+Nell+Slip Away+http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DfIGlH0cFTk&feature=relmfu

It was an ordinary gentle Sunday morning when I saw him again. It had been what, seven years since I last saw or heard anything from him. Our reunion wasn’t anything epic like in all those cliché movies. He simply walked into the café that I visited every Sunday morning. I was sitting by the front, gazing out the window when I saw a familiar face walk past and open the door. At first I thought my eyes were deceiving me. He walked right past me and up the counter to order. “I must be imagining things” I told myself. But then I heard his voice.

“One cappuccino please.”

It was distinctively the same. It was the same ardent yet reticent voice that I had missed hearing. I picked up my coffee cup and took it with me as I walked up to the counter and stood a few meters from the unknown yet familiar male. I turned to look at his face. He hadn’t noticed me yet. The moment I laid my eyes on him for a second time, I was sure. It was him. It was an image of the same defined jaw line, pointed nose and slightly parted lips that had been burnt into my memory. Even the two small faint moles under left eye were there. I had no doubt left. It was definitely Byunghun.

The realisation ignited a burning flame that I thought had long been put out. The warmth and electricity once again surged through my body. I didn’t want to feel this way again. I had convinced myself that I would never let it happen again. A longing feeling that could never be satisfied.

Suddenly he turned around to face my direction after he received his coffee. I gasped as he looked up, a spark of recognition in his eyes.

“Lee Chanhee? Is that you?”

If only you hadn’t seen me. If only I had run when I had the chance. If only I hadn’t let myself fall into your trap again.

+++++++++

We spent the rest of the morning and afternoon catching up on what we had missed in the past seven years. It was the first time I had realised how much time had really passed. For starters, I had already achieved my childhood dream of becoming a singer. My debut album was set to come out next month. On the other hand, Byunghun had also found his dream. Back in high school we had vowed to pursue music together, but at the beginning of our final year at high school Byunghun confessed that he would rather have a quiet peaceful job. He didn’t want to deal with the restrictions that would be placed upon him if he became a public icon. Instead he decided to pursue an ordinary job. He’s now the marketing director for a large electronics company in America.

His dream wasn’t the only thing that changed at the time. As much as he denied it, I sensed that he also had a change of heart in regards to our relationship. We grew further and further apart as our last year of high school went on. There were many endless nights of tears, arguments and lost sleep. Before I knew it, the emotional distance between us was just too much. Graduation was the final straw. With Byunghun striving for his dream at an American university, I was grounded in Korea to pursue my music. The physical distance was just too much for our already strained relationship.  

Even though we were only 25, Byunghun was already engaged. He had come back to Korea to break the news to his parents. He was only going to be here for three days and it was already the second day of his short trip. He admitted that he had dated many girls in America after ending our relationship. I didn’t blame him because he wasn’t the only one, though my flings never lasted more than a day.

“It’s nice speaking Korean again. I miss it.” He sighed. “America is so big that it’s easy to lose yourself in it.”

I nodded in agreement, but I didn’t really understand. Not really. Even loneliness comes in different colours. Though he looked like the same Byunghun from five years ago, I sensed that he had changed. I wasn’t sure if it was a good thing or not, but regardless I felt that nagging feeling building up where all I wanted to do was unload all of my loneliness onto him and hope that he would comfort me like he used to.

+++++++++

“What happened to us Chanhee?” He whispered apathetically as he took another sip of alcohol from his glass.

“I don’t know. Maybe we were just never meant to be.” I joined him and downed another shot.

“I didn’t mean our relationship. I meant our lives... Why does it always feel… so cold? Seven years is nothing Chanhee. It’s absolutely nothing… if you haven’t done anything.” He slurred, clearly affected by the toxins that we were consuming at a rapid rate.

“What do you mean you haven’t done anything? You’re the flipping marketing director in a large famous company. What have I been doing with myself? Seven years. It took me seven years to finally get out an album. You’d think I would’ve given up by now.” Calling for another glass from the bartender, I dismissed his ridiculous claim. “I agree though. Why is the world always so cold? So colourless.”

Byunghun chuckled. “I haven’t told you have I? The only reason I’m the marketing director is because my fiancée is the daughter of the CEO. I didn’t earn any of it.”

“At least you’ll be rich though. I’m still as poor as ever. I don't even know if my album will sell and part time jobs can only get you so far.”

“I would rather be poor than live in such a monochromatic world of money.”

“Don’t say things you don’t mean Byunghun.”

“I do mean it. Just look at us. We never dreamed of being like this back in high school. We never wanted to be sitting in some dirty bar, sulking about how we hate our lives.”

“Even if nothing has happened, we sure have changed haven’t we?” I smirked before finishing my current glass of flavoured poison. The liquid slowly eroded away my sense of logic.

“My point exactly. What happened to us Chanhee? Why are we like this? What exactly happened when we parted ways? I don’t even remember what warmth feels like anymore.” He leaned his heavy against my shoulder as he closed his eyes. “Do you know?”

“I’m sorry.”

+++++++++

We stumbled into my small apartment and crashed onto my bed, only stopping quickly to take off our shoes. Jumping on top of me, he crashed his hot lips against mine as he explored my mouth with his tongue. Our intoxicated minds pushed out any common sense that either of us had left. The tingling of when his fingers brushed against my skin burnt right through.

“I’m cold Byungie~” I whispered into his ear in between our fevered kisses.

“Don’t worry. We’ll both remember soon. I’ll make us remember what warmth is.”

My delirious mind let me trust him. I trusted his every word. I let him take us back to the world of seven years ago. A world full of warmth, colour and love. A world that we could neither remember nor understand.

“I love you Chanhee. I always loved you.”

“I love you too Byunghun. Chanhee will love Byunghun for eternity.”

Our soft whispers were lost amongst the rushed breaths and pained moans.

The heat was tremendous, addictive and driven by pure desperation and desire. Clouded over in bliss mixed with a tinge of confusion, I let myself sink deeper and deeper into this forgotten world.

On this gentle Sunday evening, we loved each other again.

+++++++++

I hated Monday mornings. I always did and always will. I groaned as I forced myself out of bed. I rubbed my temples hoping to relieve the burning pain. Blinking a few times to let my eyes become accustomed to the light shining in from my window, I slowly regained my cognitive abilities.

“How much did I drink last night?” I asked myself.

Too much.

I groaned again as I placed my hand by my side on the empty bed. A faint memory flickered in my mind as I remembered something important.

Byunghun.

I frantically glanced around my apartment. My clothes from yesterday were strewn all over the floor next to my bed. The stacks of paper on the tables were untouched and the house was dead silent. There were no signs of another person’s presence.

“So the bastard left without saying anything.” I muttered as I laughed. “That’s so Byunghun.”

I shifted my aching body to get out of bed when I spotted a slip of paper neatly folded on my bedside table. I picked it up and held it up to the light.

“If this was a movie I wouldn’t have noticed this and would have probably spent the rest of my life sulking over the fact he disappeared without an explanation.” I paused as I examined the writing. Even without unfolding the paper, I could recognise the scribbles by the indents on the paper from the pressure of the pen that he used. “In the case where the main character would find the message, they would read it and cry over their lost love right?” I contemplated my next move carefully. “Well I don’t live in a movie.” I stepped out of bed and walked over to the door, scrunched up the paper and threw it into the bin. “So even though I found it, I’m not going to read it.”

I quickly threw on some clothes, grabbed a piece of raisin toast from the kitchen along with my bag and rushed out of my apartment without a second thought.

I never knew what Byunghun had left for me on that piece of paper and I didn’t care. Maybe we would never see each other again. Maybe I would never feel the same warmth that I felt last night again. Maybe we would meet again in another seven years and fall desperately in love once more. Everything was still uncertain.

As far as I was concerned, Byunghun and I didn’t live in a cliché movie. We lived in the real world. Reality. Reality is cold and harsh. I’m sure Byunghun felt the same, but we wouldn’t have it any other way. Unlike movies, reality comes with chance. It comes with fleeting happiness and unexpected sorrow. In reality, there is no end. It will continue on forever, taunting you and testing you. Love is just the same.

Just because we loved each other, it didn’t mean we had to be together. Sometimes the feeling of being truly in love and knowing someone sincerely loved you is enough to last a lifetime.

The ending is a little ambiguous and I do have some problems with it... meh. The last two sentences you could say were my inspiration/prompt that this whole thing was based on. I don't remember when I had thought of it but I tend to collect random things I think of on my iPod and then weave them into fics. :) 

Anyways, hope you enjoyed it. Comment if you did! Tell me your favourite sentence/phrase/paragraph! :D