Taemin isn't a big gamer, he's not that interested in gaming or games in general, but one day he gets a suggestion (from an ad) to play this game that's going around. It’s sort of a survival game but the tasks are more intricate than a typical game and he thinks it looks interesting, the graphics are cool and so on, let me try it out just for fun.

From the start he's casual about it. When he makes his choices, he's thinking who cares, it’s just a game, I don't have to overthink it. Choosing his abilities, he goes with what sounds cool even though it's not the strongest and so on. The game prompts "what is your name?" and he knows it’s for the character, but just inputs his own name bc it’s simple. Then it asks if he wants to do gameplay mode or real mode, and he doesn't really know what that means, but real mode sounds cooler so he chooses that. The next one of the choices is what team he wants to be on. Taemin chooses randomly as well because he likes the team colour, not really paying attention although his choice means he will be a killer. Then he begins.

The game is kind of strange. It starts by asking him if he has a partner, and he says he does so his character can match real life, but then the game never shows a partner for his character and he wonders what the point was then, but he plays along anyway, thinking it could come into play later. Following his role, he goes around killing bad characters only. However, as he meets others from his team, they tell him he has to just kill anyone or there will be consequences. It sounds eerie, but since he's new his powers aren't that strong anyway and he wants to build them up first, he ignores their direction and focuses on himself.

After his first week of playing with no kills, he gets a warning to make a kill or he will lose his partner – to which he's very confused, as he hasn't even seen them all game anyway – so who cares? It’s not a powerful threat, so he doesn't make a kill and the next day he gets a notification that they're gone in the game. Then, when he finishes playing that day, he goes to meet his real-life partner, who tells him he hasn't been paying attention to them lately and they want to break up with him.

This is of course upsetting – they’d been together a few months, but he’d been comfortable in the relationship and feels a bit blindsided by the sudden ending. After that he's too sad to play for a while, spending days sitting sadly in his dark apartment; but then finally he decides it, he already lost them so he might as well play now. Maybe he could at least do something right in the game world. He logs back on and his teammates are like finally back huh, to which he explains that his partner broke up with him. In response, they say, yeah, we told you to kill or things would happen. Figuring they’re confused, Taemin clarifies that he meant his real-life partner, to which they just say right... Before going back to convincing him to make kills.

Finally, Taemin tries to use his powers to make his first kill – he's some type of wizard, so he can do cool spells unlike most players, and he uses a spell to kill the other character. Then his screen reads, "[Player] died of a heart attack," to which Taemin can only think I HIT YOU WITH THAT SPELL AND YOU DIED FROM A HEART ATTACK??? But whatever, he killed someone. It boosts his skills and rank up a level, so he feels better.

He uses the game to feel better about his ex, playing and getting better, and making kills occasionally though not too often. He learns a wind spell and blows someone off a building, and it says they died falling from a high height. He learns a fire spell and it says they died in a fire. He always finds the cause of death slightly strange, but thinks maybe it's just a strange translation. Sometimes people beg him not to kill them and he feels bad, so he doesn't, usually just taking out newbies so as not to destroy older players’ progress.

As he progresses though, Taemin ends up getting a message that he needs to kill more experienced players, and newbies will no longer improve his scores, so he starts looking for them instead. The rest of his team have been directed similarly though, making it harder to find the higher levels. After six days without killing, he gets a message again to kill or he is going to have something that would cripple him. He's worried about this, and ends up finding someone but they beg him again not to kill them. When he apologetically explains his situation, they tell him they'll die if he kills them. Yeah, duh, he replies, but it's just a game. They say it's not, but before Taemin can say anymore, one of his teammates swoops in and steals the kill.

Taemin’s pissed because he's out of time now, but tells himself not to get so invested – he doesn’t want to be like those other characters who take it so seriously and act like it affects their real life. So he goes out drinking the next night to get his mind off it, ending up a little too drunk and falling, hitting his head and giving himself a concussion. He wakes up in the hospital but is okay, just confused and experiencing slight head trauma – dizziness, confusion, and so on.

When he goes home he tries to play, only to find his character was poisoned for not killing and is suffering heavily, unable to play properly. Taemin can't tell if it's the game or his own head (or both), but he struggles to control the character, can't cast spells properly, even his characters vision is warped. He decides to turn the game off until he's better, resting for a couple days.

The next time he comes back, he has a warning that he needs to kill again within 24 hours, and he thinks it's not fair for them to count the days he hadn't played. His teammates just say that the game doesn't stop just bc he isn't there, but Taemin thinks they're all too addicted. They tell him something bad will happen again if he doesn't kill, and he tries but he can't find anyone and he ends up failing again. When he wakes up in the morning, he has an urgent call from his brother that their mom was in the hospital after something critical happened, so he obviously goes to visit her, forgetting all about his silly game worries.

She's in a teetering state, seeming like it could go either way, and Taemin feels very stressed. Still, that night he goes home, planning just to log on and say he can't come in for a bit because of his mom, when he sees a new message. His character has received a letter from home saying his mother has fallen ill, and he is suffering from heartbreak. This gives Taemin chills, finding it a little too close to home. He wants to talk to his teammates, but he also thinks it sounds crazy – as if a game could somehow influence his life. Still, the next mission is to find the person who has the cure to his character’s mother’s illness and get it from them – by the end of the week. He knows what will happen if not, and it leaves him shaken as he fears that failing in the game might somehow affect his life for real. As a result, he starts working hard to find this person, spending days on it.

His brother gets pissed that Taemin would rather play games at home than be with their sick mother, but Taemin promises it's for a good reason. His brother doesn't believe it in the slightest; still, Taemin plays on, and on the fourth day he finally finds the person he needs, asking for the cure. They refuse to give it to him - it's all that's keeping them alive. So he fights them for it and ends up getting it, sending it off to his character’s home village. The next day he gets a message: his character’s mother has started to get better. Meanwhile, the other character he stole from has died – from the same thing his real mother is sick with. The whole thing makes Taemin feel ill, more so after he goes to the hospital and finds his mom starting to recover, when she had been getting worse and worse each day. It’s wonderful of course, but he can’t help having a sickly feeling about the parallels with the game.

When he plays again, he sees he has another week to kill, with the threat of something new happening in case of failure. After two days he finds someone, and once again they beg him not to kill them. He plans to anyway, but then they tell him something terrifying. "It's real. If you kill me, I die in real life."

Taemin’s blood runs cold as it occurs to him that all the similarities between he and his character could be the same with other people and theirs. Then he starts to think about all the character death descriptions that seemed oddly different from how he killed them, getting a horrible feeling that they could have been how the characters’ players died. Seeming to sense his shock, the other character asks where he is, finding out they live in the same city, and asks to meet up. They log off and go to a meeting place immediately – knowing there’s not much time.

 They meet up, and truthfully, Taemin expects someone nerdy. So he's surprised when he sees this guy who looks like a model walk in and ask if he's Taemin. The other admits that Taemin isn't what he expected either, but somehow his voice still matches his appearance – which Taemin doesn't understand but chooses not to question. They order drinks and the guy – whose name is Jongin – tells Taemin about how he's terrified of the game, how things keep happening to him in real life if he doesn't complete his game missions, and how one of his friends died in real life the day his character got killed in the game. Taemin is silent, processing, and Jongin says he knows it seems insane but he's not lying. Taemin promises he believes him, explaining the things he's experienced too and admitting he's freaked out about it, saying they should stop playing. However, Jongin tells him if they quit before they finish all their missions, they die. He's heard other players tell him, and he's not risking anything.

At this, Taemin asks how Jongin thinks he should keep playing when his missions are all killing people. Jongin admits that he doesn't know, that the whole thing is horrible. Then he asks Taemin’s level, which is 30, and tells him he only has to get to 100. Taemin doesn't find this very comforting, but Jongin tells him to just kill as little as possible and level up as fast as he can to get through, before asking why he even chose a killer role anyway. Taemin replies that he didn't know, he had just thought the character seemed cool and it was supposed to be a game. Jongin is sympathetic then, asking next if Taemin can help him in any way. Taemin says he has some potions and can cast protective spells – which he's done for teammates before, and agrees to help Jongin stay alive (as he's only a level 17 and has a lot farther to go).

After this, the next time they play they are listed as friends, Jongin asking if Taemin had added him, but Taemin doesn't even know how to add people as friends. It makes him uncomfortable, but he tries not to think too much about it, deciding to not get too close to Jongin in case the game tries to use their friendship against him somehow. Still, Taemin works hard to disguise Jongin’s character, using an invisibility spell as he works on creating a uniform similar to his own character. They travel together, Jongin proving to be a good helper and making things a lot easier than working alone.

A couple weeks after they meet, another player attacks Jongin’s hideout, though he isn't there at the time. Taemin brings him into his own shelter, feeling its safer to keep him there where it's protected by magic. The next day; a storm hits their city, and Jongin messages by phone to say that his power was knocked out and he won't be able to play. Taemin offers to him to come over, since his place is fine, so Jongin hauls his laptop over.

Something about having someone there while he plays is comforting to Taemin, and he also feels better having Jongin somewhere he can really see him too, so he suggests playing together more often. Jongin agrees, both of them feeling a little better about everything. Eventually Jongin logs off and says he's heading back home, though Taemin asks if he'll really be okay. The storm has died down though, and Jongin says he's just going to sleep anyway so he won't need power even if it's not back. When he heads home, he finds its been fixed, so there's nothing to worry about. From then on though, Jongin visiting Taemin’s house to play together becomes their norm, and keeping a distance between them friend-wise becomes that much harder. Still, Taemin prefers having him close in real life too, feeling like it's easier to protect him (even if that doesn't make sense).

At first they just focus on playing, but as time passes, they sometimes order food before they play, and spend time talking with each other, getting to know one another. Jongin is younger, Taemin learns, and still a student. He's pretty quiet besides when they talk about the game, but sometimes he makes jokes or prods into Taemin’s life too – what does Taemin do for fun, besides this? Does he work? Go on dates? Taemin admits how he was never interested in games, mostly a homebody who liked to read and occasionally find pretty cafes (also to read in). He could only laugh when asked about dating, admitting he'd been seeing someone when he started the game, but they'd broken up as punishment for failing a mission. He acknowledges that it was his first relationship in years, and they'd been together months, but in hindsight he was happy to be single again – if the game killed him, he wouldn't have to have someone mourning their relationship. When he asks Jongin, Jongin notes that he's single too, and similarly not planning to look until he can finish this game.

One of the times Jongin comes over to Taemin’s house to play, they end up staying up very late, past midnight, trying to complete a mission, and by the time they get through its nearly two in the morning. Taemin says Jongin can stay the night there, since the trains will all be done for the night and a cab would be too expensive now. He tells him his bed is big enough and he can borrow his clothes even if they're a bit small, if Jongin doesn't find that weird. Jongin seems hesitant, but Taemin says he just would feel bad to make him sleep on the floor. Then Jongin admits that he's gay, and he doesn't want to make Taemin uncomfortable with that. Taemin is surprised – Jongin isn't someone he'd expect to be gay; but then, he wouldn't expect him to game either. He decides he doesn't mind, as long as Jongin doesn't try anything (which he promises he would never do).

They go to bed, and Jongin admits that one of the reasons he likes gaming is because he can be another character and not have to worry about people judging him or questioning him – unlike in real life, where everyone is always questioning how he's single and why. He doesn't have to worry about hiding things, because he likes team games where he just has to do his tasks well and no one asks questions. Taemin finds the insight interesting, though he feels sad that Jongin chose this game in hopes of escaping to a better life, and now it’s just made his real life worse. He promises not to tell anyone, and they go to sleep.

One day when they're playing in their own places, and they've gotten pretty far with Taemin past level 50, Jongin nearly ends up getting killed by someone while Taemin briefly left him. Jongin screams for help, and Taemin runs back to him, finding him almost dead and quickly healing him before attacking the enemy. They flee, and Jongin says he's logging off – he can't handle this anymore, he's literally living in fear of this stupid game and he'll never get out. The way he says it is very ominous, and when Taemin tries to call him by phone he doesn't answer. Taemin rushes to Jongin’s house, and has to let himself in when he doesn't open the door, finding the other bleeding from his wrists and lying on his couch. Taemin panics but hurries to try and bandage his injuries, taking care of him and having to stay overnight to make sure he's alright. He ends up crying, and Jongin has to apologize, saying he's so overwhelmed that he can't handle it, but Taemin says he hasn't been working this hard to keep Jongin alive just for him to end things himself. Then Taemin makes him promise to get through it with him, and Jongin reluctantly agrees.

Later that night, Jongin notes that Taemin saved him from death, just like he had in the game, realizing real life was once again reflecting their characters. He tells Taemin, "You're all that's keeping me alive..." and Taemin says he's delirious and needs to sleep. When he does, Taemin stays beside him and keeps watch until he falls asleep, the couch as his pillow.

Growing closer is inevitable after that, Taemin asking Jongin to come over whenever he wants to play, not letting him play alone. It always feels worse when they're apart, or when he's by himself, so Taemin can imagine Jongin is experiencing something similar. They often play at night though, and Jongin says he feels bad about crashing at Taemin’s so much. On the contrary, Taemin tells him to bring some pajamas and things to keep at his place, saying he's welcome anytime. Taemin can't deny their friendship anymore, and it only makes him that much more desperate to finish the game before it does anything to either of them.

Each level is harder than the last and takes longer to complete though. It takes nearly four months after meeting Jongin for Taemin to reach level 60 (having spent less than two months to get to 30), Jongin reaching 50 not long after. Taking care of Jongin probably is slowing him down, he realizes, but Taemin doesn't really mind that. Jongin is becoming his part-time roommate at this point, as they play as often as they can, and Taemin finds him easy to be around. He finds himself imagining the days when they're free from it all and can do things besides just game – Taemin could show him his favourite cafes, and they could hang out like real friends.

Jongin must have been feeling more comfortable with Taemin too, because one morning Taemin wakes up to find Jongin curled up behind him, his arm thrown over Taemin’s waist and their bodies very close. Taemin doesn't really mind at first, but then he remembers that Jongin is gay. He gently untangles them then, not mentioning it when Jongin wakes up but reminding himself internally to keep space. He doesn't want to give Jongin the wrong ideas. But it happens again, and a few times more, and eventually Taemin stops moving Jongin’s arm away – they've already slept that way all night, what difference does it make at that point? Especially as the weather gets colder, Taemin finds himself less eager to move away anyway. Jongin doesn't say or do anything to show he's interested, so Taemin isn't too concerned. Instead, they both seem to be taking comfort in the intimacy they're otherwise lacking, too absorbed in the game now to be around anyone else and having only each other.

Gradually, Jongin’s intentions become less clear though. Sometimes he leans against Taemin when they're beside one another, and he touches Taemin more often – small things, like touching his arm while they're speaking, or putting a hand on his thigh when they're on the couch. It never goes further, and never feels like he's trying to initiate things, so Taemin can't tell if it means anything or if it's just Jongin’s natural behaviour coming out as he gets more comfortable. But then Jongin comes over on Christmas eve, admitting he doesn't want to play but just came to see Taemin, asking if he'd like to go for some hot chocolate. Taemin is hesitant because he doesn't want them to act like normal friends, but ultimately agrees as he's hardly been able to go out lately and needs a break from his own house.

They go and things are fine, there are a lot of other couples and it feels a little romantic which amuses Taemin. But he pays more attention to Jongin’s charms, imagining how he would be to date and thinking he'd make a good boyfriend for a lucky girl (guy, his mind corrects). When they return Taemin suggests they watch a movie. He falls asleep close to the end, and when it's over Jongin debates waking him up, but decides not to and just gently carries him to his bed. Taemin wakes up when he's put down, finding Jongin leaning over him and feeling very disoriented. This has Jongin apologizing, promising he wasn't doing anything and had just brought Taemin to bed. Then he shyly asks if he can stay, and Taemin accepts it, changing into his own pajamas as Jongin does the same.

They get into bed, Taemin rolling onto it sleepily and rolling right into Jongin, apologizing as he hadn't realized Jongin was so close. When he glances up, Jongin is even closer than he anticipated, and they just stare at each other in surprise for a moment. The moment feels oddly intimate; maybe after their date-like evening Taemin’s mind is confused, he thinks – and maybe Jongin’s is too, because suddenly he leans in and Taemin freezes up. For just a split second he almost feels inclined to lean in too, but then he pulls back and whispers that they shouldn't. "Because of…" He doesn't finish his sentence, terrified of the game somehow knowing, and Jongin catches on. Jongin wonders why Taemin said that rather than just rejecting him - isn't Taemin straight? Taemin wonders the same, feeling strange but not letting himself worry about it. He won’t get closer with Jongin, he tells himself. It’s too dangerous.

They have bigger problems anyway. The game is getting harder, and as it's been all along, when something happens to their characters, it reflects on them. When Jongin’s character is injured, he ends up slicing his hand open while trying to cut some food; Taemin ends up tripping on some stairs and spraining his ankle after his character takes a beating in the game, although it's not too serious (as he can heal himself in the game; he just rests and keeps his weight off it for a few days). The missions become harder too – for him, he has to battle higher- and higher-ranking opponents, the lower ones doing little to nothing to boost his score anymore. It's anxiety-inducing, having to stay on edge whenever he plays as he doesn't know when someone will jump out and challenge him – the higher his level, the greater a target he becomes too, as there are fewer and fewer people in the same bracket. It translates in real life, as he's endlessly anticipating something to happen to him to correspond with whatever damage he incurred while playing – sometimes it comes, sometimes it doesn't.

It reaches a point where he is granted time off work because he's clearly too stressed to do anything properly. He decides to take this time to finish the game, spending as much time as he can playing and bringing Jongin over as often as he can too. Jongin starts skipping school so they can get through it, and after a week they've both pushed through to level 90.

After that, they decide to take a break for a few days, going on vacation somewhere nice – since they might never have another chance. For a few days, they're able to be happy and normal, and Taemin realizes Jongin really is great to be around – he's a good friend, and they have natural chemistry (platonically). It makes him a little sad that they met through this game that might end up killing them both, but Taemin feels glad to have met him at all, seeing it as the silver lining of this sickeningly black cloud.

He tells Jongin as much, that he's glad they met and he hopes they'll be able to do this again in the future. Jongin’s a little quiet, but then agrees that he's glad they met too. There's something in the way he says it that worries Taemin – he's not stupid, and he can read people well; he has to wonder if there isn't more to Jongin’s words, but then he realizes he's just jumping to conclusions and making assumptions just because Jongin is gay. He realizes he sounds just as sentimental, and there's no reason for it to be strange – they're both in a difficult situation, emotions are high, and their only comfort is in each other.

“I just want this game to be over,” Jongin says, and Taemin can’t agree more.

When they get back from their trip, Taemin decides to focus on getting Jongin through the game. If Taemin completes it first, it will be harder for Jongin to finish alone, but Taemin can take care of himself without Jongin. It takes a couple more weeks, but they push him through to level 99, pulling an all-nighter until they finally see the message. Congratulations, you’ve reached Level 100! Would you like to continue freeplay?

Jongin saves and shuts down with a cry of relief, bursting into tears as he is finally free. All Taemin can do in response is log off himself, hugging the younger and quietly celebrating in his victory. Thank God, he thinks. At least one of us is safe. Taemin is up to 94, knowing he’ll be able to work faster now that he only has himself to look after. Still, Jongin promises to stay with him while he plays as often as he can, wanting to make sure Taemin is safe until the end.

Taemin doesn’t always tell him when he plays, knowing it’s hard on his friend – emotionally, as well as physically, since Taemin plays for hours on end, trying to get it over with. But it’s the most dangerous it’s ever been, Taemin practically a walking target in the game now as his level is so high. He still avoids killing, but gets attacked often and is left with little choice at times, being hurt and having no other way out. When he ends up hurt in real life, breaking his wrist slipping in the shower one night after sustaining damage on an evening of playing alone, Jongin knows what he’s done. He begs Taemin not to play alone anymore, knowing how quick the damage can catch up to him in real life and not wanting him to be by himself if there’s anything more severe. After that, Taemin asks if Jongin would stay at his place permanently until he’s done, and Jongin agrees wholeheartedly.

The stress gets to him. When he’s level 97, he fends off back-to-back attacks for nearly four hours one night, finally reaching safety and logging off before breaking down. He’s shaking so badly he can’t even hold a drink to hydrate himself, collapsing in front of his fridge and sobbing, despite how he’s tried to keep up a strong image in front of Jongin. This time, Jongin is the one comforting him, picking him up and bringing him to his bed so he can be more comfortable. Taemin clings to him, unashamed in how desperate he is because it’s too much and he isn’t sure he can do this.

“I want to quit,” he confesses, and Jongin soothes him, assuring he’s almost there and he won’t have to do this anymore soon. But Taemin isn’t sure he can take it, and he knows if he stops playing then bad things will happen – to the people around him, including Jongin. It’s unbearable, and he has the painful desire to just end it all so that he doesn’t have to deal with it. He doesn’t tell Jongin as much, knowing it would be hypocritical when he’d once convinced Jongin not to do the very same.

There’s a moment when he can’t take it anymore though. He’s at level 99, and as he fights against an opponent, he nearly ends up killing his own character while taking them out. Taemin screams in panic, narrowly escaping with his life, though he’s thankfully unharmed. Still, it’s the mental break that pushes him over the edge, logging off and going to the kitchen for a knife. Jongin chases after him, begging him to put it down before risking it and grabbing the weapon himself. He puts it aside, and pulls Taemin into his arms, both breaking down in tears as Taemin says he can’t handle it. Jongin says he’s almost there, he just needs a little bit more, but Taemin tells him it’s literally killing him and it’s just not worth it. But Jongin begs him – please, he asks, please finish this, for me…

It makes Taemin realize – if he loses to the game, it will hurt Jongin, not to mention his other friends and family. But ending his own life will hurt them just as much – and that would be his own fault. Even though Jongin was safe now, he would still be affected, could still get hurt. Taemin’s only option is to finish, for the sake of both of them.

I don’t know if I can. He voices this, and Jongin takes his face in his hands, looking him in the eyes and promising him that he can. “You have to,” Jongin tells him. “I need you to…” And he looks as desperate as Taemin feels, only further admitting, I need you…

Something hits Taemin when he hears it, realizing just how close they’ve become. It feels like another reflection of the game – because Jongin had always needed Taemin; he wouldn’t have made it through without him, Taemin was almost sure. But something was different, because Taemin feels like he needs Jongin too. He wants Jongin there. When this is all over, he wants to leave the game behind, but he doesn’t want to lose Jongin to the past.

Taemin doesn’t know how to word this, his head a mess of emotions. Perhaps as a result of not being able to think clearly, he closes the space between them and kisses Jongin. He’s not sure why he does it, and Jongin is undoubtedly taken aback, but he returns the kiss anyway, laced with desperation, pulling him closer and holding him like they’ll both break if he lets go. When they finally do part, Taemin can only beg, please don’t leave me. Jongin promises to see it through to the end with him, pulling Taemin to bed and holding him tight for the rest of the night.

The next time Taemin plays, he’s determined to finish. His final task seems impossible though – defeat someone of his own level or higher. Higher? There was undoubtedly no such player, but he goes around searching for someone at the end like him. Eventually, he finds someone – a level 100, who for some reason is still playing. He challenges them, and it’s painstakingly close – they nearly finish him, but his final blow is enough to defeat them – and let him win.

When the congratulatory message pops up, Taemin doesn’t even see it. His vision goes white, then black, his body failing him. Jongin saves the game on his behalf, hurrying to log off before patting Taemin’s cheek. Taemin doesn’t stir, and panic starts to creep in. He calls an ambulance, continuing to try to wake Taemin until they arrive. They ask if he’s been using any drugs, but Jongin explains how he collapsed after completing a game. Taemin is taken to the hospital, given care and waking an hour or so later. After he does, the nurses ask for details of what happened, taking note and saying how they’ve had others coming in talking about strange consequences of playing video games.

Taemin promises he won’t be playing anymore, probably ever again.

He’s let out in the morning, Jongin bringing him home. After confirming that he’s completed the game, Taemin uninstalls it from his computer, tempted to burn the whole thing down. It’s over, he tells himself, feeling some of the weight finally lift. Some of it, he knows, will stay with him forever – all the lives that ended because of him. But that pain can be dealt with later; for now, he needs to let himself feel the relief of being free.

Jongin is still there, sitting, watching as Taemin stares at his reflection in the black screen. He doesn’t speak when Taemin finally looks to him, but they share a wordless glance of relief. It’s over.

“We’re safe,” Taemin says at last, Jongin slowly nodding. Then, to Taemin’s surprise, Jongin asks if he should go. Go? Jongin knows the game is done, not wanting to overstay, saying he’s already pushed some boundaries, but Taemin doesn’t know what he’s talking about. He tells Jongin he wants him to stay, needs him to. He feels like he’s going to fall apart any second, and he needs Jongin to hold him together.

Not literally, Jongin prompts lightly, but Taemin returns that he wouldn’t mind it literally, joining Jongin on the couch and holding out his arms. Jongin opens his own, pulling Taemin into him and holding him tightly for a long while. Taemin clings just as tightly back, crying into Jongin’s shoulder for a while as the stress leaves his body. Eventually he pushes Jongin to lie down, not letting go as he lays on top of him and falls asleep from being so drained.

When he wakes again, Taemin finds Jongin slowly his hair, apologizing under his breath when he realizes Taemin’s awake. Taemin wonders what he’s sorry for, and Jongin merely says he doesn’t want to push any further boundaries. For a moment, Taemin is confused, but he’s reminded once again that Jongin is gay, and this could seem to intimate to him.

Push them, Taemin responds. Please… Jongin returns to running his fingers through his hair, but Taemin takes it a step further and leans in to kiss him instead. For a second, he feels fear as he worries how the game could get between them, but then he remembers that they’re both free from it now, kissing Jongin more fervently in the relief it gives him.

Jongin eventually pulls back, asking what’s happening, and Taemin admits that he doesn’t know. They’ve grown close, and now that there’s nothing looming over them, Taemin’s feelings flow freely – and there are so many for Jongin. He doesn’t understand them all, but they come out strong as they’re released from their bonds, and Taemin doesn’t want to have to care or sort them out right now. They don’t have to figure one thing out to reach the next step – they aren’t playing a game anymore, and Taemin realizes that it’s their choices now that don’t matter, or at least, don’t have to be perfect. Things will fall into place over time, but right now he just wants to let his feelings guide him, rather than following a formula.

I want you, he confesses. I want you here, with me. Not to leave. To stay, to let everything they were feeling lead them where it may.

This time, Jongin is kissing Taemin, confessing the very same. He had wanted Taemin, for a long time now. And if Taemin might have objected to it before, he doesn’t let anything hold him back now. He’s a different person after the game, and he refuses to be confined – by labels, opinions, or any ideas. Meeting Jongin had been some sort of twisted fate, the only good takeaway, and Taemin realizes how much he wants to experience more, live more.

With Jongin. Because they had kept each other alive – and for what? They’re bonded, and Taemin isn’t taking Jongin for granted now that they’ve won.

He lets Jongin kiss him, lets Jongin’s hands roam over him, lets his own hands do the same to Jongin’s. Taemin lets them get closer than ever, assures Jongin that he has no boundaries for him now, at least not tonight. He lets Jongin in, erases all the space between them, and experiences real joy, pleasure, euphoria for the first time since he logged into that game.

And tomorrow, he’ll let them do it all over again, promising himself to live the best life he can allow himself from then on – and knowing that will include Jongin.

 

 

Author's Note: This felt a little rushed towards the end (maybe just in my mind), but if I wrote it out, I would be more thorough! I've also got thoughts of a sequel, one that could focus on the relationship that blooms between them (and also shows the trauma they live with), while also maybe showing the way the game becomes more prominent in the public eye - gradually raising more suspicion, and the way Taemin and Jongin would contribute to solving the mystery. That is all still a blurry cloud in my mind for now, though!

If, however, you've enjoyed this or would like to see this much turned into a full version, please let me know! I always love and appreciate feedback, and take comfort in knowing people might be enjoying what I write as much as I do ♡