“Your time limit has been cut. You now only have six months.”

What…

Did…

She…

Just…

Say…?

“Pardon me, Madame?” I say.

“I said,” she tells me sweetly. “Your limit has been cut. You only have six months. By the new year, I expect my son to be a well-mannered, kind-hearted, sweetheart. If he isn‘t, you‘re fired.”

“W-wha…?” I spurt stupidly.

“Actually,” Madame Taemin says. “You know what? I’ll give you six months to make my son fall in love with you.”

WHAT THE HELL? IS THIS CHICK ING CRAZY?

“W-what…?”

“Make him fall in love with you. What I’ve learned is love makes better on whole. He’ll become more considerate and less…less like how his father use to be. ” She has a weird smile on her face. “Yes. Go make him fall in love with you. That is the only way he’ll change for the better.”

OH MY GOD.

OHHHH SHIIIT.

YOU CAN’T RAISE CHILREN, LADY. YOU ARE CRAZY. POOR TAE!

“Also,” she says, “you’re a decent girl, and you are quite intelligent. Learn how to cook and I may allow you to marry my little boy! Ahaha!”

THIS IS PROSITITUION, OR SOMETHING.

OH MY GOD.

I’m sooooooooooooo screwed.

my ing life.

-0-

…

…

…

…

“Okay, so we have six months to turn him,” I point at Tae, “into someone like us. But not as crazy.”

Everyone nods.

“And so, before we do anything serious, we need to all act as a family because really, who other than family would willingly help someone without asking for money?”

“No one!” Young cries.

I nod. “Right. Therefore we should all get to know each other in some TV-like manner that will end up helping Tae.”

“This calls for an epic vacation,” Young cries, and begins calling up various friends who own loads of cottages and .

I take this moment to grab Minho and drag him out of the room.

“What?” He says.

“It’s Madame Taemin,” I hiss in a really low voice. “She wants me to…she wants me…to make her son ing fall in love with me!”

“SHE WHAT!?” Minho spewed.

Major deja-vu.

“I know,” I mumble. “She’s deluded herself into thinking love with change her son for the better.”

“YOU CAN’T TAKE MY NEW HUBBY AWAY FROM ME!” He cries. “I JUST TAUGHT HIM HOW TO WATER PLANTS PROPERLY!”

“This isn’t the time joking, Minho, I’m being serious!” I shout. “I’m so screwed it’s not even funny anymore.”

“Just fake it,” he suggests. “Really, it isn’t that hard. A little acting lessons and bam! You get your job back and he gets his money back. We’re all happy.”

I consider this. “Okay. Let’s go get Tae—who the hell is that?” I point at the chick chatting it up with our resident . That kind of rhymed. Maybe. Not too sure, actually.

“Oh, I think that’s Yoora, a left-winger. She’s Madame Taemin’s new stylist I think.” Minho explains.

I stare at her. Yoora was exceptionally good-looking, with wavy chestnut hair that glistened as if it were somehow graphically made to do that, and she had extremely pale skin, almost fragile. Not only that, she also looked (disappointingly) nice. Then she smiled at Tae and I swear it was almost angelic.

She was one of the girls that any man would have an eyebrow-raise for. UGH.

“I thought Key was Madame’s stylist,” I say.

“He is. But she got another one.” Minho says. “You know she has more than one, right? Key is just, like, the head or something.”

“I see.”

“Stupid ,” we jump at the third voice. We nearly scream when we see who it is. It was Key. As in, the guy who threatened to break out little buttocks before.

Minho’s eyes grew larger, if it was possible. They dude did have humongous eyes, after all. “OH MY—mrghf!”

Key clamed a hand over Minho’s mouth and pointed in the direction of where Yoora was. I think he was telling us to watch.

“Oh, Taemin! Wait a sec—" Yoora says.

Then it happened.

Yoora started playing with Taemin's hair.

I open my mouth to start screaming lamentations to the heavens—when I realize that Yoora was still alive. And intact. And humming—Super Junior‘s No Other, to be exact.

This was very difficult for us to comprehend. Minho, who was released from Key’s grip, bangs his head against the wall a few times—I don’t think Madame would notice a few dents in the wall.

Sadly, his attempts failed to return the scene before him to any state of normalcy.

When Yoora had finished smoothing out Taemin's hair, she gave him a shy smile and—and—

GOOD LORD, WAS TAEMIN SMILING?

I kind of want to cry. Competition was not even the right word for me and this…girl…angel…thing…it was more like…Yoora was the determined winner from the start.

If Madame Taemin wanted her son to fall in love, why didn't he just ask this girl?

“She looks like an angel, right?” Key says as I snap back into reality.

“Uh, yeah—OW!” I cry out as he slapped me really hard in the face. “The hell is your problem!”

“I thought all you right-wingers had fake-detectors implanted in your butts, or something!” Key cried. “Look at her. REALLY look at her and tell me she’s an angel.”

She giggles at something Taemin says. I stare into her eyes, half expecting to see unicorns and rainbows, but all I see is….nothing. Just darkness.

The girl literally had a blank stare—wait, no. I see something. She looks like she was…calculating? The hell?

“Well?” Key says seriously. “Is she an angel?”

“Er, a robotic one…?” I try.

“IDIOT!” He cries, slapping again. WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS MAN? WHY DOES HE KEEP SLAPPING ME!

“Look,” he growls. “This girl isn’t like the rest us, alright? We may be stuck up and everything, but she this is the worst. We actually respect the Taemin family, alright? We actually give a crap about them and if you allow that goddamn PINK FAIRY to fall in love with Taemin, I WILL EAT YOU FOR LUNCH, UNDERSTAND?”

“But, why me?” I cry.

“Because I hate those types of fake-innocent freaking girls that glue onto our Taemin and will probably bankrupt this family, so you better get him to not fall for her NOW! I'd rather a plain idiot like you be with him that that con-artist!"

“But how do you know she’s a con-artist!?” I ask.

“She dated a friend of mine before, it ended with him only caring for her every little whim until he no longer had enough money to even support himself.” He muttered. “Now, he’s living on the streets, and….I will not allow her to ruin another person’s life, understand? NOW GO GET HIM AWAY FROM THAT THING!”

“OW!” I cry, hitting the ground. I was a few centimetres away from the happy couple.

“E-eto, are you alright?” Yoora gasped.

ETO? Are you kidding me? Mixing Korean with JAPANESE?

GAG. GAG. GAG. GAG.

“I’m peachy.” I mumble. “Oi, Tae, let’s go. I’m teaching you how to properly clean a bathtub just by using TANG!”

“Hell no—”

“You’ll do it? GREEEAT. Let’s go!” I cry, dragging him away from the pink fairy. She looked as though she half-expected him to protest or something. When he didn’t, she then glared at me.

It was kind of funny, actually. I noted the smile of approval from Key and the thumbs up from Minho.

“Just because you helped me once doesn’t mean I’ll do everything you’ll say, Litch,” he mutters, punching me lightly.

“Litch? Really?” I laugh. “Nothing’s going to top Tae. I’m sorry, but that’s a fact.”

He sticks his tongue at me.

So, I have six months to get this fool to fall in love with me. I also have two very scary people out to get me if I don’t.

Sigh.

This’ll take some work, seeing as I don‘t know squat about love.

CHICK FLICKS AND ADVICE COLUMNS, WAIT FOR ME!!

-0-

Meanwhile, Yoora stood silently where she was once talking with Taemin, a smile on her face. A sweet, innocent…diabolical smile.

She was not happy, not happy at all. Taemin would belong to her, and that was a fact. Sure, girls could envy her, she knew she was hot and that she could pluck any boy from a crowd if she liked, but Taemin's presence had made her feel even more special, plus he was a rich and hot.

Boys were like toys, and this was one toy she was not going to give up.

Blue-haired girl, whoever the hell you are, this means was war.

—end of DAY V—

A/N:

SHIIIIIIIIT. THIS MEANS WAR, LIN! X)

This chapter was really fun to write. Expect loads of laughs and drama your way, guys! Thanks to all those who commented and subscribed, I hope you enjoyed this chapter too! :D  

Also, does anyone want to make a poster for this fic? I have the skills of a toddler when it comes to those kind of things! XD LET ME KNOW, I WILL FOREVER LOVE YOU LIKE THE STALKER I AM! LOL! X)