“Hyung,” Sungmin says, on an afternoon where magically only Sungmin has no schedules to go to, eyes fixes on Kangin showing no emotion. “How is it like being in the army?”. Kangin looks into Sungmin’s foxy eyes, try to find any meaning behind it. Out of the blue? “It’s pretty fun, actually. But I’d rather be spending time with you guys here.” Kangin smiles, but quickly changes to a confused expression, seeing the way Sungmin frowns slightly, but hums non-chalantly. “Will I be lonely?” Kangin sees something flickers in Sungmin’s eyes, but the latter expertly hides it away. “Maybe. But I don’t think you will. You’ll make lots of friends there.” Kangin tries to cheer up the boy by patting his back. Sungmin remains silent. Kangin still doesn’t notice it.

~***~

“Yah,”

“Yes, hyung?” Kangin looks up to the leader’s worried expression.

“Is Sungmin okay? He looks weird nowadays.” Kangin scrunches up his eyebrows. “Really?”

“I know so. He’s very distant, even to Hyukjae too.”

“I’ll try talking to him, then.”

“Try not to be so awkward with him.”

“Shut up.” Kangin practically feels Teukie-hyung’s smirk on his back. He shivers slightly, hating the piercing gaze and tries hardly to ignore it.

~***~

Kangin walks downstairs to the 11^th dorm and stands in front of Sungmin’s room just to check up on him, frankly surprised to find the latter’s room with the light still on.­­ He knocks on the door quietly, thinking Hyukjae or Kyuhyun might be in the room, accompanying sleeping Sungmin, but Sungmin's voice cut off his mind. “Come in.”

“Sungmin-ah?” Kangin peeks in Sungmin’s room just in time to see Sungmin reading a book. ‘He usually sleeps earlier than this.’

“Yes, hyung? Is something the matter?”

“No, it’s just….Are you okay?”

“Of course. Better than ever.” Sungmin smiles. Kangin holds his gaze. Sungmin’s answer sounds weird in his ears. He tries again.

“Are you feeling sick nowadays, Sungmin-ah?”

“No, but I feel tired frequently hyung. Just lack of sleep.” Sungmin yawns, closing his eyes and covering his wide-open mouth.

 ‘Weird.’ Kangin thinks. Sungmin have always had enough sleep no matter how tight his schedule is.

“Go to sleep now, then. You look very tired.”

“Thanks, hyung. Goodnight.” ‘He always asks Hyukjae to come sleep with him. Oh well, I can ask him tomorrow.’ Kangin lets Sungmin be to rest well.

~***~

“Hyung?” Kyuhyun pops his head to see Kangin reading the news. “Yes?”

“I need to talk to you.” Kyuhyun seems to sound nervous, so it might be serious. Kangin puts down the paper and looks into Kyuhyun’s eyes. Kangin waits for Kyuhyun to continue. After what seems to be centuries for Kangin, Kyuhyun finally opens his mouth, “I don’t think Sungmin’s doing well these days.”

“Why do you say that?” Kangin looks the sincerely worried dongsaeng. “He lacks of sleep.” He opens his mouth to say something but Kyuhyun cut him off. “He daydreams all the time, he barely listens to what manager-hyung has to say, his dancing ability decreases, though he still catches all the moves, but that worries all of us.” Kangin stays quiet, thinking Kyuhyun already finish, but Kyuhyun cuts him off, again, “And… I think he’s barely have any sleep, hyung. “

“Wait. He doesn’t sleep anymore?”Kangin asks worriedly.

“I…think so.” Kyuhyun murmurs.

“How are you so sure?”

“He…barely grinds his teeth during nights like he use to do?” Kyuhyun answers unsurely. Kangin chuckles to that, and Kyuhyun pouts, “I’m serious, hyung! Don’t you remember Heechul-hyung’s story? I’m afraid he’s not sleeping every night!” Kangin stops to that. Maybe Kyuhyun does have a point. “So…why are you telling me this?”

“Talk to him.”

“You can manage yourself.”

“He started being like this ever since that day when his schedule was off. Take responsibility, hyung.” Kangin groans, “I didn’t do anything to harm or, offend him.”

“I know you didn’t, but you may be the cause for him to be like this.”

“Smart mouth you have, dongsaeng.”

“Thank you. It’s an honour.”

“Get out.” Kangin orders and Kyuhyun happily skips away with a controller in his hand.

~***~

“Sungmin-ah.” Kangin sits across Sungmin on his pink bed.

“Yes, hyung?”

“Please, tell me what’s wrong.”

“Nothing’s wrong, hyung I’m perfectly fine.”

“No, you’re not, literally. I can see your dark spots from over here.” Sungmin quickly wipes it off, forgetting about the makeup he puts on. “Gotcha.” Kangin smirks while Sungmin pouts.

“Now, explain.”

“I’m not your maid.”

“Oh, but you are my dongsaeng, and dongsaengs are supposed to be younger. Now, listen to me and explain.”

“I’m perfectly fine, hyung.”

“I can see that you’re not.”

“Quit lying.”

“Look who’s talking. Now let it out or I’ll report this to Hyukjae.”

“Fu—“

“Language, dongsaeng, or I’m calling him right now.” Kangin holds out a cell.

“Please, no.” Sungmin half-pleads and half-snaps. Kangin grins triumphantly.

“I’m….scared.”

“About what?”

“Let me finish, hyung.”

“Okay.”

“….I feel insecure. It’s like I’ll always be a third-wheeler, with Hyukjae and Junsu. I’ll always stand in the back, where I’m not recognize by anybody.”

“Don’t think like that Sungmin-ah. Everyone loves you.”

“Hyung.”

“Sorry.”

“Sometimes, I feel like I’m not needed anymore. I feel invisible between so many people, I hate that feeling. What if I can’t get along in the army?” Kangin opens his mouth to say something but Sungmin holds his hand up. “I hate being invisible. I have 6 hyungs and 6 dongsaengs, of course they’re better than me. But at least I want them to recognize me. You still remember my story with Eeteuk-hyung? It’s hurts, hyung.” Kangin justsighs and hugs Sungmin. “I’m sorry. But you’ll never be abandon. Remember those time you used to hug us, that’s our strength dongsaeng. You lent us your strength while going on strong. I admire you, Sungmin-ah.”

“Thank you, hyung.” Sungmin lets out a weak smile that breaks Kangin’s heart.

~***~

“So that’s what he says.” Kangin announces, staring at the members’ horrified faces, including Hankyung and Kibum whose also video-calling. All rushes to Sungmin’s room, filling him up with kisses and thousands of sorries, even Kibum and Hanjyung sent a text message. Henry and Zhoumi came to visit and left him a kiss on each cheek, owning a cheerful smile from Sungmin.

~***~

From: Sungmin

To: Kangin-hyung

I have never slept better in weeks. Thank you, hyung.

From: Kangin

To: Sungmin

Anytime, dongsaeng.