March 2010.

That was the month and year I had my first crush. He was no stranger as we've been in the same class since 1st grade. It's a wonder how someone that was just one of your classmates can all of a sudden make your heart flutter, and make you smile for no reason. 

We never actually talked. I was quiet and an introvert while he was shy and always hanged around his friends. 

We would go on to steal glances at each other during class. Sometimes, one of us would be brave enough to start a conversation. I would go to school every day and go to every school activity just to see him. Before I knew it, the crush turned to like and by the time we reached highschool, I was already in love with him.

"Juls!," my friend Rin yells as she ran across the classroom to where I was.

"How was your summer? OMG I have so much to tell you! I met this guy when I was on vacation...." 

Typical Rin. Unlike me, most of my friends are outgoing and loud. They spoke their minds with no thought.

I pretend to be interested in her story. She's saying something about a guy she met while on vacation at her mom's hometown. They went hiking, watched movies and biking all over town. I give out the typical reaction responses like 'Really?!', 'That sounds fun!' and the occasional nodding of my head in agreement. 

What I'm really interested about is to find out where he is. I glanced around the room searching for him in the sea of faces. But he's no where to be found. I haven't seen him since last school year. I wonder if he got a new haircut. Did he grow taller? Where did he go for summer vacation? I just wanted to see him again. 

"Juls? Julia? Who are you looking for?"

"Oh, uhhmm, no one. Just... looking around, I mean I haven't seen anyone over summer. Everyone looks the same but different at the same time" I said

"Yeah... oh! speaking of different, I heard Daehyun transferred to a different school" she said indifferently 

"What?!" 

Did I hear that right? It can't be. 

No, Rin probably meant a different person. 

"My mom bumped into his mom at the supermarket. Daehyun's dad got transferred so they had to move. It's not that far though, just 30 minutes away by bus"

I know is sounds silly, but for some reason I feel somewhat...abandoned? 

Just last schoolyear we were starting to get closer to each other. We even talk about stuff not related to school. But now, I'm not even sure if I'll see him again. I was looking forward to this year. I was hoping to get to know him more. It felt like fate is just too cruel to me, the relationship ended before it could even start.

"Hey, are you okay?" Rin asks while giving me nudge, shaking me from my thoughts.

"Uhh yeah I'm fine. Just spacing out" I said forcing out a smile.

"Don't tell me... do you like him?"

"Huh? who? Daehyun?! No! No! Seriously, just spacing out" 

That didn't sound convincing at all.

When did I get to this point? I knew I liked him but this feeling. It's much more than that. Since when did he have this much effect on me?

Maybe it was then, the first time he smiled at me. He smiled from ear to ear that his eyes disappeared and these lines showed on his face like whiskers on a cat. Or maybe it was when he bought me snacks because I forgot my wallet at home. Or was it when he would pull pranks on me just to get my attention. 

I don't know when it started but what does it matter. It's all over now.

I was drowned in my thoughts that I completely missed what Rin is talking about as we walked to the cafeteria. I have to stop thinking about Daehyun and start listening to Rin before she gets any more suspicious of me. 

"I am telling you, he is sooo cute! He has this delicate can't-hurt-a-fly thing going on but I bet he can fight anyone if he wants to. Too bad he lives like 2 hours away and the only time I'll see him again is whenever my mom visits"

"Why didn't you get his number?"

"I would if he had a phone" Rin said as she gives a deep sigh.

She's met a lot of guys before but this is the first time she'd ever talk about a guy this much. She must really like him. But just our luck that both of us like guys that live far. 

"Youngjae?!" Rin exclaimed in utter shock.

"Rin?!" said the guy in return.

I gave both of them a confused look. This must be the guy she met over vacation. 

He looks lanky but capable. His physique is feminine but Rin was right, he'd be able to protect someone if he wants to. He also has this cute innocent expression and his eyes, it feels like if you look directly at it, you'll melt. 

Rin goes and gives him a hug. It looks like neither of them knew the other goes to this school. They exchanged pleasantries and continued to ask each other how the rest of their summer went. She clearly already forgot about me until he asked.

"Who's your friend?" he said, gesturing towards me. 

"Oh yeah, this is my bestfriend Julia. Julia this is Yoo Youngjae," she replied

"He's the guy I've been talking about" she adds under her breath

"I know" I replied in the same manner.

"Nice to meet you" I said, addressing him.

"So why are you here? Did you transfer?" Rin is back to asking him questions. My bestfriend really has fallen for this guy, she keeps forgetting I exist!

"Yeah, well I was supposed to move here for college after I graduate highschool but things happened and I ended up moving a year early. I'm staying with my aunt for now since she lives nearby" he said, although he seem to be only talking to her. 

These two are clearly on their own little world. They didn't even notice that I've walked away and continued to walk to the cafeteria. 

So I guess this is how it's gonna be. It would've been better if Daehyun was here. 

Only several days have passed but it feels like we're already halfway through the school year. Rin and Youngjae continue to get closer. They spend almost all their free time together. Rin never fails to invite me too but everytime I hang out with them it just feels like I'm the third wheel. But I'm happy for my bestfriend. Afterall, I've never seen her smile the way she smiles for him since she broke up with her first boyfriend. 

"Now before you guys go home, just a reminder that tomorrow we will have a friendly soccer game against Wexford High School. So their students are going to be visiting our school as well. Principal Baker wants everyone to welcome them and for everyone to try and be on their best behaviours. Got it?" says Ms. Lee before she dismisses us. 

The class gives a unison "Yes" while packing up. 

"I'm gonna go ahead, I have to stop by somewhere before I go home" I told Rin who's still putting her stuff away. 

"Ok, Ill see you tomorrow!" she says. 

She'll probably walk home with Youngjae. Turns out, Youngjae's aunt lives 4 houses down from her house. So they've been walking to and from school together. Nothing really changed between Rin and I. It's just now, her time is divided between me and him. 

I was walking towards the entrance gate to the school when I saw something that stopped me on my tracks. 

My heart starts to flutter again.