A/N: Did I write this, fall asleep when I finished, then dreamt that I uploaded it, then proceeded to work on the next chapter the next day instead of checking? Maybe

--

Dahyun is a little confused. Which, really isn’t that far from the regular. She’s pretty A-Okay for now. She could do without the smell of burning rubber and the random bursts of angry screams though. That’s kind of annoying. Also, Dahyun is fairly sure that Nayeon hasn’t blinked in about 10 minutes according the watch that she doesn’t wear. She’s sure its most likely an existential crisis. Those, she understands.

“So… Does Mina do this every time she’s mad? Or did this recently start? Because I really don’t remember her wanting to drive angry donuts and start screaming randomly when we first met,” Dahyun has to speak up a little. Mina just let out a rather guttural scream and Nayeon is starting to freak her out a lot. She’s staring at her hands. And not blinking. Dahyun accepted this job like 8 hours ago and she’s starting to regret it. She should have remembered that while Mina and Nayeon are like a well-oiled machine in the way they work, that machine is like if a mechanic got real ed up on drugs, then proceeded to build said machine. They work, but to the outsider, it feels like it shouldn’t. She knows they won’t force her to take this job, they’re good people. Oh well, Dahyun always had fun with them anyways and she loves a good mess. Might as well just stick it through.

“What? Yeah, I guess sometimes. I mean, she usually deals by brooding and looking through a window on a rainy day but you know, really depends on what makes her mad,” Dahyun nods, that makes sense actually. Dahyun gets the vibe that Mina can be either very teen angst or just straight up murder adrenaline time. That’s a fun combo.

“If you guys don’t mind me asking, what made her this mad in the first place? I mean she seemed pretty happy on the phone when she was telling me about Tzuyu? At a certain point when we were talking I was sure she was ting rainbows.”

“Oh yeah well, Tzuyu is a little angel baby, it’s pretty understandable,” Nayeon hands the note to Dahyun, disgust making its way on to her face, “Here, this should explain what’s up with Mina.”

“She’s upset that you got a 4/5 on a ranking? Maybe you guys are better friends than I thought.”

“What? NO! Just read the rest of the damn note. By the way, I would like to add that I was more than satisfactory. In fact, I think I should have gotten 100/5. That’s how awesome I was. Momo should be the one ting rainbows. And another thing-,”

Maybe, Dahyun tuned her out. No one will ever know. Anyways, the note seemed pretty light, threat wise. If Mina had asked, Dahyun would be happy to take this Momo out of the situation. Considering that the note does make it seem like Tzuyu and Momo know each other, perhaps there’s a reason why Mina doesn’t want to hurt Tzuyu in any way. Hopefully, Dahyun can make friends with this “Tzuyu”. Makes the job easier and even Nayeon seems to want to put her in a box to keep her safe.

“Look I have a question. Do you think that 3 fingers are too much?”

“What? No, of course not. Most people have 10.”

“I- I guess?” Nayeon looks to the ground, what the .

The car that was previously sending smoke signals to the sky has finally come to a stop. Out steps Mina, looking like a typical, badass racer. Boots, leather jacket, and aviators all to match. Except the massive ing pout and the waddle she has as she makes her way towards Nayeon and Dahyun.

“Guuuuuuuuyyyyyyssssss. I want to go see Tzuyu but I caaaaaaaannnn’ttttt. Because Momo won’t let meeeeeeeeee.” They’re pretty sure that Mina is this close to stomping her feet.

“We can go see Sana, Jeongyeon, and Jihyo instead? I haven’t seen them in a while and maybe you can ask Jeong to make you comfort food?” asks Dahyun. She hasn’t had the time to catch up with everyone. It would be nice to see them.

“Absolutely not. I refuse to go see them after what happened last night. Jeongyeon keeps sending me pictures of my face from last night photo shopped into different situations.”

“Wait, what exactly happened last night?”

“Oh, well, you see,” Mina is smiling again. Except it’s her evil smile. Nayeon wants to kill her.

Nayeon is driving to the Three Blind Mice bar. (There’s a reason why Nayeon had started to call them rats so “affectionately”.) Mina and Dahyun are struggling to breathe in the backseat as they fall over each other. Also, Mina added Dahyun to the group chat. Now she’s personally adding on to Jeongyeon’s collection and from the incoming buzzes on all of their phones, she can only suspect that those rats love the new addition. Nayeon is going to throw herself off a cliff.

--

The Three Blind Mice, the staple of underground South Korea. Gangs, racers, smugglers, and dealers understand the silent rule. No mischief or trouble allowed at the bar, so long as Jihyo, Jeongyeon, and Sana are in charge. Legend has it, someone had tried to rob the bar while Jeongyeon was at the register and left with only two fingers and a foot. Besides, it was a nice place to pretend that your job isn’t doing something illegal. That you can pretend that you’re just stopping by for a quick break, before heading back to your regular job and regular family. There was no judgement from the owners, just a semblance of peace in the chaos of everyone’s life. Maybe that’s why Momo, Chaeng, and Tzu liked it so much.

Sitting in the back corner of the bar, was said girls, waiting for their lunch. (Their spot has a plaque with their names on it, for everyone to see. Someone tried to sit their once, when it was busy and none of the girls were there. Jihyo pulled out her gun.) Sana comes out, tray of seafood in hand. As well as three different lobster hats. Anything for her babies.

“Here you go guys, this is all we had left from the back if that’s okay. Tonight, is actually steak so make sure to come back tonight.” Sana places the hats on Momo and Chaeyoung’s head. Then proceeds to hug Tzuyu until the girl is struggling to breathe. She has a favorite. Sue her.

Well come to think of it, her wives had favorites too. Chaeng was Jeongyeon’s favorite. They will sit there for hours and trade dad jokes and puns all day if they could. Thankfully, Jihyo pretended that the bar was “too much” for her and Sana to handle alone. (Jihyo nearly cries every time she hears another goddamn joke coming from their mouths.)

Jihyo’s favorite was Momo, hands down. They’re both gym rats and Sana was fairly sure that they also make up dance routines just for the fun of it. Sana tried hacking into Jihyo’s phone to find them, but Jihyo has exactly 29 firewalls up. It’ll take her a little longer.

Finally, Sana’s favorite was Tzuyu. Sana had been lost in a storm one day, trying to find the homes in which her, then girlfriends, had resided. The girl brought Sana to her home for the night, where she met the Momo and Chaeyoung. She also allowed her to use her phone to call her girls to let them know, and proceeded to tuck her into bed then slept on the floor next to her. In return, Sana gifted her with her friendship and a small puppy named Gucci.

“Are you sure you don’t want to sit and eat with us? Jihyo and Jeongyeon said they were going to eat with us too. I don’t want you to feel left out.” Tzuyu gave her the puppy eyes. If Sana said no, not only would it feel like kicking a puppy, but she’s pretty sure that Momo will murder her. Another reason why Momo wasn’t Sana’s favorite. They love each other, but would Momo body slam Sana into the ground for a bag of chips? Absolutely. Would Sana keep bringing up that time Momo thought 2 + 3 = 7 at inappropriate moments? Yes. Yes, she would.

“Sit your down Sana, it’s family lunch time,” says Jihyo, walking in with yet another tray of food. Jeongyeon is behind her with drinks, water for everyone and juice for Momo. Because Jeongyeon has yet to figure out a way to get Momo to drink water. It’s surprising that none of the girls are 400 pounds yet.

A buzz in Jihyo’s pocket indicates another text. When she checks, she starts coughing up the water she just tried to drink. Yet another picture of Nayeon. This time, her face is photo shopped to look like she’s bald. Jihyo saved it as her new contact photo, she’ll show it to the girls later, right now, it’s family time.

--

Momo is helping clean the mess from the table. Tzuyu and Chaeng were excused for gun “training” as Chaeyoung said. Momo knows Tzuyu doesn’t need it. They’re just ing lazy. A slam of the front door sparks her interest, however.

“Where the is Jihyo?! I know you’re here you piece of . I just wanna talk about the photo of me as Pikachu. Come out here, nobody wants to fight.” Yup, that’s Nayeon. The girl she gave a ranking to. That night was actually 5/5 but the girl kept bragging afterwards and Momo wanted to be an .

“Maybe you were 5 seconds late,” says a smirking small girl, who seems to be holding Mina up. Mina looks like she’s about to die from laughing too much. Only her laugh was canceled out by Sana’s loud laugh.

“Oh, sorry Nayeon, I didn’t hear you come in. I was too busy framing this.” Jihyo comes out from the back, holding onto a picture of Nayeon’s face after she lost. The words Five Seconds labeled on the bottom.

“Wait Jihyo add this to it,” Dahyun hands her the note that she kept hold of. Nayeon regrets all her life choices.

“4/5?!?! YOU GOT A RATING?!” Sana is about to keel over and die. Until she reads who it’s from, “Wait. Momo?” The girl in question is trying to quietly make it to the other side of the room, where the door to the shooting gallery is.

“Hey guys, what’s up? Dahyun, it’s good to see you!” Jeongyeon comes out from the back.

“Hey Jeongyeon, I have a question,”

“Sure, what’s up?”

“Did you think I was good that night we spent together?”

“Oh, so that’s what we’re doing? We’re fighting? That’s how you want to spend your day?”

“What? NO! Just answer the damn question!”

“Look I don’t feel in the mood to fight with you today.”

“Answer the ing question, I thought we were friends.”

“FRIENDS? I TOLD YOU I DON’T WANT TO FIGHT”

As Nayeon gears up her response, Dahyun goes to explore the building, she’ll come back when they are ready to actually fight with fists. It takes about 25 minutes of pure arguing until they start throwing hands. Just as she closes a door and entered a room labeled shooting gallery, Sana’s voice rings out.

“Momo? Did you write this?”

All heads turn to the person in full sneak stance halfway across the room, arms in claw form, on her tippy toes, and legs stretched out.

“Ummmmmm”

“4/5?!?!?! I’LL KILL YOU”

--

“Look Tzuyu, I know that you’re good at archery, but guns are a completely different area. I, for one, am the ultimate master. Today, I will train you to be the best marksm-,”

Chaeyoung is interrupted by Tzuyu emptying an entire clip into the dummy’s head. Left handed, with her eyes focused on Chaeng, a bored expression on her face.

“While that was impressive. The guns I meant were THESE,” Chaeyoung holds up a box filled with Nerf guns and bullets. Quickly giving Tzuyu a gun and bullets, she yells out the only rule, “FIRST ONE TO GET HIT 5 TIMES LOSES.” With that, she aims for Tzuyu right in the head and pulls the trigger.

“NOOOOOOOOOO” Instead of getting hit with the bullet, Tzuyu is now falling to the ground, a small human with skin as white as snow has tackled her. And now her head is buried into this person’s chest and she has never had a more confusing day in her life.

“That was CHEATING. You didn’t even give her time to load the gun CHEATER. Tzuyu are you alright?”

“Who the are you?! What the is going on? How do you even know us? Why are you wearing your pants with one pant leg rolled up?” Chaeyoung is stressed. What even is her life anymore? She should have stuck with her plans as a child and become a rainbow princess unicorn astronaut artist. Now she’s here.

“Oh yeah. Hi! I’m Dahyun nice to meet you! I’m a friend of Jeongyeon, Jihyo, and Sana” Her smile is wide as she sticks out her hand to Chaeyoung, who doesn’t take it and just stares. Then to Tzuyu, who is still kinda frazzled, but takes it anyways.

“I’m Tzuyu and that’s Chaeyoung! Thanks for saving me, I could have died”

“Oh, no problemo amigo. I’m a big fan of innocents not getting hurt.”

“Literally what is going on. We don’t even kno-,” Chaeyoung is cut off by the sound of a stampede of feet.

“TZUYU ARE YOU ALRIGHT I HEARD SCREAMING AND CHAEYONG SOUNDS CONFUSED,” In comes Momo, who looks like she’s just been put through the wringer.

“TZUYU’S IN THERE? IS SHE HURT? IS SHE DYING?” Then Mina, who looks like she’s about to have an aneurysm. Then the rest of the Brady bunch, all piled on top of those two, with screams and shouts of protecting Tzuyu.

“Oh, yeah I’m fine guys! Chaeng just tried to shoot me in the head! But it’s all good, Dahyun was here to save me!” says Tzuyu, who is still in Dahyun’s protective hold on the floor. She really is like a big giant puppy.

“Chaeyoung SHOT you? What the Chaeng?” Momo’s head turns to the girl in question. As well as seven other heads. Chaeyoung throws her hands up in the air. Again, what even was her life?

--

Now there they were the 9 of them sitting in the closed bar. 6 of them, being the most prominent players in what many call “The Underground”. The biggest names to criminals everywhere. The younger 3, Dahyun, Chaeyoung, and Tzuyu weren’t as well known, but their association with the others did put their names closer to the top. Dahyun, because her job required stealth and secrets. (Being a hitman/private investigator is incredibly hard, considering the fact that it can be very lonely when you only want to do jobs for certain people. Oh well, they’re her best friends now.) Chaeyoung and Tzuyu on the other hand, Momo refuses to let them reveal their specialties to this world.

Nayeon and Mina were glaring at Momo. Momo was focused on her piece of steak. Sana was finding medicine to nurse an incoming headache. Jihyo and Jeongyeon were trying to take unflattering photos of Nayeon. Dahyun and Tzuyu were deep into conversation about whether Tzuyu should get Gucci a red or black bandana instead of sticking with his normal collar. Chaeyoung was trying to figure Dahyun out, because seriously, there has to be something up with her sudden appearance. Not because she’s pretty or that she’s jealous Tzuyu is getting along with her. Or that she’s pretty and has a nice smile. And she’s pretty. She just super suspicious. Also, Tzuyu invited her to move in to the garage. Chaeyoung and Momo REALLY need to talk to Tzuyu about being too trusting. However, Momo already agreed, so maybe she’s on her own for this one.

“I really can’t believe you left me that note. 4/5. RIDICULOUS.” Nayeon is now shoving the note in Momo’s face.

“Well get OVER IT,” Momo wacks it away with her knife, making it fall towards the chair next to her. In front of Tzuyu, who picks up the note and begins reading. (Chaeyoung is also reading over her shoulder. Her neck kind of hurts from the strain, due to her friend’s height, but she lives for any mess and gossip.)

“Wait, Momo? You’re banning me from seeing Mina?” In comes Tzuyu and her pout. , Momo’s in trouble.

“See, look what you’ve done now. You got the baby upset, you have me upset, AND you have Mina upset. I should kick your ”

“Look Tzuyu,” Momo starts, ignoring Nayeon all together, “I just think it’s for the best if we separate ourselves from them, they mean trouble.”

“Trouble my , you’re just taking out your anger of Nayeon lacking in bed on Tzuyu and me! That’s why you won’t let me see her and why you won’t join my crew” claims Mina, who also ignores Nayeon’s shout of disapproval.

“Is no one listening to me?”

“Saaaaannnnnaaaaaa, Momo is making me sad because she banned me from Mina,” pouts Tzuyu. Sana comes out from the kitchen at the call of her name.

“Momo fix it before I shove this knife through your ing hand and stop feeding you.”

“Momo, you’re my baby, but if I have to see Tzuyu pout, I’ll literally slash your tires before every race.” Jihyo looks at Momo, a glare on her face. Jeongyeon just stares ate her, running a finger across her neck. Momo understands that message clearly.

“GOD FINE. Tzuyu you can still hang Mina. BUT I will still not join Mina’s stupid ing crew. If Ms. ‘I can’t get over the fact I’m mediocre at ’ over here is part of her roster, I don’t want to be anywhere near it.”

“HEY!”

“My crew is GREAT for your information ”

“Yay! Mina, Chaeng, Dahyun! Let’s go buy stuff for Gucci!” Grabbing said girls’ hands, Tzuyu leads them to the pet store down the street. Not before hugging each one of the older girls goodbye first. Momo whispers that she loves her. Sana and Jihyo nearly suffocate her. Jeong messes with her hair. Nayeon nearly cries from the hug.

“I hope you know that I’ve known you for a day Tzuyu, but if anything happens to you, I would kill everyone in this room and then myself.”

--

Outtakes:

• The Fight:

“I can’t believe you gave me a FOUR OUT OF FIVE! WHO EVEN GIVES RATINGS?”

“Look, I’m sorry you can’t cope with your grade but at least it’s a B? That’s still pretty good!”

“PRETTY GOOD? I’M ING GREAT! RIGHT JEONG?”

“I TOLD YOU I DID NOT WANT TO FIGHT WITH YOU TODAY”

“HOW ARE THOSE EVEN FIGHTING WORDS? ANYWAYS WHO HAS EVER GOTTEN A PERFECT SCORE? BECAUSE NO ONE IS BETTER THAN ME”

“Sana actually. And Jihyo. Also, Jeongyeon.”

“Wait, what? All of them? What the ?”

“No, I have to agree with her Nay, Sana was actually pretty great”

“MINA?!?!”

“Can we all just calm down and stop talking about who has done the shame-shame with who?”

“YOU’RE NOT EVEN MAD THAT THEY’VE SLEPT WITH YOUR WIFE?”

“No, because they’re right, she’s pretty awesome. She also got a free pass because they were on her ‘Free Pass to Sleep With’ List. Along with Tzuyu, Dahyun and Chaeng”

“JIHYO?!?! SANA?!?! I’M NOT ON THE LIST?!?!”

• The Invitation

“Hey Dahyun, you’re new around here right? Do you have a place to stay or a job? You can come live with us! I need some extra help around the garage”

“Yeah, Dahyun, you did save her from that dirty, rotten, cheater, and traitor over there. And if you stay with us, I can be sure that someone I trust is helping watch over the garage and Tzuyu”

“Thanks for the offer Momo and Tzuyu! I think I’ll take it. I did need a new place to stay, my lease is nearly up and I’ve been looking for a new job!”

“Guys?!? We’ve known her for ten minutes? GUYS?? WHAT IS HAPPENING??”

--

A/N: I think we’ve ALL had a crush on Sana at one point because she’s great. The adventures of Unnie line and maknae line, coming up next. Spoiler, Mina is my favorite character solely for her role in the next chapter. Also, I like making Nayeon the brunt of all the jokes because I like her memes the best. That’s it. That’s the reason. Sorry for the delay. I’ll try to think of an actual schedule for writing.

Until next time, JM