to save yourself and him the embarrassment, but even then you don't think the structure of his face would register well in your mind.  

You didn't really care much.  You adored every part of him you did know.  The way his chuckle came straight from his throat when he laughed, how his fingers were caloused from years of instrument playing but smooth to the touch and warm when they touched your own.  You felt his hair once, when you had hit him in the back of the head by accident with his own guitar and panicked, touching to feel for any blood as he simply laughed and took your hand away.  It was soft and nice, and thankfully not clotted with blood.  He always smelt nice too, and you could smell his light and clean scent when you both were close enough.  It was a combination of shampoo, the clean smelling kind and an own personal smell, you guess a type of cologne he always used.  It literred him and the room - you could smell him even when he wasn't there.  You asked him once what colonge he used, you thought your father would enjoy it.  He simply laughed and guided your fingers to the keys, telling you that when you master "Mary Had A Little Lamb" he would tell you.  Even when you did, he refused to say.

Kim Jonghyun was just your teacher.  A man whom was paid to put up with you and you took advantage of the fact he could never shoo you away.  It was wrong of you.  You knew he could care less whether or not you showed up to practice your chords - but it didn't help the fact that you were unconditionally infatuated with him.

And you couldn't even see his face.  But never had you felt more alive.

Foreword

Everything is spoken in Korean unless it is otherwise stated (e.g. - "highly accented English"). I gave you the Korean name Jungsik because I depise the blanks and your foreign name doesn't have to change.


"Wake up," you heard outside your door on a rainy Monday morning.  You heard the pitter-patter of raindrops as they brutally attacked your window and you had even heard Eun-ah well before she approached.  You never did well with sleeping through storms.

"I don't want to," you whined, flopping over and covering yourself with a pillow.  "It's raining.  Who wakes up on a rainy day?"

"You," you heard her respond even through your pillow insulation.  She was closer now, though.  You shot the pillow off yourself as you groaned, carefully listening to Eun-ah open the window curtains, as she did every day.  She closed them every night, too, before you slept.  You always insisted there was no reason to, obviously, but she always tsk-ed at you and said that the dark is too gloomy for her and she refused to not let some light in.  She also said there was some kind of difference in sleeping in darkness and light, even to the blind, but you never believed her.  You let her have her routine though.

"Is that..." you smelled the air, the warm smell filling your nostrils.  You flung the covers off yourself as you crawled to the source of the smell at the end of your bed.

"It sure is," she laughed at your enthusiasm.  "Breakfast Americano Special."  She announced in highly accented English.  You almost drooled, smelling the syrup from the hotcakes and the fresh bacon.

"You are going to make me gain weight," you argued, not letting it stop your eagerness as you desperately searched for the fork on the tray with one hand and a strip of bacon with the other.

"Today is a special day," she said in a sing-song tone as she sat next to you on the bed, causing the mattress to shift.

"Really?" you asked, chewing the crispy bacon in your mouth.  You began to think.  What day was it?  Was there something important?

"Of course, your 17th birthday!"  she cheered, smacking you on the back as if you were joking about not knowing.

"Oh," was all you could say.  You guess it was.  You never had a good sense of time.  "I guess so.  Wait...so I'm not getting eggs and bacon every morning from now on?"

"Of course not."

You both laughed as Eun-ah your hair lovingly while you ate.  After you were finished, you stretched your arms above your head.

"That was good, time for a nap~"

"Nope," Eun-ah scolded.  "Not today.  Just because the weather is getting rainy now and you can't go outside for things doesn't mean you get to nap, either."

"Then what do I have to do?"

"Find a hobby."

"My hobby can't be napping?"

"No.  You are going to leave your room today.  Reading isn't going to cut it, either.  I think you've read all the books I've given you, too..."

"Fine."

The silence that filled the air was awkward as you felt her presence leave your side as she walked over to your closet and tried to find something for you to wear.  You informed her you wanted to wear black today, because you were mourning your wasted nap time but she adamantly declined and told you that you would wear green instead.  She left the items on your bed as you felt them before beginning to dress.  She was silent, but you knew she was there.

"Have you heard from my parents?" you asked hesitantly on the subject.  You hadn't seen them since the week you got here a few months ago, even after their promise to visit often.  You took the silence as a big fat "no."

"They are busy, but I am sure they will come by soon," Eun-ah tried assuring you, but you weren't taking the "busy" bull anymore.

"As long as they don't have to deal with me I am sure they don't really mind," you scowled, bringing your blouse over your head before tucking it into your skirt and straightening your stockings.

"Jungsik," Eun-ah said your Korean name softly.  You went by your Korean name, but you always hated how she used it in two situations: when she felt sorry for you or when you were in trouble.

"It's okay," you told her, putting on your boots.  "Today I have other things to worry about, like finding some kind of hobby.  Will you help me with my hair?"

She said nothing as she calmly walked over and took your almost-dry hair out of it's large plait and brushing through it smoothly before helping you tie it back.


You were down on the second floor for the first time in months.  You were told you would have to pick a kind of "therapy" by pursuing a class of some type when the month of April came around.  It was pretty quiet at this time in the morning.  Nobody had classes this early.  You focused more on feeling the wall as you walked.  You figured you would make a few circuits up and down the hallway so you looked productive to anybody who passed, and then would take up enough time before going back to Eun-ah and saying "Maybe next time."

You were about halfway down the long corridor when you heard music.  You stopped.  The wall said this current room was writing, the last one was a room owned by some person you didn't know.

You ventured down the hallway a little faster than usual, still taking your time but picking up the pace.  You wanted to know the source of the music.  How much fun would a music class be?  It was piano music, playing a sort of sad yet beautiful piece.  Soon, you made it even further down the hallway and discovered an un-marked place of wall.  It said "Violin" but the words were heavily sanded down, almost unreadable.  There was a piece of paper above it.  You felt along the words, reading "Kim Jonghyun - 128" then the words "Guitar and Piano" below it.  It must have been new.  But why would an instructor have a room number?  Only boarders had room numbers.

You were soon distracted by a new melody being played on the piano.  It was a bit more happy.  It flowed beautifully.  You had no clue how to play any instrument, so it made you really envious.  You got lost in the music and its notes.  You felt slightly creepy, nodding along to the music by yourself in the hallway.

"Hello," a voice broke you from your trance.  You snapped your head to the side where the voice came from as the music carried on.

"Hello," you offered back politely, holding out your palm, waiting for a response.  The man did nothing.  You felt no card in your hand.

"Um..." the man hestitated before you quickly withdrew your hand.

"I'm sorry," you shook your head slightly.  You forgot, during the morning, the downstairs classes functioned as supplemental classes for university students from the neighboring school, though they were restricted from the blind institute's floors.  He probably didn't work here, he was probably just a student.  "I misinterpreted."

"It's cool," the man chuckled.  It was awkward, you wanted to turn away and walk off, but that would be rude.  "Do you have a class down here this morning or something?"

"Yes," you lied.  "But I think I am a bit early.  My apologies."  You fixed to turn around.

"No, it's okay.  What class are you looking for?  I can help you get there."

It was a rule not to accept "help" from people you did not know.  Most of the time, they did not have bad intentions, but only people who worked at the institute were allowed to guide you anywhere alone.

"It's fine, I'll just go back to my room."

"Are you sure?"

You realized the music had stopped.

"Yes, I am sure."

"Oh, there you are," a second voice piped up.  Now you really panicked, because you had no idea who it belonged to as they approached.  "I was waiting."

Right as you were about to speak up and say something, a hand with a hard plastic card slipped under your own hand.  You felt it.  "Kim Jonghyun" it said.  It stated the same thing as the paper outside the door.  It was a method your particular institute had - you were supposed to present your card to all patients upon meeting them if they are unfamiliar with you.

"Right..." you agreed, nodding slightly.

"Let's go, I have something new to show you," he carefully placed his hand on your shoulder before turning you towards the door.  You heard the other man simply cough then walk off.  You were inside the unfamiliar room before the new acquaintance of yours let go of your shoulder and shut the door behind you.

"Why are you wandering around by yourself?" was the next words the man spoke after you guys were alone.

"I...was told to look for a hobby.  I'm not helpless," you scowled, crossing your arms, hoping he got the point.  You did not like being treated like you were nine.

"You're not supposed to be down here when the university students are, they aren't sure how to handle encounters."

"You make me sound like I'm same crazed zoo animal on the loose.  I don't appreciate it."  All you heard was a sigh before the man walked past you.  You didn't bother to follow him.

"I'm sorry," he stated simply.  "I'm new at this kind of thing...working here."

"I could tell."

"Did you pick up my name already?"

"Kim Jonghyun, wasn't it."

"Yes, and your own?"

"My Korean name is Junsik," you offered.  "Room 437."

"I don't think we're quite on the level for you to give me your room number, now are we," he joked, laughing as you blushed slightly at what he was implying.

But it was that laugh...the laugh he emitted that made you speechless.  It sounded so musical, so nice.

"You have a lot to learn about dealing with patients," you scolded him.

"And you have a lot to learn, too."

"What?"

"Well, don't you want to learn music?  Isn't that what I'm here for?"

"Well I-"

"I'm sure you're more of a book reader type of person, aren't you?"

"Hey," you yelped, pointing at where you believed the source of his voice was coming from.  "I'll have you know I can do anything I put my mind to.  I as a matter of fact would love to learn music and for acting so smart with me, I'm not going to give you a break."

"Alright," he chuckled at your probably ridiculous looking outburst as you heard him approach you.  He gently took your wrist and corrected your angle, pointing where you were almost touching his chest.  "Call me teacher and use proper honorifics from now on.  I am no longer your peer, I am your teacher."

You could hear him so close, and due to lack of words you just nodded.

You will come to know that voice fairly well.  You will also come to predict his every move and even sometimes what he would say next.

But most of all...you believed you were going to fall for your new teacher, Kim Jonghyun.

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