Story Title: Love Behind the Scene
Author: Junhwa
Date of Reviw Completion: Sunday, May 12 2012
 

Title [3/5]

The title itself is pretty nice and sweet. A little over-used, but these over-used titles tend to be the type that appeal to most Asian Fanfic readers here so it's good. I only took one mark off for unoriginallity. However, why did I take two? The title itself is not correctly written.

Love behind the scene
Love Behind the Scene

Titles must have capital letters. Other than that - it's pretty decent.
 

Description/Foreword [6/10]

The description was short and straight to the point, well written.

The foreword was appealing, however, some mistakes.

I've been working at SM Entertainment right after my graduation from high school for about a year now.
I've been working at SM Entertainment since my graduation from high school for about a year now.

consulted with a the HR*
consulted with the HR*
or
consulted with a HR*

(depends what you mean)

Now, a week have passed and so far, nothing's really click in yet.
Now, a week has passed and so far, nothing's really clicked in yet.

Poster and Background [10/10]

You requested for me not to review the poster or background but honestly, they are pretty good. I mean, so good that I'm giving them full marks and it'll bring up your percentage in the end. So far, I shall give you a grading score here since it's perfect.

Story Plot [17/30]

Of course it's yet too really to make any large assumptions when it's only been 4/5 chapters into the story. I like the plot, basic and simple. A maid coming into the EXO's house, becomes close to them without intentially doing so - it's a very common and basic plot.

I like how already only in the beginning we can see some tension rising, and a solid plot forming. I have to say, Chapter 5's scene. Wow. Nice detail.

What I like about the plot is it's solidity and firmness. I don't like the simplicity. Try twisting something around in the plot to add to your own originality.

Originality [6/15]

Like I mentioned in the plot, it was rather odd. It wasn't exactly predictable, which in a way was good. But when there were moments in the story that were supposed to be "breath-taking" - they seemed rather bland. I liked the last chapter (5) where they ended up in the closet. That was creative. In general, I have come across the plot, however, readers seem to enjoy this stuff on Asian Fanfics.

Grammar and Spelling [10/20]

At first, I was going to spell-check every single chapter. However, I found that in the first chapter you mentioned you didn't revise the chapter so I skipped it. Afterwards I noticed you mentioned in chapter two as well. However, I could not prolong it any further and began doing grammar and spelling corrections from chapter three onwards.

Chapter 3

That boy have bad intentions towards my man and I ain't backing down!
That boy has bad intentions towards my man and I ain't backing down!

began a nasty rage of anger venting on nthe poor pillows.
began a nasty rage of anger venting on the poor pillows.

Sehun comes back with full anticipation of Luhan lashing out at him over that small plant incident.
Sehun came back with full anticipation of Luhan lashing out at him over that small plant incident.

Chapter 5

though he had vented out a little as he punches Sehun's pillows a few times and shoves his dirty laundry into the washer like choking down something.
though he had vented out a little as he punched Sehun's pillows a few times and shoved his dirty laundry into the washer like choking down on something. 

which was a hella mess despite the fact that Jae Min had cleaned it like three days ago
which was a hell of a mess despite the fact that Jae Min had cleaned it like three days ago

Jae Min felt guilty as he flashes back to that gorgeous smile Luhan had put on when Jae Min told him that he'd get the plant for him.
Jae Min felt guilty as he flashed back to that gorgeous smile Luhan had put on when Jae Min told him that he'd get the plant for him.

He still hasn't told Luhan about the whole deal yet and don't plan to either.
He still hadn't told Luhan about the whole deal yet and don't plan to either.

Jae Min's eyes widen in horror.
Jae Min's eyes widened in horror.

Vocabulary [4/5]

You have very good vocabulary. You used good words like refuting and affiliation. I liked those. However, I do have a small issue. Sometimes, you tend to repeat a word too often in one sentence. For example, instead of saying then and then twice in one sentence, you could sub-in by saying "leading up to", "afterwards" or "followed by". If you wish to use more technical vocabulary, you could try using "anon" or "forthwith".

Entertainment [5/5]

It was entertaining and gripping, made me want to read on all the way. There was plenty of drama and cliffhangers to make you want to finish the story.

Characters [8/15]

Most of the EXO characters were well presented and portrayed. Jae Min, the main character, unfortunately, was not. Jae Min is nice, caring yet weak as a character. He seems too bland, typical and orthodox. He didn't have any flaws about him (other than the fact that he manages to get himself in awkward situations) and he seemed like any old soppy-joe character. Jae Min, in my (unprofessional) opinion, needs to have one strong feature in his character and one flaw. In fact, the strong feature could be his flaw. Something like from Macbeth where his ambition is the strongest feature yet also the one which brings to his downfall.

Writing Style and Flow [6/10]

Writing style was not the typical one, and it was one that was rather appealing. I'm not sure how to judge this, but it's written in a mixture of a script and as a book. On a professional (lol) level, no marks. But because I personally enjoyed it, six. It also had a nice flow. Easy going and smooth.

Total [75/125]

60% - C²

Note: Keep up the good work! I was harsh and strict, yet you got yourself a decent mark! Remember to follow the rules please.