Normal   Kyuhyun looked at his own reflection in the mirror and groaned. His lips were chapped, his eyes were red, and his skin was blotchy. He had been dry heaving all night, all the symptoms of a hangover, except it wasn't a hangover. Unless it was possible to have a hangover from a broken heart. He should have gotten over it by now, it's not like they broke up the night before. It had already been two months and twenty-three days, but who was counting? Okay, he was, but Yesung didn't seem phased by it at all. The senior went about his life without Kyuhyun. He was all smiles and sunshine while Kyuhyun could feel himself die slowly on the inside. Everyday Kyuhyun felt just a little bit emptier, a little bit colder. Yesung had been his only source of light for a year and now he craved it like a struggling plant craved the sun.   Kyuhyun traced his pale face with shaky fingers. It was Wednesday, he still had half a week of school to go. Three more days of slow motion torture in mind-numbing classes while he pretended not to be staring across the cafeteria at his ex-boyfriend during lunch time. He splashed icy cold water on his face to try to lessen the swelling of his puffy eyes and smeared on concealer. His father would tell him that “men don't wear make-up,” but his father was never dumped by Yesung. His father wouldn't have approved of him falling in love with another man either, but that was no longer an issue. Kyuhyun checked his reflection again and made a mental note to thank his sister for the concealer. At least he could try to look normal in class and avoid any unnecessary questions about how he was holding up. He wanted to appear normal. He wanted to feel normal again, but he would never be the same now that he was alone. Kyuhyun brushed his bangs low; half-shielding his eyes, half-shielding his soul.       Because of You   Careless, that was the only word that Kyuhyun could use for it. Yesung had caught him staring several times. He really wanted the earth to open up and swallow him whole when the handsome senior raised a quizzical eyebrow at him during lunchtime and flashed him a brilliant smile.   All Kyuhyun could do was sputter and choke on his carton of milk. Kyuhyun's best friend Eunhyuk had tried to comfort him. “Hey, no one else noticed.”   Sure, not even all the popular seniors that sat at Yesung's table because they were pointing, staring, and whispering. They were obviously gossiping about any other junior sitting at his table staring open-mouthed at the most popular singer in school. Yesung was his once, so why couldn't he stare? Kyuhyun tried to bolster his own confidence until a popular girl suddenly clung to Yesung's arm and started chatting away as if it were her natural place. Kyuhyun's natural place was the far side of the cafeteria, all alone. He felt exiled, even Eunhyuk's voice couldn't reach him anymore.   The rest of the day passed by in a haze, so much so that he didn't even notice the object of his affection approach him in the hallway until it was too late. A familiar husky voice called his name and Kyuhyun stopped dead in his tracks just in time not to crash into Yesung. They were too close as it was. Kyuhyun was looking down at a perfect heart-shaped face so close to his own that their noses were almost touching. He stumbled backwards hastily and tripped on his own feet. Small hands instinctively reached out and steadied him while a loud chuckle filled the air.   “Are you okay?” Yesung asked between gasps of laughter.   Kyuhyun looked down at the older boy and flushed, “Y-yeah.”   He couldn't help himself when Yesung was so close, he allowed his eyes to linger a bit longer. The same eyes that creased into half moon shapes when amused, the y curve of lips that used to fit perfectly on his own, and the warm laugh that washed over him so completely it made him shiver. He missed Yesung so much, he was like rain on a parched summer's day. Kyuhyun needed him so much that his voice went dry. Yesung released him as soon as he was steady and the loss of warmth was so sudden Kyuhyun had to clench his hands into fists in order not to grab back onto those hands.   “You're looking good.”   “T-thanks,” Kyuhyun smacked himself in the face mentally. He didn't want to stutter every time his ex-boyfriend spoke to him.   Yesung stared at him with an unreadable expression and Kyuhyun smiled nervously.   “Are you mad at me?” Yesung asked softly.   “I would never!” Kyuhyun exclaimed while shaking his head.   “Then why haven't I seen you at choir practice?”   “Ah, I...well, I'm not feeling very well.” he croaked hoarsely. It wasn't exactly a lie, he hadn't been quite himself since their break-up.   “You do sound a little hoarse, but you could still show up for practice!” Yesung scolded. “I miss hearing your voice.”   Kyuhyun felt his face burn with embarrassment, “My voice is nothing like yours.”   “That's why we compliment each other so well,” Yesung said so softly that Kyuhyun wondered if he had imagined it. “Well, I expect to see you there after school tomorrow. Don't forget!”   “Sure thing...Yesung-hyung.”   Yesung then left just as suddenly as he had appeared and Kyuhyun was left in a daze.   In truth, he wasn't sure if he could face Yesung at choir practice, it would be too much time together in the same room. At least they wouldn't be alone, but his heart still carried a dull ache. He wasn't confident that he'd be able to hide it for more than five minutes.   When Eunhyuk came to meet with Kyuhyun after classes that day he found the taller boy banging his head against his own metal locker.   “What the hell are you doing?!”   Kyuhyun turned to his best friend with tears in his eyes, “Hyuk, I'm an idiot.”   “Yes, I already knew that.” Eunhyuk wrapped an arm around Kyuhyun's waist and walked him home.       Fix Me   Friday, two months and twenty-five days apart, but now he was going to torment himself with Yesung's presence at choir practice. He threw up the remnants of his dinner and checked his reflection in the mirror. There were dark shadows under his eyes and his cheeks were beginning to hollow out. This was not good, he really needed to do something about his queasy stomach. All the concealer in the world wouldn't be able to hide his sickly pallor. Kyuhyun flopped back onto his bed and considered skipping school. Then he would have a whole weekend to avoid making a fool of himself in front of Yesung again, but he promised to go to practice.   Kyuhyun groaned and dug the heels of his hands into his eyes. His vision blurred with the pressure and he kept his eyes closed for a few moments more. Darkness spread and sleep claimed him, casting him into memories he had tried to forget. The sound of the ocean, the feeling of a warm hand in his own, a smile, a kiss... He woke up with a start as his second alarm clock went blaring off. Kyuhyun was going to be late