The first memories I had of coming into this world was the feeling of being squeezed out of something warm and slippery. I couldn’t see nor hear anything, but I felt my mom’s tongue me all over, my first contact with the one who birthed me.

I remembered being weightless for a while, as if I was swimming again in my mom’s belly. Human hands held me up and gently nudged me against something soft. I caught my first whiff of milk, the aroma was enticing. I instinctively opened my mouth and latched onto the source of the scent, and led. Something warm flowed down my throat, it felt… right. I latched on tighter as I coaxed more of the invigorating liquid out, gaining strength as I did so.

I was then aware of other similar bodies around me, emitting the same noises as I. My brothers and sisters, apparently. My mom was still birthing then, I could feel her tired heartbeats reverberating through my body, occasionally shifting about, threatening to unlatch me from my meal, as more duplicates of me were given life.

I was abruptly pulled from my feast after a while, as human hands once again made me fly as I felt a flexible object being wrapped around my neck. I was then put onto a surface which made me shiver and squirm, it felt uncomfortable. That experience was brief though, I was returned to and left against the familiar warmth of my mom and her soothing tongue massages.

Contented, I slept.

It was several cycles of feeding later when I was able to open my eyes and take in my mom, my siblings and the enticing sources of energy in front of me. My siblings looked similar, brownish black bundles of fur, white underpaws and large dark eyes. Some had patches of white around their mouths and noses. They all smelled the same, of our mom’s milk and the scent of whatever she ate before she administered our regular baths.

I was no longer deaf as well. I do wish I was though. I have to battle constantly with these other noisy wriggling objects to get at my mother’s furry warmth and her rich, delicious milk. We have to trample over one another (or get stepped on) in order to satisfy our hunger.

I tried to take control. But my littermates didn’t seem to understand. I would grab one by the back of the neck, and two or three others would jump on top of me. By the time I had shaken them off, the brother I’d been trying to teach a lesson to would be wrestling with someone else, dislodging others in the process. If I tried a menacing growl, all my brothers and sisters just growled joyously back.

So irritating.

When I wasn’t trying to educate my littermates on who’s the boss, I’d explore a little. I heard a lot of barking, and I smelled other dogs nearby. I would crawl from under the pile of limbs that was the battlefield and looked around. The floor was hard and cold, and after a few steps my nose bumped against a wire fence. I was in a cage on the cement floor.

Across my side of the wire I see other dogs of all shapes and sizes, puppies too. The pups didn’t have my black fur and markings, but they looked like jolly little furballs. Might’ve been fun to play with, if not for the wire separating us.

There was a door on the other side of the cage. Every day a woman would open it and bring bowls of food for my mother and other adult dogs. She would open the door to our cage and put the food down. My mother would get up, shake off a clingy puppy or two, and devoured her food, coming back to us as quickly as she could.

I’d always hopped over to the side of the cage closest to the door when this happened, and looked out at the world beyond these 4 walls. I couldn’t see much from this angle, only more foreboding slabs of vertical concrete. But I did catch whiffs of new scents: other dogs, other humans, and something earthy. I’d prance around the cage in anticipation of catching the next glimpse of whatever awaits us outside.

It didn’t take long before I got my wish, another few feeds later.

The woman brought out a smaller cage and left bowls full of solid food in it. She then opened the door to our cage and gave my mother her meal, and waited for her to start. As soon as my mother’s attention was fully on her food, the woman stealthily scooped up a handful of my siblings and gently put them into the other cage. Satisfied, she stood up and started closing the gate to my cage.

No! Wait for me!!! I scrambled towards the closing trap as fast as my wobbly legs could take, launching myself into a slide and barely made it through before the portal of opportunity closed on me. I did however skid onto the hard floor outside from the momentum and tumbled paws-over-head before face planting into the wired cage, my littermates looking on.

My first embarrassment.

“Why hi little fella! You want to join in the fun as well?” The woman squatted down with a bemused look and picked me up, inspecting my face for signs of injury. Satisfied I was unhurt, she plopped me down together with my siblings and left the room.

The other annoying copies of me were already climbing over each other getting at the food bowls. I butted two of my sisters aside and squeezed in between the others and ate my fill. It was delicious, and it felt so satisfying to chew something solid instead of milk.

When my stomach was full, I lifted my head from the bowl and looked around me.

Mother had finished her meal and was pacing around the cage whimpering at us. Waves of anxiety and concern radiated from her. My other food-filled siblings heard her and added onto the chorus, pawing at the cold wired barrier separating us and comfort. I didn’t bother joining in, excited as I was about this new development, wondering what was going to happen next. The excitement didn’t last long though, as we settled our filled bellies down onto the floor of the cage, our first solid food experience lulled us into a contented slumber, one by one. I peered at my mother through heavy lids and raised my nose, trying to catch the scent of her and the wondrous milk she possessed. I somehow knew then, it would be the last time I would see her.

Then… darkness…

“Mom! Look at this one! He’s really cute!”

I woke up to a cacophony of sounds from all around me. I perked my ears. Human voices and dog yelps – many, amongst other new sounds I have no idea what or who they belong to. My eyes flickered open.

Two pairs of human eyes were looking down at me, a large female and a reduced version of the same. A girl, as they called these things, jumped excitedly seeing me awake. I didn’t so much pay attention to her, instead scrambling to my feet and looked around. Unfamiliar sights, sounds and scents from all around assaulted my senses.

I have arrived in a city.

I was in a so called “pet shop”, a place where humans of all shapes and sizes come in and out, peering into the see-thru walls myself and other doggies are boxed in. I couldn’t count the number of times when I would bump my nose into these cheat barriers. They are great for climbing though, my paws would find purchase on them somewhat and I would be able to push myself up and sniff at the endless pairs of human hands who seemed to like to descend into my “tank” and pet on me. Some of those hands smelled great, some smelled of food while some had scents of some other animal I found revolting.

I was lifted out from the tank from time to time, the human lady who “owned” the shop would take me out and place me into the arms of “potential buyers”. I didn’t quite like being handled by these people and would often show my displeasure by growling or trying to struggle out of their hands. These would usually end with the owner lady putting me back into my tank with an angry look. The customers would normally leave the shop with the owner lady bowing frantically all the way to the door, or another doggie would be chosen and get taken away with their new “owner” after the humans crowd around a beeping box on the counter.

The rest of the time, I would just keep to myself in my little tank, marking my scent at the corners when I need to go and helping myself to food and water in bowls left by the owner. I would entertain myself by barking at big moving boxes zooming past the shop. When night falls and the big ball of yellow heat disappears from the sky. The show owner would conjure white tubes of light above our heads for a while longer, then shuts them off and closes the shop, leaving us in darkness. There would be nothing left to do but lay down and enter dreamland.

Everyday would be a repeat of the previous, until that fateful day.

It was one of the regular nights when I was just minding my own business as usual. Two human females appeared at the windows and looked in. One was much shorter than the other, both adult, as by now I could differentiate how adults and children look like from their faces and clothes.

They squabbled for a while standing outside before the taller one turned and walked away. Shortie shouted something after her and ran over, pulling her back and into the shop.

“You are not running away! Get your in here and shut up!” Shortie sounded agitated.

“Unnie! I don’t need a dog! I am fine with how things are now!”

“Hayoung-ah, listen to me. Unnie want to see you open up to your new colleagues ok? It’s been 3 weeks since you’ve joined and not even once you’ve tried socialising with them.”

“That’s just me! What does having a dog got to do with this?”

“Of course it does! A dog will do wonders to that distant attitude of yours! Time for you to learn how to give and receive. We need you softened up!”

“Here! Look at this cute little puppy!” Shortie locked eyes with me, walked over to my tank and pulled me out roughly. Hey! Go easy on me! She me forcefully, then held me out towards Hayoung.

I did what any self-respecting puppy would do in my situation, I latched onto her hand and bit down, hard.

The next moments were surreal. I heard a yelp and found myself launched into the air. Everything that transpired seemed to be in slow motion. I saw Shortie rubbing her hand looking down in horror at the two holes I proudly marked. Shop owner lady was rushing towards me with a shocked expression, mouth agape. I instinctively started flailing my limbs, desperately trying to imitate those flying things with long pointy mouths whom I observed flying around the streets outside. It didn’t work.

The ground seemed to rush up to me. I closed my eyes.

Poof

I didn’t hit the ground. Someone caught me.

I opened my eyes to be greeted by a gleaming set of orbs gazing right at me. It belonged to the human called Hayoung. She held me gently and looked me over, a worried expression on her face. Satisfied I was unhurt, she brought me close and whispered, ”I’m glad you’re ok.” She smelled soothing, I felt comfort.

I kissed her for the first time, a quick flick of my tongue across her luscious lips.

Within an hour, I was on the way with my new owner to a place I called, home.