Sugar sugar

You know I’m the indifferent type right? 
You know, someone who just says whatever
I was like that up until recently

It was psychology class. Half of the class were dozing off, another half were playing with their phones or exchanging gossips. I was one of the ten percent who were pretending to scribble notes and pay attention, but honestly my mind were elsewhere. I was just staring blankly at the professor, his dull voice echoed throughout the lecture hall, in through my left ear, out through my right. 

I saw my friend Jongup at the second row from the front, tapping the shoulder of the boy sitting in front of him. He looked as if he was asking the boy for something because the boy smiled and searched through his bag. He handed a notebook to Jongup - I thought so. They probably had the same class, and now Jongup’s copying someone else’s hard work, but I’m no different.

I was looking at their direction, eyes slowly getting out of focus. The boy saw me and waved at me with a big grin, I’m not sure if I know him, although he did look familiar. Jongup also turned to look at me, squinting his already tiny eyes, it seemed that he couldn’t make out who I was because I was seated at the very back. He quickly gave up and went back on copying the boy’s work. The other boy was still smiling at me, so I looked away, pretending to be busy with notes.

After class, I went over to greet Jongup who hadn’t budge from his seat. “Jongupoo.” I called out only to be ignored, he wouldn’t stop writing, it seemed urgent. 

“Hi Youngjae.” The boy from earlier said to me. His smile looked so kind, and genuine, something about it reminds me of lollipops and candy canes. Jongup finally put his pen down and looked up at us, “...uh..oh. Oh. Ooooohhh. Okay, I get it now.” He mumbled quietly and went back to writing. He was always weird. 

The boy chuckled and roughly patted Jongup on the shoulder. He glanced at me and smiled the lollipop smile, making me crave for some. “Do you have class after this, Youngjae? Do you want to join us for lunch?” He asked kindly.

“...uh y-yes.” I stuttered. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I never stutter.

“Great-”

“..no. I mean yes I have class.” I said before excusing myself, more like running away. I could hear him laughed and yelled ‘bye’. I still yet to figure out where did his familiar face came from. It was getting to me but my mind was filled with sugary sweetness. 

-

Sugar, I keep thinking of you
Sugar, but I’m holding it in

On Friday night, I went over to Jongup’s house to spend the night with him. We played games and snacked up on potato chips but weirdly I was craving for lollipops and marshmallows. I asked him about the boy with the sugar smile, trying my best to sound casual. If Jongup knew I was curious, say, about the boy, then I’ll be doom. Because I’m always the indifferent type. I don’t really give any much thoughts into things. With a low voice, and barely audible voice, Jongup said that his name is Daehyun.

Nope, doesn’t ring a bell. Never heard of a daehyun.

He paused the game and raised an eyebrow at me, “Why’d you ask?”

Gosh. I stretched and yawned, looking away, “..nothing really, was just curious as to how did he know my name.”

“He asked me.” Jongup paused, his lips curled into a smirk, “..don’t get flustered, Youngjae. He asked me about all of my friends. He’s just a very friendly guy.” 

My eyes almost permanently stayed at the back of my head, how ridiculous, me getting flustered over such thing. I have to be careful with my words around Jongup, he might misunderstood me. My attempt of being careful with my words backfired because I ended up not talking at all the entire night, Jongup commented that I was being suspiciously quiet. I hate his teasing smile.

I couldn’t sleep that night. I kept thinking about Daehyun the sugar boy.

-

We had psychology class on Monday, and by choice I went up to sit with Jongup at the second row, he was always there because of his bad eye sight. It was so unlike me to sit in the front, the back row was my comfort zone and the back row guys were my family. 

I saw Daehyun coming from the front door, he was going for the front row seat but when he saw me, he smiled and went over to sit next to me. A sugary smile plastered on his face, it was there when he entered and will probably still stay there when he sleeps at night. 

“Hi.” He smiled. Jongup nodded and looked away. I hope I wasn’t blushing because I felt really shy. I muttered a nervous ‘hi’ back and the nervousness must’ve sounded obvious because he chuckled before taking out his notebooks. 

Daehyun is the one percent who focused in class and writes down actual notes. I rarely meet this one percent so he must be special. I tried to focus as well but I was so distracted with the sweet sugary vibe I was getting from him. It’s almost overwhelming, the sweetness. His fairytale prince like presence made me feel small and lost.

I like him. I really do. Although, I bet everyone likes him, who doesn’t like sugar? But I don’t see Jongup getting all sweaty and change a hundred and eighty degree when he’s around. I like a lot of people, there’s a cute girl in my class that I like, but she didn’t seem to affect me the way that he does.

-

He’s not even Kang Dongwon, Kim Soohyun or Lee Minho
But I like him so much, does that even make sense?

A few minutes before the period ends, Daehyun kept on checking on his watch. He noticed me staring at him so he smiled and whispered, “I have to go. I have somewhere to be. See you.” He packed his things and left the class ever so politely.

Jongup glanced up from his note and shoved me a knowing look. His smirk though - I hate him.

“What?” I muttered, annoyed. 

“Nothing. You’re just acting weird these days. You don’t have to say anything, because I think I know.” 

“No! Really...geez. There’s nothing going on with me. I’m not feeling weird. I wasn’t nervous. What are you saying? Daehyun is a nice person. He is a person.” I had to stop talking because the cats out of the bag, Jongup knew.

-

You know, I’m the type to only give a little of my heart
I’m good with controlling how much I like someone
I was like that up until recently

On Wednesday, I had lunch with Jongup. Daehyun happened to be in the cafeteria and decided to join us. He was with another friend, but his tall friend excused himself and so did Jongup. I almost cried when Jongup left because I can’t seemed to talk to Daehyun. My mouth got all watery from all the sugar craving when I see him. 

However, things got less awkward because he was so sweet all I had to do was add a little bit of bitterness to it. Everytime I said something mean about someone he laughed and added a sweet remark to it. It was fun talking to him, I couldn’t stop blabbing, I missed my literature class but it was worth it. 

Daehyun told me he volunteered to help at the elderly home on the weekends so he couldn’t join me and Jongup to the movies. I was upset but also at the same time I couldn’t help but admiring him to the max, he’s such an angel. I looked at my palm and realised it was shaking from overdosage of glucose. I had to go.

My heart wanted to burst, so I pressed down on my chest. I smiled the entire day - they said when you’re sugar high you won’t be able to sleep, and they were right. Another sleepless night for me.

-

This is my first time
I can’t control my heart
I keep getting pulled to him

We didn’t go the the movies on the weekend, because I ended up going to the elderly home that Daehyun volunteered at. He was surprised to see me. He looked really happy to see me, he looked happy all the time so maybe it wasn’t because of me. 

I sat and talked with an old woman, I nagged her a lot so Daehyun came over laughing and massaged her shoulders, he didn’t say anything though. He just stood there, laughing as he listened to our conversation.

At noon, we signed out and we walked to the bus stop together. I really like him, I could imagine myself dating him, we’d be perfect together. His smile will probably be the death of me and I would still not mind it. If we date, I’ll get diabetes so maybe it was for the best... when he said he’ll be meeting up with his girlfriend later. 

I hope she get diabetes.

-

He’s like a sweet sugar boy
It’s like I’ve gone crazy sweet sweet
I tried to push him away but why …

I cried a lot that night. I called Jongup and yelled at him for no reason at all. 

Monday came and I sat at the very back, my old spot. Daehyun found me and sat by my side. He talked about our weekend plans, he was hoping that I’d help out at that stinkin home again. I ignored him and told him I’m not interested in old people. His brows knitted, but sugar is still sugar. He smiled and asked me what’s wrong. 

“...sushh. I’m trying to focus.”

“Do you want to have lunch together later, then?”

How can I say no? I really like him after all.

-

He’s like a magical sugar boy
Can’t quit it sweet sweet
My heart is going to rot and hurt but …

We had lunch together and I found myself feeling lighter once more. I forgot about the pain I felt, the excessive sugar is healing me. I’m addicted and I can’t go back to normal. If there’s a cure to this, then please help me. 

I love him. I just thought that perhaps he does too? Because the way he stared at me was really something. He was always happy when he sees me. 

He was always a happy person so it’s really confusing.

Sugar, I keep thinking of you
Sugar, but I’m holding it in
Sugar, it’s really not easy
Sugar sugar sugar

A/N: Don't worry, the ended up getting married <3