Hello here the first chapter

sorry if there a mistake in my writing.

enjoyy the reading

March 2021

Joohyun thought her day would end as uneventful as yesterday, but a single glance changed her day drastically.

That one look, which lasted for more than five seconds, has completely destroyed not only her day but also her mood.

Joohyun averts her eyes.

Heart hammering against her ribcages and the loud sound blaring in this penthouse start to fade.

All she can hear is her own anxious heart beating and her mind desperately wanting to leave the place.

But fate is not on her side tonight.

‘Irene!’

She's ignoring the desperate call from someone and taking a long stride towards the entrance of the penthouse.

Fingers wrap around her wrist and turn her around.

It is her cousin, Kim Taeyeon.

‘Irene, where are you going?’

For a second, she thought it was her. She is so scare to glance at the area where her eyes met hers.

her panic state, sending her mind into a state of chaos to the extent that she doesn’t recognise her cousin's voice.

‘Hey are you okay?’ Taeyeon stepped forward to take a closer look at her cousin's face.

Gulping down the lump, she said,'I'm okay’ and she let out a shaky breath while trying to mask her uneasiness with a thin smile. ‘Why – why are you calling me?’

‘oh! I want to introduce you to someone.’

Joohyun unwilling let her cousin drag her back into the centre of the penthouse, where it is crowded.

Tonight, all she needs to do is make it until the birthday cake ceremony, then she can excuse herself.

Joohyun froze on the spot when standing in front of them is the person who made her want to run away from this party.

Their eyes met again for more than ten seconds this time.

Joohyun sees all of their past fragments behind that dark brown eye.

Her long nails dug into her own flesh as she clenched her fists at her sides. She squeezed it so tightly that she could not feel the pain, even though it might soon sever her flesh.

How could she feel pain when the old wound is causing her heart to bleed again?

Why does that pair of eyes still have the power to hurt her? She resents those monolid eyes with every breath.

Joohyun day usually starts at 5 in the morning. She has her own routine and always strictly follows it. Her parents's stern parenting is the reason behind it.

Today though she needs to skip a few parts of her daily routine.

Skipping a routine put her in a very distraught mood, and she already has someone to blame for this.

It is her cousin Kim Taeyeon who forces Joohyun to attend her birthday party.

Joohyun thought it was a normal gathering among their family, but when she received an invitation card that looked so lavish.

Joohyun knows she made a mistake by agreeing to attend the party. She is anti-social, well nowadays she is.

In the past, she was the bubbly neighbourhood girl.

That girl is long dead.

Thus, even before she attends, this party will drain her energies.

It is a masquerade-themed birthday party, meaning that Bae Joohyun cannot wear her comfortable clothes like usual.

Still, this is her loving cousin's birthday. up her anti-social life and put on the white, off shoulder satin dress.

The dress complements her pale skin colour and body shape; it brings out her confident image.

The dress is made in a satin flowy fabric with a little taste of elegance and iness, with front draping and a side slit that teases her gorgeous leg.

The party full of high-profile people from the entertainment industry since her cousin is a famous idol and singer.

This party is too much for someone who hates the crowd.

Suddenly, she feels so grateful for the masquerade theme that she gets to hide behind this while wearing a gold embroidery mask with flower lace on the left side.

She doesn’t feel exposed with this mask.

But now, Joohyun feels . The colombina masquerade mask didn’t do justice to her at all.

‘Remember the artist I want to introduce you to?’

She is all calm. Joohyun notices that the person standing in front of her is nothing like her, who scrambled to run away the second their eyes met a moment ago.

So this doesn’t affect her at all? Is it me alone all over again??

That question rings in her head. Joohyun wonders: Does the mask she is wearing right now make her unrecognisable?

But she recognises the person with a single glance.

‘well’ Taeyeon clapped her hand once. ‘This is her, Kang Seulgi’

There is no need for that introduction, actually; Joohyun used to know this person inside out.

Keyword, used to.

Now standing in front of her is someone completely new; this is not the same Kang Seulgi she used to know.

Kang Seulgi used to hate parties, hate crowded places, and hate dressing up.

Kang Seulgi she used to know always fidget when meeting a new person.

However, now she is wearing a black long dress with a black tuxedo jacket, it hugged her body well. It seems like she goes with a gothic look for the party.

Maybe Joohyun still knows a tiny part of this Seulgi; she is still into black.

Her mask is also black, but with a bronze colour in it. the mask covering her entire face except that pair of eyes.

And yet, Joohyun still recognises Seulgi.

One word echoes in Joohyun's head.

Pity.

‘Kang Seulgi’

Seulgi offers a handshake, but Joohyun's mind is having an internal battle with herself right now.

Hearing her voice after years have passed pulls Joohyun back into that time.

A time where she remained committed long after Seulgi was gone. A time where Seulgi put her in the lowest place and Joohyun still wanted Seulgi in her life.

She begs the gods to bring Seulgi back each and every night. However, God refused to grant her wish. Maybe everyone is right, maybe the holy book is right... Their love is a sin.

Maybe that's why God didn’t grant her wish of wanting to be with Seulgi.

She did something that her beliefs strongly opposed, but she nonetheless kneeled, closed her eyes, and prayed to God, pleading with him to allow her to keep plunging deeper and deeper into that sea of immorality.

That was her, eight years ago….

That is how pathetic Bae Joohyun was a few years ago.

She is still pathetic.

Seeing how poised Seulgi is right now, even offering a handshake.

It makes Joohyun feel so small standing here in front of a person that destroys her heart and her soul.

Yet deep down, Joohyun knows her heart is still longing for her.

Joohyun hates herself for that; it makes her feel vulnerable when she cannot control her own heart.

A nudge on her arm by her cousin signalled with her eyes that Seulgi's hand was still in the mid air.

Taeyeon probably wonders why her cousin, who is always calm and collected, is looking so distraught right now.

The answer is right in front of her. Kang Seulgi is Bae Joohyun's ex-lover, and not a single soul knows that.

They kept it a secret. That was the case then, as it continues to be; Joohyun cannot claim that Seulgi, a woman, is her former lover.

Despite the passage of time, society still detests that kind of love.

‘Irene’ her voice barely makes it out there.

Joohyun accepted the handshake out of politeness.

Joohyun felt her muscles stiffen and her stomach turn as their hands touched. Joohyun is aware that Seulgi can tell she is anxious based on the coldness of her hand at the moment.

That is, if she even remembers how Joohyun is.

‘Bae Irene’ she said her name once again with much confidence, with her family name this time.

The handshake happens for a brief moment, and Joohyun pulls her hand away. Their eyes are still one another.

Joohyun can see the darkness still there, and Joohyun loves to drown herself in that darkness back in the past.

She didn’t realise back then that she was a willing hostage to Kang Seulgi's constant emotional abuse.

Her heart was severely scarred, and sh