before you start reading, note that there's a double update this week! 

so remember to read part 3 before you read this part, part 4! enjoy :-) 

part the fourth | what it took to understand

“Wait Mom, what do you mean you’re not coming? Aren’t you flying in on Friday?”

“He didn’t tell you? Youngho-ah, you’re scaring me.”

“What wouldn’t he tell me?”

“Doyoung just called, he called to tell us that there isn’t going to be a wedding. He even apologized and said he would pay for our tickets and return the gifts. I told him there’s no need to, but he insisted. The poor boy kept thanking us for being concerned about him. He said he’s okay, but how can he be, John-ah? He was with her for 13 years.

“Oh sweetie, I can’t even imagine what his parents must be feeling right now. What’s going on? The wedding’s supposed to happen this Saturday. Was it wedding jitters? What happened between them? They were so good together, I can’t imagine what must’ve happened for them to break it off…”

It’s the fourth time his call has gone straight to voicemail, and Johnny gnashes his teeth in frustration. He quickly cancels the call via the touchscreen on his dashboard, sighing exasperatedly as he leans his elbow against the inside of the car door, his fingers in his previously neatly-gelled hair.

“He’s not answering any of my calls…”

“Johnny, calm down.”

“I can’t calm down!” His eyes are wild with worry, as he swerves into the next lane, his hand pressing firmly against the wheel, “Doyoung’s phone is never switched off. You can call him at 3am and he’ll pick up, that’s the kind of person he is. His phone is never switched off!”

Haewon falls silent, listening as Johnny takes a deep breath.

“I’m sorry for snapping. I know you must be worried too.” He sighs again, biting his bottom lip. “He’s in hiding, Haewon. It’s not him, he doesn’t go MIA. The only time he was like this was a week before graduation, he suddenly went missing because he was panicking about the future and stuff.”

“Then it’ll be fine, he’ll pick himself up like he did before.”

Despite what she says, Haewon isn’t that sure. For the longest time, Inhee has been an irreplaceable constant in Doyoung’s life, someone who grounds him and takes care of him. It’s difficult to wrap the mind around the space she would leave in Doyoung’s life amongst the burnt shrapnel of their relationship, but it’s not completely unimaginable. Her mind inadvertently teeters between two possible reasons that led him to such a decision - one absolutely selfish, the other utterly heartbreaking.

“Why do you look like that?”

Haewon stills. “What do I look like?”

Johnny regards her suspiciously as he signals a right turn. “… I thought you said you didn’t tell him about Inhee.”

An omission of the truth is still a lie, the voice in her head tells her. When Johnny had asked her that night if she had told Doyoung about Inhee’s affair, she had shaken her head, said she was tired and then locked herself in her room until she fell asleep, her eyes still warm with tears. Subsequently, Johnny didn’t ask anything else, but she couldn’t bring herself to tell him that she had confessed and just how badly it had gone.

No one else knows this, but Haewon can’t bring herself to be pathetic in front of Johnny. She refuses to cry in front of Johnny, refuses to tell him about what happened that Monday. It’s not that she doesn’t trust Johnny, in fact, she trusts him too much, but she can’t tell him in the crippling fear of seeing that look on his face - the same look that had settled on his face when it registered that she was in love with his friend, the dimming of the light in his eyes in a moment of poorly-concealed sympathy. Johnny, who  vowed to be her ‘rock, [her] absolute rock’, who has really lived up to his promise and been her rock for three and a half years - he’s not someone she wants to ever let down.

Moreover, while it is entirely possible that she could just be projecting and overthinking, what Doyoung had said the day she had tendered her resignation still clung like barnacles to her thoughts, making her mind whirl with unending possibilities.

“I didn’t, I’m just thinking about what might have happened.” She says against the mouth of her water bottle, gulping down to prevent other words from spilling out.

Johnny habitually chews on his lip in thought. “Maybe he realized he was in love with you- oh my God Haewon, are you okay?!”

Haewon laughs uneasily as she tries to hold back violent coughs and wipes .

“Wait, so… He did?!” Johnny raises both eyebrows.

“Of course not! What are you saying?!”

“Fine! Then don’t choke in my car!”

Johnny finally hears from Doyoung on Friday morning, the day before he’s supposed to get married. Needless to say, the conversation between them is somewhat chaotic, with Doyoung jokingly asking questions like, “aren’t you supposed to be in London at this time?” and Johnny stuttering an excuse before yelling, “ya! Don’t change the subject when we’re talking about you!” A smile finds itself on Haewon’s face as she listens quietly to their on-speaker conversation in the car, Johnny’s hands on the steering wheel as he drives both of them to work.

Doyoung had found his fiancée and her lover in the shower together when he had returned home at an unexpected time the previous Friday, an undeniably and surprisingly drama-like scenario. In a moment inspired by the swashbuckling protagonists Doyoung had read about growing up, he chose to face the incident with dignity and hero-like placidity, looking at Inhee dead in the eye and factually stating, “it’s over between us”.

As worrying as it is, it’s good to know that Doyoung’s safe. Upon breaking off the engagement and making all the necessary arrangements, Doyoung had returned to Guri for a week to spend time with his parents and attend to his personal and wedding cancelation matters, closing a chapter of his life as Haewon opens another of hers.

“When did he say he’ll be back?” Haewon asks now, watching Johnny loosen his tie as he crosses his legs and relaxes in the chair after dinner.

“He said tomorrow, but he isn’t sure.”

She nods pensively, on the Melona ice pop in her hand.

A glint of mischief enters Johnny’s eyes, and he leans forward in his seat, resting his elbows on his thighs.

“Haewonnie, once he returns… It’s your chance.”

Upon safely locating Doyoung, Johnny had lapsed into his ‘y’all should get together’ rhetoric, encouraging Haewon to ‘seize the opportunity’, since it seems that life has presented her with a second chance. Haewon doesn’t have the heart to tell Johnny how she had actually taken her shot, the attempt collapsing lifelessly around her a couple of weeks ago and making her vow never to try again.

Instead, she brings her feet up against the couch, wrapping her arms around her knees and questions, “why do you want us to get together anyway?”

“What do you mean?”

“You’ve been rooting for this for the longest time, and you’re his friend.”

Johnny rolls his eyes, “please, I’m definitely being the good friend. Sure, maybe I hated Inhee and didn’t think she was deserving of Doyoung by any measure, but you know what would be even more deplorable?”

Haewon hums dismissively, twirling the red wine in her glass.

“Not bringing soulmates together.”

“You can’t be serious.”

He shrugs. “Besides, you guys have, like the worst taste in partners. The only way to ensure that you don’t continue ing up in your love lives is to get together.”

“I do not!”

Johnny sits up in attention, crossing his legs on the ottoman. “Let’s not even talk about the guy who literally made you run away from him to Korea- What about the guy who made you do his laundry? And landline guy? Huh? Not to mention - mansplaining broker guy who cried when you guys had …”

“You heard that?!”

Johnny isn’t done. “The guy who cheated on you AND stole your money???”

“Okay fine, but in my defense… I mean, I didn’t really love any of them.”

“Of course not,” he smirks, finishing the rest of his Sangria, “they were just temporary replacements for Doyoung.”

She sighs exasperatedly. “That’s so not true-”

“A-ny-way,” Johnny’s attempt to silence her dissent by speaking even louder toes the line between irritating and downright hilarious, “against that backdrop, forgive me for being surprised that Doyoung caught your eye. You guys are so similar, I want it to happen, for my friends.” He leans back in a ‘mic drop’ moment, crossing his arms in front of him in gratuitous smug. “Plus, I can vouch that he’s an amazing lover…”

“What?!”

“I once heard him having with Inhee.” His face morphs into mock disgust. “I mean, I didn’t enjoy it, but… Her moans were, what’s the word for it – banshee-esque.”

“Please don’t go on.”

“Look, all I’m saying is-” he sits up as if he was addressing a serious issue, “you guys are meant to be, okay? Believe me, I know these things. You’re soulmates.”

“Who are soulmates?”

A familiar tenor voice rings from behind them, making both Johnny and Haewon whip their heads towards the open door, a heart-wrenching sight greeting them. At the threshold stands a casually-dressed Doyoung, blue hoodie and black track pants embracing his seemingly thinner frame. His usually gelled dark hair falls softly across his forehead in a rare sight, but it’s the small smile worn on his face that arrests her heart, especially the way it doesn’t reach his eyes like it used to.

“Why do you look like that?” He addresses Johnny, “you gave me your spare keys, remember?”

Without a word, Johnny launches himself into Doyoung’s arms, a gesture that looks far more endearing than comedic despite the quiet ‘oof’ that emits from Doyoung’s lips.

“Hey,” he chuckles against Johnny’s shoulder, even though his eyes are on Haewon, “I’m fine, don’t worry. Who are soulmates?”

Haewon smiles softly, letting out a shaky breath as she finds herself incapable of speech.

“I mean, I don’t know who specifically, but you know who and who aren’t soulmates?” Johnny releases Doyoung, laughing uneasily. “Me and Miss licious.”

Haewon’s jaw drops, reluctantly shifting her gaze to meet Johnny’s taunting gaze, Doyoung’s following hers.

“What?” Johnny giggles like he meant to surprise her, “I heard you calling her that to Mama Kang the other night. And yes, we broke up a couple of days ago.”

“You didn’t tell me!”

Doyoung frowns. “You were dating someone?”

“See?” Johnny glares comically, “this is why I didn’t want to tell either of you. You had too much on your plate. Besides, it’s fine, it wasn’t that serious…”

Not that serious my foot, Haewon thinks. You were about to get down on one knee.

Doyoung’s frown deepens as he turns towards Johnny, “okay, well tell me about it another time, I… uhm.”

“I actually came to speak to Haewon.”

She grabs a few bottles of soju Johnny recently purchased from the refrigerator, attempting futilely not to eavesdrop on their conversation in the sitting room. Unwittingly and somewhat annoyingly, her mind toys with the idea that she must mean something to Doyoung, since he’s here and seems to be reaching out to her. But she tries to shut that down, rummaging through the snack cabinet and stashing two bags of potato chips into her haversack before zipping her bag up and running out.

“Okay, I’m ready for ya-” she stops when she catches two surprised faces staring back at her.

She had changed out of her work wear into casual clothes after Doyoung had told her he wanted to talk to her privately and gestured with his car keys. Now, seeing their faces, she wonders if she should have just stayed in her baby blue button-down and pencil skirt.

Doyoung’s face breaks into a charming smile, “okay, let’s go”.

Haewon smiles back widely, following him out of the door after waving goodbye to a wide-eyed Johnny.

“This is arguably crossing the line of professionalism, but… I brought soju?” Haewon grins up at him, breaking the companionable silence they had shared all the way from the apartment to his car.

Doyoung laughs, but his smile still doesn’t reach his eyes. “No, it’s great, actually…” he pauses, revving up the engine and waiting for her to buckle her seatbelt before reversing out of the parking lot, “I think I’ll need it.”

She plays with the baseball keychain on her backpack zipper, unsure of what to say as she watches Doyoung’s fingers grip the steering wheel. She wants to ask him how he’s been, ask him how he feels, tell him how much she’s missed him the entire week, that she didn’t know how she was going to cope in America because not seeing him was somehow far more difficult than convincing herself to let go of him and move on.

She wants to tell him how many times she had passed by his office this week and wanted to walk in, hoping he’d somehow be there. The words press against the inside of her cheeks and threaten to spill from her lips, but she swallows them, knowing that there is a time and place for everything, and her time and place is entirely Doyoung’s tonight.

Instead, she presses her temple against the cool of the windowpane, smoothing the night out of her hair and waits for Doyoung to speak again.

“You know, Johnny has gone through more partners than the both of us combined,” he jokes now.

Haewon almost remarks back that Doyoung has really only been with one person since she’s known him but stops herself, knowing it’s too soon for something like that. She tries, instead, to find safe ground in this conversation.

“Well, he’s a romantic.” She says, sighing in relief internally when Doyoung laughs. “He won’t stop looking for his soulmate.”

“Remember Watanabe Aoi? I was honestly surprised when they broke up.” He quips, referring to the small bubbly Japanese model Johnny had dated for slightly more than a year, who had tearfully dumped him because of the long distance. Johnny had sworn himself off dating and relationships forever while binging himself on a tub of Ben & Jerry’s that night, but had then excitedly gone on a date with a girl from Haewon’s gym two weeks later.

Haewon smiles, remembering how Johnny had insisted, just a few days ago, that the topic of Aoi-san is still sensitive material.

“I was honestly glad. She didn’t love Johnny enough. He was willing to move to another country for her, but you and I both know she wouldn’t have done the same for him.” She sticks her bottom lip out, reminiscing how defensive Johnny had reacted when she had pointed that out thoughtlessly. “There were times he would wait for her to call the entire night, sleeping beside his phone, and then receive a nonchalant text from her the next morning about how she’d fallen asleep once she got home from work.”

Doyoung stifles a laugh at her unyielding tone. “Yeah but… I mean, relationships are hard.”

“Sure,” she nods, “but you should know your worth.”

This draws a curious glance from Doyoung, before he returns his eyes on the road quickly. “What do you mean?”

“Well, I mean… hmm. It’s like… Remember in college, finals season, everyone’s rushing to the library to study…” Doyoung makes an appreciative hum, “Well, imagine that, and your friend’s like, ‘oh I’m headed there too, save a seat for me’ so you do, but then it’s been close to an hour - and then two - and they haven’t turned up. Your bag is on the seat, and you’re thinking… If I continue to hog the seat, someone else can’t have it, but if I give it up, what if that friend does show up?”

“… You know what I think? I think… I think everyone should have a threshold, and when the waiting time exceeds that threshold, if someone else comes along… We shouldn’t be afraid to give up that seat.”

She twirls the tiny baseball with her fingers, pausing for a moment to let the words settle between them.

“Free ourselves up for something better, you know?” She says, finally looking up at him.

Doyoung hums thoughtfully, and they fall into a necessary silence.

They’re in dangerous waters, Haewon realizes. And as she watches Doyoung’s fingers dance across the dashboard to lower the AC, she briefly flirts with the idea that the stakes of action and inaction are, unlike what she had thought, barely equal. While Johnny had contended that telling Doyoung the truth would have put an end to their deceptive relationship, she remains convinced that if she had told Doyoung about Inhee’s affair earlier, chances are he wouldn’t have believed her, opting instead to trust someone he loved and had known for a longer time. Similarly, if she had not confessed that day, perhaps she wouldn’t be finding herself in the passenger seat of her ex-superior’s car, the atmosphere beholding a tension no one can cut through. But if she had not confessed that day, she also wouldn’t ever have had the courage to do so, and wouldn’t have known that in some manner, deep down, she meant something to him, no matter how little.

At the same time, however, Haewon gleans that she isn’t that much closer to an answer as she thought she would be. Instead, in the aftermath of her confession and the end of his relationship, she finds herself, pertaining to the situation of it all, simultaneously within and without.

It’s almost a cliché when Haewon finds herself on the grass facing the Han river, inhaling the salty river air deeply before unpacking the food and drinks from her backpack.

Doyoung lets out a tinkling laugh, watching her balance the soju bottles on her haversack lying on the grass.

“You’re so prepared, I even thought you brought a picnic mat.”

She sticks her tongue out, patting the clean but lightly damp grass next to her invitingly. So he smiles and crouches down to take a seat as she uncaps a bottle of peach soju for herself. Then, as if suddenly remembering, she fishes a pack of cigarettes from the bottom of the backpack and hands it over to him wordlessly.

“I haven’t had a cigarette in years,” Doyoung chuckles, but takes it anyway.

“I know,” she grins, “I stole this from Johnny. I thought it might help, you know, whatever you need to say. Let it out, boss.”

Before them, the streetlights on the Hangang Bridge shine relentlessly. The Han River is quiet for a Friday night, save for the muted honking in the distance and a chorus of cicadas rubbing their thighs together in the background. Haewon waits for Doyoung to start, feeling the tail of spring rubbing soft against her bare legs and watching as the heavy light from the bridge drape itself across the surface of the Han river like some form of condolence.

Doyoung lights a cigarette, the smoke curling out of him like a ghost.

“That’s what you wanted to tell me, wasn’t it?”

Haewon’s eyes widen.

“The whole day…” He says, turning to her with a gentle smile, “you were trying to get ahold of me to tell me that she was seeing someone else, weren’t you?”

She purses her lips and nod, taking a gulp of the soju in her hands. This is not the conversation she had expected.

“When you told me how you felt…” he exhales, “the next few days I kept thinking, ‘that’s not what she was gonna say’. I knew you wanted to tell me something the whole day, but that wasn’t it. You didn’t mean to say it, you weren’t prepared…”

“Thank you for overanalyzing my inability to form coherent sentences.”

Doyoung laughs breathily, shaking his head. “That’s not what I meant.”

“The day after the… shower incident, Inhee kept asking me ‘did Haewon tell you?’, as if it mattered. Besides, it wasn’t difficult to guess that you knew as well, your reactions towards her when I mentioned her name in the last few weeks have been very telling.”

Haewon relaxes, then her eyes widen again when his words sink in.

“Yes, Haewon, I knew about the affair.”

Haewon’s jaw goes slack, but she’s unable to speak, watching as he smiles wistfully.

“About four months ago?” He says, as if knowing what she’s about to ask. “There was this morning, just before we left the house, her phone was on the table, and I accidentally saw a text from him.”

He attempts to uncap a bottle of grapefruit soju with the cigarette still in his hands, until he gives up and hands it over to Haewon.

“There comes a point when you can’t deny that something is happening, even if you try to lie to yourself.”

Haewon bites her lip, handing the uncapped bottle back to him. So strange that that had been exactly what Haewon had thought just a few weeks ago. So strange how different the circumstances have since become.

“You know, Inhee said I didn’t love her, so I didn’t deserve to get upset about this.”

Haewon’s heart thumps against her chest. “She… She said that?”

“No, it’s true.” He smiles, downing a fair amount of soju, “I haven’t been in love with her for a while.”

Her eyes soften, watching his dark hair blow gently in the air and the light on the water reflecting on his cheeks, illuminating his face.

“Well, I can’t say, if I ever really loved her. For the better part of the relationship, she was always the one taking charge. Do you know she asked me out in high school? Everyone was incredulous – and I have to admit, I was as well. I wasn’t some captain of some sports team, I was a random short distance runner who preferred spending most of my time with the school magazine team than the track team.

“But when I hesitated, everyone said, ‘what are you doing? She just asked you out!’… to the extent that I felt I needed to choose her because she chose me. Hmm. It’s strange, isn’t it?” He muses, “that even at that age, some sort of… ranking system, based on the ‘leagues’ we were accorded - given our physical attractiveness and personal interests  - would emerge. And then future decisions - no matter how personal - could only be helmed by those ranked higher in the social hierarchy.”

He balances the soju bottle between his knees, taking a puff of his cigarette.

“I’m not going to chalk it all up to peer pressure – I can’t say I wasn’t drawn to her because of exactly those reasons. And as our relationship progressed, I saw that we were not always compatible. But I thought I was just picky, that I had doomed the relationship from the start with my skepticism and so could only see the parts of us that didn’t match. And when difficult things happened in the family – she was always there. When I needed someone – she was always there.

“I got too comfortable in the relationship. She was so good to me, and my whole family loved her, everyone loved her. She didn’t always support every decision I made, but she wouldn’t say a second thing once I made up my mind. We were so different, and she didn’t always see things the way I did, but I thought I didn’t need her to, you know? That these were things I could share with other people instead. ‘Your partner doesn’t have to be your best friend’, people told me that. So when my mother asked me when we were getting married, I… Well, I thought it was the right thing to do. So I proposed. And everyone was so happy. I mean, I guess I felt happy, that everyone was happy. I thought maybe the happiness was just belated for me.

“God, I made so many excuses to feel better, about not feeling better.” He frowns, but a laugh escapes his lips, and the laugh subsides into a hollow sort of quiet. “’You’ll be happy when you see her in her dress.’ I told myself. ‘When you see her walking down the aisle. When you’re actually married. When your first child is born.’ I was scared to admit that I wasn’t happy – and then, when I couldn’t deny it any longer, scared to do the thing I knew I had to, to be happy again.  

“I’m always saying things like, ‘ other people’s expectations, who cares what people think’, but I can’t deny that I caved. It was comfortable, it was easy – so even when I found out that she could be cheating on me, I didn’t want to ruin the future I had fallen so easily in step with. I didn’t know why I was still running, but I was so afraid to stop.”

He downs almost half the bottle of soju, before exhaling slowly.

“Do you think I’m a coward?” He turns towards her.

She thinks about his question for a moment, and shakes her head. “No, I think what you just said is what makes us human. And the courage to acknowledge that you’re human, is what makes you a braver one.”

And finally, Doyoung’s face breaks into a smile.

“You always know how to make me feel better.”

Haewon looks at him for a long time, his eyes sparkling but not watery, his tender sorrow hidden behind a gentle smile. This is the Doyoung she’s fallen in love with, strong and courageous, bent but not broken. The Doyoung who would know how to fix himself even if he is broken. The same Doyoung who, whether she recognizes it or not, looks at her as if she holds the ways of the universe.

“I want to thank you.” He adds.

She lets out a soft smile, brushing strands of hair away from her face.

“Thank you, for holding back, for hesitating. I know you were worried about hurting me, but I’m really okay. And actually, on some level, I’m glad you didn’t tell me. If you’d told me, I might have ignored all of it, again.

“Standing in front of the bathroom knowing I was minutes away from confronting her… That was the wake-up call I needed. I knew I could run away again, leave the apartment, pretend all of it wasn’t happening like I’d done before so many times when a hint of the affair presented itself. But this time… I couldn’t. I had to see the truth, had to see it face-to-face to wake up and realize that this wasn’t right for both of us. It wasn’t fair to her, and it wasn’t fair to me as well.

“So thank you, for not saying a thing.”

She can feel the warmth in her eyes, thinking about what he had to go through and feeling, once again, that Johnny had been right. Despite what Doyoung had said, she feels guilty knowing that he could have potentially avoided such a cruel confrontation. But even with the feeling of something lodged in , Haewon knows it’s not her moment to show these secondhand emotions, especially when the haphazard debris of his relationship is still warm, still smoking. So she swallows these thoughts and any arising tears back with another big gulp of soju altogether.

“You deserve the best, Doyoung.” She says after a moment.

He turns to look at her gently, studying her features, “what’s wrong?”

She sighs, calming herself down.

“I just… I didn’t know if I was in the correct position-”

“Well you didn’t have to say anything, but you are. You’ve…” He purses his lips, “you’ve always been. In the right position, in the right place. You’re…”

He opens his mouth, and then shuts it, exhaling. Then his lips part again.

“You’re very important to me.”

Haewon looks at him, feeling the breath knocked out of her lungs.

And there it is, another confusing statement of Doyoung’s bordering this time, on frustrating. While she cannot bring herself to call him out on it, she finds herself no longer able to accept these somewhat lackadaisical words from him anymore, not when he is so entirely aware of the feelings she still has for him. So she drops him a teary chuckle, finishes the rest of her soju and mutters a “well, I feel the same way” instead of what she wants to say, these kinder words delivered like an afterthought to find themselves, somewhere, in the spaces between them.

She can feel Johnny’s curious peering as she finishes the rest of her breakfast, her mind still running amok with Doyoung’s words last night. She wonders why he always does this, drops these tiny bombs that mess with her for the next couple of days before she finally wills them away and classifies them as unintentional. She hears Johnny call her name faintly, but can only bring herself to tear her thoughts away from Doyoung at his third call.

“I saw you get in late last night,” Johnny says, “is everything ok?”

“Yeah, he just wanted to talk.” She stands and takes both empty bowls, as well as the empty stew pot, into the kitchen, running the tap to soak the dishes in the sink.

“He knows,” she says, hearing Johnny step into the kitchen behind her as she turns the tap off, “that, I knew.”

“Oh yeah, he told me.”

She nods, turning to face him, her hands still clasped on the countertop.

“So are you… like, getting together?”

Haewon shakes her head. “No, no of course not. I don’t think… I don’t think it’ll ever happen. About what you said yesterday… I think you’re wrong this time.” His expression morphs into bewilderment. “I put everything on the line, John, but he doesn’t want me.”

Johnny studies her carefully. “You confessed to him?”

She bites her lip and nods.

“The day you told me to tell him… I couldn’t… I ended up…” she sighs in exasperation.

“You didn’t tell me about this.”

“Sorry, I was… I didn’t want you to think less of me.”

“Never.” He says, his eyes soft and unreadable. “Come here,” he gestures with his open arms, wrapping them securely around her when she settles into his embrace. Being around Johnny has always been comforting, Haewon thinks to herself, smiling when she feels a kiss on her temple. She hugs him tightly, inhaling the scent of his laundry detergent instead of his usual cologne.

“I love you, you know that, right?” He says, releasing her from his embrace but his arms still wound around her waist.

She smiles, nodding.

“I know.”

Johnny’s gaze is soft and slightly dejected, and a part of Haewon wants to ask him what’s wrong, not understanding why there is a quiet, slightly fearful resolution in his eyes -

- until he pulls her even more closely towards him and slants his lips over hers.

w/n: in case anyone was wondering, Watanabe Aoi was my Aikido sensei when I was young lmao. she was hot. i honestly just wanted a random name and was tired of searching for Korean names.

double update 'cause (i) this has been uploaded before; and (ii) i won't have time to upload another chapter next week!

a liddol tmi/fun fact thing: i sort of modeled inhee's vibe/look after rv joy - BUT NOT THE CHARACTER. i absolutely love joy and think she's a sweetheart (+ mayhaps would want a daughter like her hehe) so yes, wanted to make that clear. but i thought of joy 'cause i remember reading that dy and joy have been close since they were trainees (not certain about the /accuracy/ of this statement though, so don't @ me) but it literally made me uwu 'cause i really love joy too. i also associate joy with expensive, classy things 'cause... idk she looks expensive and classy hehe

what did you think??? please leave a comment below if you enjoyed it!