Too much dreams I wanted to achieve. Too much hopes I wanted to reach. Too much pain I got in my life. I always said that I was gonna make it, I was gonna make it to the top. There I was, crying my eyes out, it seemed that my lungs had just been ripped out my heart. I failed, I was thrown away. I’m not gonna let it happen twice over my life.

The things I’ve been working my on, gone. The sweat I’ve been dripping off, didn’t matter. No one accepted me, accepted my works. I was just rubbish. Even my friends, they were making me like a fool. I was being outsider to them.

And I didn’t know what I’ve done so wrong that I had to be hated like that. I hated for being hated. Everyone judged me before I had a chance to show them who I was, who I really really was. Now that I’ve been thrown, I had to struggle searching for some rice.

Rice is . I didn’t want rice, I wanted my name back, I wanted people to trust me as they used to do to me. I wanted them to accept me. Luckily, the company I’ve been transferred to had such a great people in it.

I met some people I’ve known before, and I met him. The one I wouldn’t bother to say ‘hi’, the one I felt so annoying in the first time, but the one who accepted my , complete with all my weaknesses. Yang YoSeob.

The first time I got in this company, he’d been there for 4 years. For that such a long time, he hadn’t been debuted yet. The ‘hello’ he said back there still lingers. The other might just see the cuteness of him, but I saw another, far beyond those brown eyes, I saw his fears.

“They don’t trust us, and it makes me working harder and harder. I want to show them, that I capable, I can sing well, that I’m not a . I’m afraid they just see us as a recycle group, I’m just afraid they don’t give us any chance.”

That was then I felt another feeling, he was just as scared as me. That was then I made a promise to myself, I was gonna make it to the top of the world. I barely slept those nights, I stayed awake, I wrote everything that popped up in my mind, I wrote for me, I wrote for my group, for him.

As always, God is Almighty. He gave me a way by Tiger hyung. I was asked to write an intro for our debut song. I started working even I didn’t know what’s going to come out. Earlier when I answered Tiger hyung’s call, he told me to think of an intro, so I wrote this really quickly.

As time we were gonna debut come, we gave all we had. Not to mention the haters, there was a lot who claimed as a B2UTY themselves. B2UTY and B2ST. How perfect. I thank them with all my heart, we thank them with our heart.

Now that we’ve come to our second mini album, I think I’d need a refreshing. I realize my way is just too far, too difficult to ride. During this one year which has been so long and short, it seems that I’ve gained my strength because of a person. No, I mean, that person. Because of him, I could be the way I am now.

So what’s the point of planning a lot of dreams when we don’t even know whether we’ll live that long or not. I decide tattooing myself. Carpe diem, quam minimum credula postero. Now I live for this day, I live for today. The pain I get from the tattoo, can’t be compared the pain I got way back.

YoSeob often tells me about how excited him having those beautiful B2UTYs, I don’t expect it too myself. Maybe it’s time for me to say, this body doesn’t belong to me, it belongs to my fans. Our body don’t belong to us, they belongs to our fans.

I’m not gonna let it slip, again. I’m not gonna hurt them, especially him. I’ve promised, I’d be tough. The one who’s always been protecting me by my side, the love and care that I’ve received from him, to the point that it’s even flooding into me. I don’t know if I’ll be able to return all 100% of it. His so unconditional love, the one that makes me still rocking this stage.

Thanks to him.