Theme song. SNSD Jessica, Because Tears Are Overflowing.

Ara put her jogging shoes and jogs to YGE building, which are 10km away. She lowers her cap and tucks all her in. Then, she raises the hood of her sweater and covers her cap. Next, she wears sunglass over it. If anyone runs into her, she just be another maniac who jogs in a winter night with temperature almost reach 10 Celcius.

 

She takes a deep breath and run down to the lobby using stairs. She stop at the post-guard desk, “If anybody searching for me, I’m going to YGE building,” She said to the guard.

 

“Wait agasshi, are you going there on feet?” The guard asks.

 

“Yeah,” She shrugs like it is nothing. She steps out in the cold and is a cold winter blow hit her face. She rubs her hands together and put on her cheek for some warmth. She starts to jog. Her feet run involuntary like it is a normal walk and she is not her own mind through the jog.

 

She blinks and she arrived at in front of YG building’s main door. She walks in as the automatic door opens. She waves at the receptionist and walk to the elevator. As the elevator, G-dragon comes out from the elevator. His face brightened up as he saw her.

 

“Hey, I haven’t see you around lately,” G-dragon goes to her and grabs her hand. “Goddammit you are cold. And you are sweating like mad, are you okay?” G-Dragon tries to feel her forehead but stops when Ara takes a step back from him.

 

“I’m fine,” Ara whispers on volume that only G-Dragon could hear and pull her hand from G-Dragon grasp. Ara looks down to her sudden interest feet. She bits her lower lips to gain some strength not to broke down in front of G-Dragon.

 

“Ara,” G-Dragon whispers and take a step forward to Ara only to have Ara step backward, away from G-Dragon like he somes kind of pest.

 

“I,” G-Dragon whispers. “Just take care okay,” G-Dragon stop himself before his hand reach out to Ara.

 

 Ara nods. After G-Dragon sees she nods, he moves out from her way allowing her to enter the elevator. He looks at with worrying and hurt expression written all over his face. Ara still looking down at her feet until the one second before the lift close, Ara looks up and there was G-Dragon still watching her.

 

She released a deep breath as she just realized she have been holding her breath from the moment she meet up with G-Dragon. She rests against the rail on the elevator. Her walls nearly crumble down as she saw him. She wanted to cry in his arms but she fight away that thought. She takes a deep breath again but it seems like her chest getting tighter.

 

She goes into level where the gyms are located. She keeps walking to the boxing side. Good thing it is empty. She doesn’t feel like seeing anyone anymore. She goes to the locker room and change into shorts and a sleeveless shirt.

 

Her thigh feel sore from those jog but any pain is better than the pain in her heart. She clutches her chest; she still feels the pain in it. Guess she just needs to add more pain in other part now. She wrapped both hands in bandage and made a fist.

 

Jessica put her hands on Kris’s arm and tiptoes as she kissed her.

Lay pushed her against the rail of stairs.

Kris smile as Ara wears a wedding dress that he picked.

 

“Shut it, will you,” She screams to no one and slapping your locker closed. Again, she takes a deep breath and rested her head against the locker.

 

Kris smiles as he holds the flowers on your first meeting.

Kris smiles with a bouquet of Ferrero Rocher on his hand.

Cheondung smiles with a bouquet of Ferrero Rocher on his hand.

 

She walks lifelessly towards the punching bag and she throws light punches on it.

 

The first time Kris holds her hand, it seems like the world is brighter.

The sweet smiles that he offers when he saw her in their dorm in China.

“,” She hoarsely whispers. She takes a deep breath and throws more punches to the innocent punching bag.

 

“You are my fan right?”

“So, I’m your fan, your husband and your friend,”

 

She takes a deep breath and kick sideways to the punching bag. More kicks again. Sweats that run on her face mixed with the uncontrollable tears that keep getting out like a loose leaking pipes.

 

When he takes care of her in China, in her hotel, at the graveyard.

In SM building, when Jessica nearly slaps her for just being there.

Jessica grabs Kris’s hand at Kris’ and Chanyeol’s birthday party.

 

More kicks and punches are thrown. She ignores the sharp pain on her thigh and wrist. She still can feel the pain in her heart.

 

Kris shows up at her last performance on Music Core.

She shows up at “Like A G6” performance in SM Town Concert.

Cheondung saying, “I love you”

 

She stops and hugs the punching bag. She turns to left and look at her reflection on the big mirror. She looks like a big mess. Her hair that was neatly tied up has gone loose. Her eyes are red from the tears that are still flowing.

 

“Look at you all mess, eeww look at you”

“Shut up,” She whispers and takes a step forward towards to the mirror.

“It is a no wonder even after you sick attempt to fit his ideal type, Kris still likes Jessica,”

“Shut up!” She screams to hollow air.

“Jessica kisses Kris. And guess what he lets her. And you know it is because of his unresolved feelings towards her,”

 

“Shut up! Damn it, just shut up!!!” She screams and punches her reflection on the mirror. She heard a crack. It is probably from the mirror, or from her broken fingers, or from her broken heart.

 

 

 

“Oh, Ara-shi. Why is your hand all wrap up?” Shindong asks her. They are on commercial break from Shindong’s radio show. She is here to promote her new drama with Cheondung as the lead actors.

 

Cheondung who is sitting beside her quickly turns to look at her. He knew about the broken finger. And truthfully, he thinks he might trigger the incident. He shouldn’t rush the confession. After the confession, Ara acts all normal with her in public but between just them two; there is an invisible wall.

 

“Ah, just a minor accident during boxing practice.” Ara said calmly.

 

“Oh, really,” Shindong nods. The writer gives cue to be ready in 10 seconds.

 

“Ah, now we are back in MBC Radio Stop The Boring Time. And we are here with our actors of ‘Kitchen God’, Actress-dol Ara and MBLAQ Thunder,”

 

Ara and Thunder claps and whistle as Shindong announced their names. “If you miss the first part of our show, we were just talking about Kitchen God. Kitchen God is where Ara as the head chef of Sowon Hotel compete with Thunder, the head chef of Sarang Hotel. This requires a lot of cooking in hand. And Ara-shi stated before that her cooking is test to her wits and yet she enjoy it very much because of she loves cooking while Thunder is a bit struggling, but don’t worry everyone he assures us the he will still do her best,”

 

Ara and Cheondung nods to the speech.

 

“When I tend to cook I always cook in big portion, so I always have my friends come over to my house in weekend and we eat together if I had some free time. I always invited YG family member and sometimes Thunder here also comes to MBLAQ,” Ara said.

 

“Ah, really. Then Super Junior can we come too sometimes?” Shindong said while wriggling his eyebrows.

 

“Ah, sure. I can cook for in that much portion though I’m not sure that all 12 persons can fit in my house,” Ara teases back.

 

“Ah, don’t worry. We will come in two groups. How about EXO, have they come to your house?”

 

“Ah, they haven’t. I think it most if because of both of us busy. And I still wonder how to fit those 12 kids in my house,” Ara dodges the question.

 

“Ah, that’s right. I heard there is an interesting story on how you become an actress because you were supposed to debut with 2NE1,” Shindong asks he scans through the scripts.

 

“Ah, that is right. Everyone on in 2NE1 is train to be solo artist until one day, YG sajangnim call us five to record songs together. It turns out that the voices of us five produce a wonderful song. We harmonize each other. So, I was really excited and we started to practice together. Dance routine, singing songs. Even CL and me bonded over that time and we made our own unit,”

 

“Oh, really? Then, what happen?” Shindong asks.

 

“Then, one day YG sajangnim call me on my own. And then he said to me, Ara-shi you are too beautiful too be in 2NE1 group and I think your musical talents are not that good as your acting talents, so yeah, you should be an actress. So, I was like oh really. And I don’t know what runs into my mind that I agree with him but I made a promise that after five years of acting, I wanted to be an artist and produce an album. And yeah, he said yes,”

 

“Omo, you did that? To YG sajang-nim. You a really brave,”

 

“I guess I was so pump up to be able to perform on stage and I made him promise to my wish. And the funny thing, after the promise I think back and I was like OMG how where in the hell of the world I got the courage to do that to our sajangnim,” Ara chuckles as she reminisce.

 

“Omo, you are really brave. And look after five years in acting; you are able to perform your song. Even now with G-Dragon-shi and CL-shi,” Shindong claps his hand.

 

“That’s true. Thought I haven’t been able to produce an album, to even have the opportunity to perform on stage with my fellow bestfriends is already a big honor. I’m really thankful to both of them,” Ara smiles widely.

 

“Ah, what an interesting story. Okay, the drama wills first air on 25^th December on MBC channel, so everyone mark your calendar. So, speaking of Christmas is there anything that you have plans to do? We can start with Ara-shi?” Shindong said.

 

“Ah, for my Christmas this year. I decided to spend it differently and I might not be in Korea. I might be back in China or Canada, getting back to my roots,” Ara said.

 

“How about your loved ones like uhm coughKRIScough ?” Shindong teases her. Cheondung flinches as he hears that, he quickly touches Ara’s fingers.

 

“Ah, let’s not mixed the show with the reality but for our fans, I will have special last episode with him. So I hope all the fans can enjoy the episode,” Ara fakes a smile.

 

“Oh really? I was sad when I hear the news about you and Kris have to leave the show early but you both must have your own concrete reason right. So, now we can move to Thunder. What are your plans for Christmas?” Shindong smiles.

 

Ara fisted her fingers and she takes a deep breath, as the spotlight is move to Thunder. She winces lowly as the pain from the broken finger hit her.

 

Thunder un-fisted her hand and intertwine his fingers with hers. “Just another family gathering and the difference for this year, I might cook a Christmas dish since I have a good practice with the drama,” Thunder chuckles.

 

“Ah, practice made perfect. Hey look we have a caller. Hello, please state your name and where are you from,”

 

“Annyeonghaseyo, I’m Nara from Apgujeong. I wanted to ask Thunder oppa. You are dating Ara unnie right? That is all,”

 

“Ah, Thunder-shi do you want to answer these or we can skip and go to next caller?” Shindong asks.

 

“Annyeonghaseyo, Nara-shi. I really wish I can say yes to her question but sadly the answer is no,” Thunder said then looks at Ara who was struggling to keep calm.

 

“Ah, really. Well now that the virtual marriage is coming to an end maybe you can try your luck after this,” Shindong jokes.

 

“Yeah, maybe. “ Thunder chuckles.

 

“Okay, next caller. Please state your name and where are you from?”

 

“Annyeonghaseyo Shindong oppa, Thunder oppa and Ara unnie. Ara unnie, I always a big fan of you. Ah, my name is Jaelin from Seoul. I ship all your pairing in every drama that you act. But right now, I ship you with Kris oppa and sometimes with Thunder oppa. Ahhh really, I can’t choose. You look very comfortable with both of them. Ahh, really. Annyeong!”

 

The studio echoes with laughter of Shindong, Ara and Thunder.

 

“We have a very enthusiastic fan of yours Ara-shi,” Thunder said.

 

“Ah, anyyeonghaseyo Jaelin. Thank you for all the shipping. Ah, I don’t know what to say. I’m thankful. Saranghae,” Ara made a love sign over her head. Comfortable with both Kris and Thunder, hum.

 

“Though I think Ara is most comfortable with me, I think,” Thunder interjects. “I mean, we have been filming a lot of drama and cf together,” He continues shamelessly.

 

Ara smiles at Thunder’s antics. She elbows Thunder’s arm with her free hand. Thunder smirks at her.

 

“Ah Jaelin-shi must be spazzing with happiness right. Ah, I can’t agree more Thunder-shi. So, okay next caller before we play the requested song. Anyeonghaseyo, please state your name and where are you calling from,”

 

“Annyeonghaseyo, I’m Wu Yifan from Seoul,”

 

Ara stops smiling as she heard the voice. Her chest tightens and her hearts throbs. Thunder pats slowly at their intertwined fingers. Ara looks at Thunder then she looks at her manager that was standing behind the glass windows. He is showing his thumbs up.

 

“I want to ask Ara-shi from a fan view. I personally think she suits well in WGM with EXO Kris, what she will do for tomorrow since tomorrow is the last recording of WGM,”

 

“Ah, can we skip this caller?” Ara calmly jokes.

 

“Eyy,” Kris said.

 

“I’m afraid that we can’t do that Ara-shi. All our calls are precious especially after they got through,” Shindong said in joking tone.

 

“Really. Uhm, since it is a last episode, it will be a surprise. So if I tell you right now, it won’t be a surprise right?” Ara said calmly with contradicting to her heart, which is beating faster than normal.

 

“But, but” Kris whines.

 

“Anyeonghaseyo Kris-shi,” Thunder interjects.

 

“Ah Annyeonghaseyo Thunder-shi. I nearly forget you are there,”

 

“Mwo, Kris-shi” Now it is turn for Thunder to whine.

 

“Wu Yifan-shi, maybe this is the time to stop your pranking and please introduce yourself,” Shindong interrupts.

 

“Anyeonghaseyo, I’m EXO Multilingual speaker, Kris imnida,”

 

“Looks like Kris=shi got a lot of free time today. What are you doing right now?” Shidong asks.

 

Ara takes a deep breaths and try to stop from the thoughts are spinning her head.  Thunder whispers “ Hold on Ara,”

 

“Ah right now, I’m in the middle of practice for MBC Gayo Daejun. In short, our fans will be satisfy with our performance with out first stage,”

 

“Ah really. Aigoo, right now I can hear faint voices of EXO member.”

 

“Ara noona!” Chen’s voice echoes through the call.

 

“Chen, please behave!” Kris orders.

 

“Anyeonghaseyo, EXO main vocal, Chen imnida. That’s all, have a good day listeners” Chen said.

 

“Ah really, looks like our Chen-shi is really free. Ah, I heard the pd-nim are calling for EXO now,”

 

“Okay, I got to go. I hope all the listeners have a good day. Ara-shi, see you tomorrow kay, annyeong everyone!” With that Kris calls off the phone.

 

“Ah, what with that abrupt goodbye but nevertheless he managed to do proper closing. Okay, everyone let’s listen to most requested song, B.A.P.’s Warrior,”

 

 

 

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A/R: I have updated! Hehee. This chapter looks a bit all over the place but I hope I potray Ara's sadness. Without me knowing this fanfiction turns into somewhat angst-ish story. Kekekee. Do you ee what I did there? I basically squish everyone there. Hiks. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter and don't forget to comment. Hey welcome to new subscribers! *throw cookies to everyone*