“Please don’t leave… Nayeon”

Mina pulled back from the contact as she slumped down to the floor. She couldn’t describe the feeling that suddenly creeped up to her consciousness after hearing the subconscious blabber of the older girl. A prick to her heart was felt and it doesn’t fade away, it lingers. The twinge of pain remains but her resolve to stay were stronger. There’s no backing out of this unreciprocated love. And it was bold of her to assume that she could.  

She calmed herself down as she turned over to check on Momo. She pulled the blanket over her body and fixed the pillow against her head. Momo flicked at the contact but returned to slumber right after. Mina was sure she was about to combust at the sudden reaction as she felt the back of her neck burning when Momo turned her head towards her, sleeping soundly. She released a sigh of relief.

The night’s still long so she decided to spread the extra mattress on the floor, which Momo used to sleep last time. She wanted to be easily accessible whenever the singer needs someone so sleeping outside Momo’s room was not an option.

++

Momo woke up feeling a sharp throbbing pain on her head. Feeling the soft surface of her bed, she realized she’s inside her room. It was already morning, and she was dazzled by the sunlight that is seeping through her curtains. She couldn’t remember how she got there, or how she was able to get home after drowning herself from alcohol. All she could remember is the last meeting with Nayeon. And the feeling of disgust towards the person she used to share her life to. Nayeon was her rock, if only she could immediately get rid of the feelings she had for the girl, then it should be easier to move on.

Pulling her hair to soothe the unrelenting headache, she sat up from her bed and suddenly she heard a loud thud coming from her kitchen. She went outside her room to check and saw a figure of a girl with her back’s facing her.

“Mina?” she called, and the younger girl flinched before turning slowly.

“S-Sorry if I used your kitchen without your permission, I thought of cooking something…” she stopped when Momo glanced at the clutter around her.

“Since when have you been here?” the singer asked as she picked up the trash on the floor.

“Since last night, uh, Jeongyeon told me you called in sick for work, so I decided to check-”

“Leave” Momo cold heartedly said cutting her off from her explanation. She isn’t in the mood to have someone around. She’s too occupied with her own thoughts. But when she saw the tears threatening to fall in Mina’s eyes, she was snapped out of her clouded mind. Mina stood there frozen in shock trying to hold back her tears.

“H-hey” Momo began to panic as she felt she’s being too mean. She doesn’t want to see anyone cry, most especially if she’s the cause. She felt a pang of guilt at the defenseless girl in front of her. “I’m… sorry, I didn’t mean to-”

Wiping her tears, Mina suddenly spoke amidst her sobbing “Well, I’m sorry for worrying about you” she abruptly said as she dashed towards the door walking away. Mina couldn’t control her outburst of emotions as well, running away isn’t the best solution but she has to keep her feelings in check before talking again to Momo. She knew she’s being too sensitive now, but she really felt unwanted that time. And it hurts so bad.

Momo didn’t move a muscle, she was dumbfounded with how her words turned into lashing out at someone. She didn’t intend to make it sound bad, but she must admit that it really isn’t the right words to say to someone who deliberately went to her apartment just to check on her wellbeing. She was conscience-stricken over her outburst.

++

Momo was able to appear in the club that day. Jeongyeon, who was worried as well, pulled the younger girl behind the stage to have a talk with her.

“Momo, are you feeling better now? You don’t have to perform if you’re not well” the older girl assured her patting her shoulders. Momo shook her head, Jeongyeon has always been understanding of her situation ever since she joined the band, she isn’t used to having new people around her that time, since Nayeon left, she’s always been the odd one out.

“I was drunk” Momo suddenly blurted out. Jeongyeon’s face dropped at the statement as she felt sorrow in Momo’s words. She knew Momo’s having a hard time, but they aren’t sure of the reason why. Jeongyeon sat at one of the chairs behind them and taps the one beside her gesturing for Momo to sit with her. Momo complied as she slumped herself against the chair. “What happened? You know, you can always tell me everything, we’re bandmates and I want to be your friend too, you can depend on us”

Momo jerked her head towards Jeongyeon who was looking at her intently. She saw warmth. Like telling her to trust her. It was hard for Momo to open up but this time, she puts her faith on Jeongyeon.

“A-are you sure?” the singer asked a bit hesitant. Jeongyeon just nods in response as she gave her a positive smile. “Tell me, I’m listening”

Momo told Jeongyeon everything, about Nayeon, and how she ended up joining the band. Jeongyeon felt empathetic for Momo, the singer’s been through a lot of heartaches caused by the same person.

“Now I understand why your songs are like that” the older claimed. “You did the right thing, Momo.” she added, referring to not accepting Nayeon’s offer. Jeongyeon hugged Momo assuring her that it will all be alright and that she’s not alone. “Thank you” she whispered, feeling the situation becomes a bit bearable after opening up to someone.

In a moment, they went together on the stage, preparing for their first song.

++

Facing the mirror, Mina is fixing herself, applying a light make up on, while wearing a black sheath dress. It was almost seven in the evening and her chauffer is waiting for her downstairs, ready to pick her up. She stood up, after putting on her layered diamond earrings.

“Ms. Myoui, your father and Jinyoung is already waiting for you in the restaurant” the chauffer reported, and Mina just hummed and went inside the car. She just doesn’t care as her mind was wandering everywhere. She couldn’t help it, she couldn’t get Momo off her mind. Even if she wanted to meet her, she felt that Momo doesn’t want her around. With a dejected sigh, she let herself drown at the memory.

Arriving at the extravagant restaurant, she was assisted by one of the servers towards the reserved table and her father and Jinyoung were already sitting there talking about business. She heaved a sigh as she approached the two.

“You’re late again” her father exclaimed feeling a bit disappointed with her lack of discipline. Jinyoung chuckled. “Mr. Myoui, you’re too strict with Mina” he commented, and Mina just rolled her eyes with the remark. Jinyoung is a young COO, her father trusted him so much that he promoted him to the position in just a span of one year and now he’s like her father’s advisor on anything regarding business. He’s smart, charming-who can easily attract investors, and ambitious. Mina couldn’t count him as a friend yet, but he’s been talking to her casually whenever her father invites him during dinner.

“Mina, how’s university? Your pro-ballet recital is coming up, I’ll come watch if I’m free” Jinyoung said being friendly again towards her.

“Good, nothing’s new” she said shortly, she really isn’t fond of talking to him, but her father will scold him if she reacted coldly.

They ate silently and after that, her father excused himself to go ahead as he has things left to do in the office.

“Jinyoung, please drive Mina home later” Mr. Myoui asked. “Don’t worry, Mr. Myoui”

Mina didn’t talk, after her father left, she’s just busy with her phone messaging Sana, but the brunette seemed busy.

“Your grades were dropping, what’s the problem?” Jinyoung suddenly spoke and Mina didn’t flinch at the question. “I have my moments” she retorted which didn’t convince Jinyoung at all. “Are you seeing someone?” he asked, Mina felt the back of her neck burning. It isn’t like she’s really seeing someone, but the question made her think of a particular person.

“No” she answered defensively. Jinyoung dropped the topic, noticing how uncomfortable the younger girl is. It was just his suspicion since Mina isn’t the kind of person to be easily distracted, and she always made sure that she’s at the top of her game. Feeling defeated, he sighed, “Okay, if you say so”

++

After the performance, the group gathered at one of the tables with Sana. Momo scanned the place and noticed that Mina isn’t with Sana. She suddenly felt guilty. She wanted to at least apologize to the girl and to at least thank her. Sana noticed that the singer wanted to ask about Mina, so she initiated the topic.

“She’s busy, family affairs” Sana said looking at Momo. “I can tell that you wanted to ask about her”

Momo was a bit surprised at how Sana could read her. Well, Sana is just that kind of person. The singer just responded with a little nod and there was a momentary silence. Jeongyeon suddenly lifted the mood with a suggestion. “Hey, Sana, why don’t we go on a vacation with one of your resorts” she thought it would be better for their band to get together once in a while and to help Momo cope up with her situation.

“Oh, that’s nice” Chaeyoung added feeling excited at the sudden suggestion.

“Okay, no problem! Let’s all go together” Sana agreed and took her phone to make a reservation. “Let me inform them first for available dates”

Momo hasn’t joined in any vacation with friends ever since she went to Seoul, she isn’t sure if she would go but Jeongyeon nudged her elbow with eyes showing an expectant look, “You will join us, right?” and she couldn’t say no with how excited the two band members are. Clearing , she uttered a silent “okay” that made Jeongyeon more excited. She just wanted Momo to have a break from the stress and heart aches she’s been going through. She’s thinking that this vacation will help her heal and divert her attention from Nayeon.

“Everything’s good. I already booked the resort this weekend” Sana said, and the two band members celebrated in joy. “Thanks Sana!” Jeongyeon said giving a quick peck on the girl’s cheek. “Hey, people are watching” Sana murmured feeling a bit embarrassed at the gesture.

“Please bring Mina with you” Chaeyoung suggested “the more the merrier” she added.

“Of course, I will” Sana assured the small drummer. “You can invite your friends as well; the place is quite big”

“Oh right! I will invite Sohye, she said she wanted to meet my bandmates” Chaeng excitedly said.

“Sohye? I think I’ve heard her name before” the brunette commented trying to recall where on earth she encountered that name.

“She’s appeared on a drama before, as a supporting role, she’s been appearing on dramas more frequently now that’s why it sounded familiar” the drummer explained earning a nod from Sana who is now remembering the girl.

Momo isn’t paying attention to the discussion and is minding her own business by plugging her earphones again while listening to good music for inspiration. Creating music has always been her way to escape from difficult situation.

++

“Mina, we’re going to my resort this coming weekend with Jeong’s band. You will come, right? You should! Momo is coming as well” Sana said from the other line of the phone. She immediately called the younger girl after she arrived home so Mina could clear any of her schedules, if any, next weekend.

“What?!” Mina replied in panic, hearing Momo’s name always stir her emotions.

“I cannot… I-I’m busy that day…” the younger girl excused but Sana didn’t buy Mina’s reason. She knew better.

“Mina, sweetie, you can’t fool me. What happened? Why don’t you want to see Momo?”

With a long sigh, Mina cleared hard. She really can’t hide anything from Sana, can she? The thing is she really isn’t avoiding Momo, she’s just scared, after their last encounter, Mina felt that Momo doesn’t want her around. She’s afraid that if she pursues her, she might stray further away.

“Momo might still be mad at me” she dejectedly said which is apparent with her dispirited tone.

“How come?” the brunette’s a bit confused on what Mina was talking about.

“When I visited her place last time, I was welcomed with a drunk Momo lying on the floor. I stayed there for the night, trying to be useful in case she needed someone. But when she woke up, she suddenly told me to leave… and she looked annoyed while saying that…”

Sana’s getting the point. But she thought that Mina’s just scared to face Momo so she decided to wake her up to her senses.

“Momo looked for you earlier” Sana dropped the bomb. And that was a straight hit to Mina’s heart. She didn’t want to expect much but she felt a bit relieved that the singer asked about her.

“R-really?”

“Why would I lie? Girl, you’re really whipped. I have never seen this side of you before. Let me tell you this, if you really want to be with her, be prepared to feel more pain. That’s how love works. You’ve just started and you’re already this scared.” Sana scolded her friend to realize the consequences of her actions.

“It’s not that I’m scared, I just don’t want her to end up hating me because I’m too persistent. I think she’s still not over her ex. She sleep-talked last night, I think her name is Nayeon” the younger girl tried to recall the name.

“Nayeon?! Her ex is Nayeon? The actress?” Sana suddenly sat up surprised by the revelation. Jeongyeon has told her few information about Momo’s past relationship earlier before she went home and the vocalist had mentioned that Momo’s ex is popular. She’s like putting the puzzle pieces together and now it made sense.

“You know her, Sana?” Mina was curious at how much Sana knows about the singer.

“She’s the one I told you before. The lead actress of After Moon, she’s Im Nayeon. Her name’s been always in the news, and scandals are always following her”

Mina was trying to recall but she couldn’t remember what Sana told her before.

“I don’t remember you telling me about her, but I guess I have to do my research, bye! Ah, and yes, I’ll come with you this weekend. I decided to not avoid Momo I had to clear things with her” Mina ended the call and immediately browsed the net for Im Nayeon’s profile and anything she could find about her. She’s pretty, maybe that’s why Momo couldn’t move on from her. She saw some insider articles about the actress’ dating scandals and it piqued her curiosity so she reads each one of them. All of the articles were pointed at Hyun Bin, the producer and it was enough for Mina to understand the situation. Nayeon left Momo for Hyun Bin or she would rather say for money and fame. Momo doesn’t deserve her. Mina thought, and she felt sorry for how Momo was still affected with her. She falls into the bed, feeling her body subside in the soft mattress while staring blankly to the ceiling. Her mind’s been full of thoughts of the singer and she closed her eyes, preparing to see her even in her sleep.

++

It was a fine Saturday morning and the band members are now on their way to Sana’s family resort. They were riding this rented van and Jeongyeon became their driver while Momo is sitting in the front, dozing while listening to music, Chaeyoung and her friend Sohye was situated at the back busy with their phones, well Sohye is trying to take a picture of Momo’s side profile without getting caught. She finds Momo attractive with how she carries herself, or maybe she’s just her type.

“Hey, we’re here. Momo, wake up” Jeongyeon nudged Momo’s shoulder which made the singer return to reality.

The place is indeed huge, more than what they could imagine. “We really are friends with rich people” Chaeyoung blurted as they were greeted by Sana and Mina at the main lobby of the hotel.

Mina went there with Sana earlier this morning. When the band members arrived, her eyes couldn’t help but to find Momo who is silently following behind the group slinging the guitar at her back. Mina also noticed an unfamiliar face with the group. Then Chaeyoung remembered that she has to introduce her friend to them properly.

“Oh, I forgot, this is Kim Sohye, my college friend who is also an actress. Sohye, these are my bandmates, Momo and Jeongyeon, while these are Sana and Mina, uhm our very rich friends” she said while giggling at the last statement.

“Hi, nice to meet you!” she gave a very sweet smile to everyone. Mina thought that this girl is a pure definition of cute and sweet. But when she saw how the girl looked at Momo, she felt something’s not right. Maybe because she can see herself at how she looked at the singer. Sohye is a threat, never in her life she was in a position that she has to be alarmed that someone might take away something from her. In a moment, the girl turned her head towards Mina’s direction, as if she felt that she’s being watched, and she;s not wrong, Mina’s glaring at her.

Mina felt provoked when Sohye smirked at her when their eyes met. Like telling her that she’s not gonna back down. That she can win her battles. She thought that she has to make a move or else this foxy girl will steal her chances. Their staring contest were interrupted when Sana started to speak.

“Guys, let’s head to our floor, I reserved the entire penthouse so we can use the pool, and there were three rooms available, Mina and I will share with one, and it’s up to you to decide how you will divide yourselves with the two remaining rooms.”

They went up, and was again, amazed by how huge the penthouse and how beautiful the view is from up there, the entire floor was surrounded by high glass walls, so you can stargaze at night. It has everything, they even have a bar counter, a game area where you can play billiards and more, a huge kitchen- which they won’t be needing since the hotel serves great food, and three spacious bedrooms.

“You guys settle first, then I’ll tour you outside the beach” the brunette said and the four went to their rooms. Momo just took her bag and scanned the place and saw Mina heading to her shared room with Sana. She admits she owed the girl an apology but she felt that the girl is uncomfortable with her so she let the opportunity slide this time, taking a mental note that she would talk to her later.

“Momo, would you want to share your room with me?” Sohye suddenly appeared in front of the singer. Momo finds Sohye like her little sister, well basically because she’s a bit young and small like Chaeyoung. “I don’t really mind” Momo answered which made Mina’s head jolts in shock. She heard everything, and she hated the fact that Momo agreed to the sly girl’s wishes, but she’s in no position to be pressed at something like that. She couldn’t believe she just lost her first battle that easily. Mina, you’re not good at losing. Deal with her later. She reminds herself, trying to be positive.

++

Sana toured the group around the vicinity. The place is peaceful and there were few tourists around. When the group decided to swim, Momo stayed behind the coast, she said she doesn’t want to swim and would just sleep in the beach chair under the shade of the umbrella. Mina was a bit disappointed that Momo’s not joining them. She wanted to stay behind with Momo as well, but Sana dragged her towards the waters as they took they outer clothes off.

Momo glanced at the group who were enjoying the beach, and her eyes easily find Mina, the girl is beautiful indeed and Momo couldn’t deny that. She has the aura of that belongs to the highest class of society, well she did belong to the Myoui clan, which is the richest family in Korea. She was like looking at the real life national treasure.

When Momo was almost getting her sleep, she was distracted when her skin came into contact with the dripping body of someone who suddenly sat beside her. Slowly opening her eyes, adjusting to the sunlight, she saw Sohye, now wiping her body with dry towel.

“What are you doing here? Are you guys done swimming?” Momo asked and she glanced behind the girl and saw her friends are still in the waters.

“They aren’t done yet… I thought you’re lonely being alone here so I decided to join you” the younger girl said which made Momo look at her blankly. Well, it wasn’t new that someone would tell her that, she’s always been aloof around people. And she thought that Sohye’s just being considerate. Clearing , she sat up and took her sunglasses.

“Don’t bother, you should be enjoying with them” the singer said as she pats Sohye’s head before heading towards the hotel. The young actress stood still, a bit surprised at the gesture. Sohye felt more infatuated to her with just a pat on her head.

Mina saw the two and she felt a bit frustrated with Sohye. That kid really is taking every opportunity she has while she, on the other hand, couldn’t even bring herself to talk to Momo ever since that day. She couldn’t help but to blame herself for being too sensitive that time that now she finds every opportunity disappearing one by one.

++

It’s getting dark so the group decided to retreat to the penthouse. When they arrived, they saw Momo sitting at the bean bag situated at the corner of the living room, playing with her guitar- the one given by Mina. Mina saw it and she couldn’t be any happier that Momo’s been using her gift. Jeongyeon called Momo which made the singer stop what she’s doing since it’s already time for their most awaited dinner, and she knew Momo would drop anything for food.

The group gathered at the dining area feasting to Minatozaki chef’s specialty. They were assisted with the hotel’s bartender and waiters. Loud sound started to play and the group started partying, the drummer leading the sound system. Mina was pulled by Sana towards the group gathering around the game room, they were starting to play the Drink or Dare drinking game.

“Okay, we’re all of legal age so I don’t see any problem with playing this game” Jeongyeon said while shuffling the deck of cards that has the dares on them.

“I’ll have to pass” Momo refused to join since she doesn’t want to get wasted again. She took her seat at the side in a comfortable couch, clasping her guitar. Mina felt dispirited that the singer is not participating.

“Ah that’s okay, at least there’s someone who will be sober after this game” the blonde laughed at her own statement.

The group started the game, at Sana’s turn, the card she has drawn was to dance on the table and she was able to do it but the group was laughing hard at how awkward her dance was. Next was Chaeyoung, who couldn’t do a cartwheel so she has to drink instead. When it was Sohye’s turn, Mina doesn’t know if the kid has a black magic or something that turns the card on her favor, the girl has drawn a card that says ‘kiss someone you like in the room’. Mina knew what will happen next, and she’s right. Sohye stood up from her seat, which made the group pay attention to her and was surprised when she approached the lone singer at the couch.

Momo halted what she was doing when she noticed Sohye walking towards her direction. In an instant, the girl suddenly sat on her lap and all eyes are on them. The room became silent and Momo could only hear the sound of their breath. Sohye leaned forward, giving Momo an open mouthed kiss. The singer was caught off guard by the sudden contact but when she realized what’s happening, she pushed the girl’s shoulder, pulling away from the kiss.

It was hard for Mina, having to witness the person you love kissing someone is just too much to handle for her. Her hands were trembling, displeased at the scene. Sana noticed how Mina reacted and she knew Mina is not fine. She wanted to blame this game that this had to happen, but the damage has been done. Mina stood up, excused herself from the group. She felt suffocated at the room, now, she’s calming her nerves down at the huge balcony grasping for fresh air but her vexation still lingers. She wanted to be at Sohye’s place that moment, she wanted to be the one in that situation. Why does she feel that she’s becoming more and more distant to Momo. With thoughts running wild in her head, her tears fell down. Oh God, I’m so pathetic.

She stayed in the balcony for God knows how long but she felt she’s been staying there for hours. Thinking of going back inside, a knock in the glass door interrupted her thoughts and what she saw surprised her so much.

“Momo?” the singer opened the door and sat beside Mina in the balcony’s bench.

“Did I disturb you?” the older girl asked but Mina isn’t believing what she’s seeing right now, that Momo just initiated the conversation.

“No- Not at all” she said under her breath feeling a bit nervous on what might occur.

“I really wanted to have this chance to talk to you” Momo started as she glanced toward the girl beside her. Momo exhaled before continuing, she finds it hard to articulate well her thoughts since she’s not used to this kind of situation where she had to apologize to someone because of her behavior.

“I’m sorry about last time, I was being rude, and also I would like to thank you for helping me that night, I owe you” Momo said feeling embarrassed at her mood that time.

She was dazed by Momo’s statement. She didn’t know that Momo wanted to apologize this much, and here she was thinking that Momo hated her for being too sensitive and prying. Maybe she’s overthinking and she’s been wasting her time worrying for nothing.

“I actually thought that you’re mad at me…” Mina told her, feeling all nervous around the singer again.

“No- Not at all” Momo defended. Waving her hands in denial. Then there was a momentary silence.

Mina’s still a bit uneasy after the scene she had witnessed a while ago and remembering them made her insides churn. The beautiful moonlight spilled over them, enough to emphasize Momo’s features. She glanced at Momo’s lips. What will it feel like? Her lips on mine. Her heart began to beat erratically. Her mind couldn’t fight against the thoughts that were going through her. Her very smell is flooding her senses now. It’s like she couldn’t control her body as she was now leaning so close to Momo. She couldn’t remember if she had drink more than she could but she felt her mind stopped functioning when her lips landed on Momo’s. Her mind went blank, feeling weak at the contact. At a pace, she parted her lips, delving deep into the kiss. She never knew it would feel this intoxicating and she doesn’t want to stop, she couldn’t stop.

Momo was surprised herself when she kissed Mina back. The moment she saw the look in Mina’s eyes, she was lost, and everything just happened. When they broke apart for air, Momo stared into the younger girl’s eyes. Still catching their breaths, Mina felt embarrassed with their unexpected kiss, she looked away.

There was an unsettling atmosphere around them, no one’s moving a muscle, and no one’s talking. Not until Momo suddenly spoke which made Mina tensed.

“Do you love me?”

Her eyes opened wide at the question as she jolted her head to face the singer. With mouth slightly open, she swallowed as she felt becoming dry. She’s sure of her feelings, she really does love her. She wouldn’t give her first kiss to her if she isn’t in love with her.

“I do… I love you…” Mina said feeling her body burning up, she wanted Momo so bad that she’s feeling all these mix of emotions, now she doesn’t know how to stop. “I love everything about you, I love how you took care of me that night, I love your passion in creating music. You are kind, you’re warm, you’re making everyone around you feel safe” the younger girl blurted that she had to bite her tongue, stopping herself from embarrassing herself more in front of Momo. She already confessed, exposing her emotions in the open and now it’s tormenting that Momo couldn’t even say a word after her statement.

“Do you really like me that much?” Momo was surprised at how Mina sees her. She wasn’t paying attention but the girl finds everything about her endearing. Mina responded with a soft nod.

“I-I wasn’t expecting that, I’m sorry” Momo didn’t know what to say, she felt that she took advantage of Mina’s feelings, by kissing her back and all.

“You don’t have to be sorry, you don’t have to respond to my confession… But can I ask you a favor?” the younger girl suddenly found the courage to say what’s been going on her mind. The singer looked at her “Go ahead” she said.

“Would you let me stay with you having these feelings?” Mina was serious, and Momo was caught in between of not allowing the girl to keep her away from potential misery and letting her stay to give herself a chance.

“Yes, you can” Momo decided, letting the girl do what she wished, and also for her to be free from the lingering pain caused by Nayeon.

Everyone deserves a chance.

It was a big step closer to Momo. It was almost like acknowledging her feelings. She couldn’t be happier when the singer let her stay with her. Slipping her lip upwards, Momo gave her a faint smile and opened her arms for a hug. The younger girl melts in her embrace. It was warm. She knew, it will take time, but she would wait patiently.  

++