lolz ^^

Yukari was emotional when I met her at the bus stop after school on Wednesday.  Tears were gathered at the corners of her wide eyes, and her shoulders were trembling.

She pulled me into a sudden hug once I’d approached her.

“Oh, Seungmi,” she whimpered.  “It’s the last day of classes!  The year is over.  I don’t want to go back to Japan!  I will miss everyone here so much.”

I rubbed her back in sympathy.  “It’s okay,” I soothed.  “I know how you feel.  It is sad.  I cried in my Korean class this morning.”

She sniffled against my shoulder.

“But, you said it yourself,” I added.  “Korea is not our home.  You belong back in Japan, and I belong back in…America.”

The word felt like a brick sliding down my throat.  I winced slightly.

“We’ll always be best friends, right?”  Yukari leaned away from me and dabbed at the corners of her eyes.  A bit of her sparkly eyeliner smudged onto her cheek.

I blinked at her for a moment, and then my features softened into a smile.  “Of course,” I replied warmly.  “I’ll come to Japan someday, or you can come back to America, too.  Come vacation in Florida.”

Yukari giggled slightly as she still gingerly wiped her eyes.  “I definitely will,” she said.  “And, maybe we can come back to Seoul sometime and visit SHINee again!  I’m sure you’ll be back…with the baby.”

My eyes drifted down to the ground.  “Yeah, that’s right,” I muttered.  “Whoever the baby belongs to, I’m sure he’ll want to see his child from time to time.”

I shamefully shook my head again and ran a hand through my brown hair. 

“Speaking of the baby,” Yukari said, regaining her composure.  “Are you excited for today?”

I rolled my eyes as she and I took a seat on the bench again.  “More like nervous,” I replied.  “I just want to get it over with.”

Today was my first prenatal appointment –at four o’clock sharp– and we were waiting for the bus route that would take us to the Seoul National University Hospital.  Yukari was going with me.

“Don’t be nervous!”  She gently nudged my shoulder.  “Think about all the new and exciting things you’ll learn today.”

“That’s what school is for,” I muttered sourly.  “You learn new things in school.”

The bus we needed was arriving at the stop now,

“Well, school’s over,” Yukari said as she rose to her feet.  “So, just be excited for this now, okay?  Let’s go!”

She enthusiastically yanked me into the line of Koreans waiting to board the bus, and I stumbled along after her.

Be excited for this baby?!

How could I be?

How could I be excited about it…when so much was at stake?  So many things could go wrong now because of this baby.

Visions of Key’s pretty face and visions of Minho’s handsome face tormented me for the entire trip to the hospital.  I wanted to hit my head repeatedly against the glass window.

========================================================================

December twenty-second.

That was my due date.

On the cold, frigid twenty-second day of December, just eight short months from now, I would carry a brand-new life into this world.

A brand-new life that I would be solely responsible for.

When the obstetrician calculated my due date, Yukari gasped and happily clapped her hands together like a child.  I merely stared vacantly at the doctor, as if his words had not fully registered with me.

“Did you hear that, Seungmi?” Yukari cried, taking my hands in hers.  “December!  Your baby will be here in December!  A Christmas baby; how sweet.  Oh, I can’t believe it, I can’t believe it!”

She continued to ramble on giddily, but I wasn’t listening.  I had completely tuned her out and instead, stared at the white wall of this examination room.  New wheels were turning in my head.  An eerie suspicion crept along my spine.

“E-excuse me, Dr. Shim?” I timidly asked.

He looked up from the paperwork he was reviewing about my medical history.  “Yes?”

Yukari suddenly piped down and locked her piercing dark eyes upon me, and I suddenly felt very self-conscious about this question.

But, it was a question that needed to be asked.  It could be the answer to everything.

“If my due date is eight months from now,” I slowly said.  “And, I’ve been pregnant for a month now…is there any way to calculate my exact date of conception?”

I hoped the doctor could understand my contorted Korean; medical language was, of course, much more difficult than just casual, everyday language.

The obstetrician folded his hands and gazed curiously at me.  “There’s no exact way of knowing, just like there’s no exact way of predicting your due date,” he explained.  “It’s all an estimate.  Is your conception date important to you for some reason?”

Yes! I shouted in my head.  Depending on when I conceived, I will have a pretty good guess for who the father is!

But, all I said to the doctor was the simple word, “Yes.”

“I see.”  He rubbed his chin and looked over my information once again.

Yukari and I exchanged nervous glances.

“Well,” Dr. Shim said after a tense moment.  “The most accurate estimate I can provide is that your baby was conceived sometime around the twenty-fifth of March.  About three weeks ago.  Does that answer your question?”

My hand clapped over my mouth to silence my large gasp.  Yukari wasn’t exactly sure why I was shocked, but she quickly said, “Yes, I think it most certainly does.”

I vigorously nodded my head.  “Yes, thank you so much,” I replied, almost in tears.  “It…it answers so many questions.”

The obstetrician leaned back in his chair and eyed me suspiciously.  “Ms. Seungmi,” he began hesitantly.  “I’m not making any accusations, but…if you are, in fact, unsure about the father of your child, there are paternity tests we can do while you’re pregnant.  They are rather expensive, though, and carry slight risk to the child.”

Slight risk?!  No way.

I shook my head.  “No, sir,” I replied.  “That won’t be necessary.  Your information is useful enough for me.”

“But, it may not be accurate,” he reminded me, and I smiled.

“I’ll take my chances.”

The appointment ended before long.  After a short, yet rather awkward pelvic exam, the doctor gave me prescriptions for prenatal vitamins and then sent us on our way.  Yukari and I hurried back out in the crisp, white hallway of the hospital.

Once there, I breathed a huge sigh of relief and stumbled over to the nearest wall, catching myself on it and leaning against it for support.  My knees felt weak from the revelation I’d just experienced.

“Seungmi.”  Yukari approached me and fanned me with the piece of paper that held my presciption for the vitamins.  “Are you alright?  Your cheeks are flushed.  What happened in there?  Why did you get so shocked like that?”

I opened my heavy eyes and gazed at my cute friend.  She was still waving the paper in my face, and the cool air felt good against my cheeks.

“Yukari,” I murmured, glancing around at the other people passing by in the hallway.  My voice dropped to a low, hushed tone.  “It’s Minho.”

“Minho?” Yukari repeated, and then she gazed around the busy hospital, as well.  “Where?”

“No, stupid!” I hissed.  “He’s not here.  He’s…”  My eyes suddenly grew as wide as balloons as I spotted a figure down the hallway.  “Taecyeon.”

“What?!”  Yukari was frowning at me.  “Minho is Taecyeon?  Seungmi, are you going bananas?  Because I think—”

“Quick, hide!” I told her before grabbing her arm and pulling her around the corner and into the nearby waiting room where we had sat earlier.

“What’s going on?” Yukari whispered from behind me as I poked my head back around the corner.

The handsome member of 2PM was still walking this way, talking and laughing into a cell phone.  My heart raced behind my chest.

“Taecyeon is here,” I said quietly.  “He’s coming this way.  He and Key are like brothers, you know.  If Taecyeon sees me, then he’ll definitely tell Key.”

“Why is here, anyway?” Yukari whispered as she popped her head around the corner, as well.  “Especially in the obstetrics department.”

“Don’t ask me,” I muttered.

We continued to spy on Taecyeon as he approached the waiting area.  I watched with wide eyes and a pale face as he passed right by us and headed into the large, open room, walking towards the vending machines against the far wall.

“He’s getting a snack,” Yukari whispered, as if I couldn’t see for myself.

Taecyeon hung up his cell phone and I watched as he shoved some money into the candy machine and waited patiently for his food to appear.

“Come on, let’s just act natural,” I told Yukari.  “We definitely look like stalkers right now.”

“Got it,” she replied.

The two of us began to casually walk across the waiting room and back towards the hallway where the elevator to the ground floor was located.  We had almost made it back to the hallway before Taecyeon began his journey across the room again.

“He’s coming this way!” Yukari gasped.

“Run!” I said.

I had just shifted my weight forward to run when a deep, pretty voice called out my name.  “Seungmi?”

My body froze in its place.

“Busted,” whispered Yukari.  She ducked behind me as I grimaced before turning to face Taecyeon.

He approached us at the edge of the waiting room, a Twix bar in his hand and frown creasing his stunning features.

I offered him the best smile I could muster.

“H-hi, Taecyeon,” I sputtered shyly.  “Long time no see.”

“Yeah, hi,” he replied.  His quizzical eyes swept over my body.  “What are you doing here, Seungmi?  This is the…obstetrics area of the hospital.”

“Well, we could ask you the same question!” Yukari piped up from behind me.  “You aren’t exactly a woman.”

“Yah.”  Taecyeon scrunched up his nose.  “My older sister is in labor right now, for your information.  Now, answer my question.  Why are you here, Seungmi?”

A tremor rolled through my body, starting in my fingertips and traveling upwards to my shoulders and into my torso.  I parted my lips to speak, and my shaky voice didn’t even sound like mine.

It sounded much too terrified.

“This is…”  I struggled with the Korean.  “This is my friend, Yukari.  She’s pregnant.”

Taecyeon’s eyes widened at the same time Yukari gasped, “What?!”

But, after one dirty look from me, she composed herself and shot the idol a cute, innocent smile.  “Oh right, right!” she said, waving her hand in the air.  “I just found out I’m pregnant today, actually.  Seungmi was an angel and accompanied me here to the hospital.  Isn’t she just the greatest best friend ever?”

Yukari linked her arm through mine and we put our heads together while grinning at Taecyeon.

His eyes inspected her body before switching back to mine.  He seemed to be examining every detail, as if he could see right through us.  The frown did not leave his face; it only grew deeper, and I began to panic.

Can he really tell the difference?!  I’m only a month along; he shouldn’t be able to tell!  At all!

Finally, Taecyeon took a bite out of his candy bar.  “You guys are weird,” he muttered.  “I gotta go.  My nephew will be here soon.  Good to see you again, Seungmi.  Key…”  He placed his hand on my shoulder.  “Key still talks about you.  Quite a bit.”

The words pierced my heart like an arrow, and my eyes drooped down to the shiny, tile floor below.

“Good luck with your, um, pregnancy,” Taecyeon added to Yukari before he shuffled away from us and started back down the hallway.

I took one last glance over my shoulder, and my heart slid to my feet when I saw Taecyeon making a phone call as he walked away.

There was only one person he would possibly be calling after this incident.

=============================================================================

“What were you going to tell me about Minho?”

Yukari’s question startled me out of my thick haze of thoughts.  I looked away from the dirty bus window and gazed at her sitting beside me.

“What?” I asked.  “I zoned out.”

“In the hospital,” Yukari replied.  “Before Taecyeon showed up, you started to say something about Minho.  What was it?”

The bus hit a bump in the road and everyone bobbled slightly in their seats.  I didn’t even notice the movement.

I simply pinched my lips shut and stared at the seat in front of us as I thought about what exactly I was going to tell Yukari.  It was still unbelievable; almost surreal.  I wasn’t quite sure I could get the words out of my mouth.

“Minho,” I started to say, and his name felt so weird against my tongue.  “Minho is…I’m pretty sure he’s…the father.”

Yukari dropped her iPhone into her pink purse.  “The-the-the…father?!” she sputtered as she pressed her palms against her cheeks.  “Minho is your babydaddy?”

I cringed at her slang.  “Don’t say it like that,” I groaned.  “Makes it sound like I don’t even have a relationship with him.”

“Well, do you?” Yukari asked.

The bus took a wide left turn and I lurched slightly against the cool window behind me.  My eyes never left Yukari’s face as I searched her expression; she was completely serious.

“Of course I do,” I carefully replied.  “Why wouldn’t I?”

“Key.”  That was all she said.

And, that was all it took to make me sick with guilt.  I could practically feel the bile rising in my throat.

“Don’t talk about him right now,” I muttered.  “That’s my private business.”  I stared forlornly out into the evening scenery of Seoul.

“If you say so,” my friend replied with a sigh.  “So, why do you think Minho is the father?”

I sighed, too, and looked away from the window.  “Because of the timing.  Dr. Shim said my baby was most likely conceived around March twenty-fifth.  I wasn’t intimate with Key around that time.  That was the end of spring break, and Minho and I started our relationship around then; a few days before the twenty-fifth.”

“Are you sure?” Yukari asked.  “I mean, how can you remember such small details?”

“It’s not small details,” I replied.  “I haven’t been intimate with Key at all since before spring break, so…of course I remember it.  It was our last time, and it was way before the twenty-fifth.  Nowhere close to it.  So, he couldn’t possibly be the father…right?”

Yukari tugged on her ebony ponytail.  “I don’t know, Seungmi,” she murmured.  “Things can always be off or something.  You know what I mean?”

I stared at my hands in my lap.  “Yeah, I know what you mean,” I said.  “Still…I just have a gut feeling.  Something is telling me…it’s Minho.”

The bus squeaked to a stop just then and Yukari began gathering her things.  I realized this was where we parted ways.  She smiled at me.

“Let me know if you want me to go get those vitamins with you,” she offered as she rose to her feet.  “We can go to the pharmacy tomorrow, and then we could even study Korean together.  The final is Monday, you know.”

I nodded as I watched her leave.  “Thank you for everything,” I sincerely told her.

“Just give me a call tomorrow!”  She waved before stepping off the bus and disappearing into the crowded sidewalk outside.

I waved out of the bus window until we rolled away from view.

=============================================================================

Nuna, you’re so pretty~ Boys won’t leave you alone~ Honestly, I know your shaking feelings~

“Hello?”  I answered my singing cellphone before Onew’s portion of Replay.

“Seungmi.”  Minho’s deep, smooth voice came through the phone.  “Where have you been?  I was worried sick.”

I grimaced slightly and glanced around the crowded elevator I was standing in.  A few Koreans were staring at me after my phone had noisily announced my incoming call.

“Minho,” I murmured, stepping to the back of the elevator and trying to be as quiet as possible.  “I’m in the elevator right now going to the penthouse.  I can’t be too loud.”

“That doesn’t answer my question,” Minho said.  “Where were you?  I called you, like, ten times after I was done with class at four.  You never answered.  It always went to your voicemail.  You think you could give your boyfriend just a slight notice of where you were?  I’ve been up here at SM for the past three hours and I can’t focus at all because I was so worried about you.”

I cringed against the phone and laid my head on the cool, shiny wall of the elevator.  I stared at the large hoop earrings of some teenage girl next to me.

“Minho, I…I’m sorry,” I whimpered.  “I was busy after school.”

Lame excuse, although it was true.  The doctor had asked me to silence my cell phone during my prenatal exam.  How could I have been rude and answered Minho’s calls?

“Busy doing what?” Minho demanded.  His voice seemed to echo in the background, as if he were in a large studio at SM.  I could even hear the voices of crew members and the laughter of Taemin behind him.

“I was with Yukari,” I told him.  “Doing girl stuff.”

“Girl stuff?” Minho repeated skeptically.  “Like what?”

“It’s not girl stuff if I tell a boy,” I muttered.  I was getting slightly exasperated.

“But, you’re alright?” he asked.

“Yes, I’m fine!” I snapped into the phone.  Several people glanced at me.  “Why wouldn’t I be?  I was with Yukari the whole afternoon.”

Minho was silent for a moment.  “Yukari,” he finally said, and his voice was almost hesitant.

I frowned.

“Seungmi, I’ve been doing something thinking and…I don’t know if…”  He struggled for the words.  “I don’t know if Yukari is a good friend.  I mean, I’m trying to say—”

He was interrupted by Taemin yelling “Hyung, hyung!” in the background.

“What are you trying to say?” I asked defensively.  “Yukari is my best friend.  I’m glad to have a girl friend here in Seoul.”

“I know, I know,” Minho replied.  He sighed through the phone and I could almost see him rubbing his temples, fending off his impending headache.  Taemin continued to call ‘hyung’ from a distance.  “I have to go,” he said.  “Just go home and we’ll talk about this later.  Taemin and I have to finish working on some choreography, so…I might not be home until late.  You don’t have to wait up.”

“Whatever,” I muttered before sliding my phone shut and ending the call.

I dropped the stupid thing back into my bag and leaned against the wall of the elevator.  Several people had stepped off of the lift; it wasn’t nearly as crowded now, and I glanced at the digital numbers on the wall.

We were at the sixtieth floor.  Only a little bit longer to go.

With an irritated sigh, I crossed my arms over my chest and stewed about my little altercation with Minho. 

I don’t know if Yukari is a good friend.

My teeth ground together.  Who did Minho think he was?!  He had no right to tell me who I could or could not be friends with.  What a jerk.

About ten minutes later, I had reached the top floor of this gigantic skyscraper and was unlocking the front door to SHINee’s home.  The penthouse was dark and quiet when I stumbled forward into it.  Piles of Jonghyun’s dirty clothes spilling forth from the laundry room were the only things that greeted me.

I felt so tired.  I just wanted to lie down and sleep for the rest of my life.

Unfortunately, my rumbling tummy had other plans for me.  I clutched my growling stomach as I entered Minho’s dark bedroom and threw my stuff down on his bed.

“I’m so hungry,” I whispered painfully.

His digital clock was ticking to seven-thirty.  I hadn’t eaten anything since noon.

I owed myself a meal.  Better yet, I owed my growing baby a meal.

Slipping back out into the hallway, my heart skipped a beat when I noticed yellow light streaming out from underneath Key’s bedroom door.  He was home.

Jonghyun and Onew were home, as well.

I in my breath and tip-toed quietly into the kitchen.

Once there, I stood vacantly in front of SHINee’s large, towering pantry, filled to the brim with mouthwatering food.  I wasn’t even sure what I wanted to eat; my hands just sort of started grabbing items on their own.

Before I knew it, I began cooking a pot of spicy Korean noodles on the stove.  While I waited for it to cook, I chewed up ice cube after ice cube and went in search of peanut butter and anything citrus I could eat.

I was literally like a starving, ravenous animal.

As I was spreading peanut butter on a graham cracker –which was usually a repulsive idea to me– a soft, sultry voice suddenly whispered “Boo~” in my ear.

I nearly stabbed the mystery person with my knife.  “Key!” I snapped when I turned around to lay eyes on him.  “Don’t do that.”

He was smiling his usual beautiful smile.  “Hi, Mimi~” he crooned.  “Whatcha doing?”

“Making dinner,” I replied before turning back to the counters and plucking another ice cube from the glass near my peanut butter jar.  I crunched it up while Key glanced at my dinner on the stove.

“Spicy noodles?” he asked curiously.  “MiMi, you hate spicy foods.  I can barely get you to eat kimchi.  This stuff will make your nose run, it’s so spicy.”

“I know,” I told him as I sliced up pieces of an orange to put on top of my graham cracker layered with peanut butter.  “But, I want it.”

Key watched with a disgusted expression as I popped the entire graham cracker into my mouth, and it became one crunchy-peanut-buttery-orangey glob.  He came to stand behind me and inspected my mess on the counters.

“Since when do you eat oranges, lemons, and limes?” he asked.  “And, peanut butter…all at once?  And, you never chew on ice, either.”  He grabbed my wrist and spun me to face him.  “I know you Americans eat some weird stuff,” he muttered.  “But, this is beyond weird.  Are you sure you’re alright?  You’re not sick or anything, are you?”

My heart thumped.  Can he tell?!

He held my cheeks between his palms and his pretty eyes searched my face, looking for signs of sickness.  I swallowed the snack in my mouth and wrested away from him before reaching for a piece of lemon this time.  I had to have that sour, citrusy taste.  “I’m fine,” I evenly told him.  “I’m just…craving some of these foods, I guess.”

“Craving, huh?”  Key stepped away from me and began rummaging through their vast supply of food.  He gathered vegetables to stir-fry for himself.

Maybe craving was the wrong word to say.  I busied myself with stirring my noodles on the stove.

“That reminds me,” Key said as he began slicing up his food on the counter beside mine.  “Taecyeon called me today; it was about an hour ago, actually.  He said he saw you in the hospital.”

My fingers tightened around the spoon in my hand; so much that my knuckles turned white.

“Y-yes,” I replied, barely audible.  “I saw him there.  He said his sister was in labor.”

“Mhm.  He actually just texted me about ten minutes ago and said she had the baby.”

I took deep, even breaths.  “How nice,” I said.  “They must be very happy.”

“They are,” Key replied.  He turned around halfway to face me, his knife still in his hand.  “You know, MiMi, you’re going to have to think about a baby now, too.”

My spoon clattered to the floor, flinging tiny droplets of boiling hot broth onto my swollen ankles.  I jumped in place.

“W-why do you say that?” I asked as I stooped down to pick up the spoon.  I attempted to control my hysterics as much as possible.

“Well,” Key drawled with a smirk.  “Taecyeon told me that you were there with Yukari, and that Yukari is pregnant.  She’s your BFF, right?  So you better help her through this.”

My nostrils flared as I exhaled with relief.  So, Taecyeon had indeed believed our phony story.  I was safe.

“Oh, you’re right,” I told Key with forced tranquility.  “Sorry, it’s still sort of a shock to me.  We just found out today that she’s pregnant, and you know…since it’s unplanned and everything…”  I trailed off and continued cooking my noodles.  They were almost done.

“Who’s pregnant?”  Jonghyun’s pretty voice suddenly rang out from the hallway.

I snapped my head up and watched as he stepped into the kitchen, balancing a laundry basket on his hip.

“Hyung,” Key said, wrinkling his nose.  “Don’t you think you should wash your dirty clothes that are already on the floor over there before you start a new load?”

“Hey, shut up,” Jonghyun replied as he headed towards the laundry room.  “Seungmi, you didn’t answer my question.  I want to know:  who is pregnant?”

Maybe it was just my imagination, but his eyes seemed to bore into my own; so deeply, as if he could see my very soul.

I flinched back against the counter ever so slightly.  Key was almost done preparing his vegetables.

“Umm.”  I struggled to speak.  “Yukari is pregnant.  You know, my friend from Japan.  She’ll be having a baby in December.”

“Uh-huh.”  Jonghyun set his laundry basket down on the white, marble floor and began scooping up his other piles of dirty clothes.  “So, she’s about a month along?”

I bit my lip as I lowered the temperature on the stove and prepared to pour my noodles into a bowl.  “Yes, about a month,” I replied.  My voice cracked for a split second.

I hoped he couldn’t notice.

As Key shifted his sliced vegetables into a frying pan, Jonghyun straightened upright and boldly met my gaze again.  He thoughtfully twirled a piece of his newly-dyed brown hair with blonde highlights.

“So…”  He blinked at me.  “Does she know who the father is?”

My cheeks immediately reddened and I turned away from Jonghyun to pour my noodles into a bowl that Key handed to me.  He took my place at the stove and began frying his own dinner.

“Jonghyun, that’s…that’s not really your business,” I shyly murmured, hoping it wouldn’t offend him.  “That’s between Yukari and me.”

I angled my head towards him again and he held my eyes with his own.  He wouldn’t let me look away.

“I’m sure it is, Seungmi,” he finally said before turning away.  “I’m sure it is.”

He threw one last glance over his shoulder at me before disappearing inside the laundry room next door.

I released my pent-up breath and leaned back against the counter, where my bowl of noodles was still steaming.  It smelled good, but…suddenly, I wasn’t too hungry anymore.

Jonghyun had made me sick with nerves.  Nerves and guilt.

“Don’t worry about him,” Key said as he turned away from the stove to face me.  The vegetables sizzled and popped behind him.  “He’s just trying to pick on you.  That’s how he is.”

Key’s soft hands slid around my waist and drew me closer to his body.  My throat tightened from the proximity and I swallowed.

“You know, MiMi, I have a few minutes until my dinner is ready,” he whispered in my ear.  “Care to entertain me for those few minutes?”  His warm lips pressed against the sensitive skin directly behind my ear, and my body shivered in his embrace.

I felt him smirk against my skin.

“K-Key,” I breathed through my lips; my lips that ached for his.  “We can’t.  Jonghyun might see—”

My whisper died as Key trailed his lips down my jaw to my collarbone and then back up to my cheek.  “I said don’t worry about him.”

And, with that, Key captivated my lips in a deep, passionate kiss.  He backed me up against the cool counters, still covered with my weird food, and he began administering his sweet, seductive kiss to me.

He expertly worked my lips between his own.

My fingers caressed his shoulders for a moment before sliding up his neck to tangle into his hair.  Key’s fingers massaged small circles against the skin of my hips, and his tongue slid across my lips.

The temperature between us rose rapidly.

“Kibum-ah.”  Onew’s voice suddenly rang out from the hallway.  “Did you talk to manager-hyung about—”

The leader’s voice died as he reached the kitchen just as Key and I were springing away from each other.  He smoothed down his black hair and I fixed my t-shirt, innocently clearing my throat as I did so.

Onew arched his eyebrow curiously and then his eyes cut across the kitchen over towards the front door and the laundry room.

I followed his gaze and jumped out of my skin to see Jonghyun standing there, leaning against the wall with his muscular arms folded across his chest.

My heart pounded frantically.  How long has he been standing there?!  How much did he see?!

Jonghyun’s beautiful eyes left mine and traveled over to Onew, and the two of them seemed to communicate some silent message between them.

I felt double-teamed.

“What was that, hyung?” Key asked he finished up stir-frying his vegetables.  I busied myself with gathering my bowl of noodles, my slices of citrus, and my glass of ice and carrying them to the large kitchen table.

“I was saying,” Onew replied, and his eyes were watching me.  “I was asking if you have talked to manager-hyung about your exam schedule yet.  You have a physics exam on Tuesday, right?  That’s the first day we’re filming our music video, you know.”

“Oh, that’s right,” Key replied.  “I’ll get on that.”

As they continued to discuss their schedule for next week, I pulled out a chair at the table and sat down, attempting to appear invisible as I began eating my dinner.  I tried to distract myself with chowing down, but finally…I couldn’t resist the temptation anymore.

I let my eyes drift back across the expansive kitchen, over towards the laundry room again.

Jonghyun was staring directly back at me.

=============================================================================

“Come on, you stupid thing.”  I puffed out my cheeks and gave a tiny growl as I attempted to fasten my bra behind my back.

To call it small would be an understatement.

My body was transforming so rapidly that my bras barely fit me anymore.  I’d had to struggle into my jeans, as well.

Today was Thursday, only a day after my prenatal visit, and I had called Yukari about an hour ago.  She had agreed to meet me at a nearby pharmacy around two o’clock this afternoon.

Minho was in the shower at this very moment; I hadn’t seen much of him since Tuesday.

He had returned home very late last night –after midnight– and had slept in very late this morning.

Now, I was struggling to get dressed and cover up my puffy body before he could emerge from the shower and question my changing appearance.  It wasn’t easy.

With one last burst of strength, I managed to hook my black bra and I coughed as it constricted around my body like an anaconda.  My cleavage nearly spilled out of the top of it.

The shower water shut off just then and I gave a tiny gasp before yanking open Minho’s dresser drawers and pawing through my stacks of clothes.  I pulled a royal blue t-shirt over my head just as Minho stepped out of the bathroom and into his room.  A cloud of steam followed behind him.

His dark-brown hair stuck to his handsome face, and droplets of water continued to roll down his bare, muscular torso.  They rolled down to the black boxers he already wore around his hips.

He stopped short when he saw me standing there, primped up to leave the penthouse, and he raised an eyebrow at me.  “Going somewhere?” he asked with a small smile.

He trailed his damp hand along my back as he passed by me to get to his side of the dresser.  I turned to face him.

“Actually, I am,” I replied.  “I’m going to study Korean with Yukari.”  Which was only half true.

I saw the muscles in Minho’s grow taut underneath his skin.  He drew a pair of shorts and a t-shirt from his dresser.

“Yukari, huh?” he repeated as he stood upright again.  He turned to face me.  “Why are you studying with her?  I mean…why not ask one of us right here?  We’re all fluent; she’s not.”

“Exactly,” I said.  “It’s easier to study with another foreigner; we understand our issues with the language better than you guys do.  Sometimes, you guys don’t understand why we don’t get something.  It’s simple to you, but not to us.”

I stepped past him and went to stand in front of his mirror so I could apply a ring of black eyeliner to my eyes.

“I guess you have a point,” Minho replied as pulled on his pair of tan shorts.  “But…isn’t there anyone else you can study with?”

I gazed at his reflection in the mirror.  “What’s wrong with Yukari?” I demanded.  “Why can’t I study with her?”

Minho sighed as he pulled his red shirt over his head.  “You can,” he said.  “It’s just…”  He took a seat on his unmade bed and patted the space beside him.  “Come sit with me, Seungmi.”

I capped my eyeliner, left it on top of the dresser, and plopped down next to him.  He took my hands in his own and drew my legs up onto his lap.

His eyes were gentle.

“Seungmi.”  He trailed his fingers down my cheek.  “I know you and Yukari are friends –you two are really good friends– and I’m happy for you, babe.  I really am.  I’m glad you made a friend here outside of SHINee.  But…”

I raised one eyebrow.  “But?”

“But…”  Minho ruffled his damp, brown hair.  “There’s no easy way to say this, Mi, and I certainly don’t want to upset you.  That’s not my intentions, okay?  I just…I’ve been doing some thinking, and it seems to me that Yukari may not be the best person for you to be around.  She may not…have your best interests at heart.”  He finished his words with a wince.

I stared quizzically at him for a moment.  “What do you mean, Minho?” I asked.  “I’m not sure I understand.”

He sighed.  “Of course you don’t,” he muttered.  “Seungmi, think of it like this.  Remember last week when we were in the park, and we both agreed that those gangsters have a spy working for them?  You know, undercover?  It’s the only way they are able to so easily target you.”

I nodded and prompted him to go on.

“Well…”  He nervously scratched his head.  “I did a lot of pondering, and –don’t take this the wrong way or anything–”

“Minho, just spit it out,” I told him.

“Seungmi, I have good reason to believe that Yukari is the spy.”  His words came out in a rush.  “She’s spying on you.”

For a moment, I did not speak.  I did not even move.  I could only stare at Minho, completely aghast at the opinion he’d just stated.  My lips trembled as I attempted to speak, but…no words came out.  No words could be found for this situation.

Minho’s brow wrinkled with worry.  “Seungmi,” he murmured.  “Please say something.”

“W-what…”  I let out a bitter laugh.  “What are you saying, Minho?  Are you accusing my best friend of being a…a spy?!”

“I know it’s shocking,” he said, squeezing my hands tighter.  “But, you have to believe me, Seungmi.  I really think it’s her; I really think she’s dangerous.  I mean, I can explain.  You said yourself that the attacks started around the beginning of spring semester, back in January.  Well…when did you meet Yukari?”

“On the first day of spring semester,” I replied.

“Exactly.”  His big, brown eyes pleaded with mine.  “After that, everything started spiraling out of control.  She asserted herself into your life very quickly.  It seems like you and she became way too close, way too fast.”

“Is that a problem?” I snapped, leaning away from Minho.  “Excuse us for making friends, Minho.  Excuse me for wanting to have another exchange student friend, so I don’t feel so alone and out of place with all you high-brow Korean pop stars.  You would do the same thing if you were alone in America.”

“Except you aren’t an exchange student, missy.  I know the truth.” Minho tapped my forehead and I scowled.  “Don’t get all defensive, Mi.  Nobody is accusing you of anything.  I told you I’m happy that you made a friend.  I’m just trying to make you understand…you made the wrong friend.”

He scooted closer to me, but I continued to scoot away.

“Seungmi, all the signs point to her,” he added.  “After you and she became close, you let her into every aspect of your life and then you started facing all sorts of danger.  Exhibit A:  after you brought her over here to meet the guys, a couple of weeks later, you were attacked.  Directly.  Two poisonous vipers were dropped straight into Key’s bedroom.  That had to be work of someone who knew the exact layout of the penthouse, and they knew exactly where you slept at night.”  He tilted his head slightly.  “Am I making sense now?”

My jaw flexed angrily.  “You,” I growled.  “How dare you accuse my friend of trying to murder me!  She wouldn’t do that to me!”

“Exhibit B,” Minho said, and even his tone was becoming sour.  I was exasperating him.  “That girl in Vegas was Oriental.  Yukari is Oriental, too, in case you missed the memo.  Do I need to write it in the sky for you?  Put the puzzle together, Seungmi.”

His degrading tone really pushed my buttons.

My large, blue eyes furiously searched Minho’s face, yet his expression was just as stony.  He wasn’t kidding about this; he was for real.

I yanked myself out of his grip and leapt to my feet.  “I’m out of here,” I spat.  “I’m not going to sit around and let you make false accusations against my best friend.  You’re just crazy.”

“And, you’re just denying it,” Minho snapped as he rose to his feet, as well.  “That’s a characteristic I’ve noticed about you, Seungmi.  When something is true, you deny it.  When all of SHINee told you that Key was abusive and wrong for you…you denied it.  Now, you’re doing it again.”

My body froze in place and bristled.  The hair rose on the back of my neck.  The blood boiled within my veins.

I furiously spun around to face him.  “Don’t you dare bring Key into this!” I shouted, pointing my finger at him.  “I wasn’t wrong about him, Minho!  All he needed was time; time to figure out his emotions, and now he has figured them out.  He loves me!  Don’t you dare talk about him like you know him!”

As soon as my hysterical, angry outburst left my lips, I knew it was a mistake.  I knew I shouldn’t have said those things to Minho.  My fingers covered my mouth, as if I could somehow take back the explosion.

In front of me, Minho narrowed his pretty eyes.  “Why are you defending him, Seungmi?” Minho asked suspiciously, like he already knew the answer.  “Why are you taking Key’s side?  Your relationship with him –your time with him– is gone.  Don’t stand up for him, especially not in front of me.”

I took a deep breath and calmed down.  “It’s not important, anyway,” I murmured, turning halfway away from him again.  “We were talking about Yukari, not—”

“Do you love him, Seungmi?”

Minho’s sudden question struck me like a bolt of lightning.

I slowly turned my pale face towards him and I could see the emotion glistening in his eyes.

“Minho,” I said gently.  “I told you that’s not important right now.  We were discussing Yukari and how I might be in danger, and now all you want to talk about is Key.”

“Stop changing the subject,” Minho snapped through clenched teeth.  “Tell me the truth, Seungmi.  Do you love Kibum?  Is he the reason you seem so distracted lately?”

“I’m not distracted,” I whimpered.  “I just—”

“Then, what is it, Seungmi?” Minho demanded.  “What is it?”

I cringed as the tears rolled down my cheeks.  I couldn’t hurt Minho again; I just couldn’t.

“I love you, Minho,” I squeaked out.  “I really do.  But, Key is…still…”

Minho let out a furious gasp and glanced off to the left, trying to blink back his angry tears.  “He’s still what, Seungmi?” he cried.  “What is Key to you?”

Hysteria overwhelmed me and my fingers tore into my brown hair.  Why was this happening to me?  Just a minute ago, we’d been arguing about Yukari.  How had it morphed into a dispute about Key?!

And, why was Minho ganging up on me like this, throwing accusation after accusation?  Why was everyone ganging up on me now?!  Jonghyun and Onew had silently done it last night.

I wanted to scream and pull my hair out by the roots.

“Answer me, Seungmi,” Minho suddenly ordered, snapping my attention back to him.  “What is Key to you?”

But, I couldn’t answer him.  The emotion reflected in my expression was all the answer he needed.

Minho painfully squeezed his eyes shut, and then reopened them and stared up at the ceiling above, as if willing himself not to cry.  I could still see one tiny tear slide past his long, black eyelashes.

All of this I watched through my own soaking-wet eyes.  The saltwater streaked down my cheeks.

“I’m done,” Minho muttered after a moment.  “I’m done with your drama, Seungmi.  That’s all you’ve done since you came into our lives last August; just caused us drama.  I’ve had it.”

Each one of his words stabbed me like a knife in my gut.  I shook violently where I stood.  My legs might give out at any second.

Minho shoved past me towards his bedroom, and I flinched away from his body.  I could almost feel the ice in the air as he passed by.  I could almost feel the ice that would now encase his heart.

My own heart split into two pieces.

“Minho, please,” I whimpered, turning on my heel to face.  “Please, don’t go.”  The tears flowed harder as I watched him grab his car keys from his desk near the door.  “Please!”

“I’m done, Seungmi.”

That was all Minho said before yanking open his bedroom door and slamming it shut behind him.  I dropped to my knees on the floor and sobbed into my palms.

Out in the kitchen and the living room, I could hear Taemin and Onew calling out to Minho, asking him to slow down and tell them what was wrong.  But, Minho merely ignored them and stormed out of the penthouse.

I jolted as the front door slammed shut.  It seemed to echo into my bones; into my very soul.

Desperate, alone, and trembling, my hands reached for my cell phone in the pocket of my tight jeans.  Somehow, through my hysterical tears, I managed to dial Yukari’s number.  Even though we weren’t scheduled to meet for another hour, I couldn’t wait any longer.  She answered on the fourth ring.

“Yukari, I need to talk to you right now.”

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Oh, noez! D: Minho & Seungmi!  He can't do this to her...! :( Wahhh...lol

Sorry it's been a while.  I was very sick...with a horrible case of writer's block. hehe I've just barely recovered now; that's why this chapter might seem a bit lacking. >.>  Plus, I've been busy.  I visited my brother & I went to the zoo --where birds nearly yanked my conch piercing out of my ear. OW.

And, then today I almost set my house on fire. XD I popped a bag of popcorn & then started listening to 2PM & I forgot about my popcorn.  About 5 minutes later...the entire kitchen was filled with smoke. lol I'm a blonde... And tomorrow, I'm going horse riding for the first time since November! <333 Wish me luck!

Thank you guys & I LOVE LOVE LOVE you all! <3333 Since my horrible sickness is on its way out lol...I will most likely have another update soon! <333