The Fridge is Empty

The Fridge is Empty
 

Uh oh, Eunwoo thinks when she opens the fridge and it's empty.

Uh frickin oh.

Her first thought is that Minkyung-unnie is gonna be mad.

Then her next thought is that Minkyung-unnie is going to be disappointed, rather than mad.

Then she realizes that Siyeon is the one who asked her to check the fridge and idly wonders if it's already too late for her to go running back to that one random group she bumped into when she was still a new vampire but who were creepy as all hell but still not going to be nearly as terrifying as Siyeon.

A hungry Siyeon.

A hand rests on her shoulder and Eunwoo jumps, turns around, and shrieks.

Yebin giggles.

“Yah!” Eunwoo smacks her. Yebin sticks her tongue out at Eunwoo.

“You really frightened me!”

“You're a vampire, you're supposed to do the frightening,” Yebin scoffs.

“You don't even watch horror movies,” Eunwoo snaps back.

Yebin shrugs, “In any case, we're at home. Why are you so jumpy?”

She points to the contents of the fridge, or the lack thereof.

“Oh,” Yebin says.

“Yes,” Eunwoo says, “Oh indeed.”


“It's empty…”

“Yeah,” Eunwoo hurriedly holds up her hands, “Wasn't me though! The last snack I grabbed from there was last week. You know I sneak stuff from my shift.”

Siyeon’s eyes narrow.

Eunwoo gulps - she's known Siyeon for practically forever now but still sometimes she's convinced that Siyeon can actually read minds. Even if Minkyung-unnie has said it a million times, that no, Siyeon cannot read minds, sometimes Eunwoo just cannot shake the feeling.

Well, if she could read minds this would be easier, Eunwoo's mind supplies, because she'd read it and see that you're not lying to her.

Good point, brain, Eunwoo thinks.

Siyeon opens , then closes it when the door opens.

“So we're out,” says Minkyung who sweeps into the room with far more grace than is strictly necessary, sheds her blazer and hangs it up in the coat rack.

“The fridge and freezer are both empty.”

“The freezer too?”

Eunwoo nods.

Minkyung frowns, “Nayoung is going to be unhappy.”

Eunwoo blanches. She had not realized that Nayoung would be back quite this soon.


“Oh,” says Nayoung.

Eunwoo fiddles anxiously with her thumbs, rubs circles on her hands.

She's not the newest member of their not-quite family but Nayoung just returned from spending a decade with a different group helping them off the ground so they can learn to survive and it’s been a whole decade since Eunwoo has seen Nayoung in person and the first impression she wants to make is definitely not that the fridge is empty.

“Jieqiong,” Nayoung says, turns to someone behind her, “did you-”

Eunwoo freezes.

“Jieqiong?!” Siyeon leaps off the couch, literally flies at the person appearing behind Nayoung. (They are vampires. Literally flying is a thing.)

“You didn’t say you were bringing her,” Minkyung says.

Nayoung shrugs, “She wanted to come. For some strange reason she said she missed you all.”

“Unnie~”

Eunwoo would know this whine from anywhere, finds a smile spreading across her face. Yewon bounces out past her and the young ones basically end up glomping (there is no better word than glomp to describe what is happening) Nayoung and Jieqiong in a giant group hug.

Eunwoo finds herself dragged into the pile by a cold hand - probably Siyeon - she’s always had cold hands, probably from being turned in the middle of winter. (Even though Eunwoo knows that most of the vampire myths just aren’t true, Siyeon’s been a vampire for centuries. Centuries. Who knows what might have changed since then. Besides, Eunwoo has been alive for maybe fifty years so she gets to be skeptical.)

She takes this as her being temporarily forgiven.

Then someone’s stomach rumbles and Eunwoo mentally facepalms.


“So,” Nayoung says.

“Welcome back?” Kyungwon grins sheepishly.

“So,” Nayoung presses on, “exactly how long have you been starving for?”

She shoots a glance of not-quite-disapproval at Minkyung, who immediately deflects it towards Eunwoo.

Eunwoo knows she should have just stayed in bed yesterday and not gotten up because if she had done that there is no way her head would be on the figurative cutting board right now, because for the last time, she is not the one that took the last bag.

“We haven’t been starving,” Yewon pipes up.

Bless Yewon’s soul.

(Eunwoo doesn’t quite understand how Yewon hasn’t yet died of starvation somehow because the girl is the cutest most adorable could-never-hurt-an-actual-fly kind of soul which, as you might have noticed, does not quite click with vampires who need human blood to survive. Then again, Yewon was only turned fairly recently and she’s never needed blood from a time before humans had blood banks so...)

“The fridge is empty,” Siyeon says, “I’m hungry.”

“Well,” Minkyung says, “how long have you been hungry for?”

Siyeon has the grace to look at least slightly sheepish, “like two weeks?”

Heads snap over to her.

“W-What,” Siyeon mumbles, “I just found this thing called anime, ok, and there’s like this thing called One Piece and there are like 500 episodes and-”

Minkyung’s eyes light up a little before they narrow back down, “So basically you’re about to die then.”

Siyeon shrugs, “Wouldn’t be if the fridge weren’t empty.”

Everyone looks at Eunwoo. Including Kyla.

Eunwoo takes in a deep breath, “For the last time, I just checked the fridge, I didn’t take whatever the last container was, don’t shoot the messenger. And you know I snack at work.”

Nayoung massages a temple.

The room feels colder. Eunwoo knows this has nothing to do with vampiric powers because they are vampires, not elementals - that’s a whole different story entirely.

“Alright,” Nayoung says, “there’s no point in pointing fingers.”

Eunwoo wants to make sure people actually do know that she was not the one who took the last bag or bottle or container, whatever it might have been, but realizes that talking about it is really only going to make Nayoung really mad so she closes , says nothing, and feels slightly proud of herself for saying nothing.

“When’s the earliest we can get something?”

“Well,” Sungyeon says, “technically...”


Eunwoo thinks that this is the stupidest idea ever and wastes no time in letting Yebin know that she thinks it’s the stupidest idea ever because she is Eunwoo and Eunwoo is not afraid to let people know what she thinks about Kyungwon-unnie’s ideas.

“I can’t believe we’re going to break into the blood bank,” Eunwoo hisses.

“Shh,” Yebin digs an elbow into her side and Eunwoo yelps.

“It’s not the blood bank if the blood isn’t in the shelves yet,” Sungyeon says.

“Just because it’s not been placed in the right shelves yet doesn’t mean this is any better,” Eunwoo says, “at least we’re not stealing from the cord blood bank. That would just be even worse.”

“Cord blood?”

“Y’know, stem cells, blood, babies...”

“Oh, I bet we could-”

“Don’t finish that sentence. Don’t. Just because killing kids wasn’t illegal when you were turned doesn’t mean that-”

“I’m just hangry, I’m not evil and killing kids has always-”

“If you two don’t shut up and end up getting caught,” Minkyung hisses over the intercom, ‘I will not come to bail you out.“

“We don’t get caught,” Siyeon mumbles.

“I heard that,” Minkyung says, “and I have a lot to say on this subject but you should watch out because there might be a night guard.”

“Put your masks on,” Yebin says.

Eunwoo puts her mask on.


“That was surprisingly easy,” Siyeon says as they turn the corner.

“See, I told you we’d be able to make it work,” Yebin whispers, “but keep it down. Can’t have him figuring out we lied to him about an emergency.”

“Did you say O,” the guard’s voice says.

“Yes,” Yebin says smoothly, steps in front of Eunwoo, “but we’re good here, thank you very much for your time, sir. We’ll be able to check out and file the paperwork and would hate to keep you here any longer than you have to.”

The guard smiles, nods, “I’ll leave you ladies here then. Have a wonderful night.”

“Oh, we will,” Siyeon says.

Sungyeon steps on her foot the moment the guard turns the corner. Siyeon whips right around, murder in her eyes. Sungyeon just rolls her eyes, mimics, “Oh we will. What is this, checking out alcohol at the store?”

“Eunwoo,” Yebin says, “What’s the difference between O+ and O-?”

“I like the minus but Nayoung likes the plus,” their intercom crackles to life, “and take your time choosing but hurry up will you? We don’t have all day.”

“Night,” Yebin says, “We don’t have all night, unnie.”

The intercom stays silent, before it comes on again.

“Jung Eunwoo, Kang Yebin, Bae Sungyeon, Park Junghyun,” Nayoung says, “where are you?”

“We’ll be right there, Nayoung-unnie,” Siyeon says, “we’ll be right there. No more fooling around. No more playing. We’ll be good kids, we promise.”

“Good.”


“This is an ice cream truck,” Sungyeon unhelpfully points out.

“Get in the ice cream truck,” Minkyung says.

“You don’t have a license,” Siyeon says.

“I do have a license,” Minkyung says, “get in the ice cream truck.”

“I don’t feel safe,” Eunwoo says.

“You don’t have to feel safe. I have a license. Get in the ice cream truck,” Minkyung says.

“You stole the license off of a dead body,” Yebin says, “I really don’t feel safe.”

“I did not steal the license off of a dead body. You don’t have to feel safe. I actually do have a license. Now will you four shut up and get in the damn ice cream truck?”

Eunwoo and Yebin exchange hesitant glances.

The passenger side window rolls down and Nayoung just looks at them.

Eunwoo may or may not have fought Yebin to be the first one into the truck.


Sungyeon gently tips the contents of the sack onto the table.

Eunwoo watches Jieqiong’s jaw drop.

“Y-You- is that the entire hospital?!”

Siyeon sips at her pack with a straw, color already returning to her pale cheeks, “Not quite. You should have seen what they had in there.”

Eunwoo thinks there is something to be said about a sixteen hundred year old vampire that looks like she’s sixteen drinking blood out of a blood bag through a straw like one does one of those juice pack thingums, but she would much rather not be the one to point that out.

She notices Yebin biting back a cough as Siyeon stabs another pack with a straw - why these bags just puncture neatly instead of splitting she does not know but now it is incredibly difficult to unsee the mental image of a juice pack.

Minkyung sighs, “As long as it doesn’t trigger an audit, we should be fine.”

“About that-”

Minkyung sighs again.

Nayoung purses her lips.

“I was about to say that we had Eunwoo doctor the records,” Sungyeon looks smug, pauses, “get it?”

Minkyung facepalms.

Eunwoo has to admit the pun is pretty good, but she’s not quite a full doctor, just a nurse-in-training.

Kyungwon sniggers. Kyla smiles.

Nayoung sighs.

“So,” Yewon says, “how was eye-oh-eye?”

“Good,” Jieqiong says, brushes imaginary lint off of her shoulder. Or maybe real lint. Who knows.

“They’re mostly smart kids,” Nayoung says, “they’ll survive. Probably won’t starve themselves nearly to death by watching One Piece non-stop.”

Siyeon flashes a toothy, reddened smile at her.

“We missed you too.”

Nayoung sighs again.

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melladyajayani
#1
Chapter 1: It looks like they will have so much trouble in the future, so I hope you continue this hehehe. Really enjoyed this story, good work!!
Mnetruinedmylife
#2
Chapter 1: This is freakin adorable, I think it's also the first time I've read a vampire AU without it being all angsty, it's quite refreshing. I love the team's dynamic, wouldn't mind seeing more in this universe. I know you classified it as 'crack ' and I can see how it can be read that way, but honestly I just read it as a humorous story, doesn't seem 'cracky' (for lack of better term) at all.