Chapter 2
Loving partner

I'm going to the place where love...
The feeling you got don't ever cost a thing...

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"C--" I trailed off as I never expected him to pick me up so early.

"C'mon now, hon. You still have to rest for our wedding tomorrow," he said as he gently pulled my hand up to make me stand. His eyes are rather pleading. It's like he can feel the same misery that I'm feeling by the time. Sure he can. But it's for some other reasons...

"Calvin..."

His eyes searched my own - staring in each of them like he's reading his favourite novel - never leaving any word misread. He's always been there to support me after what had happened. He's caring; even more caring than Chun. I don't know why but despite what Chun did to me, I still consider him as my precious saviour -leaving without giving you any single reasonable reason for you to hold on to. If you think that I'm being sarcastic, well I'm not.

He left without even asking me to wait for him. Yet, I still did. I waited for him for seven years. Seven long, enduring years.

But even his shadow seemed to disappear completely from this Earth.

"Ella..."

His soothing hands dropped themselves to my flexed shoulders in the lightest manner he can muster. He knew better than to hurt me. In fact, it's the thing that I'm afraid of. He's not even capable of hurting me. And that's the time when I realized that a relationship is incomplete without any pang of pain to suffice the ingredients. And to establish equilibrium, I think my fate did it's duty to produce homeostasis. We both know that after the ceremony that will unite us as one, we're going to suffer the bitterness of mortality that will separate us forever. At least, physically - because even until now, we're already separated emotionally. And I admit, I'm the one who untied that knot he tried to build for years.

"Okay," I said. He assissted me to walk after shielding me with his jacket. I looked at him. He seemed happy. I wonder how he can even smile although he knows that after tomorrow, everything he worked so hard to get will vanish from his life forever. I wonder why God gave me a perfect man to couple with my imperfections. I have but approximately twenty-four hours to figure out the answers to my questions.

And I don't think a single day will be enough.

~

...and the pain you feel is a different kind of pain

~

"How can you..." she spoke after a long silence. Her gaze fixed on me.

I can feel her hesitation to ask me about it. Don't get me wrong. The "it" that I stated is a mystery to me too. And believe it or not, I'm also eager; so eager to know what has been lingering in her mind for a while now. And I bet you wonder why I'm not even asking, right? It doesn't mean that I don't care. It's just that I respect her so much. And for that reason, I knew better than to put any more pressure on her shoulders for the sorrows that are laid there are way too much for her already.

I lowered my head slightly and raised my brow a little as I encouraged her to continue through my simple gesture.

I sighed mentally as I sensed that she's going to open up. But even so, if she's not, I won't bother anymore. I better keep my hunches and worries to myself than to pry on her. It will be very unlike me.

She looked away; clearly reluctant to continue. I saw her gulp her own insecurity and convinced her own self to say something as she look at me once again.

"How can you manage to... smile...?"

I know what she meant by that statement. How can I smile although I know that she's dying? I gulped. The last word hit me hardly that I can't even manage to recompose myself. It doesn't mean that I'm happy just because I'm smiling. Behind that smile dwells my agony. I don't want to let her go... but there's nothing I can do about it. No one can...

"Do you know that the most common mask people unconsciously wear is a smile?" I asked her with another question. My face is soft with all the concern for her but I'm trying my best to stay strong. Believe me...

The first time I met her was in the hospital I'm working at. Yes. I'm a doctor. And I've been her doctor at that time. That was the first time that I laid my eyes on a woman again after Angela, my ex-girlfriend, broke-up with me. I know that she's weak yet I admired her fighting spirit. Her will to live despite the hardship brought to her by her illness. That's the courage I've never had. She thought me how to be strong and now, I'm trying to be strong for her. This is the least I can do for her. And the best is to give her my never-ending love regardless of her condition.

"Thank you for everything..." she uttered. Tears are already threatening to fall in the corner of her eyes. I reached out for her and wiped her tears with my thumb gently. I kissed her forehead after I rested my right hand on hers. I squeezed her fragile hand gently to reassure her. There's no turning back now. I'm going to fight with her in this battle.

That's how much I love her.

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Hi my lovable readers and friends! I posted again but I feel like no one is reading this story... please lighten me up by commenting... thanks..