"What do you want Motoya? I'm at practice," Sakusa grumbled while pressing the door to the locker room open with his shoulder since his hands were occupied with his bag and phone, as well as a water bottle he intended to drink from when his cousin called.
Apparently early in the morning when both of them had their respective occupations was the best time for a little chat.

"No, you're on your way to practice. Subtle but important difference." Komori corrected.

"Not really, I'm already here and late. Miya won't let me live this down the whole day."

A small chuckle echoed from the other end of the line.
"I know but you still gotta change so just put me on speaker. I have to talk to you."

Sakusa rolled his eyes but obliged. His cousin for sure could be annoying but if he said there was something to talk about he trusted him that it wouldn't be something trivial.
"You're lucky that you caught me the one day I'm late. If the others were here I wouldn't—"

"If by day you mean week then sure. You're not as unpredictable as you think, Kiyo. Whenever you're stressed you over-organize stuff until you're so far in the future that you forget the present. Happens every year when family events roll around."

Sakusa scowled at his phone as he pulled his shirt over his head.

"Which by the way is exactly what I wanted to talk about." Komori continued.

"There is nothing to talk about. I'm not going." Sakusa insisted.

"You will."

"Why? So that my parents can pretend they have forgotten my coming out yet again and play matchmaker, setting me up with one of the daughters from Mom's friends. Again."

"I'm not saying you're not justified in not going, I'm just saying that you won't. Despite everything I ever tell you, you can't seem to cut ties with them." The libero let out a sigh.

"If you haven't noticed they hold my inheritance and any financial support over my head like a guillotine, ready to be cut off any time. If volleyball doesn't—"

"But it will. Honestly Kiyo, you're doing so well for yourself."

Silence followed his statement as Sakusa wasn't sure what to say to that. He went to the sink to refill his water bottle just to have an excuse to finish the conversation before attending the very job he was putting in jeopardy over this.

"Doesn't matter." Komori continued. "We won't get anywhere like this. I just wanted to say that maybe I have a solution for the matchmaking. I know you hate it."

He did. He really did but any attempt to stop it was a fight against the tide. The flood would come regardless.

He lied about having a boyfriend, it continued. He lied about having a girlfriend, they wanted proof.
He had an actual boyfriend, who broke up with him because he couldn't endure his parent's antics anymore. They tried setting him up on dates in front of him.

To say he was tempted by Motoya's suggestion was an understatement.

"I'll take your silence for curiosity. So why don't you get yourself a date?" he suggested.

And here he had gotten his hopes up.
"You know how that went the last time."

The pain was far from fresh anymore but he was still upset. It wasn't like he had been the love of his life but he was nice and certainly didn't deserve to be treated like garbage and worst of all Sakusa already had a really hard time finding someone he considered genuinely romantically attractive from which point on most were scared off by his odd nature and germophobia and now the rest was chased away by his family... great, he thought sarcastically.

"No, that's not what I meant. Nothing serious just a fling or it could even be fake. Get someone who can put up with these idiots and warn them." Komori elaborated.
"If you want your peace of mind ask a woman, if you want to piss off your parents find a good partner in crime. Personally, that's my favourite option."

"You're clearly overestimating my social skills. How many friends do you think I have who I could ask something like that?"

"Okay, so the fling isn't an option?"

"I won't toy with anyone's emotions like that."

"It's not 'toying with someone's emotions' if the intentions are clear from the get-go and both agree." his cousin protested.

Sakusa knew that. After all, he had several flings throughout his high school years, and shortly after, some just to spite his parents. It was a lame excuse and childish because quite frankly after a few rebounds — just casual stuff nothing serious — following his previous relationship his parents had ruined, he felt no desire to get involved with anyone for a while.

Not really to his surprise, casual wasn't really for him and he indulged in it less and less over the years. It helped that he got more independent and mentally stable as soon as he was away from home.

"As to who, what about 'Miya'?" Sakusa almost choked on air.
"If he manages to tick you off so efficiently, your parents should be a piece of cake." He could practically hear the grin in Komori's voice.

"We are not friends." he close to growled, trying to convey the disdain toward Motoya's idea.

The liberi pretend not to hear it.
"I'll admit the amount of between the two of you is a bit uncommon for platonic relationships but I won't judge and hey, I think you're on a pretty good way," he said encouragingly.

Sakusa's jaw clenched and he felt the distinct desire to reach through the phone and throw something at his cousin.
"I have to go to practice now."

"Think about it! You could—"
He hung up. The ace placed his phone in his bag, took his water bottle, and quickly hurried out to the others, bowing to his coach in apology as he passed him before joining the others.

Meian acknowledged his lateness with a slight bit of earning protest from Atsumu that he would always get scolded when he was too late, which admittedly didn't happen as often as Sakusa expected — he truly seemed to love his job — bit still on average no one could compare to Sakusa in being on time.

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To make up for being late Sakusa ran a couple of extra laps around the gym after training, unprompted but earning a nod of approval from coach Forster. As such he was last when entering the locker rooms again, catching a few snippets of a very interesting conversation.

"I'm telling you, Bo, there is something between Omi-san and Tsumu. I'd bet on it." Hinata whispered, which meant the whole team could hear.

"No way, Tsum-Tsum for sure would have told us if that was the case!" Bokuto added. He was certainly the only one who was even worse than Hinata at controlling the volume of his voice.

"Don't you see how they look at each other sometimes?!" the smaller insisted.

At each other? He didn't think he glanced at the blonde any longer than necessary on and off the court.

"I'm kinda with Bokuto in this one," Thomas chimed in. "Atsumu is such a show-off. He wouldn't have shut up about it if—"

"If what?" The person in question joined the conversation. "You know it's not nice to talk about propel behind their back."
Apparently, he had just left the showers while the others were already changing into normal clothes again.

"Is there something between you and our favourite germaphobe?" Inunaki asked him directly.

"Who? Omi? Nah, but I'm sure he likes me." he said in his typical confident tone and Sakusa rolled his eyes, though he was sure Atsumu didn't mean it in a romantic way.

"As friends or—?" Hinata questioned.

"Of course, as friends. I'm not even sure he likes men."

"Dude, you're blind." Thomas laughed and Sakusa heard a rustling as he shouldered his back.

"Yeah, though I think you'd be too annoying for him. Even as friends. Sorry, Tsumu." Inunaki added nonchalantly.

"Huh?! Who are you calling annoying!? I bet he likes me!"

"Sure, let's say ten bucks?" the white-haired suggested.

"You're on!"

From the corner, Sakusa heard the not-so-quiet mumbling of Bokuto and Hinata making their own bets about whether they'd end up together.

Sakusa leaned against the wall of lockers separating them exasperated and contemplating his options. Maybe, just maybe, Motoya wasn't so wrong. And now he had something he could offer Atsumu in return, his pride. He was fairly certain Miya would do a fair deal for that.

He walked in, knowing that waiting any longer would come off as weird — if it wasn't already — and went straight to the showers. He knew he would have the chance to catch Atsumu afterwards before he left. He was always the last to leave while Sakusa was usually the first. The only reason he noticed were days like these when he was late in the morning.

True to his expectations once he returned Atsumu was still there slowly dressing himself.

"I heard about the bet." he started after the last of the others had left.

He said it as nonchalantly as possible while putting the towel aside and putting on his neatly folded clothes. Atsumu flinched and made an unintelligent noise of being caught.

"I'm sorry Omi, it was just a silly little... If you prefer I'll cancel it. Not that there is much use to it now anyway."

Sakusa watched him struggle and waited until his blabbering subsided before he continued.
"Not necessary."

The blonde looked up surprised.

"I actually wanted to suggest a deal that might be beneficial for the both of us."

Atsumu's eyes narrowed in suspicion and Sakusa had the slight hunch that he didn't want to know what was going on in his head at that very moment. So he quickly resumed talking.
"My parents plan a family get-together for this weekend. They are quite conservative, not to say outright homophobic, and always try to match me with some random girl so Motoya suggested I bring a date to stop them.
"And preferably annoy them a bit. Since I know no one more annoying than you..." he explained.

Atsumu raised his brows before his typical smug smirk spread on his face that made him look somewhere between punch and kissable.
"So ya want me to be yet date Omi-Omi?"

"Fake-date" he was quick to clarify.

"Sure, right. Because you don't actually like men."

"I like men, just not idiots like you."

Atsumu's eyes grew round in surprise. He was shocked, so much so that he almost forgot to be offended by the last part. He pouted.
"And what do I get from that? I don't particularly fancy ya taking jabs at me for the whole weekend. I don't really have a thing for humiliation." he grinned as Sakusa almost choked and struggled to keep his composure, while his cheeks burnt red and he glared at the setter.

Deep breaths. This was exactly why he was perfect for this.

"This. You can be your full-on obnoxious self the whole weekend, flirt with me as aggressively as you like with no holding back and piss off some conservative s in the process. I know that that is one of your favourite hobbies."

Atsumu grinned wildly, almost feral and Sakusa just knew he'd be in for a wild ride if the blonde agreed. Letting him run free was a dangerous calculation for Kiyoomi's dignity and just hoped he would get to enjoy his parent's sour expression without getting too flustered and before he died of embarrassment.

"And you win the bet," he added finally.

The clear, joyous laugh of the setter echoed through the room and from the walls as he held his sides, as though Sakusa had just told him the funniest joke he had ever heard, irritating the spiker further.

"You got a deal, Darling." the blonde grinned.

"Save the pet names for the weekend, Miya."
He quickly rushed to get out before Atsumu could see the blush blossoming on his cheeks, rapidly rising in intensity. Pray to the gods that he'd survive this one.

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Author's Note:

Thank you for reading! I hope you liked it!

Podfic/Audiobook version - Chapter 01