Happy 21^st Birthday Ji Eun ! It’s a pity you can’t make it tonight but we should definitely go out drinking the next time. Enjoy the rest of your birthday ! (:

xoxo,

Yoo Jin.

It was the night of my 21^st birthday and I was home alone, instead of spending it in a gorgeous blue dress and the new smoky eye shadow my friends had bought for me to party with them in a club. I didn’t know if I was being foolish, or stupid, or maybe just love sick, but I had been waiting for a particular name to appear on screen since the day had begun. Yes. The name of my very popular and extremely talented celebrity boyfriend ---- Jay Park, or ‘J Hubby ♥’, as saved in my phone. But it didn’t.

“What’s new…” I sighed, dumping my phone aside. It’s been a week since we last texted, two weeks since he last called and more than two months since I’ve last saw my 11^th month boyfriend. Oh wait, does that mean he’s my 9^th month boyfriend then ? I don’t even think I see him for more than nine days a month anyway. But then again, that’s what you get when your celebrity boyfriend is the one and only Jay Park, preoccupied with working on an album and maintaining his body to show it off to his fans rather than his girlfriend on the current overseas New Breed showcase he’s been embarking on. On top of that, the endless calls requesting for him to appear on variety shows, radio shows and magazine photo shoots would end up taking most of his time whenever he’s back in Korea. No, scratch that. He spends more time with his dancers then he does with me. Yes, I’m being jealous. I’m jealous of how his female dancers and him get paired up, how they get complimented as a ‘really matching couple’. …but that’s his job, that’s what he likes to do, and I’ve got to respect that. I slumped on the couch, picked up the stack of notes that I had been previously studying and half-heartedly flipped through it.

After about half an hour of unproductive reading, my phone rang. It was ‘Know Your Name’ that was playing, and not the usual custom ringtone. And that was enough for me to turn into a smiling idiot.

“Annyeong !” I chirped with hints of aegyo.

“Ji Eun ! God, you had no idea how much I missed you babe,” He said, sounding slightly relieved. “Are you home ?”

I grinned, “Mhmm ! You coming over ?” 

“Mm…give me an hour or two ? I just touched down at the airport after a showcase in Singapore, have to be at the office to settle some stuff before coming over,” He explained.

“Sure, I’ll wait for you,” I replied with a tinge of disappointment at the realization of how far we’ve drifted to the extent that I was no longer aware of his schedules any longer.

“Awesome, see you in a bit. Love you !” He replied, before blowing a kiss and ending the call.

Oh well, at least I’m seeing him again, and I’m spending my birthday with him. That’s all the matters, I thought.

I gathered my notes, put them into a neat pile and picked up my stationeries that were strewn all over the living room carpet before heading towards the kitchen to whip something up for dinner. He probably hadn’t had his dinner yet. Maybe a surprise for him would be nice since we haven’t seen each other for two months, and the last time I cooked for him back then didn’t turn out too pretty. Standing in front my refrigerator I stared at the racks of chocolates and other junk foods till I spotted some kimchi and essential ingredients needed for making some stew and started working on it right away. My culinary skills had improved tremendously and without much difficulty, it took me a good one hour till I was satisfied with the taste and decided to leave it in the pot. Now all that’s left is for Jay to come, I smiled, getting excited at the thought.

The sound of numbers being punched in to unlock the door was heard shortly after and it sent me scurrying to the living room.

“Jay !” I squealed in excitement and ran towards him giving him a bear hug as he stepped into the house, put his coat on the coat hanger and took his shoes off.

He chuckled, lifted me slightly off the ground and pinned me on the nearest wall. Then, he whispered, “Shh, we don’t want your neighbours finding out about us, do we ?”

I shook my head, eyes fixated on him, soaking myself in this unreal reality. I missed him. I missed his voice, his deep brown eyes and that gentle yet charming smile. “I’m sorry, I forgot. I…I just…I missed you, J-jay. Really…” I croaked, tears starting to fill my eyes.

No words spoken, and all it took was for his lips to crash mine before my tears spilled and rolled down my cheeks. “You silly, why are you crying the moment you see me ?” He said when we pulled away for some air, momentarily flustered as he wiped my tears. “Stop crying you idiot.”

I smiled and we walked over to the couch. He the television while my hands massaged his shoulders, doing their best to soothe his stiff muscles.

“Hungry ?” I asked, getting excited at the thought of surprising him with better tasting food after our breakfast nightmare the previous time.

“You bet,” He replied with a groan. “Let’s call some pizza ! I’ve been craving for it since I got on the plane.”

With that, he hopped off the couch and started dialing for the delivery.

“B-but Jay-“ I tried to talk but was cut off when he placed a finger on my lips, signaling for me to keep quiet while he waited for the other end to pick up.

“Oh hi,” He chirped. “I would like a large Pepperoni pizza and two orange sodas. Yup that’s it. Oh ! Hold on. Can I have some chicken wings too ? Yeah. Great that’ll be awesome, thank you. Here’s the address…”

Eh ? Pepperoni ? But…I don’t…eat pepperoni…

I remained on the couch, watching him dejectedly. Spending two months apart does great wonders, huh.

“Done !” He announced happily and jumped back on the couch, and it was then that he probably noticed a change in my expression. “What’s the matter…?”

“…nothing,” I replied, quickly covering it up with a smile. Maybe he’s been too busy with work and had better things to remember rather than my fussy food choices, I should I understand that I guess…

“Mm, do you have some studying to do ?” He asked.

I nodded, “Yup, I’ve got a test next week so…”

“Great ! ‘Cos I’ve some work to do too so I was afraid you’d be bored or something if you were to just watch me,” He said, looking seemingly relieved as he took out his Mac Book from his backpack. “Then we can be productive together !”

Work ? Again ? On my birthday after not seeing you for two months ? I eyed him, wondering if it was a prank he was trying to play on me, “But you just came back…”

“BUT there’s still my mix tape to work on…” He replied coolly.

“…right,” I nodded.

With that, he sat in a corner of the living room with his headphones on, his eyes not leaving the computer screen. And I thought he came over for my birthday, not work. Or…had he forgotten ?

It didn’t take long before the pizza arrived, and Jay happily received it from the door. “Dinner’s here,” He announced after he made the payment and closed the door behind him. “C’mon babe !”

I dragged my feet to the dining table and sat across him. I sipped on my soda, nibbling on a chicken wing while he chomped down slice after slice of pizza. “Is something wrong ?” He asked, probably noticing how I wasn’t really eating anything.

“No…n-not really. Just um…” I paused. “I’ve got some stew in the pot, you want some ?”

“Stew ?” He asked, his fingers clean before taking another slice. “No thanks, I’m really sick of it.”

Subconsciously, my lips turned into a tight line, my almost non-existent appetite totally ruined by now. “Oh it’s alright then, I was just asking…” I replied, then left the table.

“Must be her period,” I heard him mumble, and I just sighed.

Just like that, he continued working on his music while I continued flipping through my notes aimlessly after dinner was done, all the way till late in the night. Other than using the toilet, getting some drinks or snacks, Jay’s eyes were glued onto his laptop’s screen, his head moving to the beat of his new songs.

I sighed, it was 11:55pm now, 5 more minutes till the end of my birthday…and my boyfriend has perhaps, maybe, probably, or totally forgotten about it. I was disappointed, honestly. I knew he was busy, busy with music, his showcase, his schedules, but nevertheless, don’t I have a place somewhere in his mind too ? I packed up my notes and stationeries, not wanting to watch him work and ignore me any longer, just like what he has been doing for the past 2 hours.

But just as I stood up and was about to leave the living room, he took off his headphones and asked, “Baby, what do girls like to receive on their birthdays ?”

Birthdays ? Oh finally, I thought, feeling a small smile creeping on my lips again.

“Mm, they’d probably like some time with their boyfriends,” I replied, hinting at him. “It doesn’t have to be big extravagant gifts, a hug or a card or something alone those lines would suffice I guess. It’s the thought that counts anyway !”

“Hmm…boyfriends…” He said, as if in deep thought. “But she doesn’t have one… Then maybe I should just do her a card…”

I stared at him for a few good seconds, not quite getting what he said, “………huh ?”

“Oh it’s Ji Hye’s birthday in a few days’ time. You know, the female dancer you met the other time, working with Big Bang’s Taeyang as well,” He explained casually, popping my happy bubble.

“…Yeah I know her. You might want to buy her some flowers too, make a really pretty card and then take some photos together and post them on twitter. I bet your fans would love seeing the both of you together,” I replied, hints of disappointment and jealously mixed in my tone as I felt angry tears start to fill my eyes.

“Ji Eun…? What’s the matter with you ?” Jay asked, apparently shocked by my words, probably because I’ve never exactly flared up at him before. “What’s with your angst and jealously all of a sudden ? Just because I’m getting a girl a present for her birthday ?”

“Angst ? Oh trust me I wouldn’t be like that if you could be a bit more thoughtful,” I argued. With that, I walked off, making my way to my bedroom and slammed the door shut.

“What the hell, Ji Eun ?” I heard him raise his voice to a volume I’ve yet to encounter in our 11 months of being together. “It’s not like I wouldn’t do that for your birthday, why are you being such a…ugh !”

What ? A ? Is that it ? But that’s precisely because you didn’t, Jay. You couldn’t remember my birthday, let alone preparing a gift.

I wrapped the blanket around myself, buried my face in a pillow and let it soak up my tears. I was hurt by his words, honestly,  and perhaps a little jealous. So coming over on my birthday was just a coincidence ? Ouch. There he was asking me about another girl’s birthday that would fall a few days later while I’m just there waiting like an idiot for him to put his work aside and give me some attention, even if it was for a few minutes, for my birthday that he apparently forgotten about which falls today. Do I mean as much to him as he did to me ?

I remembered. I remembered how you’d call me at least once in two days, even if it were just to ask me how I was doing. You’d tell me you miss me, you’d talk to me about your schedules, tell me interesting stories about your promotional activities. When you were busy and unable to pick up my calls, you’d at least reply my text within the same day after your schedule when you were too tired to call back.

I curled into a ball in the corner of my bed, my tears still flowing. Yes, a very crybaby person I am. Then, insecurities filled my mind. Did I really blow the matter out of proportion ? I sighed, picking up a framed picture of him on stage from my bedside table. “Was I being selfish, Jay ? Trying to please your fans and date behind their backs at the same time…it’s difficult…isn’t it…”

I spent the next half an hour in the comfort of the sheets on the bed, feeling guilty yet at the same time unhappy. I had my ear phones plugged in, listening to ‘Girlfriend’ on repeat on my iPod, occasionally letting out a bitter smile as I listened to the sweet lyrics. Jay had probably already left, I reckon, since there were no sounds at all coming over from outside the room. “Best birthday ever…” I sighed.

Just then, I felt a pair of arms hug me from behind, startling me. My eyes widened briefly and as I felt his warm breath on the back of my neck send chills down my spine, I gently pried his fingers off my tummy, my back still facing him and as if on cue, tears brimmed my eyes again.

He pulled out the earphone on one side of my ear. “I’m sorry,” He said. “…for flaring up at you just now.”

I remained quiet, trying to control my tears and hide my pathetic looking face from his.

“Baby…” He persisted. “C’mon, look at me will you ? I’m sorry…”

“You don’t have to apologise for the sake of apologizing,” I stated, pulling the blanket over the head. “I’m not mad at the fact that you for raised your voice at me.”

“E-eh ?” He responded, sounding surprised. “Did you want us to go out together then ? Did I miss something ? I see you’ve picked out an amazing blue dress… ”

Then, I felt his weight leaning against my body as he probably reached for something on the bedside table beside me. “Let’s see, what’s the date today hmm,” He tried saying it cutely in attempt to lift my mood, probably with my calendar in hand, but he did just otherwise. “18^th…18^th… Right, 18^th January. It’s…O-OH…! A-ah…I…I’m sorry I-”

I sighed, sitting up from my bed then turning towards him to grab the calendar from his hand. “You know what ? Forget it, forget it, because my 21^st birthday is over and it’s never coming back,” I replied, throwing the calendar into the bin. “It doesn’t matter anymore so just go and work on your music, isn’t that what you’d prefer doing ?”

“H-hey…!” He grabbed my wrists that I tried to shrug off but obviously failed because of his strong grip. “I’m sorry, I really am. I was so caught up with work, the showcase, the album, the upcoming tour…you know it’s just been crazy it just slipped my mind especially since I had a crazy day today at the showcase in Singapore and then a flight back. I-“

“Jay Park,” I spoke, and that meant something because I don’t usually call him by his full name. “The day’s over. A meaningless day is over. It’s fine, j-just…go get busy with whatever you need to do.”

“But b-baby…” He tugged gently at my arm, turning me around to face him. “I’ll make it up to you, okay ? Forgive me, please… We can go out for a drink now if you’d like, all dressed up and stuff. How about that ?”

“I rejected my friends to party at a club, Jay. They asked me out because it was my birthday, but I thought it’d be nice to spend it with you, so I rejected their invitation. B-but you…” I explained, my voice eventually betraying me as it started cracking. “I-I…know I’m being…irritating, ranting on and on, looking like and you’re just gonna call me an idiot for crying again but I…I was just d-disappointed, Jay. It’s just…I really…m-missed you…and I just thought that we could…-“

That was as far as I could go before I started becoming incoherent, and he simply silenced me by crashing his lips against mine. “I’m sorry,” He murmured against my lips and after a while carried me towards the bed, his lips never leaving mine. His tongued shyly begged for entrance, and he dominated once I granted it to him.

Our breathing gradually became uneven and we pulled away reluctantly, our eyes never leaving one another’s. “Am I forgiven now ?” He asked in a raspy voice, panting slightly.

I remained silent and stared into his eyes as my heart pounded loudly, the tears on my cheeks dried up by now. It’s been a long time since we have had a moment like this. A moment that belonged to us and us only. Without a word, I reached for his face, my hand caressing his left cheek, my thumb gently brushing his lips. His face was a milky white and his lips a bright pink, as alluring as his charming single eyelids. I missed him. I missed everything about him. Even his scent. And with that, I nuzzled his neck, remaining silent.

“Are you done with your work ?” I murmured against his neck, not answering his question.

“I’m done, I’m done,” He replied softly, his voice filled with remorse as his fingers combed through my hair.  He brought his lips to my forehead, then whispered, “I’m sorry…and happy belated birthday, babe.”

& I slept in his arms that night. 

A/N: Edited the ending. Thanks for reading and commenting ! :>