It had been days and Irene still hadn’t recovered. She sat out in the hall, trying to catch her breath as the rest of her members continued inside the practice room. If she leaned her head against the wall, she could just barely hear the thump thump of the bass still pounding away. She was angry at herself. She knew how dangerous it was to drop her Masque for Wendy when she wasn’t in complete control of it, and it had taken all of her energy just to show her, let alone try to keep the intensity in check. It was careless, and the consequences could have been dire.

And now she was too spent to even practice with her own group, with their debut right around the corner.

“Irene?” It was Amber again, strolling up the hall with her hands shoved in her pockets.

Irene raised her eyes and gave her a weak smile. “Sorry if I don’t get up; I can’t seem to stand at the moment.”

Amber knelt by her side quickly, only just shy of touching her as she looked Irene up and down. “Are you okay? What’s wrong?”

Irene shook her head, “I’m not hurt or anything. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to worry you.”

Amber narrowed her eyes, pausing in her appraisal. “Your Seeming,” she said lowly. “Not a single sparkle. What happened?” She knew Irene didn’t have a strong enough Masque to hide it from her, so something must be wrong. “Are you upset?” She'd have to be pretty distraught for her Seeming to snuff out completely like this, but the possibility was still there.

Irene laughed dryly and shook her head. “Only at myself. I dropped my Masque for Wendy,” she explained. She saw Amber’s expression darken and she sobered up. “I know it was stupid. Trust me, I regret it now.”

Amber barely bit back a scolding. “You need to harvest. You look spent.”

“I know.”

“Irene, you really need to be careful. Your Seeming-”

“I know.”

Amber sat next to her against the wall. “I know you know,” she sighed. “But I’m serious about the harvest. You can’t just walk around on empty - it’s not safe.”

Irene looked at her askance. If she didn’t have any energy, she posed no threat to someone with her Seeming. This was the safest she had felt since she first realized what her true nature was, and now Amber was telling her it wasn't 'safe'? The irony almost made her laugh.

“I was hoping I could wait until our debut stage. The company promised there would be a lot of people in the audience.” The perfect opportunity to regain what she had spent.

Amber nodded knowingly, the give and take of their career, the true secret to SM’s success. “Yeah concerts are always convenient, but you can’t wait that long. When is your debut, in a week?”

“Two weeks,” Irene corrected. She was counting down to the minute; finally, her dream was coming true.

“There’s always Seulgi, you know,” Amber suggested.

“No,” Irene said heatedly, then continued more calmly, “No, Amber. Not Seulgi.”

Amber raised her hands disarmingly. “I’m just saying, there are advantages to having a mortal on your team.”

“How could I ever look her in the eye again after that?” Amber could see Irene was really distressed at the thought.

“It’s Seulgi. I love the kid, but how deep down the rabbit hole does that mind of hers really go?” Amber sincerely doubted Irene was going to find anything terribly incriminating in that girl’s head, but Irene continued to give her that trademark glare. “Sheesh, okay, I get it.” She didn’t really, though. Amber did it all the time. “But give it some thought. It’s not like you have a lot of time to go out and find some really excitable person on the street to harvest from.”

Irene looked sullen. Amber had a point. She couldn’t let this fatigue keep her from her final preparations for their debut. It wouldn’t be fair to the team, like tripping at the finish line. She had a decision to make.

Amber could see she was starting to debate the point. “She wouldn’t even have to know you were there,” she reasoned.

Irene met her gaze. Amber may be younger, but she was still her senior in every other sense of the word. She was more practical and experienced with all of this, the intricacies of their world, its... complicated morals.

Amber clapped her on the shoulder suddenly, glancing at her watch. “Do what you need to do, but keep in mind it’s for everyone’s benefit.” She stood up. “I’m here for Wendy. Can you see if they’re just about done in there? This is your last practice for the night, right?”

Irene nodded and held out her hands. Amber helped pull the smaller girl to her feet. “Up we go…!” She opened the door for Irene.

The music had already stopped and the girls were receiving final instructions from their choreographer. Wendy was standing near the wall, using it for support as she stretched out her legs. Joy was collapsed in a chair, and Irene could see the sheen of sweat on her forehead from across the room. Seulgi was crouched over her duffle bag, probably looking for her towel.

Irene waved to get Wendy’s attention and she came over immediately. “Are you feeling better?” Wendy asked, concern showing plainly on her face.

Irene gave her a faint smile. “I’ll be fine. Amber’s here for you. I’ll tell the others where you went.” Wendy smiled in thanks and ducked past her through the door to follow Amber. Irene entered and walked over to the choreographer.

Seulgi finally retrieved her towel and wiped at her neck absently as she realized Irene had returned. She still seemed weak, as Seulgi watched her talking to the instructor, swaying a little and hugging her arms in front of herself.

Seulgi glanced over at Joy, who was also watching Irene. “Are you ready to head back?” Seulgi asked.

“Yes,” Joy gasped dramatically, holding a hand out for Seulgi’s towel.

Seulgi rolled her eyes and tossed it to her. “Alright, let’s go, then.” She walked over to Irene and in a rare move, she put an arm around the smaller girl’s waist.

Irene was so surprised, she almost forgot what she had been saying. “Th-thanks for tonight. I’ll be sure to work on what you covered on my own so I’ll be ready for next time,” she said, though she was eyeing Seulgi curiously.

As the choreographer left, Seulgi smiled down at Irene. “Come on, I’ve got you. You still seem a little weak, so you can use me for support 'til we get back.”

Unfortunately, Irene was going to have to use Seulgi for a little bit more than that. It made her feel even more guilty about what she was going to do, but if Seulgi was noticing how weak she was, then it must be worse than she thought. “Thanks,” was all she muttered as Seulgi ushered her out of the room.

They slowly walked back to the dorm, down the street from the main building. It was still very warm, despite how late it was, and Seulgi already missed the air conditioning. She felt Irene’s steps begin to drag and she stooped a little and hooked the smaller girl’s arm around her shoulders. “Hey, are you alright? Do you need to stop?”

Irene just shook her head. “I’m sorry, I’m just really tired.” Every concerned look from Seulgi and Joy just made her feel even more like an idiot.

Joy paused in front of them. “I could call the manager,” she suggested, trying to catch Irene’s eye. "He could pick us up."

Irene shook her head, giving Joy a meaningful look. “No, don’t, I… I don’t want to worry him.” Or hear any of his suggestions for how to regain her lost energy. She and Joy shared a long look until Seulgi spoke.

“Joy,” Seulgi said as she held out her duffle bag. “Can you take this?” Joy nodded and took her bag in a rare show of complicity. If Irene didn’t want to call their manager, she must have a plan, and Joy would defer to her judgment.

Seulgi disentangled herself from Irene and crouched in front of their leader. “Here, get on,” she said looking over her shoulder.

Irene looked at her, mildly scandalized at the thought of being carried. “What? No.”

Seulgi rolled her eyes. “Come on, I want to get back to the dorm at some point tonight, so just get on. Please?” It was hot, she had just spent all day practicing for their debut, and her stomach was starting to grumble, but the only thing she could think about was Irene. The older girl was usually the one taking care of the others, so to see her in this weakened state was disconcerting.

Irene considered for another moment before carefully climbing up onto Seulgi’s back and wrapping her arms around her neck. She made a small noise and wrapped her arms tighter as Seulgi stood and hoisted her up.

“A-ahaha-! Not so tight, don’t worry, I’ve got you…!” Seulgi said, a bit strangled.

Irene buried her face in the back of Seulgi’s neck as Seulgi started carrying her back to the dorm. She didn’t like this one bit, not the fatigue, not the heat, not being up off the ground, but the farther Seulgi carried her, the more she began to relax.

Seulgi turned slowly, looking for Joy. “What are you doing?” She had stopped several paces behind them.

Joy was holding up her cell phone, taking pictures. “For posterity,” she smirked as she adjusted the view.

Seulgi rolled her eyes and kept walking. She could feel Irene’s breath tickling the back of her neck and squinted. If she weren’t so worried, she might have even smiled, but these weren't exactly ideal circumstances. She freed a hand and gently placed it on Irene’s arm, rubbing it with her thumb. “Hey, are you still okay?” she whispered. Irene nodded against her shoulder. “Good.” She turned again. “Joy, can you go on in and order something?” she asked as they approached their building.

“If it’s up to me, I’m getting beef.”

“Fine, whatever. My card’s in my bag.”

Joy danced on ahead, already dialing on her phone.

“We’re on a diet,” Irene murmured quietly, giving Seulgi goosebumps.

“Not tonight we aren’t,” she replied. “You could probably use a full meal.”

Seulgi wasn’t wrong, but this was more than simple takeout was going to be able fix. Seulgi brought them into the foyer of the dorm and Irene looked up at the first flight of stairs. “You are not carrying me up those stairs.”

“Wanna bet?” Seulgi said with a grin.

“Let me down! You can’t!” She pounded on Seulgi’s shoulder with a fist.

“Ow, ow! Good to know you can still punch, even if you can’t walk,” Seulgi laughed. “Calm down, will you? Let me take care of you.”

Irene yelped when Seulgi hoisted her up again, getting a better grip, but she was too embarrassed to complain anymore. Instead, she just fretted about Seulgi’s progress up the stairs. They were only going to the second floor, but Seulgi wasn’t infallible.

Or was she?

She covered the distance much faster than Irene would have anticipated. Irene may be on a diet, but she still added about 90 lbs. to the poor girl’s back. Seulgi didn’t seem even a little daunted as she nudged the door to their suite open with her foot and headed into their living room. She walked them over to the couch, but instead of dropping Irene off gently, she simply tipped over and fell on top of her.

Irene shrieked. “Get off of me! And here I thought you were being kind and sweet!” she growled, pummeling Seulgi’s back with her fists.

Seulgi laughed and rolled off the couch. “Are you going to want to eat or should I take you to bed?”

Irene blushed brilliantly and held up a finger. “You are not carrying me to bed,” she warned, scooting to the far end of the couch.

Seulgi watched her curiously, managing to miss the implication of her own words.

“I put your bag in your room…” Joy said as she came into the living room. She paused as she saw the two very different looks on the older girls’ faces. “Uh, did I miss something?”

Irene composed herself while Seulgi eyed Joy suspiciously. “What did you order?”

Joy gave her a sweet smile. “You’ll see when it gets here~” was all she said.

+++

One sizeable chunk of Seulgi’s weekly stipend, and deliveries from three different snack stalls later, the girls - with the late addition of Wendy - were satiated.

“Oh boy, our manager’s going to kill us,” Joy laughed, looking at the stacks of empty carryout boxes.

“I’m going to kill you,” Seulgi said darkly as she shuffled through all the receipts, but hearing Irene snicker at the threat soothed her anger. Hopefully a real meal would help her, because with their pressing schedules, she wouldn’t have much time for rest. Wendy looked exhausted, too, with hair stuck to her damp forehead from whatever it was that she had been doing with Amber. Another dance lesson?

One by one the girls began to disperse, cleaning up the trash, washing up, getting ready for bed, until it was just Irene left alone on the couch with Seulgi standing before her.

“Are you sure you’re staying up?” Seulgi asked skeptically as she stretched, almost knocking into an end table.

Irene nodded, content to remain curled up on the couch the other girls had finally vacated. “I won’t be long, I just want to catch up on some videos,” she claimed, indicating her phone.

Seulgi blinked at her. Did Irene even know how to get on youtube? But maybe she was being unkind. She gave Irene a tired smile. “Alright. Don’t worry about waking me up when you come in,” she said as she trundled off to their shared bedroom.

Irene smiled wryly to herself. It was that very thing she was most afraid of.

She gave Seulgi an hour-long head start on falling asleep; it was a generous buffer for the slothy girl, but she didn’t want to take any chances. After all, it had been several years since she last attempted to Dreamride, and she wasn’t nearly as talented at it as some. Irene laboriously pushed herself off the couch and quietly crossed the darkened dorm suite. She paused for a moment at the door to Joy and Wendy’s room, trying to see if she could hear any activity inside. The crack at the bottom of their door was dark, but that didn’t mean the girls weren’t still awake. Wendy seemed to be a bit of a night owl, and it made Irene wonder if she and Seulgi shouldn’t be roommates instead.

Seulgi and Irene had been sharing a room off and on for years now as trainees so when it came time to assign rooms with the whole team, they had just naturally paired up. Irene had never been more thankful for such a convenient arrangement, as she crossed the hall and cracked the door open to their room. Predictably, Seulgi was already fast asleep, tangled in a sheet with her blanket kicked down to the foot of her bed. Irene rolled her eyes at her indelicate friend and carefully pulled the blanket back up to cover her.

She could just go to bed as well. She could just lay down, fall asleep, wake up early, and go find someone else to harvest from before breakfast. She didn’t have to violate Seulgi’s privacy and invade her deepest, most unadulterated thoughts. But as she watched Seulgi sleep, and reached out to brush some of her messy hair out of her face, the temptation to know grew.

Irene tore her gaze away and rolled her tired shoulders. Get it together, Bae, she’s probably just dreaming about food. Or maybe drawing? Was she dreaming about their upcoming debut? Was she so exhausted from rehearsing that she wasn’t dreaming at all? She carefully sat on the edge of the mattress and leaned over Seulgi’s sleeping form, lightly placing the tips of her fingers against the younger girl’s temples.

“Sorry, Seul…” she breathed as she felt the tug - the gravity of the Dreamscape her in.