The twosome were on the empty school football field, laying down side by side and staring at the irregular shapes in the sky.

It was the summer and they decided to take every chance they got by themselves. They lived at home together, but they felt that home wasn’t necessarily the place to talk privately to each other comfortably.

They’d been there for hours now—not even realizing they’d been there for so long.

This time, they hadn’t spoken a word. It was silent to the point it was awkward for the both of them. The only thing that hung between them was the small breezes that passed through.

Taemin’s eyes strained on the clouds, too caught up in his thoughts to even care for shapes.

His brother graduated a few weeks ago and had already accepted a collage overseas. His brother told everyone. Everyone; his friends, their parents and teachers.

But him.

And Jinki had the audacity to keep it from him and he still hasn’t said anything to him yet.

How could he do this to him? He could discuss it with everyone else but he avoided the subject with his own little brother—someone he lived with.

He found out before graduation on Jinki’s last day of school. He was talking to a group of his friends around their lockers and it became a hot topic with them. Taemin was hiding around the corner, his eyes wide and his tongue stuck in his throat without choking as he heard what came from his brother’s mouth.

I’m actually goin’ to Florida, guys. I confirmed it in the middle of the year.

Taemin sighed, closing his aching eyes that were already threatening his composure at the thought.

Don’t tell Taemin, okay?

 No, don’t tell Taemin. Don’t tell Taemin about why there was excitement in his voice and had eager movements.

Why? Was he planning to tell him at a special time?

It wouldn’t have even mattered when he told him, now. The fact that he accepted so long ago and didn’t even bother was way too long.

He didn’t understand how his brother’s mind was working. They told each other everything because their relationship was that trustworthy. They both participated one-hundred percent in it.

Now Jinki’s percentage went down.

  “Taemin?” he asked.

He slowly opened his eyes, staring at the blue sky with a hum.

He heard a shift and saw Jinki sit up, staring at the shiny and empty bleachers. Jinki took deep breaths and pulled his fingers though his hair, “Why are you angry at me?”

He blinked, raising his eyebrows as he pulled his hands to the back of his head, “What are you talking about?” he innocently questioned, though, his voice had a hard edge to it.

Jinki turned his head around, his wide almond eyes staring at Taemin almost discriminatingly, “Don’t lie, dongsaeng. You’ve been like this specifically since the last week of school. Tell me, now.”

  “Why should I?” he rolled his eyes, “I don’t need to tell you everything.”

He didn’t look at him in the face, but he did manage to see his eyebrows rise.

So sly, he was being. Pretending he had nothing to hide.

  “What do you mean?” he sternly questioned, “We tell each other everything and you decide to stop now? What’s wrong with you?”

Taemin scoffed, taking his hands from behind his head and crossing them, closing his eyes, “We tell each other everything, huh?” he opened his eyes and pinpointed on him angrily, “Are you sure we’ve been doing that, huh?”

There was tension between them, and it wasn’t just from Taemin. He could feel Jinki’s stare was a lot harder than concern. It was almost suffocating even though they had plenty of space from each other.

  “Taemin, what’s wrong?” he asked again.

He didn’t even see why he still played innocent. He had to tell that, by now, Taemin knew everything.

He sat up, scooting right a little to give him more space. He stood on his knees, pointing at him with an angry expression, “What’s wrong? Are you sure you even need to ask?! Are you that dense, Jinki?!”

He was getting even angrier because there was water in his eyes—but Jinki couldn’t see that.

  “Hey,” his brother’s voice went sharp, “Don’t you dare be informally rude like that to me.”

Taemin scoffed again, his arms reaching to the sky and heavily falling down in mockery and smacking his thighs, “Oh, I can’t be rude, I get it. Fine. You can be the rude one and I’d have to be the one to put up with it; yeah, that’s so fair.”

He couldn’t even make out his brother’s outline. All he could see were splattered colors.

  “Taemin,” he threatened, “Stop being stupid and just talk. I just asked and you’re blowing up on me!”

Taemin had to keep to being strong, but the more Jinki denied any problem, the more it hurt and the closer tears had fallen, “You . . . Just . . . You!”

  “What?!”

  “It’s your fault!” he screamed, refusing to blink or build up tears, “It’s your fault!”

Jinki huffed in frustration, “Taemin, what did I—”

He stopped.

Taemin couldn’t hold it and blinked, water falling to his cheeks uncontrollably. His vision still blurred with the oncoming tears and he breathily sobbed for a second before turning his head away and rubbing his tears away.

  “Taemin?” his brother’s voice had become softer, more concerned, “Taemin . . . why are you crying?”

He didn’t answer and scooted further away, refusing to meet his brother’s gaze.

He didn’t expect it to hurt any more than it was now, but there was an even worse pang in his heart.

Just why wouldn’t he tell him?

  “Taemin,” Jinki softly called as he could hear rustling behind him—he was getting closer.

  “Don’t touch me,” he blubbered, hiding his face with his hands, “Don’t.”

But he didn’t listen to him. A familiar embrace was stuck around him, holding him closely and tightly.

He hated the embrace. Jinki thought a simple embrace could make this better? It was his fault to begin with; he can’t comfort.

  “Taemin,” he breathed in his ear, “Taemin, why are you like this?”

He resented how his bare arms rubbed against his brother’s. It was skin ship he loved from him. It always made him feel so connected with his brother but now he didn’t even think a connection was there anymore.

He was warm. He was so relieving and yet Taemin didn’t want it from him.

  “No.”

Jinki’s skin shifted on his and he flinched at the contact. He felt his chest against his back and his hands over his own, slowly prying them away as Jinki’s chin rested on his shoulder.

  “What did I do, Taemin?” he asked, anxiety laced through his voice. His face pressed against Taemin’s neck and breathed.

Taemin stiffly shook his head, looking back up at the sky with red eyes. He couldn’t answer him because he didn’t even know how to say it.

But Jinki waited, staying quiet.

Did he really not have a clue?

Minutes were passing and evening was coming, dimming the sky and Taemin’s vision; his thoughts clouded with so much misery.

  “Taemin?” Jinki spoke.

He shook his head again.

Fingers laced through Taemin’s, pulling his hands back to his shoulders, kissing the closest hand to him, “Taemin, you need to tell me.”

And that’s where Taemin’s vision went red.

He had to tell him? Taemin had to tell him everything while he didn’t even keep his side of the agreement? No, he didn’t have to tell him. Maybe if he weren’t so dumb, he could figure it out on his own.

  “Have to tell you?” he spat, voice faltering, “I have to tell you when you don’t tell me everything?”

His hands were given a squeeze as Jinki’s face buried into his neck, “What did I do wrong?” he whispered, “I’ll fix it, Tae, I’ll fix it. Don’t be like this. It hurts to see you like this.”

Taemin sniffed before a small whimper escaped his dry lips. He had so much to say but didn’t even know if he’d say it all.

  “I don’t like it, Taemin,” he went on, shaking his head on Taemin’s neck, “I don’t like you looking so hurt or speaking so angrily rude to me. What did I do wrong?”

Taemin jerked his head away, forcing himself out of Jinki’s clutch and standing, putting distance between him and the kneeling brother.

He took a deep breath.

  “You,” his voice wavered, shaking his head, “You didn’t tell me. How could you not tell me? Me out of everyone! Do you know . . . Why?”

His thoughts weren’t collected. He stuttered repeatedly and blinked furiously.

  “I didn’t tell you . . .?” his eyes looked up at Taemin desperately.

Taemin yelled out and clutched his hair, turning around to face away from him in defeat.

  “Why didn’t you tell me you were leaving to study in America?” he screamed at the bleachers.

His thoughts were dragging down his energy and the fact Jinki wasn’t answering made it all worse. So he really didn’t want him to know. Well, it was a shame that he did and found out in such a low way.

  “We agreed,” he cried, “We agreed to tell each other everything no matter how bad it was. But you broke that. You didn’t tell me this in February! You went on about it to everyone but me! You left me out! When were you gonna tell me?! Never? You’d just . . . you’d leave one day and I’d have to find out from mom and dad that you left? Do you know how . . . how . . . I can’t . . .”

The tears were apparent on his face once more as he sobbed violently, his depressing shake spreading through his body in overwhelm.

  “Do you know . . . You . . . Do you . . .” his words were short and out of place, no longer coherent as he just focused on sobbing.

As if it were on some drama, Taemin was spun around and clutched to his brother’s body, Jinki’s hand on top of his head and burying his brother’s face into his shoulder.

Jinki just held him there as he wept on him. Taemin’s hands clutched the shirt at Jinki’s hips, holding him closer and not giving a damn that he just wanted his comfort even though he was the problem.

  “Do you know . . . how . . . I’d f-feel?” he cried, “Do you know what I’d think at that point? T-that you didn’t really love me and just wanted to leave me? A-and that’s how you and I won’t be . . . won’t be . . . like the way we are now! I-Is that what you want? You could’ve just told me to back off because I’d understand. We’re growing to the point that what we do is childish. I understand completely. You should’ve just told me! Then it wouldn’t be s-so hard!”

Taemin was clutched closer, feeling his brother’s face against his cheek—seemingly wetter than before, now.

He struggled to let go of him, but couldn’t manage it. It hurt to detach from him while he still could.

  “Tae-Taemin,” Jinki’s voice was unsteady, holding him closer—which seemed impossible, but he made it possible, “I . . . I’m so sorry, baby brother,” he whispered, “I’m so sorry.”

  “Then why?” he sobbed, “Why?”

  “Because I . . . I was waiting . . . for another offer somewhere here. I w-was going to tell you that I got into a school here. Mom and dad . . . they made me apply for Florida and I only told everyone I was going to Florida. I got accepted but I didn’t send a confirmation, Taemin, I didn’t. I only said that to get everyone off my case.”

Taemin clutched on to his back, burying his face into Jinki’s shirt, “You still didn’t tell me.”

  “Because I didn’t know how to come out with it. You know I’m touchy about school . . .” He heard his brother sniff, “I was waiting for the end of this week for somewhere here and tell mom and dad they just delayed my acceptance letter. I don’t want to stop our relationship, Taemin; I love everything about our love for each other. Stop crying, Tae, I’m sorry I didn’t want you to know. Please stop crying, I’m begging you, I’m sorry,” he breathed on his hair.

Taemin found it within himself to at least die down his voice.

He found understanding.

He always knew his brother was protective of him, but never like that.

He couldn’t bring himself to be angry anymore.

  “I’m sorry,” Taemin whispered.

Jinki pulled from his brother and Taemin could see the red in his small eyes. He regretted being so easily mislead—how could he have even thought his brother didn’t love him like he always had?

  “I’m so sorry,” he repeated, wiping the few trails of wetness on his brother’s cheeks, holding his face in his hands, “Hyung, I’m sorry.”

Jinki’s hands held on to Taemin’s, “Don’t be sorry; it was my fault I did that.”

And the way Jinki’s face portrayed so many apologies . . .

They both sniffed, and Taemin managed a small smile, “C’mon, smile, Hyung. I can’t stand you looking like that, either,” he patted his cheeks.

  “I’m sorry, Tae.”

  “It’s okay. I’m sorry, too. But . . . it’s cleared, now. There’s no reason for this . . .”

Jinki produced his best toothy smile for his brother, warm and relieved, “Come here.”

Taemin shakily chuckled as he was brought in, pecking his brother on the lips before engulfing each other in a hug.

  “But . . .” Taemin started, “What if you aren’t accepted somewhere here?”

Jinki kissed his cheek and patted his back reassuringly, “Then I’m taking you to Florida no matter how many times you object that you won’t make friends. I’ll keep you to myself,” he chuckled, “But really. If it doesn’t work out, we’ll figure out something, right?”

Taemin’s smile faltered, but he nodded, clutching him closer, relishing in his warmth.

  “Taemin,” Jinki breathed.

He hummed.

  “I love you, baby bro.”

Taemin smiled again.

  “I love you, too, Hyung.”

 

 

---Note~---

I seriously can't help to write the worst cliche things. I hate being cliche, but I can't hold in my ideas.

ONTAE LOVE IS CUTE. SO DON'T DENY IT. My feels are hurting so bad.

I'm seriously in love with this oneshot; I can decently keep rereading it.

Onew would totally be my bias if it weren't for Minho and my obsession for rappers.

I have one more birthday oneshot to upload before writing/finishing the last two.

Wish me luck because my attention span is so low, right now. OTL.

Bye. c:

~FlaMinhoe

Tumblah' baby ;D

(Currently redecorating it)