Cho Kyuhyun is lying on his bed in his boxers (his sleeping gear) in the middle of the day. Instead of studying for his final exams he’s there trying to come up with ways to have enough money to pay for his last term and the graduation fees. His scholarship couldn’t cover his school expenses plus he needs extra money for his survival. He chose to live off campus and stay at the small house he inherited from his parents. The savings they left also wasn’t that much. Although a bright student he never realized that owning a house is not that simple. (Give him a break, he majored in music). He received a notice that the house mortgage hasn’t been paid for the last three years and that it is due in a few weeks. Or else….

     “Where on earth can I get that amount of money? And in three weeks?! Mom, Dad shouldn’t I just have sold the house back then and lived on campus instead of having this problem?” He said out loud. But he immediately covered his mouth and said sorry to the souls of his parents.

     A knock on his front door snapped him from his reverie. “Just a minute.” He said aloud as he hurriedly put on a loose pants and a pale blue shirt.

      As he opened the door a blur of a person rammed into him with a hug.      “Kyuhyun-ah!” The bundle shouted.

     He thought he recognized the voice. “Donghae-hyung??!” he asked and held what he estimated to be the bundles shoulders away from him to try and confirm his suspicion. He’s right.

     “So what brings you back here?” Kyuhyun asked for he knew that Donghae and his family moved out of the next village to try and start “a new life in the city” after graduating from high school.

     “I want to find somebody I left behind here years ago.” Donghae said as he followed Kyuhyun to the small kitchen. Kyuhyun remembered he hasn’t eaten yet and he invited Donghae to join him. They continue to talk as Kyuhyun prepared a simple meal. Toast and Eggs.

     “No wonder you lost weight since the last time I saw you. You used to be almost the size of Shindong-hyung. Now you’re as thin as Hyuk…” Donghae pursed his lips as Kyuhyun looked back at him.

     “You were saying?” Kyuhyun raised an eyebrow as he began to understand who Donghae came back for.

     “Nobody. Just don’t pay attention to what I just said. Say can I crash here even for just a few days? I’ll help with some of the expenses of course. And we could start by going to the market or the grocery to buy some decent food to fatten you up a bit.”

      Kyuhyun just smiled. He can never say no because even though Donghae is a couple of years older than him and lived in the other village, he was such a good friend back then and they both know that the brotherly bond between is still strong after all these years no matter if one of them moved.

     They updated on each others lives to and from the market. But Donghae was holding back something from Kyuhyun. Kyuhyun felt it but didn’t force his friend to talk. He let Donghae use his old room since he was already using his parents’ bedroom after they passed away in a car crash a few years ago. He moved not because it was bigger but because he feels he is still connected to his parents in this room.

***

     “Hyung! I’ll be leaving for school in a few minutes, do you think you’ll be alright here while I’m away? I won’t be back until late in the afternoon ‘cause you know I still have to commute.” He told the door leading to the other room.

     He heard a loud yawn coming from inside then the door opened. Donghae stepped out clad only in boxers. Topless. One arm stretching up in another yawn while the other hand scratched his nape.

     Donghae blinked a couple of times to focus his sight. “Oh, Kyuhyun-ah on your way to school now? I’ll be fine don’t worry about me. Besides I’ll also be leaving this afternoon. For work. Nightshift.” Then he waved goodbye to Kyuhyun and went back to sleep.

     Kyuhyun is still puzzled with his hyungs behavior but he shrugged it off thinking that he has much bigger problems to solve right now.

***   

      Kyuhyun arrived back home just as Donghae stepped out of the bathroom rubbing his hair with a thin towel looking a bit like this morning. Clad in boxers and topless.

      “You’re back.” Donghae smiled as he sees Kyuhyun putting down his things. “I have already cooked so you don’t have to worry about your dinner and just study for your exam. I’m just going to prepare for work right now.” Then he went inside the room.

      Kyuhyun went to the kitchen to look at the food Donghae prepared. There’s enough food for the two of them. He set up the table and called out to Donghae.            “Hyung! You have prepared too much food for me to eat alone. Come out now and let’s eat together before you go.”

     Donghae came out wearing a short faux-leather jacket and a thin v-neck shirt paired with a skin-tight jeans and boots. He found Kyuhyun staring at him with a slight arching of a brow. He laughed softly. “I know you’d be wondering why I have to go to work at night and by the look you’re giving me I can say that you’re trying to guess what I really do for a living.”

     Kyuhyun stayed silent. He’s letting Donghae gather up the courage to tell him his secret.

     “Can you please promise not to judge me? Well, at least not verbally because I know people can’t help what they think.”

     “I won’t. We’re friends and friends don’t judge each other. Besides, I know that you wouldn’t have been in this situation if there wasn’t a good reason behind it.”

     “Okay then.” Donghae puffed his cheeks and sighed.  “I’m a male e.”

     Kyuhyun just kept silent. Donghae then continued.

     “You know what I wanted to be back then right?  Well, I only got to finish my first semester in college when we went to the city because my father became seriously ill and had to be confined at the hospital for a very long time. At first, I can still go to school and take care of him at the hospital later while my mother works. But I can’t focus on my studies anymore because I kept on thinking how we could actually survive now that our debts are starting to pile up even if my mother works at two jobs. Her salary almost always goes to the payment of hospital bills. My allowance for school and the house expense comes from loans from friends and family.” He stopped for a while and looked at Kyuhyun who only looked back at him with a nod that seem to say, “Go on tell me more. I’m here. I’ll listen to you.”

     So Donghae continued with his story.

     “I decided to tell my mom that I’m going to stop schooling and try to help her out-financially. She didn’t want to let me at first but I persuaded her. She told me I didn’t have any experience so how can I find work. I made a deal with her. I told her that I won’t stop going to school just yet unless I find work but she should stop going to her other job once I got one. She didn’t agree with that saying even if I find work, she’d still do her double job because she wants me to use the money I’ll be earning for myself and my studies. My father eventually died after about a year in the hospital and mom also got sick later probably because of working hard and a broken heart. She loves my father so much.” Tears started to roll on Donghae’s face as memories of his family flash through his head. He tried to continue but he can’t because he’s choking on his words. Kyuhyun went around the table to comfort him.

     “I won’t try to tell you to hush now because everything is going to be okay because it’s not. It’s not okay to lose your parents when you’re still young. It’s not okay when you don’t know what to do with your life because you have depended on your parents’ guidance so much. It’s not okay when you finally find yourself neck deep in debts you didn’t know your parents had and that you still have to pay for it. It’s not okay, really, it’s not.” Kyuhyun tried to look away and bite down on his quivering lips to stop his own tears from falling but he couldn’t. Their stories are much too similar to ignore. And he wondered if this is also the path that he’s gonna have to take in order to pay off his parents’ debts. He knows he doesn’t want to leave this house. This is the only thing that his parents’ have built from their own earnings and this is the only solid thing they have left for him.

     When the tears stopped falling and they are wiping their faces, they looked at each other and smiled sheepishly.

     “Can we eat now?” Kyuhyun asked to lighten their mood.

     Donghae laughed. “Of course.”

     They ate and they talked about random things but half of Kyuhyun’s mind is wandering off. Thinking if he had to, can he do what Donghae did to survive?

***