Wrote this ages ago. Posted it here for the hell of it. Fluff, angst, slight . Just a ramble. Didn't think it good enough to be posted here, but it got a lot of notes on Tumblr. 

 The first time had been right after they’d won an award. Minho had managed to some how console everyone in the group who’d burst into tears, and then alone, Jonghyun had stumbled on Minho in the washroom, face covered in his hands.

Jonghyun remembered how he panicked, panicked and grabbed Minho and turned him around and had asked, repeatedly, what was wrong.

Minho had said nothing, but had pulled Jonghyun into the tightest hug he’d ever been in, and sobbed into his shoulder for some time, almost uncontrollably.

When Minho finally gathered his composure, he’d mumbled, “I’m so happy.”

Jonghyun had promised himself that the next time they won an award, he’d hug Minho.

And he would continue to do his best, to make sure they won time and time again – just so he could see the happy tears fall from Minho’s beautiful eyes.

Because Minho meant more than a lot of things to Jonghyun.

—-

The second time, Jonghyun never wanted to happen again.

It had been during their Lucifer comeback period, and Jonghyun had been annoyed. Not directly at Minho, he could never be directly mad at Minho, but he remembered the time like it was carved into his mind.

Jonghyun never regretted what he usually said, sometimes he felt bad, but he never actually regretted things. If Jonghyun ever thought about it, despite saying that he ‘regret’ what he did, he knew that if he went back to that moment and time, he would probably say it again.

The second time Minho cried, Jonghyun felt such a strong feeling of regret, tears had sprung to his own eyes.

“Sorry about this, you guys.” Minho had quietly mumbled, when they’d been in the living room after they returned home from practice. Minho had injured his leg, and no one blamedhim for the most part. It was an accident, accidents happened.

But Jonghyun had been so angry.

“Damn right you better be sorry,” Jonghyun remembered snapping, whipping around to face the younger boy. Minho had looked shocked and everyone in the room had widened their eyes. “You’re so stupid, and careless, mind you.”

He remembered the way Minho had flinched, eyes getting a little shiny, expression stunned.

And he’d gone on, like a maniac, like he’d been possessed, because he’d been so angry.

“You never think about us, do you? Just about yourself and that stupid Dream Team bull. Look what you’ve done – you went and got yourself hurt and who has to put up with it? Us?”

Minho’s expression had been on the verge of crumbling, and that still didn’t stop him. Jonghyun had felt like he could go on forever, because Minho wasn’t sorry enough.

He remembered, in that half hazard state of mind, wildly thinking that he had to make Minho cry, wanting Minho to cry and sob and apologize and-

“You never think about anyone but yourself, you always get so caught up in competition and you ruined what we’ve been working towards for so long-“

“Stop, Jonghyun,” Key had interrupted him in a soft voice, voice shaking a little.

Jonghyun hadn’t been grateful to the other boy at the time, simply peeved that he’d been cut off, but now  - now he owed Key so much for those two words.

And it had been at those words that Jonghyun let his gaze actually focus, not blindly glare at Minho.

The tears that had been previously welling up in those beautiful eyes, eyes that he really did adore, had spilled over, falling silently down Minho’s face.

Jonghyun remembered simply watching, lips going dry, mind going blank at what he’d done, and Taemin and Key had hurried to Minho’s side, hugging him and patting him on the back and whispering comforting things.

Onew had shot him a glare that clearly told him to leave, and Jonghyun had gone into the bedroom, feeling hollow almost.

Minho had entered the room not too long after, and without saying a word, had gone to his bed.

Jonghyun, feeling compelled to say something, said words he hadn’t even been thinking, but as soon as they left his mouth, knew they’d been true.

“Don’t ever get hurt again. Don’t ever get so caught up in competition that you endanger your safety.  Do you have any idea my feelings, my absolute concern, when they’d said you been hurt? How can you hurt yourself so much you have to wait so long to be able to dance? Don’t we mean more to you than that, than to do this? Don’t you care about me, who could’ve gone insane with worry when they told us you’d been injured?”

It was at that point Jonghyun’s voice had started to shake, and his eyes had started to burn.

“Don’t ever do that again, please, Minho.” He’d ended on a quiet note, softly, brushing away the tears before they’d slipped down his own cheek. “How could you do that to me…”

There had been a moment of silence, in which Jonghyun wondered if Minho had already fallen asleep.

“Sorry, hyung,” Minho had mumbled, and Jonghyun had found himself getting up, walking towards Minho’s bed and lying down on it, curling up next to the taller boy.

It was then that Jonghyun had promised himself he would never let Minho get hurt again. Or make Minho cry again, with words so careless, projecting what was actually anxiety and betrayal at Minho for having gotten hurt, into anger.

Because Jonghyun cared for Minho.

—-

The third time was a time that was forever engraved in his mind.

They’d been together for about six months or so, by that point, and Minho was always the one who topped, and thursting and filling Jonghyun completely.

Jonghyun had been curious, and after some , he’d brought up the topic of him topping. Minho had blinked, as if the thought had never crossed his mind, before proceeded to blush.

Jonghyun had known that by that point, if Minho simply blushed at the idea – he had to know how Minho would react if that actually did happen.

“Okay, hyung,” Minho had said in a soft voice, and Jonghyun remembered kissing him, forcefully.

The third time Minho had cried had been when Jonghyun pounded into Minho, losing his mind with bliss and forgetting that he was supposed to start off slowly.

Because it had been so good.

Minho had been so tight so inviting so warm, and Jonghyun couldn’t control himself.

It probably had only been about two minutes of pure bliss, until he realized that Minho was whimpering, softly crying.

Minho had been crying, whimpering, and Jonghyun had stopped completely, in utter shock of what he’d been doing.

He’d apologized softly, and started to pull out, when Minho had moaned, through his tears, in protest. Minho moaned and it hadn’t been the strong, forceful moan Minho gave when he was ing his full length into Jonghyun.

It had been a breathy, whimpering, pleading moan, through tears.

At the risk of sounding like a dominant sadist, Jonghyun had to say that he’d liked it. He loved it.

He loved hearing Minho beg, whimper, and even the tears that Minho had been crying from the obvious pain he was in, he’d loved it.

He’d loved it all so much, and the simple thought of Minho being under him, in pleasure through tears had been enough to get Jonghyun ing faster, pounder faster, mixing his own groans and moans and gasps into the mix until they reached a final together.

He’d apologized after, but Minho had silenced him with a kiss, staining his own face with the tears he’d cried, and Jonghyun had felt a slight nudge of guilt.

Of course, the guilt was nowhere near to how absolutely and utterly hot it was to have Minho cry out of pleasure and pain.

And Jonghyun hated it when Minho cried.

Because Jonghyun loved Minho. 

---

Yeah, sorry about that you guys.