Hi! My name is Choi Sooyoung. If you think the only thing I loved the most is food. Well, think again. HAHA! Actually, I had a confession, and I really cant help holding it on any longer, will you mind lending me your ears? *sigh* okay, here goes :

During my trainee days, I've met a girl, by the name Jessica, Jessica Jung Sooyeon. Although she is a cool, proud, a whatever-person, with her so called "
Ice Princess" attitude scares off everyone easily, and that, is what I couldn't resist myself to befriend with a bad girl.My frist time approaching her? 
Well, thank you very very much to my best friend, Yuri. We played "Truth or Dare" and she dared me to ask for Jessica's phone number. 
And that is when I fell in love with her.
But this time, I really had to thank Yuri, for letting me know Jessica, for being her friend, for loving her, despite her coldness. I really fell for her.

We had been friends for almost 10 years now, and still counting.

My first fight with Jessica was when she told me she was dating Donghae, which leads into Donghae's misunderstanding. 
YUCKS! Who the hell likes Donghae? But to my surprise, her. She fell for him!
I never liked Donghae, though we're in the same label company, pfft!
We didnt talk for a few days. But I gave in anyways, because, yeah, you're right, I just cant live a day without talking or staring at her, 
even though we're in the same band called Girls' Generation.

Because of our hectic schedule, adding in her dating "schedule", we hardly talked, to be exact, we never talked. It was like the worst 3 years of my life. 
I never dared tell anyone about my feelings towards her, my hate towards him.
We see each other under the same building, we trained in the same practice room, but that guy, he never gives Jessica any space, rude much?!
But what can I do? To sigh and curse.

Time flies by slowly without a sound, me without knowing that I still, actually liked her, waiting for her, waiting for something that could not happen, for the impossible.
She liked him since, I dont know when, before both Super Junior and Girls' Generation debuted? How could I break it? Im not that kind of a person to do such ruthless action, 
especially when it's involving her.
I could only, wait. wait. and wait. for a miracle.

The next thing I knew was they broke up. 
Reason? 
Rumours says that he only wanted her body, not her. 
Really?
HELL YEAH! seeing him touching her, flirting with those eyes that only attract a fisr from me.
THIS IS GREAT! not only great, THIS IS AWESOME!
She is free, I have my..... no, I dont have the guts to tell her about my feelings.
It continues. Our friendship continued. I was there wherever she is, whenever she needed me. Even when she dont, Im always there, right beside her.
For her, we are just good friends.
For me, must I not say the reason?

One day, I stopped talking to her, I just dont know why I did that stupid mistake. I tried to stop my addiction, my obsession of loving her, a one-sided impossible relationship.
It hurts, it bleeds.
Curiousity strucked her, she texted me, asking for a reaon, "Why are you avoiding me? Is there anything I did wrong? Please, would you talk to me? Yah you idiot! TALK TO ME!"
I never texted back.
She talked to me, but I acted cool and serious, giving her the face, ignoring her.
What was I thinking? This is something I always wanted, waited for years, and now? Im just giving it away like this?

You, Sooyoung, you BABO! You are a girl, forget about Jessica. You cant give her anything. You're just a friend to her, there's nothing more than that. 
If you confess, what's gonna change? She'll definitely be awkward around you.
You wouldn't stand a chonce of being close with her anymore.
IS THIS WHAT YOU WANTED?

"Sorry Sica, I should't have treated you like that. Would you forgive me?"
"It's okay Sooyoung-ah. I just dont want us to be uncomfortable with each other. So, are we okay?"
"Yes. As usual."

Was I doing the right thing? I never knew.

"I missed the times what we almost shared,
I miss the love that was almost there,
I miss the times that we use to kiss, at least in my dreams,
Just let me take the time and reminisce,
I miss the times that we never had,
What happened to us? 
We were almost there,
Whoever sait it's impossible to miss,
when you never had, never almost had you."

I love you Jessica, I really do... OH. FOOD!