Eunhyuk POV

I stumbled into Strong Heart's studio, half prepared to be screamed at for taking so long at the hospital. We were due to air in about five minutes and I still had to change clothes as well as get my makeup fixed. I slumped into a chair, ignoring everyone in the changing room. I looked at myself in the mirror, finding a lifeless body that was just rummaging around pointlessly.

I had forbid myself to smoke ever in my entire life, and I hadn't had a drink until last year. Why was I being punished? I dropped my head making the make up noona scream at me.

"Eunhyuk," Heechul's familiar sarcastic voice called my name. I turned my head slowly to look at him. He had a large smile on his face and he bent down to whisper in my ear. "I missed you," he said softly so the make up noona couldn't hear. I stared at him, his words unaffecting me at all. Heechul frowned at me. "What's wrong?" He asked kneeling down in front of me.

"I-I...It's nothing," I stuttered and put on a small smile. "I missed you too," I whispered back hoping that Heechul would drop the subject. He smiled back and stood up.

"Hurry up ok?" He pushed me. I nodded and let the make up noona do her thing before running out onto the stage. I sat down in my usual seat, my thoughts returning to the hospital visit. I couldn't tell anyone yet. I hadn't even accepted it. How would I tell them? How should I go about telling my brothers that not everything was going to be ok in the future. It's what I worked so hard for... and still it didn't help.

I sighed and looked down while the cameraman counted down the time that we would begin airing. It wasn't going to be a live broadcast but it was still important to minimize the mistakes we made. I lifted my head and smiled at the camera just as the recording began. It was a lot of mostly just sitting and listening to the others speak about their life events. I wasn't in the mood to joke around today so I just stayed in the background listening silently. During a break I asked the manager why all of Super Junior was here since not all of us were being filmed. He shrugged his shoulders and walked away.

I sighed as I looked around at who was actually being filmed and noticed Se7en in the front row. Se7en was a very well known singer and dancer. A person I looked up to, but I couldn't find any feelings while looking at him today. I looked down at myself, dressed in a silly sailor's shirt and white shorts that cut off just above the knee. I felt weird wearing this kind of outfit that didn't mix with my personality but I couldn't change now since the cue was up for the beginning of recording again.

This time Se7en was asked to dance... a name dance where he danced to the music and then did a hand stand, moving his legs to show a number Se7en. I was impressed but I still couldn't feel or show any emotions. However, Kang Ho Dong and Lee Seung Gi turned their attentions to me, asking me to also do a number dance. I wanted to decline, I wish I could have declined but I was pushed onto the stage. The music played and I moved around until the numbers began to be yelled out. I simply lifted my leg to show a number Se7en. Everyone thought it was hilarious, not noticing my unamused reaction.

Kang Ho Dong bowed to me which I bowed back, showing respect to him. I was then asked to do number eight which was another simple leg move and making an 'o' with my arms above my head. Again the crowd laughed hysterically. I returned quickly to my seat, not making myself noticed again throughout the recording. After finishing I went back stage, coming face to face with Heechul.

"There's something wrong with you," Heechul frowned. I shook my head and smiled.

"Just tired," I insisted and tried to escape into the changing room before he could say anything.

"No...that isn't it," Heechul pointed out. He crossed his arms and stared at me. "How was your doctor's appointment?" His question surprised me. I looked him in the eyes. He was studying me. I could tell that much about him. I shrugged my shoulders.

"It went well. Nothing out of the ordinary," I lied but Heechul didn't seem to notice.

"Ok then... we'll talk later," He walked away to join the other members. I was still confused as to why all the members had come when they weren't on the show. I entered the changing room and quickly changed into some jeans and a t-shirt, wrapping a scarf around my neck and putting a mask over my mouth. Even though it wasn't cold out and I wasn't sick, I felt more comfortable this way.

I was just about to leave when the door opened and Donghae quickly snuck in. He closed and locked the door behind him.

"Donghae?" I questioned, pulling down my mask as I did so.

"What is going on with you? I know there's something wrong... I know you too well Lee Hyuk Jae," Donghae was angry...almost to the point of outrage. I raised an eyebrow at him.

"What do you mean?" I asked. He pointed towards the door.

"That...that dance... you could have done so much better... dancing is your life but you acted like you didn't care today...tell me what's wrong," Donghae demanded. I sighed, rolled my eyes and tried to push past him. He pulled me back to the middle of the room. "You aren't leaving until you tell me," Donghae insisted.

"I guess we will be here all night then," I took a seat in a chair. "Since there's nothing to tell..." I pointed out. Donghae slammed his fists down on a table.

"Lee Hyuk Jae! Who do you take me for?" Donghae screamed at me. I thought for a moment about Heechul... about the Super Junior breaking apart but I realized that none of that mattered anymore.

"I don't take you for anything Lee Donghae," I replied harshly. Donghae took a step away from me, looking me up and down.

"I don't know you anymore..." Lee Donghae whispered. Surprisingly his words stinged a little bit.

"Maybe you never did..." I pointed out. I pushed past him, unlocking the door and walked out of the changing room. I push my mask back over my mouth as I met up with the other members. The managers looked around and counted us.

"Where's Donghae?" One asked.

"Here," A dangerous looking Donghae appeared from the side. With that we were all ushered into seperate vans. I took the back seat and fell asleep since I didn't want to be bothered by Donghae nor Heechul who both happened to be sitting in the same van as me.

tsk tsk tsk eunhyukkie and hae got into a fight :[ sorry for being such a bad author!!

-LHY