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(based on "Just The Way You Are", by Bruno Mars)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Il89cDngeG0 

(cover by J Rice & Jason Chen)

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"Gaku?" Chacha asked in a shy tone, just barely peering around the corner of the living room.

Gackt looked up from his book and immediately put it down, with concern, when he saw his lover hiding behind the wall. The older man looked extremely hesitant and he was biting his lower lip- a habit, Gackt knew, that Chacha only fell into when he was nervous.

"What's wrong, sweetheart?" Gackt pressed, quickly crossing the polished wood floor of the room, to his lover's side.

"Can you give me your honest opinion?" Chacha asked, with an expression that reminded Gackt of a lost child at the supermarket.

Gackt nodded, puzzled as to why Chacha seemed so worried and refused to come out from behind the corner of the wall.

Chacha took a deep breath.

"Do these jeans make me look...funny?" He asked, finally stepping out from behind the wall.

Gackt didn't know what to say. If anything, Chacha looked more beautiful than ever- the jeans fit around his bony hips snuggly and framed his willowy thighs in the most attractive way.

"What do you mean, 'funny'?" Gackt further inquired, finding nothing at all to be amiss about Chacha's gorgeous body.

"Well... I guess they fit alright around my waist, but don't you think they make my thighs look too big? I mean, when I tried them on at the store, they looked okay, but I tried them on at home again and they just don't look...flattering anymore. Maybe I should return them. And I should probably go on a diet-"

A ring-adorned finger placed gently over his lips was all it took for Chacha to fall silent, albeit with a pink blush blossoming over his cheeks. Gackt's touch never failed to make his heart flutter and spill a pink stain over his fair skin.

"You wanted my honest opinion, right?" Gackt smiled.

Chacha nodded.

Gackt wrapped his arms around his lover's slender waist, pulled him close and made Chacha full out flush when he slipped his hands into the back pockets of Chacha's jeans.

"I think you look great in them," he said softly, kissing his lover's plush cherry lips. "You should keep them."

Chacha buried his face in Gackt's shoulder,  letting his long hair cascade over the two of them, both in an attempt to hide his blush and to get closer to the man who had never been anything but sweet and caring to him.

Despite Gackt's reassurance, however, Chacha was still convinced that something needed to be done about his weight. He wasn't getting any younger and sooner rather than later, he was pretty sure that his metabolism was going to give up on him.

It was for this reason that Chacha found himself forcing down a sour but otherwise tasteless grapefruit for breakfast the following morning.

After all, for sophisticated men like Gackt, who had tastes for perfection, slenderness was undoubtedly an appreciated quality in a romantic partner.

The thought of how urgent it then was to keep himself slim made Chacha's measly serving of grapefruit all the more hard to swallow.

Oh, her eyes, her eyes, make the stars look like they're not shining
Her hair, her hair, falls perfectly without her trying
She's so beautiful, and I tell her every day

Yeah, I know, I know, when I compliment her she won't believe me
And it's so, it's so, sad to think that she don't see what I see
But every time she asks me do I look ok, I say...
 

Chacha groaned in frustration as he poked and prodded at his reflection in the vanity mirror of his and Gackt's bedroom.

Wrinkles.

He had wrinkles.

This wasn't really surprising, seeing as Chacha was fifty-two. But the loss of peachy plumpness and elasticity of his skin devastated him even more than his "weight concerns".

In desperation, Chacha scanned the various bottles of skin care products that he had laid out on the wood of the vanity set. There had to be something that could restore his skin, even though he'd already slathered on several layers of serum, lotion and thick cream.

"Aren't you coming to bed?" Gackt's low voice soothed the older man for a moment.

Chacha sighed, but looked up into the mirror as Gackt's strong arms fit around his waist. The kiss that Gackt placed on his shoulder, exposed as his silk robe was slipping a little, brought a smile to Chacha's lips.

His smile quickly fell, however, as he took note of his "old-looking" skin.

"What's the matter?" Gackt asked, dabbing little kisses along Chacha's neck in an efffort to relieve some of his obvious tension.

"I'm almost sixty..." Chacha said in a small voice, his gaze dropping to his stomach, where Gackt's hands rested.

He had fit his own hands loosely on top of Gackt's and he couldn't help but to worry about wrinkles forming on his hands, or liver spots...and varicose veins on his legs, sagging, sallow skin...

He'd look like an old hag while Gackt, who was fourteen years younger than him, would still be as good-looking as ever.

Why would Gackt ever want to stay with him?

"Hey, Yuki-chan, look at me," Gackt prodded gently, taking note that his lover looked as though he was about to cry.

"What's bothering you, baby?" Gackt tried again, leading his very sad-looking lover to sit down on their bed.

Chacha couldn't do anything but to fix his gaze on his and Gackt's joined hands. He didn't really want to share his worries- they sounded stupid to him, as he imagined explaining why he was so sad to Gackt. He was supposed to be self-assured and comfortable with himself, not worried about his relationship and his looks like a school girl.

Gackt smiled and reached up to undo Chacha's ponytail, letting his shiny, silk hair that he'd taken the pains to curl, bounce voluminously over his shoulders. He could tell that Chacha didn't really want to talk about it, at least not yet, but he was determined to make Chacha feel better.

Chacha felt his cheeks heat up as Gackt's hand rested on his thigh and pushed up his robe, but he closed his eyes and gladly surrendered to the blissful intimacy that bloomed from the tender gesture. He didn't want to think about Gackt leaving him and he tried to focus only on the wonderful sensations and soft reactions that Gackt drew from his ever-responsive body.

But it was only after they were done, when Chacha was curled up in Gackt's arms, that the awful thoughts began to invade his mind again.

He wasn't going to be as beautiful as Gackt thought he was forever, and Gackt would soon become less and less attracted to him, before realizing that he could do better and leaving Chacha, entirely.

Tears stung Chacha's pretty eyes as he thought of the tender massage that Gackt had administered on his lower back so that he wouldn't be too sore the following morning. He loved Gackt so much and there was nothing that he feared more than losing him. He knew Gackt loved him, too and he certainly gave the younger man more credit that just leaving him...but it seemed inevitable.

Feeling cold all of a sudden, Chacha snuggled closer to Gackt and slipped into a shallow, troubled sleep.

Her lips, her lips, I could kiss them all day if she let me
Her laugh, her laugh, she hates but I think it's so y
She's so beautiful, and I tell her every day

Oh, you know, you know, you know, I'd never ask you to change
If perfect's what you're searching for then just stay the same
So, don't even bother asking if you look ok
You know I'll say...

"Hey Gakku? Did you and Chacha have an argument or something?" 

One of Gackt's technical assistants approached him after a long, hard day of recording, practice and planning, for everyone knew that Gackt and Chacha were in love.

Gackt frowned in confusion.

"No...how come?"

"Well...he looked like he was going to cry, all day today. And he just seems so out of it..."

Gackt took in the observation, feeling extremely concerned for his lover. Being so busy with their respective tasks at the studio kept them apart, or their attention, not focused on each other. He hadn't noticed if Chacha was alright or not- he hadn't been able to.

Immediately, he put down the schedule that he'd been reviewing and went to go find Chacha.

His search led him to his dressing room, where Chacha was taking care of his things, as usual. With his thoughts completely occupied with the awful possibility of Gackt leaving him for someone younger and more attractive and even with his own fears about his increasing age, he didn't even notice Gackt in the room. He kept crying softly- crying as he had wanted to, all day. He didn't want to get older, yet with each passing day, it felt as though his body was aging more and more out of his control. He wasn't just scared about Gackt leaving him. He was scared about aging, itself- losing his looks, the shape of his body, his long, well cared for hair...

Everything that Gackt loved about him.

And he was afraid about getting closer and closer to inevitable death.

Not able to repress anymore of his anxieties, he started crying harder, tears freely flowing down his ivory cheeks.

When a familiar pair of strong arms wrapped around his waist, he jumped in surprise, but even after he recognized that it was Gackt, he couldn't stop crying. If anything, he only cried harder.

"Shh...baby, don't cry..." Gackt's calm exterior failed to betray his inner panic. He'd never seen Chacha cry so hard, even in the ten years that they had been together.

"What's wrong?" Gackt asked him with nothing but tenderness in his voice, after Chacha had calmed down a little. 

"...I-I'm g-getting o-old...and ug-ugly....a-and you're g-going to leave me...b-because I-I won't... b-be p-pretty...a-anymore..." Chacha blubbered, feeling like an idiot for not being able to form a more coherent sentence.

With a kiss, Gackt silenced him, kissing him more and more deeply until Chacha was on his lap, still sniffling softly.

"I love you, Yukihiro," Gackt said, in a serious and genuine tone. "I love you and nothing will ever change that. You don't think I'm attracted to you just because of how you look, do you? You're the one I love, really...I should be worried about you leaving me," he added with a chuckle, as he tucked a lock of his lover's dyed auburn hair behind his ear.

"I'd never leave you," Chacha said, throwing his arms around Gackt's neck.

"We're both getting old, baby," Gackt reflected, as he returned his lover's embrace.

"Yeah, but you're not that old," Chacha sighed, snuggling into Gackt's shoulder. "I wish I was forty again..."

"You're like fine wine," Gackt smiled, kissing Chacha deeply. "You're a delicacy when you're young but you keep getting better with age."

Chacha giggled, slapping Gackt's chest half-heartedly for his cheesiness. Still, he blushed and his stomach fluttered.

"Come on," Gackt grinned, taking his lover's hand. "I'm taking you out for dinner...just like our first date."

When I see your face, there's not a thing that I would change
Cause you're amazing, just the way you are
And when you smile, the whole world stops and stares for a while
Because girl you're amazing, just the way you are 

Thanks for reading! :)

x Angela