I’m happy knowin’ that you are mine
The grass is greener in the other side
The more I think the more I wish
that we could lay here for hours and just reminisce
On the good, the bad, the ugly
the smiles, the laughs, the funny
Oh, the things we put each other through
It’s for you

– Happy (Never Shout Never)

***

The day when winter is not that cold finally is coming. My super busy fiancée is off schedule and got two free days as a reward after he made an exquisite works at the hotel he works as executive chef. He told me how the hotel owner praised him on his idea to serve traditional fusion food as Christmas treat. Beyond any expectation, many families around the world stayed at that hotel enjoyed their visit and gave extra attention to the meals preference.

And I’m way more proud, if it’s not jubilant, when he called last Sunday that he would be able to do our regular movie marathon with some snippets of dishes he chiefly prepared for the upcoming Christmas supper with my family. Pre-tasting he said.

“I must have done some good deeds.”

“Why is it so?”

“Take a look at this. It’s Tuesday, I got no schedule until next Friday and you got breaks, the movie is ready and something’s progressing on the kitchen!”

Kibum walks to the living room with a basket full of neatly chopped fruits, drops it on the bench, before flops his next to me on the couch, “Hmm. You must have skipped two PMS session two times in a row, that’s why we got such a prize.”

A lovely slap precisely landed on his tummy followed by adorable grimace on his pale face, “I’ll make sure the next one is including your sore ears and tears dealt with the Maleficent.”

“Nope, thank you!” he said as if shiver started crawling under his skin imagined how it would be a major disaster, “What we got here?”

The piles of DVDs moved in a speed of lights to my hand, head on his chest, I lifted my hand a bit higher so he could easily choose over my head, “We got Vantage Point, Ever After, Bolt, Tangled, Sweeney Todd, Willy Wonka, Catching Fire, Star Trek, and How To Train Your Dragon One and Two.”

“What an odd combination. I love Ever After, though.”

“Yeah. The only stuffs left after Taemin and Jonghyun cruelly robbed this unit with their lost and found personality.”

“Dammit, I wouldn’t let Jonghyun and his filthy hand intruding our apartment again! Put the movie, I’ll go get the nachos and hummus and check the Moroccan Chicken to feed the little monster inside your tummy!”

I am so ready to pitch him a bundle of cuss but he cut me right away with a kiss on my right cheeks. Forced to get up since my arm pillow needs to stir pot on the stove, I walked to the DVR reluctantly, “Remind me to kick your sassy some other time.”

“You love me because my sharp tongue, right, honey?”

“You wish! If only that tongue works as magnificently as when it curse during make out!”

“Are you sure? You can lie but not your body, hon!”

“Funny how you said!”

“Need some proofs?”

Firm arms wrapped me from the back all of sudden. Back facing his direction gave him some advantages to sneak in behind me and pressed his vivacious breath right on my neck. My oversized worn out t-shirt is no help either when he gave me a soft kiss on my shoulder. I turned my body just to find this devilish smirk all over his face which I can’t help but laughing at it so hard. Both my hands automatically parked behind his neck when he trailed down his long fingers to my waist.

“Just show me how it works and… maybe we can verify later..”

Kibum cuts the distance by pressing his pinkish lips on mine and swiftly I forget that we’re in the middle of winter because my heart burnt inside my chest and some explosions of fireworks claimed my sight. Four years together and this man before me has never disappointing in the matter of affection. The soothing touch of fingertips graced my back, in rhythm with passionate movement on my lips. Right when he trailed down my jaw, the door banging furiously.

“Who’s punching on the door like that in a fine morning?” feeling interrupted, Kibum stretched his neck away.

Having separated more than three weeks, I feel the urge to straddle him on the spot as I cupped his face to focus on his task, “I don’t care..” the kiss continue onto something deeper despite the louder chanting from the door.

He pulled away and gave a soft peck on my nose, “We can always verify later, honey. Go check that insolent moron on the door! I need to check the chicken, anyway.”

No need to argue more because he stepped back after ruffled my hair and gave a right smack on my butts seeing my unmoved feet. I stomped as I sprint to the front, ready to yell to whoever behind, but..

“Hi, sweetheart!”

“What are you doing here?” Siwon’s standing with his wide joker smile, his little daughter standing beside him, a small pink suitcase in her left hand and big monkey dolls in her right hand, “Hi, baby! Kibum-ah, your favorite princess is here!”

“Zooey, get inside first, I need to talk to your Aunty. Go see your prince!” Siwon tapped his daughter shoulder and she ran inside in one cue.

“What was that? Are you supposed to be somewhere across the horizon?”

“Exactly. I’m here because I know you are the best sister in the world.”

“Ugh, you keep that smile of yours away and reveal your identity.”

“My business meeting is re-scheduled.”

“Oh no.”

“Oh, yes. Her mother is still in Hawaii for global warming conference and get back here tomorrow morning which initially I would pick her up and take turn watching over her.”

“But you got your meeting..”

“.. re-scheduled. Please, baby. You’re my only chance.”

“Why don't you disturb Minho?! This is our free day after almost a––“

“He attended a soccer winter camp, remember?”

Yeah, I remember now, since he broke up with his last girlfriend, me myself help him packing up all those necessities including two thick blanket and a comforter, my brother is such a baby. Two of them.

My mouth zipped in instant before it could reopen up when I see Siwon eyes broken more than ever. This one had to be super important meeting because my brother would never exchange a quality time with his only daughter for anything. The look he gave me already told everything. Lord mercy me for such being a weak person.

“When will she get picked up?”

In a second, his eyebrows shot up if it's not almost ripped his forehead then my limb got wrapped by super strong Choi family arms, “You are my savior honey! Karma will give you what you deserve!”

“I thought our family supposed to be devoted Christian like you always brag?”

“I need more than one God to repay you! I'll bring you and Kibum new Docs or Wang coats or anything both of you want for Christmas just call me.”

“Just go before I changed my mind!”

“Tell my princess to be nice. Sent Kibum my apologize and lots of grateful. See you soon!”

Before I could yell him off, his board shoulder already disappeared. I close the door and cursed myself for being the typical easy last child.

Back in the living room, Kibum and my niece happily held a colorful plastic dinner party. His head lifted up and quizzical look adorns his face which meet up my bitten lips.

“Before anything else, I am soooo sorry for ruining our day. You can kill me or torture me until my last breath but please don't leave me and canceling the engagement for some ridiculous bimbos.”

Yes, I'd rather die than seeing the love of my life holding someone else's hand. And yes, I am this cheesy hopeless romantic human being.

“Prince Kibum, are you gonna kill my aunty?”

Kibum laughter filled the air before I could swallow my niece statement, “Of course not, Princess. We love her too much right?” He pats her head to tell her back to the barbie, “Baby, what are you talking about?”

Another sigh let out, “Kitchen, please.”

Kibum entails me after sit the Daisy Duck dolls in his hand.

“We need a new plan,” I leaned my side to the fridge when Kibum saved from my niece's sight.

“Why is that so?”

“She's gonna stay with us at least until tonight. Siwon got a sudden change on his meeting schedule and his wife maybe just finished check in for her flight back home. Her second favorite dad had a winter camp so he's out of reach. Siwon promised us new boots or Wang's new outer. Is that okay?”

“And you scared your niece with my imagination murder plan? Unbelievable!”

“That means––“

“That means I'm alright. Super fine.”

“Seriously?! Since when you've been this kind?” I jokingly punched his tummy and Kibum just rolled his eyes.

“Since Jinki moved to our kitchen. His patience is beyond infinity. I feel bad if I got mad by such a tiny matter.”

“I though he had this condition you want to avoid like you've always talked about.”

“Well yeah, glad I got influenced with the good one.”

His cheeks as flawless as it looks when I caress it. A delicate which almost convinced you that fairy is real, “I feel so bad ruining our day off.”

“It's okay. We still got another day to spend tomorrow.”

“Is this because of the coat and boots I mention before?”

“Of course. Siwon better keeps his words or I flee myself and drag his guts right away back home.”

“Aaaand.. my man is back. Don't worry I'll be the first to volunteer myself with the honor of beating him up.”

***

“Zooey, your lunch is ready. Come here, honey!”

Small feet run happily to the feast we prepared earlier, “What we eat today?”

“I have chicken rice for you and... Taraaaa! Flower sausages for the prettiest princess!”

“Prettier than aunty?”

My belly hurts hearing such a question and when I pull the chair beside her I still try to contain myself, “Of course, Sweetheart! You're a princess and a princess should be the prettiest among all.”

Zooey smiles and starts digging her meals, her puffy cheeks turned cuter multiple times and when finally I struck my eyes with Kibum he mouthed something in silence.

'You are prettier.'

Which I can't help but doing the same action, 'I know.'

He smirks and let it go with helping the little girl who struggles with her spoon. The phone's ring cut off my daydreaming.

“I got it,” Kibum ran to the impatience sound and wrapped the receiver with his chest five seconds after, “For dr._______ from the clinic.”

“I thought I made it clear that I'm off schedule until Friday.”

He shrugs his shoulder, “Just take it. She sounds horrified.”

Please don't make it worst, I just had enough surprise today and no room for any bad news.

“_______'s speaking!”

“What?! Impossible, it supposed to be next Sunday.”

“I can't. Try calling Jonghyun, he's in charge I guess. Make sure it's not false alarm.”

“Any problem?”

“Nope. A little misunderstanding. Let's finish our lunch and get the movie ready before nap.”

“But I want to draw butterflies and Tinkerbell and princess and minions with prince Kibum, Aunty.”

Zooey interrupts with sausage almost fell from which I can only smile and wiped it, “Honey, Tinkerbell said she wants to see you at the dreamland first so she could tell you what kind of dress she should drawn with.”

“And the minions too?”

“And the minions too.”

“Pinky promise?”

“Pinky promise! Now finish it and change your clothes because the movie can't wait!”

***

One of the greatest thing I feel so blessed is the fact that Kibum loves kids as much as they love him. Like a magnet, he attracts so many little hugs around him and in one snap, those little angels fell for him. Of course my niece is one of them. Once Kibum on sight, she would forget about her drop dead gorgeous dad who she's always clinging on to. And for my brother, that's a big prize so he could spend more his time with his equal busy wife. Which poles apart with Minho who sees him as a competitor.

“Honey, it's from the clinic again,” Wait, I didn't hear any ring from th––, “Your phone is a mess pick it up quickly!”

Don't tell me Jonghyun can't handle that beagle.

“Doctor, you need to be here right now!” The panic voice of the new girl on the front desk greets me once I got a hold on my phone.

“Where's Doctor Jonghyun?!”

“He went to Mr. Kim farm house. One of the cow is in labor.”

“And Doctor Shin?”

“He's in–– OH MY GOD, SIR!! What are you doing?!”

“Doctor _______! Are you there?! Help me!”

It’s Mr. Lee crying on the other line. What kind of horror is this?!

“Yes, Mr. Lee. I’m here.”

“Oh, thanks God!! My baby can't breath what should I do?! I'm worried about her babies!! Oh, my Lord! She's dying! They're dying!! She needs section to help them!”

“Calm down Mr. Lee, I can't help you if you're panicking!”

“You need to be here!! She needs help!! I need your help!!!”

“Can't do, Mr. Lee. It’s my day off and it's normal for seven years old beagle looks awful near her labor day. As I said last week, her schedule is supposed to be next Sunday and we agreed to bring her back to the clinic on Saturday to prepare her section.”

“It’s different! I’ve seen her pregnant twice before and she's not as weak as right now, Doctor _______, please you need to check her I need you now, we need you!”

“Mr. Lee, just like human, dog can had a false alarm too. Maybe since this time she carries three in a row. She will be fine! It's just because–– OH MY!”

The phone must be dragged to the said dog and yes it’s not supposed to be like that and she sounds really dreadful. Is she really dying?! No way, not a chance!

“Heard that?! What if she got heart attack and lost her babies?!”

“I guarantee you she will be fine. Now, can I talk to Ms. Leah? Please, Mr. Lee.”

The said man sounds as bad as his dog, “Yes, Doctor _______? I'm sorry for disturbing you.”

“It’s okay, we can't help at all when it came to Mr. Lee. Put the dog in early. Give her number two and check for the heart rates every half hour. Tell him that his dog need to stay. Move Ms Jossie cat to his cage and use the room for the beagle. Text me the updates, I’ll check it on Thursday.”

A strong gaze came from across the couch and I found Kibum’s eyes locked on me, “Why are you so judging me?”

“I’m not judging you,” he moved the tea table aside so he can spread the comforter, “What happened with Mr. Lee?”

“Panicking. Like when Garçon accidentally swallowed cheese.”

“Half block, honey! Half block of cheese for Pete’s sake! Everyone would be panic if they were me! And it stuck on his throat! He couldn't breath it was so devastating!”

A picture of Lady Monroe – Mr. Lee dog’s name, yes, he’s that obsessive in classic era proved by the other dogs: Mr Presley, a pomsky and Miss Hepburn, a chihuahua – struggles with its own breath flashed trough my mind. Gosh, am I that selfish?

“_______?” That blurred image shattered when Kibum poked my arms, “Did you just zone out?”

“No, I didn't.”

“Then why did you clutch Zooey's bag that hard and not answering me?”

“You called me?”

“Two times. What the heck?! What happened at the clinic?”

“Nothing, just a panic patient. No, more like panic owner who's too much worry about his old beagle which about to push out three little fluffs.”

“What?!”

“What?”

“And you abandoned it just like that?!”

“I’m not abandoning anything! She’s supposed to go into labor this Sunday. But today she’s suddenly out breath.. Oh, my God! She’s out of breath! And those tiny babies inside her, maybe they shut its mother lungs down? ! What have I done?! I’m killing Lady Monroe oh, crap! Where’s my phone, honey? I’m a bad person, ain’t I? Gosh, just kill me! Oh, my God!!!”

When my lost hands searching for my neglected phone frantically, two firm hands take a good grip of my shoulder and force my tears soaked face to its own face.

“Baby, you need to calm down.”

“Nooooo, Jonghyun.. Where's Jonghyun?!” I scroll down contacts to find his number.

“Honey, you need to go. She needs you,” Kibum hands move to cup my face when a hold on my shoulder is no use.

“And let you down twice?! No ing way!”

“For Lagerfeld’s sake! Why are you so stubborn?! Listen!! Imagine that disaster happened to Comme Des. Or Garçon! Would you let it go just to be with me?!” Kibum shook not only my head but also my common sense, “I date you because you’re way more kind soul and nice and motherly and every single great thing I could mention about your vet attitude than me. If I wish I could help that poor dog, I believe you and your saint heart would do better than that! Than being this selfish! I wouldn't happy at all if I know I throw away a life just because its doctor chose to satisfy her fiancé!”

“You wouldn't mad?”

“I would go to the kitchen and grab the nearest knife to stab you in the eye if you don’t start running to that freakin’ clinic!”

There’s nothing I can do but hug the man before me so tight and pulled right away just for tip-toeing and kiss  him quickly.

“I love you so much!”

The next second I found myself wiping my drenched face and running for my bag. No time to change, so I just snatch Kibum's coat which happened to be placed on the dinning chair.

“Take Zooey for a nap after the movie.”

“I will.”

“I mean it! Save the drawing class after!”

“Yes, Ma’am.”

“And don’t forget to make the banana smoothies for her.”

“I won’t. Just go,” Kibum pushed me to the front door.

“Are you two will be alright?!”

“I love her and vice versa, what worst could be happened?! I’m a professional chef! I can handle this.”

“I’m so sorry, honey! I will make it up to you! I'll ask Siwon what time she’d pick her up.”

“I’ll call Siwon. I have his number, just go, for God’s sake!”

“This is beyond my control, I’m so sorry!”

“I know, I know. Stop saying sorry, you sounds like a new clumsy intern chef.”

“I’m sorry. Once I'm done with Lady Monroe, I’ll be back right away. I’ll buy that che––“

Pair of soft lips locked mine forced me to swallow back my words. His hand my hair while the other secure its place on my cheek. He pulled away and I reach his lips again for a quick peck before take the car keys in his hand.

“I love you so much, Kim Kibum.”

“So do I, _______.”

“I’ll be back soon. Be good with Zooey.”

“Don’t worry, we’re good! Go! Save a life for me, baby girl!”

***

“Baby, I’m home!”

Kim Kibum seems keeping his promise to put my baby niece to afternoon nap because no footsteps running around the house as it’s as peaceful as morning brew. Discard my coat, my eyes stumbled onto some crayons on the floor which might force me to take back whatever I just thought about my man because he definitely didn’t skip the coloring session.

Collecting the evidence, I headed to the living room where I found my mind goes blank covered by pink clouds and heart shaped confetti.

Because every single beautiful things you ever seen before is invalid. Baby ducks, little bunny, new born little finger, toddler munching his food, it’s not even able compared to the beautiful view right before my eyes.

Kibum slender body lied on our big indigo couch, head slightly higher on the edge but still pressed to the fabric lifelessly. A little head used his belly and chest as her pillow. Eyes tightly shut and mouth gaping one or two, Zooey enjoys her nap while hugging her favorite socks doll with her left hand.

“Ah, the dragon.. the dragon!! He’s breathing fire.. help..”

Apparently, Zooey inherited her Dad habit, sleep talking. And I’m about to giggle but someone cut me on the way.

“Go away, naughty dragon! Let the princess in!”

Holy crap. What’s cuter than your fiancée connecting his dream with your niece?! Unbelievable! Can’t let this precious moment brushed away, I pulled out my phone and captured it in one shot then deliberately send it to Siwon, hoping he would kind enough to add another shopping bag for me.

“Come on, honey.”

I scope Zooey carefully to move her inside the room. After tucked her in and make sure her monkey doll stay in her arm, I tiptoed outside and closed the door.

When I got back to the living room, the said prince is still in his dreamland. So I bent down to kiss him lightly on the lips. He seemed aware with my existence, his eyes fluttered opened and weak smile dangling on his face.

“She really had your energy.”

“Choi family is never disappointing, babe.”

“You must be tired. Where’s Zooey?”

“She’s sleeping in our room.”

“Come here,” Kibum moves further, making a room for me.

“No way, it’s barely enough for you, I’m no–– GOD!!”

When his hand tugged mine, I instantly fell down right on top of him. He laughed and forced me to smack his chest, “What the hell! You’re startling me!”

Kibum pulled my chin closer to his face. It’s still as soft as this morning.

“You can continue your assessment.”

“What?”

“So you can confirm that I can use my mouth to kiss you as good as I curse.”

I laughed on his lips and lose my balance when he turned to his side. One second I was worried fell down the couch and kiss the cold floor, but his hand already held on my waist tight, so I reward him with one long and considered hot kiss. By this rate, I almost forget how I panicked an hour ago when one of the baby beagles stuck on its way out and made its mother squealed painfully.

“How is it? Am I good?”

I chuckled and peck him one last time before whispering onto his lips, “The best I could ever have.”