Dirty, little secret

The All-American Rejects

I'll keep you my dirty little secret
(Dirty little secret)
Don't tell anyone, or you'll be just another regret
(Just another regret, hope that you can keep it)
My dirty little secret

The night is falling down and the stars shine over his eyes. All alone, he greets the darkness, not even surrounded by the cheerful barks of the dogs. It’s lonely, it’s sad, it borders depression been left behind by the people who have sworn to be always by his side, but that didn’t hinder them from going out.

Song Minho is having drinks with his new friend Seo Eunkwang, from BTOP, who has finally mutter the courage to ask him his number; since then, they have been texting, postposing the fateful meeting due to tight agendas and schedules – but Minho has managed to visit Jihoon twice under the excuse to play games and clubbing once with Woo Jiho, too, within the past month. And if he isn’t hanging out with friends, he is reclosed in the studio with Seungyoon, working their way for another successful comeback, composing and writing separately but, somehow, in the same page, in perfect synchrony. He also works on it, but he is a morning person, unlike his mates; they can only function under the moonbeams, the owls chirping in the blackness of the sky and the city below flashing like stargazing, high in the ground.

There is nothing to say about Seungyoon; he hasn’t seen him in the past few days; when he is awake, he is sleeping, so it’s unlike for them to meet, not even to share a meal – and he knows that he is still alive because, from time to time, he finds bottles of yogurt in the bin. But most of the time he has to threaten Seungyoon to come back home, to take a break and relax with him; but not tonight.

He usually is content with this array, how things are, since he can always rely on Jinwoo to keep him company, to play video games or do a VLive together. He is the one who stays in the most, proclaiming that he doesn’t have any friends outside his inner circle composed by Seungyoon, Minho and Seunghoon himself. Usually, if he is meeting with someone – in those rare and nearly unique occasions, they would come, like that day when Jinwoo and Jinhwan had had to call the locksmith because they couldn’t leave the house, door blocked and yelling filling the dawn, loud enough for him to think they were drunk and crazy.

Today but, instead of staying home and have dinner with him, maybe even having a round of games while petting Haute, he has gone to meet Eric Nam, the perfect boy who has snatched his hyung since they have encountered while filming Wizards of Nowhere. Seunghoon admits, openly, that he admires the singer, that he loves his cover of “Bravo My Life” and he is not a fan, but has listened to all his songs and has some sympathy for him after watching his first apparition as a cast member on the show.

That doesn’t mean that he is happy about the fact that Kim Jinwoo is leaving him behind to have dinner with him – when he is the type who skips late night meals.
He feels outraged, abandoned, cross and annoyed. He has to do something to burn all the piled up frustration – not only because of his friends having a life outside him, he does have other people which he hangs out sometimes, of course, but this is not the case. He is irritated, Jinwoo leaving has been the last drop, his heart sinking and his mind spinning and the couch feels so hard against his back.

He thinks that, maybe, he should call one of his other colleagues, some of the buddies he used to dance with, but the empty phone, with no messages from no one prickles his hand, starting, screen gleaming at him and his eyes twitched, defeated.

He checks the time; it’s not that late, he thinks. Also, doesn’t Jinwoo do this all the time? He turns the app on and greets, cheerfully, the few viewers that, slowly, are gathering there.

“They have left me alone” he complains, pouting and whining at the camera, feeling totally dejected but the fans are talking to him, telling all these things he needs to hear and it’s funny again “and since none of them wanted to do this with me, today I’m going to reveal some of their dirty, little secrets!” he proclaims, excitedly, and the messages cheering for it befall, thousands of people boosting him to disclose them, to unveil the truth behind the perfect men they believe they are.
Seunghoon assures himself that it’s alright; it’s not as if they will be watching or someone will tell them – and if this happens, then they will learn not to abandon him like a doll on the streets, so it will worth all the nags. Also, how can he shame Seungyoon anymore than he did it to himself? It’s not as if Minho hasn’t done some silly, stupid acts in front of fans and Jinwoo, well, this little one will be a pushover, but he knows how to deal with him anyway. He thinks hard for a moment before deciding the harmless stuff that he could recall – things that most of their fans probably already know, but this will be only the start, the beginning of Winner’s fall down; get ready it’s show time!

He finds the best spot in the house to film himself and, while settling things, the camera rattles with the movement, showing the not-so-secret inside of the well-known “Dog House”. Seunghoon finally sits on one of the puffs that are scattered around his own room, bare feet, feeling the green grass tickling his skin, grey shirt and his comfortable pants from Thailand that he likes the most. He glances around, assuring that he is, indeed, very alone and that the dogs aren’t awake, ready to ruin the fun.

“So, let’s get it started!” he proclaims, joyful, smirking deviant at the phone, his most malicious grin perfectly in place. “First of, Kang Seungyoon” and he spells his name carefully, making sure that they understand who is he going to peel off first, “our leader-maknae who thinks that he is y. He truly believes it” he stresses, “but, the truth is that he lives in delusional land. Have you seen his face? With these fluffy cheeks of him and his plump, cherry lips, no one would ever call him an adult. Not to mention” he says, a guffaw ready to leave his lips “his very, adult-like taste. He is a kidult at most! Who drinks yoghurts at his middle twenty? Only kids do that. And, of course, he can’t handle spicy food, or bitterness. Damn, the only coffee he can take is the one drowned in vanilla essence! One of these days he is going to be poisoned with all the sugar he eats. Talking about eating… he is such a disaster! There are only a few dishes he likes and he eats them all the time – you know, like his recent addition, Nasi Goren, - he would ingest them all day until getting sick. We have to force him to taste and try new things, but then, he frowns and whimpers. And the nagging! The infinite nagging! For someone that young, he scowls us all the time. The worst part is, of course, how pleasant he looks while doing it, how much he enjoys it” he sighs, heavily, before continuing. By now, the chat room has been filled with all kind of lighting expressions and he is delighted to read them all. “So, yes, Kang Seungyoon is only our baby. Gosh, I have to remember him to shower and to change his underwear still” and this last bit is not new, it has been revealed in national TV, while filming their first show “Winner TV” – and please, give the creative mind behind the title a round of applause –, when Jinwoo said that he wouldn’t mind sleeping in the same room if only he showered first and took care of his hygiene, and since then, nothing much has changed – just the fact that now there are fewer people around him to complain about his sour smell early in the morning. At the current moment, there is only him to tell. “And he is a lair, really. Do you remember when he said he didn’t like dolls that he kept them because fans gave them? Well, then, if that is the case, why does he sleep surrendered by them every night? Even now that he has Thor; dolls are still all over his bed. Not to mention how he pouts with his plump, marshmallow lips. But, yes, he is a total adult, right Inseos?” he reviews, smirking snarky.

“Let’s move on to our next target: Song Minho. Do you know how he is all about Jinwoo? He must be the only member he care