Life is not a piece of cake..

Not all memories were happy.

I was busy reading stories in my laptop when my brother came. Stress was clearly written all over his face. The confident demeanor could not be seen nor the playful twinkle in his eyes.

It was obvious something was bothering him and I think I know what it is.

We were growing. We are expected to mature. We were expected to think before we act. But uri little Jjongie is not yet prepared for that. He is still in the phase of being childish. And all the changes in high school plus pressure to be good in school was not helping him.

I tried being a good noona. I played his favorite music. but that was all that I could do. I didn't know how to make him smile but...

 

"Noona thank you for being here for me. For trying to understand methough I always play pranks on you, though I disrespect you at time, though I am not the best brother"

I wanted to cry but I did not.

"Don't be sad Hyun-ah. Were fair anyway 'cause I'm not the best noona you could have. My patience could be short, I am short, I am not good in drawing, and a lot more flaws."

And in that little moment we both smiled and hugged each other. At the back of my mind, I was hoping that I really made him happy.

We ended up singing to let the stress out. Jonghyun had always possessed the beautiful tone in his voice. He sings like an angel. But he never sings in public. He only sings around me and our mom.

As we were singing I saw that this make him happy so I asked

"Hyun why not try singing?"

"N-n-noona? but...."

"But what? Your good at it anyway"

"Noona do you know anything?"

"what do you mean?"

"You really don't know right? you're not playing around?"

"What? I don't get what you mean?"

"Noona can I trust you with a little secret?"

"Sure"

"I'm in a band with my friends?"

"Bwo?? chincha?"

"Yup..i learned playing guitar and my friends and i are now forming a band"

"is that why you come home late?"

"Neh"

"Do you have a guitar?" He's eyes widened.

"How did you know? I don't even bring it home'

"Got you! Is that why you werent eating properly at school? Did you save for that?"

"Neh"

"So you really want music..neh?"

"Neh noona...it makes me feel free..and there's no math hahaha"

"You should have told umma though"

"I'm afraid noona. What if they stop me? I can't"

"Do you really think of umma that way? Don't you see she also wants what's best for you, for us and she considers what we want. You should tell her Hyun. So that you can take on a bigger dream"

"You think so noona? But I'm still scared"

"I'll back you up"

"Chincha? you'll do that noona?" There goes the puppy face

"Ofcourse...but let me watch you first"

"Sure noona! Go to our practice tomorrow"

"What's your alibi this time"

"I'll tell mom we have a school activity..that was my plan? better suggestions?"

"I'll tell her i'll take you out for snacks"

Bear hug. "Thanks noona"

"C-c-an't breath"

"Oh sorry. but really thanks noona"

"Aigoo finally you're not shy to perform" And I ruffled his hair

"Yah noona not my hair! well honestly..i'm till apprehensive about performing on stage but i'll conquer it"

"Thats our Jonghyun! hwaiting!"

 

And I watched him play with twinkle in his eyes. Our mom supported him like how i thought it would be.

"Jonghyun-ah why not try for SM?"

"Umma?"

"Why not Hyun-ah? Your voice is really great. I bet you'd get there. Don't just play the bass and be in the background. Take on the spotlight"

And Jonghyun hugged our umma. Such a nice sight..and so I joined them.

 

From sad little moments to his secret dream.

Now he conquers the stage!