CONTENT WARNING: characters asking to be killed, mentions of g*nocide. (BAMF!Wendy and poor Irene)

Four Witches sit in tense silence. One sniffling, eyes red and nose running. One glaring at the table like it had anything to do with the situation they’re in. Another leans against the wall beside the window, staring up at the menacing waning of the moon outside. The last one sits crumpled by the corner of the room, head between her knees and hands pulling on her own hair.

She’s first to break the silence. “She was in my dreams,” she says, grabbing the attention of the other three. “She was in my dreams. She… she’s the threat.”

The one by the wall scoffs. “Joohyun, we all know you’re at divination.”

Joohyun’s head snaps up and she shoots Sooyoung a glare. Except it’s far too much haunted and hurt to be intimidating. “I think the message was clear enough in my dreams. I wouldn’t risk it. Couldn’t. I don’t…” she sighs, rakes her fingers through her hair and avoids everyone’s eyes. “I don’t regret it,” she mutters softly, ashamed at the words that slip past her lips.

The one glaring at the table breathes in sharply, getting out of her chair. She hugs herself, facing the wall instead of her friends, her family. Her shoulders tense. “Of course you don’t.”

“You can’t blame me, Seulgi. I would never risk the town’s safety, and I still would not. I just won’t. Regardless of what I feel for Seungwan—” she cuts herself off, shakes her head. “This is bigger than any of us.”

“What did you see in your dreams?” Sooyoung asks, apparently the only one who’s willing to talk with Joohyun with a level head.

“Just… it was more of a feeling. Of intense betrayal and pain. And all I could see around us were flames. The whole town surrounded by flames.” When she looks up and finally meets gazes with the other three, her eyes are red rimmed and frightened. They all know what the flames mean, have been conditioned since young to be afraid of them. “There were bodies everywhere and no way out. And her—she was on the other side of the flames.”

“How did you know it was her?” Seulgi asks, still not facing her. For the first time since they’ve met, she doesn’t want to face Joohyun, doesn’t want to let Joohyun read her face and understand what it means. She doesn’t want Joohyun to know just how disappointed in her she is.

Joohyun shrugs, ignoring the aching deep within her chest. “All I saw was her smile. And it wasn’t… it wasn’t all that familiar when I first saw it in my dreams, but as soon as I saw her in Park Town, the flames and all the screaming and—I just knew. I couldn’t—I couldn’t save someone I knew would bring our downfall.” She hangs her head back, stares at the ceiling. "I thought it was Sunmi for sure at first. They have the same smile."

Silence fills the room, making it hard to breathe. Yerim sighs as she stands, dusting her pants nonchalantly like her breath isn’t coming out in uneven huffs. “Lot of help that brought, huh?” She looks around the room with new determination in her eyes. “I don’t for a moment believe Son Seungwan is capable of hurting us. I believed in her once, I’ll believe in her now.” She nods resolutely at them, at these three motherly figures in her life, the ones she’d save first when push comes to shove. Then turns her back against them. “We’ve had a long day. I suggest we catch up on rest.”

Sooyoung follows Yerim’s lead and pushes herself off the wall. “I am kind of tired.” She passes by Joohyun and grips her shoulders, looking her in the eye despite her confession. There’s hurt lurking in her beautiful eyes, hurt in behalf of Seungwan, but she doesn’t waver. “I’m sure the dream was real, and I understand where you’re coming from. But the future is never set in stone, Joohyun. Those who can bring us our death are capable of bringing us our peace.” She squeezes her shoulder and smiles a little, nothing more than a quick quirk of the corner of her lips, then breezes past and leaves the living room.

Seulgi’s still facing away as Joohyun drops down to the couch, rubbing at her face. “I’m sorry,” she says.

Seulgi stiffens. “I don’t think I’m the one who needs to hear that.”

“I don’t think she wants to hear it, actually,” Joohyun retorts with a pained laugh. “But I’m… I’m sorry.”

“You know as well as we do that if someone’s destined to do powerful things, good or bad, killing them while young doesn’t stop their destinies from unfolding.”

Joohyun flinches, turning her face away to hide the wince. “Yeah. Yeah, of course. I’m sorry.”

“You’ve ed up, Joohyun.”

“I know.”

“I understand where you were coming from, but you knew our policies. No killing. Absolutely none.”

“I know. I knew back then.”

“Then why did you do it?”

Joohyun scoffs. That’s the question isn’t it? That’s always the question. And there’s always just one answer. “I was scared.”

Seulgi sniffs. “Right.” She walks towards the door and if Joohyun was brave enough to look up, she’d see Seulgi staring at her with something that can only be described as sympathy. And understanding. And love, the love that never left her eyes. But Joohyun keeps her head down and Seulgi slips out the door without another word.

-

In the middle of the woods, surrounded by some of the safest arms she’s ever known, Seungwan is unknowing of the cracks she built between the once solid foundation of Peek A Brew. Seungwan, so blissfully unaware, shakes as fury, pain, and love fill her all at once, all the emotions she’s forgotten she’s supposed to feel after having her home burned down to ashes.

The memories aren’t there, not yet. There are flashes, sure, but nothing concrete. But the emotions flood in so easily, comes with the energy thrumming under her skin, the sudden knowledge of how to hold a bow or a gun or a sword and how to use them well enough to kill.

The emotions swallow her whole, has her gasping for air as unshed tears finally fall thickly down her cheeks. And everything burns. Seungwan grips Sunmi’s shirt, says sorry and I love you and thank you because Sunmi had lost her and she just now realized just how hard it must’ve been for her and she wasn’t there for her. So she hugs her and hopes she’s not years too late.

She grips Hyuna’s shoulders and whispers to her neck thank you, thank you, thank you and I remember how much I love you, how much I trust you because Hyuna’s been there for her sister all this time, has stayed up awake to keep Seungwan company when she has nightmares and filled Seungwan with the feeling of safety. She doesn’t remember Hyuna but she knows she should, knows Hyuna has stayed up late with her when they were younger with a promise to fight off the monsters under her bed and stayed until it’s time to fight off the monsters that live with them.

She pulls Soojung and Johnny into hugs and rambles I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry and I’m here, I’m still here for you because they know love and they know loss and when those two are mixed together, there is heartbreak that is so hard to forget. Because they probably pieced it all together in their heads, that Joohyun wouldn’t let anyone be left behind unless they pose a threat, and they’re still here and hugging Seungwan back and gripping at her like they’re scared she’ll disappear. Like so many of their families did before.

Seungwan finally pulls away, the emotions finally letting her breathe. She looks around and finds teary eyes and wet cheeks and words on their lips that don’t need to meet the air.

You’re not alone. You’re safe with us. We love you too.

-

Yuri huffs out a laugh when they tell her about Seungwan’s returned abilities, raises her drink in the air and digs her fingers in the sand. “Well, here’s to remembering.”

Several pairs of eyes stare back in bewilderment at the nonchalance. Then glasses clink together and Wheein and Hyejin flank Seungwan, arms around her.

“Here’s to remembering.” Hyejin pulls Seungwan close, lays her cheek against the top of Seungwan’s head. “And to never forgetting again.” It comes out a whisper, barely audible above the sound of waves crashing, but it’s like a bullet to Seungwan’s chest, has her gasping for breath at the intensity of needing and wanting to never forget again.

Wheein stares at Hyejin with stars in her eyes and stares at Seungwan with warmth in them. She smiles, kisses Seungwan’s cheek, then Hyejin’s forehead. “To never forgetting again. Nothing’s changed, Wan. It still would if you disappeared.”

“If any of you es disappeared,” Hyejin adds loudly with a laugh as Soojung throws a handful of sand at her.

Seungwan relishes in the safety of it all, in the way the water tickles her toes and Yuri’s rambling fills her ears with a satisfying hum, the alcohol filling her stomach with warmth.

The town is filled with monsters, filled with threats just looking for the right time to drive a dagger through their chests, but this… this is her safe space. Tucked behind a few rocks with memories written on them, the horizon promising tomorrows and yesterdays. Her closest friends surrounding her.

This is her safe space.

-

Heechul is crying when he knocks on the cabin door, now housing Johnny every time he’s not in Seungwan’s old apartment. The mansion is much too big and much too suffocating at the same time. Heechul’s shaking and fiddling with a handkerchief in his hands before his gaze lands on Soojung and he crumbles, trips over thin air and ends up with his face against Soojung’s neck, lips spilling apologies he doesn’t have to say. It isn’t his fault. Not at all.

But he’s grief stricken, scared, and tired. Hyuna makes him some tea and Johnny manages to pull him away from Soojung just long enough to give him one of his bone crushing hugs.

“I need your help. Please. No one else wants to listen and I’m—” Johnny silences him softly, running his hands through Heechul’s hair. “I’m scared we’ll end up in a timeline that’s not good.”

“We’re meeting up with Yuri and the others in an hour, you wanna come with us?” Soojung asks before chewing on her lip, eyes darting around and asking if she’s overstepped some boundary, let someone strange into their safe space. But she’s met with nods and loving stares. Heechul’s welcome. Anyone who feels they don’t belong anywhere else, anyone who’s homesick for some place they can’t reach, is welcome to join their mismatched group of brokenhearted.

Heechul looks up at her, his shoulders hunched and his fiery eyes barely lit. “Thanks. Thank you. Thank you.” He repeats those two words on and on and on until he falls asleep against Johnny’s shoulder, whimpering every now and then, his hands shooting up towards Soojung’s shirt and gripping.

He’s scared. So scared of losing his family. They all are. There are barely any space left in this town for other emotions aside from grief, loneliness, and fear, Seungwan realizes. But unlike Joohyun, he doesn’t look at Seungwan as a threat. He looks at her like a friend, with promises of protection and hugs. He looks at her like he knows something, and that something means Seungwan isn’t at all that bad.

Seungwan holds onto that look in Heechul’s eyes, despite telling herself she knows who she is and what her purpose is. She holds onto it to remind herself that she’s good, and whatever Joohyun saw in her, whatever it is that made Joohyun leave her, it’s nothing compared to the hope in Heechul’s eyes every time his gaze darts to Seungwan, as if to make sure she’s still there.

Seungwan would be lying if she told you it’s working.

-

Yuri hugs Heechul tight and from the few times Seungwan’s met Heechul, she’d say he’s not the clingy type, but his knuckles are white against the back of Yuri’s shirt and he has a hard time breathing as he dives for a hug from Sejeong, thanking her for letting him sleep at their place.

War brings out the most unexpected parts of people.

“What have you been up to, Heechul?” Yuri asks as she offers him a bottle of wine. This is all they have now, no space for wine glasses and shot glasses, for mixing up drinks. They drink straight from the bottle and pass it around.

Heechul slumps against a rock, the rock, staring wistfully at the writings. “I’ve been… getting as much help as I can on my own.”

“From who?”

Heechul’s gaze cuts to Johnny, his lips curled into grimace. “I—you’re not going to like this but I beg you to keep an open mind.”

“Sure.”

“From Park and Yang town. I’ve been housing the threats.”

Johnny’s cool bravado dissolves and is replaced by betrayal despite his easy reassurance to hear Heechul out. He glances at Yuri and finds her expression betraying nothing, then back at Heechul. “What?”

“They’re not… they’re not actual threats. I’ve—they’re just weapons.”

Jennie in a breath, looking away. She scoffs as she swipes the bottle of wine from Hyejin. “Yeah, they are. We were.” She looks up at Heechul, worrying her lip as she seemingly tries to muster up her courage. “Who… who from Yang town are here?”

Heechul shoots her a small, barely there smile. “Just Jinhwan. Yang doesn’t like sending his own men so it’s mostly from Park town.”

Jennie nods. “Is he okay?” she asks, lips brushing against the lip of the bottle as she ignores the looks sent her way. Are they all okay? she obviously wants to ask but doesn’t.

Heechul hears it. “He is. He says that the others are, too.”

“Are they… are they still trying to run away?”

“I—” There’s a brief flash of sadness and apology in Heechul’s eyes that has Jennie’s own eyes turning glassy. “I’m sorry. He said security has turned several notches up and it’s near impossible to do it now.”

“It’s okay.” And it does seem like it is, a smile playing on her lips and amusement in her eyes behind the longing and homesickness. “They’ll find a way. I know they will.”

Heechul nods. “They’re tough. And on the right side of the war. Or at least their hearts are.”

“I still can’t believe you’d keep this from us, Heechul.” Johnny doesn’t even try to mask the hurt in his tone, crossing his arms like a petulant child. “This is—we’re a family.”

It’s like a switch has been turned, the way Heechul completely changes. A snarl replaces his pout and anger fills his eyes. “Are we talking about the same family, John? The same family that’s so tense and scared that they kicked you and Yuri out for not listening to their boring meetings? The same family that kicked me out for trying to reason with them?”

Johnny lifts his shoulders in a pathetic shrug. “Still. Communication is key.”

“That’s bull,” Soojung snaps. Everyone shifts around uncomfortably. It’s the first time anyone actually yelled in this safe space and it’s quickly becoming clear that it won’t be the last. “Heechul tried to talk. You know, and saw, he did. But they dismissed his ideas without even a bat of their eyelashes. They don’t care. They’re too busy looking for ways to win the war against God Yang that they don’t care that it’s breaking the family apart.”

“We weren’t much of a family since Jinri left,” Yuri murmurs, finally breaking her quiet. When they look at her, she has her clasped hands against her lips, tears rolling down her cheeks like they belong there. She doesn’t try to wipe them away. “We weren’t much of a group since Sooyeon came out without her memories.” She takes a deep, shuddering breath. “We’re not much of anything together right now, Johnny. Especially not after Jisung.”

“But…” Johnny shudders, eyes turning distant. He blinks, looks away, and swallows painfully.

“Sure, we’d still take bullets for each other, but there’s not much of a connection, is there? And without connection, soon the bond will leave too.”

“I don’t think the Witches would take a bullet for me,” says Soojung quietly, like she’s not supposed to say it out loud. Her eyes cut to Seungwan but Seungwan’s expression is careful, doesn’t falter.

“I would.” Hyejin looks around at her tense friends, studying each face as if trying to remember, to memorize. The masks are off, the liquors can’t do much of anything against this much emotion. For once, they’re letting themselves feel. “I would for each one of you.” She smiles when Hyuna clamps a hand down her shoulder. “Even Heechul though I’d probably hesitate.” She winks cheekily, prodding a few quiet laughter to escape trembling lips.

Heechul grins good naturedly and god, Seungwan missed that look on his face. The mischief lighting up the fire in his eyes. “Thanks.”

Hyejin swats her hand in the air playfully. “So, uh, why are you getting help from the… threats?”

“The war is much bigger than we think.”

Soojung laughs, shaking her head. It’s not full of humor, it’s pained and insane and unbelieving. “Damn, just how ed are we if it’s much bigger than we think?”

“It’s… it’s against the humans. They’re the ones who’ll burn us all down,” Heechul admits with a wince, like it’s hard for him to say it out loud. Like he’s been keeping it within the cages of his ribs for far too long that it’s uncomfortable to let it out.

“The… humans.” Johnny’s brows knit in confusion, his lips parting but no words come out. “I… but they’re so fragile?”

“Watch it,” Seungwan bites back, slapping his arm.

He pouts apologetically. “You’re a Slayer, you don’t count as human.”

Seungwan barely manages to keep a shudder down, still not used to not being entirely human. She flashes Johnny a grin before he can backtrack and take his words back. He doesn’t need to feel guilty. “Still. Humans are scary.”

“I know. The president is human.” Sejeong shrugs with a little snarl and the others nod in acknowledgement, soft little smiles of amusement here and there.

Heechul’s eyes widen as if to say ‘see?’ but Jennie brushes him aside with a huff and a wave of her hand. “Still, they can’t possibly stand a chance against Supers. We’ve got superhuman abilities.”

“Yeah, but once the war between the clans end, we’d have too few numbers against humans.” Heechul’s eyes have hardened and his lips are set in a thin, straight line. “All they need is to trap us and set the place ablaze and we’re… gone.”

“Like what happened in Park Town.” Sunmi and Hyuna share a pained look. Sunmi sighs. “What happened with most other towns. And with Slayers on their side.” She makes a pathetic motion with her hands, throwing them around soundlessly before shrugging. “But they don’t know for sure that we exist.”

“Not yet. This happens in the future. This…”

The words that come out of his mouth has them all gasping, eyes wide and fearful. Has Hyejin and Wheein clinging onto each other and Johnny’s eyes filling with tears.

“This Super genocide.”

-

Yerim is as childlike and mischievous when she stumbles upon Seungwan in the woods, and Seungwan doesn’t have it in her to be mad at her. Not when Joohyun leaving Seungwan to die wasn’t her fault anyway.

“Hey,” Yerim greets cheerfully, grinning at Seungwan with her hands behind her back and her shoulders cheekily to her ears. “How ‘ya doin’?”

Seungwan can’t help but laugh and roll her eyes fondly. “Great. Got my abilities back.’

Yerim’s eyes widen comically, genuinely taken aback. “So that’s why you’re alive?”

“Guess so.”

“That’s cool. This never happened before.” Her mischief filled eyes fill with curiosity as she tilts her head and studies Seungwan’s form. “Can you shoot that deer by the clearing without looking?” She jerks her head towards the cluster of trees, leaves concealing the deer Seungwan can hear is walking through.

Seungwan nods. “I can, but I won’t. Soojung’s fond of the animals in the woods.”

“Of course she is, she’s Fae.” There’s fondness and proudness in her eyes that has Seungwan feeling warm on Soojung’s behalf. “How is she, by the way? And Johnny and Yuri and Heechul?”

There’s an aching in her voice. A longing. Seungwan struggles to tune it out, struggles to keep herself from feeling bad about things that are out of her hands. “They’re great,” she answers as truthfully as she can. She arrived in town far too late and has never really seen Yuri, Johnny, Heechul, and Soojung ‘great’. They were haunted before she even met them.

It seems to as least put Yerim’s worries at ease, her heart leaps when she finds the Witch smiling at her. Almost like she’s thankful. “That’s good.” She doesn’t say anything else and they stay there under the shade of a particularly big tree in silence.

Seungwan keeps a respectable distance between them. They never really had the chance to be that close. While Seulgi’s in her class and has the same tastes as her, and Sooyoung’s always staying up drinking with her, and Joohyun’s—well, that’s a whole ‘nother complicated relationship; Yerim had Saeron to talk to and only had quips to throw at Seungwan. They don’t have as deep a connection as Seungwan does—did—with the other three.

But Yerim has always believed in her. “I still believe in you,” she admits in a soft whisper, almost scared to break the serene of the woods. When she’s not too busy making sure the woods isn’t haunted by monsters trying to rip their town apart, she has time to appreciate the peace in it.

Seungwan nods, not really knowing what to do with what Yerim just confessed. Not really knowing what to do with the image of Yerim, crying her eyes out as she stared at Seungwan like she’s scared, when she was hit by the mist. Like she cares about Seungwan’s safety. It hurts her.

“Sooyoung does too. And Seulgi.”

Seungwan doesn’t ask ‘how about Joohyun?’ because they both know the answer to that. They both know Joohyun won’t risk it. She’d try to keep both sides safe but will pick the town over Seungwan any time.

(Seungwan would pick the town over herself, but no one asks her about that. They just assume she’ll care for herself more.)

“Joohyun wants to talk to you.”

That’s unexpected. Seungwan doesn’t look at Yerim, though, barely even stiffens. Her abilities coming back means she also got the calm exterior of a Slayer, the one that’s not afraid of being prey and instead pretends to be predator. She tilts her head to the side. “Really?”

“I suspect she wants to apologize. Explain her side.”

“No matter her explanation, she left a child to die when she was supposed to be saving them.” Seungwan shrugs, rolls her shoulders and relishes in the soft pain of her muscles tightening. “No matter her explanation, she ruined not only my life, but also my sister’s.”

“Yeah.” Yerim sighs, and Seungwan can’t see her but she thinks she’s for sure frowning. “Yeah, I know. And you owe her nothing, but she’s—she’s miserable.”

“I don’t care.”

“And you shouldn’t.” A quiver escapes her lips, makes its way to her words. Yerim in a breath. “You shouldn’t, but I do. And I’m… I’m not forcing you at all, but I just really want to try to ease some of her pain off. And to ask what it would take for you to accept her apology.”

“I appreciate that you’re looking out for her, Yeri, but I really don’t give a .” Which is, of course, a lie. Her heart hurts just thinking about Joohyun hurting over this. Her treacherous heart. But it comes out sharp and wanting to inflict pain. “I don’t think anything you say or do will ever convince me to listen to her apologies.”

They’re quiet again for a moment, but the peace is gone and replaced by words struggling to get out. I want to forgive her, Seungwan wants to say. I’ll force you if I have to, she sort of wants Yerim to say, wants to hear the childish determination in her voice.

“If you hear her explanation, at least it’ll clear up some questions for you,” is what Yerim says instead.

Seungwan sighs. It’d be an even bigger lie if she said she wasn’t interested in knowing why Joohyun left her to die. A logical part of her knows it means something horrible about her future, knows about Witches and futures and books in the town library having excerpts from timelines that have reached the future. If Joohyun wanted to leave a little child to die, that can only mean that little child would be unstoppable if left to grow up.

But Seungwan finds herself nodding, accepting the fact that she’ll be hurt no matter what she decides. And Yerim beams at her, moves to hug but decides against it just before her fingertips brush against Seungwan’s shoulders, a sheepish pull on her lips and she slowly draws her hands back. She says I’ll tell Joohyun. And we can tell Johnny where to meet, or you can tell Johnny. It doesn’t matter. We’ll have both groups nearby but out of earshot so you can have your privacy and your safety. Not that we would ever do anything to you, of course, or that we think you’ll do anything to Joohyun—

And Seungwan tunes her out, shaking her head if only to hide the amused smile threatening to lift her lips, and stands. She leaves Yerim there, still rambling and almost yelling as she walks away, and pulls her own arms against her own body to fight off the cold.

She wishes Yerim had gone for the hug instead, but brushes that thought aside as soon as she arrives at the clearing where their cabin is and finds Yuri and Hyuna geeking over seashells and Johnny and Soojung throwing pebbles at each other while the other isn’t looking and Heechul and Sunmi manning the barbeque grill they’ve set up.

This is her safe space, it’s a risk to let others in.

-

It takes a little argument before Sunmi allows Seungwan to meet up with Joohyun, and the older Son glares at Joohyun threateningly as soon as they meet up behind Peek A Brew, hands on the hilt of her sword.

Seungwan rolls her eyes and swats her away before her gaze meets Joohyun’s and she finds herself having a hard time breathing. The pain in there, the remorse and the absolute anguish. She looks away before the tears prick her eyes and walks beside Jennie towards the place they decided to talk.

It’s far enough from both their cabin and Peek A Brew to be neither’s territory and Seungwan’s friends inspect every corner to look for traps before they give her a hug each and walk over to the side, waiting for the Witches to leave with them. Seulgi looks away as soon as she meets Seungwan’s eyes, her lashes glistening. Sooyoung nods at her, a quiet act of support. And Yerim grins, shoots her a thumbs up, and does a good job of hiding the tremble of her lips when Seungwan doesn’t react.

Joohyun stays a few feet away from Seungwan, playing with her fingers despite the amusingly impressive unbothered façade in her expression. Seungwan doesn’t start the conversation, lets Joohyun set the pace, and leans against a tree.

“I’m sorry,” Joohyun finally blurts after a few minutes of intense quiet.

Seungwan quirks a brow. “Not accepted.”

Joohyun winces, looks away. But she quickly gains confidence again and meets Seungwan’s eyes. “You have to understand, Seungwan, every instinct buried deep within me was screaming at me, shaking me away from my trance and telling me to—” she gasps, blinking back tears.

Seungwan stares at her unwaveringly. “Telling you to kill me? A child.”

Joohyun sighs and nods, looking away for a moment, for a breath, before looking back. It’s like she can’t keep staring back at Seungwan for more than a few moments at a time or it’ll all be too much for her. “I wouldn’t do anything to risk my family’s safety, Seungwan. I’d quickly throw myself off a cliff if I ever find out I’m the threat.”

Seungwan nods, standing up straighter. She takes a gun from her hip and throws it to Joohyun’s feet. Joohyun jumps back and the gun barely brushes against the toes of her shoe. “Do you regret it?”

Joohyun’s gaze snaps up from the gun. “I—” and Seungwan knows the answer. Even if she didn’t hesitate. Even if she lies without hesitation. Seungwan knows the answer. But she wants Joohyun to say it, wants Joohyun to break her heart and tell her she doesn’t regret it. Wants her to admit it, wants to see Joohyun’s expression crumple into one of pain.

“I don’t.”

But something must’ve went wrong because while Joohyun’s eyes fill with desperate torment, Seungwan’s heart pricks along with it. The nightmares are screaming somewhere at the back of her mind and Seungwan has to force herself to remember how to breathe. She her chin towards the gun. “Do it, then. Finish your job.”

“What?” Joohyun breathes out, stepping back and holding her hand to her stomach. Her brows are furrowed and her lips parted, eyes terrified. “I can’t—I won’t—”

“I’m still a threat, Joohyun. Your weird prophetic powers told you that, didn’t they? Finish me off right now.” She raises her hands up in surrender and a tear slides from Joohyun’s eye. “I won’t fight back. Sunmi can’t find me before I bleed to death. Now’s your chance, Joohyun.”

“Please.” Joohyun gasps, shaking hand clamps to as she takes another step back. Like this is all a test when it’s all just Seungwan poorly concealing her own fears. “Please, Seungwan, I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”

Seungwan stares at her, watches as Joohyun’s gaze darts around, looks for a way to call out to the others before anything bad can happen. Watches as desperation fills her eyes and she takes another step back from the gun, has her back against a tree now.

With a scoff, Seungwan takes another gun from the holsters on her hip. She takes the safety off, puts her finger on the trigger, and watches with morbid satisfaction as Joohyun’s eyes widen in fear, the gun pointed to just under Seungwan’s chin. She grins, her fears pulling painfully at her lips and making her smile feel like a stranger forcing its way to her own home. “Come on, Joohyun. Shoot me or I’ll shoot myself.”

A strangled sob escapes Joohyun as she takes several steps forward, hands outstretched but not touching Seungwan, stepping over the gun on the ground. “Don’t—don’t—Seungwan—I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry I ever hurt you. I’m really sorry.”

“You don’t get it, do you, Joohyun? You can hurt me all you want. You can destroy me. I let you shoot me in the laser tag arena after you kissed me and I really wouldn’t care if you did it with a real gun. I love you.” They both take a breath at that, both suddenly still and rigid. Seungwan’s next words come out raggedly. “But that was before I knew my sister. Before I knew she was still the hero I knew from when I was younger. I—Joohyun, I don’t care much for my own safety as long as it’s your hand pulling the trigger, but I can’t bear to look my sister’s heartache in the eyes after barely managing to stay alive.”

“I’m sorry.” It’s a prayer at this point, the apologies pouring out of Joohyun’s mouth.

“If you wanted to have me dead, you should’ve made sure I stayed dead. Because years later, my sister’s still hurting and now I’ve got all these other people who’ll hurt if I’m hurt, both those I don’t remember and those I just met.” She takes a step towards Joohyun, presses the barrel of the gun harder against her jaw. “Do you know what it’s like, Joohyun? To only have friends who are either from a past you can’t remember or from a future you’re apparently destined to destroy?”

“I’m sorry.”

“And I can’t let myself be the one who hurts them, Joohyun.”

Joohyun’s eyes widen in realization, hands that are clasped together in a prayer freezing. “What?”

“I’m the threat. Kill me.”

“No.”

Seungwan takes a step forward and smiles, her eyes shining with mirth. “It’ll just be like laser tag. You kiss me and then shoot me.”

Joohyun’s face falls and it takes an ungodly amount of willpower not to look away. “Please. Please, Seungwan, I’m sorry.”

“Joohyun, if you kill me now, we’ll both be getting what we want. You’ll be protecting your town and I won’t have to look at my sister’s pain.”

“She’ll still be in pain, Seungwan.” Joohyun stands, suddenly regaining confidence. She glares at Seungwan, pain in eyes her replaced by anger. “She’ll still be in pain and she won’t be the only one.”

“I won’t have to see it. And you’ll keep your town safe,” she repeats, mostly to herself. To remind herself what a monster she’ll be.

“Why are you doing this, Seungwan?”

That’s a whole can of worms Seungwan can’t answer so she steers the conversation. “You know what I think, Joohyun?” She doesn’t wait for an answer. “I think you’re a coward. It was so much easier for you to hurt me when you didn’t know me. And I know you thought of me as the threat since the start so why can’t you get back that determination to eliminate me, Joohyun? Why can’t you do it?”

“Because I care for you.” The words haunt the air, coiling around Seungwan’s throat coldly.

She scoffs, rolling her eyes. They’re wet, funnily enough, and there’s a lump in when she swallows. “Do you care more for me or the town?”

“I don’t—”

“You can’t have it both ways, Joohyun. You have to pick.”

“I can’t.”

“You have to pick, Joohyun.”

“No.”

“God damn it, Irene, pick!”

Joohyun backs away, stung. But Seungwan’s glare doesn’t falter. “I don’t want to.”

“You’re a goddamn liar.” At Joohyun shooting her a look between affronted and confused, she laughs. “You’ve made your decision. You just can’t say it out loud. In the near future, you’ll have to do it. You’ll kill me for the town’s safety.”

Joohyun’s lips curl, a retort drying on her tongue. They both know it’s true. It’s the town over Seungwan. Seungwan watches as the woman she swears she loves falls to her knees, eyes red as tears pour like rainfall from them, lips twisted into a pained whimper. She watches as she breaks down into a thousand pieces, eyes haunted and terrified and grieving. She watches as Joohyun’s mouth moves, the words not registering in her mind. It’s probably just apologies. Once she cannot bear to hear.

She watches and sighs, throws the gun without clicking the safety back on and barely flinching as it accidentally shoots, the bullet digging itself against a tree. She listens with her super hearing as their friends nearby jump to action and race towards them.

Joohyun’s still on the ground, looking up at her with pained, pained eyes. Seungwan can’t find herself feeling satisfied over it, over the pain she’s inflicting on Joohyun. She shakes her head and runs the other way before the others can get into the clearing, her name dying on Joohyun’s lips.

She runs and runs and runs, ignoring the lack of footsteps running after her. She runs and runs and runs, ignoring the trail of tears that’ll bring the others to her when they decide to follow her. She runs and runs and runs, ignoring the constricting of her chest that has nothing to do with her running and more to do with her heart breaking. She runs and runs and runs, ignoring the looks sent her way by wandering people, concerned gazes from people who know her.

She runs and runs and runs and fails to ignore all these things. No matter how many times she slaps her own head, pulls her own hair, breaks the skin of her palm from clenching her fists to tight. It’s there, the reminder that she’s hurt people and people have hurt her and the cycle won’t ever end until one side dies.

She finds herself inside a cave by the beach, one that’s not accessible unless you swim a few minutes through the sea. One that’s not accessible unless you have less need for breathing underwater like Slayers and Mermaids and Sirens do. Like Monsters.

She cries herself to sleep, burrows deeper into the cave whenever the Mermaids and Sirens swim past. This is a whole new level of broken, one she's not sure she'll ever recover from. Her palms heal and her feet don't even hurt but her healing abilities don't know how to stitch her broken heart together again.

Horribly, she misses the numbness that comes with forgetting.

A/N:

surprise , i bet you thought you'd seen the last of me.

title from paper crown by alec benjamin

thepurplewan