How it has begun and then ended
If regret could kill... [OneShot]
Eunhyuk POV:
I still remember the first time I saw you. We were only 10 years old but you had been through so much already, a cute boy with such a dark life. Everyone at school stopped talking with you just because your father murdered your mother and got arrested, you were only a victim in that mess but still no one understood you.
I felt pity for you at the beginning but then we started to get along, you opened to me, went to your old self, outgoing and always smiling. With time we became best friends, I would go to your orphanage frequently.
Years passed and our friendship got even stronger. At age of 14, when I got hit by a car and had to stay at the hospital for 2 months you never wanted to leave my side, sometimes you even ditched some classes to make me company. You were my source of energy, like a real brother, without you I was nothing.
Every year you would throw a birthday party for me with my parents and all our friends, half of them were from your orphanage but I didn’t mind, we were like a big family. We lived like that until our eighteens, sometimes you slept at my house… I can’t really call it sleepovers because we never slept those times. We would speak all night about our dreams for the future, giving advices about girls and stuff although I never had a girlfriend for more than one month at that time, all because of you!
They complained that we spent too much time together, they were always put apart by me but I never cared. I always preferred your friendship although you never had one girlfriend, every time I asked you said you already had someone who you loved but didn’t have the courage to tell that person. I gave you so much support though I didn’t who that person was at those times.
I loved you like a brother until that fatal day, our first day of summer vacations and last one together… the last time I saw you Donghae, I regret so much….
~*Flashback*~
- At Hyukjae house:
“Hyukkieee”
“What now Hae?”
“School’s over, let’s go on a trip”
“With who?”
“Just the two of us, common lets go to some place near the ocean”
“Don’t want to, I’m going to search for a time job, besides now I have time to conquer Hyoyeon”
“Why do you even try? You know she’s too much for you to handle Hyuk ahah”
“Thanks a lot for your support, such a great best friend I have *pouting* stupid fish -.-’ ”
“I’m kidding, and why do you even need the money?”
“If we want to go to college and rent a house for us we need money, it’s better to start getting some”
“I told you I already have some saved for that from my previous jobs”
“Still, let’s just stay here”
“Common Hyukkie, it will be fun. I never went on a trip and I really, but really want to feel the ocean, pweasseee? *puppy eyes* “
“Let me think about that. Now I want to take a walk to the park. Are you coming fishy?”
“Lets go monkey”
- Outside on their way :
“Hyuk, if someone confess to you now would you forget Hyoyeon and consider that person feelings?”
“Probably not, I like her too much, I think she’s the one, why? Do you know someone who likes me?”
“No, it was just a question that popped on my mind” -- Hae
“And how about you, when will you confess to the one you love? You’ve been hiding for so much time already” -- Hyuk
“I’m afraid that person will reject me, she doesn’t see me in that way”
“How do you know Hae? You must try, if she rejects you I will be by your side to make you happy”
“You promise?”
“I promise my cute fishy, you’re the most important person in my life” I said and we hugged
- Later at night:
From: handsomemonkey
To: cutefish
“I’m at the playground near your orphanage, I need to talk”
------
From: cutefish
To: handsomemonkey
“Ok, 10 minutes and I’ll be there”
-----
“Hyukkie *huge hug* “
“YAH! Why always so clingy? *frowning* “
“But you like my hugs so don’t complain! What do you want to talk?”
“I confessed to herHae, Hyoyeon said to give her time to think but I’m so happy!”
“And if she rejects you? You’re getting too much enthusiast and then she may hurt you”
“Thanks Hae for being so supportive -.-’ I love you too…not”
“You it’s not like that, I just don’t want you to get hurt!”
“Well at least I try, not like someone who is too chicken to take a risk and confess *smirk* ”
“Hey don’t need to be rude, I’m just worried”
“But you exaggerate it specially when it’s about girls. Are you jealous they get more attention from me than you get?” -- I hissed
“You’re right, I’m jealous so what? I’m used to be with you all the time”
“No wonder you don’t get any girl”
“That’s it, you went too far. Do you really want to know the truth? Fine, here’s the truth” *gives a kiss on Hyuks lips*
“YAH! *push Hae aside* are you crazy?!”
“ *shouting* you are the one I love, I realised my true feelings for you when we were 14 years old but you never saw me that way. It hurts to hear you talking about girls, crushes and who are the hottest girls, but it’s painful to be separated from you. Even now I’m terrified I will lose you but at least you know the true. Lee Hyukjae I love you!”
“………..”
“Say something, please” -- Donghae
“…………”
“HYUKKIE!”
“SHUT UP! You call yourself my best friend?! You’re lying right? Do I look like a to you? I can’t believe this is happening… I HATE YOU don’t ever appear in front of me again, ING !” -- I sail turning my back at you and leaving.
*In a whisper* “Hyukkie!”
~*End of Flashback*~
At that moment I didn’t realise how truly important you were to me. For the next month I didn’t looked for you, I started dating Hyoyeon but you never leaved my mind, it was so confusing, that electric feeling when you kissed me, I never felt it again.
After a month me and her broke up, I finally was aware of my true feelings towards you, the only one for me, the one who could make me happy when life was a , my support trough all things, my only best friend and the one I loved the most since childhood. REAL LOVE, not in a brotherly way.
It’s been 4 years since that fateful day. I stopped looking for you two years ago, I’ve tried to move on but no one can take your place. Since then my life has never been the same, somehow it feels that something important is missing and that something is you.
Even now that I miss you so much I came to the playground near your orphanage where we shared so many good moments and the last one too, sadly. I’m seeing a couple with a little child, maybe around age two, playing on the swing, they look so happy! If I had accepted you, would we be like them? Adopting a child and giving her all our love.
But somehow the guy seems familiar, I can’t see his face but his voice, so warm and smooth. He’s turning at my direction…OMO *gasp*…
IT’S YOU!!
BUT HOW??? WHERE WERE YOU ALL THIS TIME??
I’m screaming in my head, trembling, I can’t believe I finally found you only to lose you again. You have a family now and you look so happy with them.
Have you already forgotten me that easily? I still feel hurt without you but it seems you moved on.
I have to leave before you see me, I can’t face you now. I’m walking out of here, the tears are rolling down my face and like the last time we saw each other, your sweet voice reached my ears.
“H-Hyukkie?”
Goodbye Donghae!
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