^{THIS WAS A JOKE PLEASE DON'T TAKE IT SERIOUSLY. listen here. he originally wanted to make an aff advertising himself, tryna get a wo/man and my boy needs some good boy(girl)toy to save him from being lonely. he wants to have a date in his bio, too. he's not very fussy, so whoever's reading this, you're lucky! wow, jackpot!}

^{— mirrors replies. if he sends one word, then you're fine with sending one word back. but if he sends a sentence, you better turn that into two sentences or else he's gonna break up with you.
— able to talk about your day, your hobbies, your likes and dislikes, but can also mix in a few wow, i love you so much's in the convo.
— if you're dry as a saltine cracker, don't try. if you're moist like a good cupcake and you're good to go!
— just be yourself. if you're trying to be cute and jgdkfgd t ype like this, you're gonna get dropped fast.
— idk.. if you're cool, funny, hip, and just caring.. he'll be head over heels. just give him like, a while and he'll be so in love with you.
— couple dps. couple bios. anything of the like.
— occasional (preferrably frequently) rabbit dates.} 

^{please get him with someone. he's willing to fc bts members to woo you. he's never been in a proper relationship, but has been in a few so he has experience. he can even attach a resume to suit your needs. please date him, he's actually a really good boyfriend and is willing to hold your hand, maybe kiss too. idk, he's shy. i'll sum him up in a few points.}

^{— he's pretty ugly, if you're ugly too, then it's a match! but he's pretty cheesy too, ig. 
— can replicate memes exactly.
— willing to break up with you via tumblr. i think it's pretty romantic.
— when he's sad, he's extra soft. so just make him sad all the time.
— he'll facechase you if you're longguo.
— microwaves ramen? idk if you're into that, but i feel ramsay shaking at the moment.
— has a broken arm, so you have something to talk about if your convos die.
— he's always there if you're down! 
— i'm only joking about the negatives, he's actually really caring and you won't regret it.}

^{i made this as a joke but he's actually telling me to post this, shows how much he wants you in his dms! quote, i wanna go through the path of LOVE for the first time. please pm me for inquiries, i'll send you his resume and cover letter. twt / kkt.}