[jungkook]

Lately I've been thinkin',

Thinkin' bout what we had,

I know it was hard,

It was all that we knew, yeah

 

 

 

The cold breeze greeted us through the rooftop window in the empty room except only a mattress laid on the cold floor. Gazing the stars through the small window will always be my utmost favourite avocation in my life. As long as she will be there besides me, my life is complete. Nothing more I could wish, she was my greatest gift. More than my life.

 

“I should close the window, it’s getting chiller here” I said as I afraid of her getting cold.

“No, I still want to look at those pretty stars. Those shinny diamonds in the sky” she said hugging me tighter blocking me from getting up to close the entrance of the cold air.

 

Her cute defense made me chuckled and I tried to find back my cozy position closer to her .But those sentences repeated again in my brain, looking for the right meaning behind those words. ‘Did she possibly ever missed to jewel herself? Like how she used to doll herself with before.’ And I didn’t know where that absurd idea came from knowing she’s a sincere girl.

 

Even she was not a girl who likes to spend merely for herself, but that was the way she brought up with. She is a precious diamond in Jung family. A diamond that was kept in the luxurious box, be enclosed in the clear glass, kept safely in the vault that commoner like me couldn’t even imagine to look up or worse, we didn’t even know that such diamond was even exist.

 

“Do you like diamonds? “I asked her.

 

“Yup, who doesn’t like that bling bling things?” she points her index finger towards the clear dark sky filled with the golden stars.

 

“Do you want a diamond? The real diamond?” I braved myself to ask a question that even I didn’t know if I could ever make it happen.

She, who rested her head on my chest a while ago, looked up into my eyes and stared them deeply, searching for jokes lying behind those words. Her smile faded when she saw the real intention behind it and she didn’t reply my smile like she used to. She still staring my eyes, like they were the wanted person that had to be concede to the sheriff. But those eyes never failed to mesmerize me every time they met mine. She cupped my cheeks and tenderly caressed with her delicate fingers.

 

“Loving something, doesn’t mean we have to possess them. Just looking them afar make you happy, more than you keep them. Because you know they’re in the right place.”

 

How deeper that could a heart fell onto? I kept falling for her deeper and deeper every day. How an ordinary person like me could came across a kind hearted goddess like her? That’s the reason that I didn’t dare to wish more, because I already had more than I should.

“But I already had two beautiful diamonds since we’re together and I can’t afford to lose them by anyway.” I told her.

 

Once again, she turned her head towards me. “I didn’t bring any jewels with me. How can you have that……. Are you stealing the diamondsss?!!” she quickly snapped me with her high pitch voice.

I couldn’t believe how she got those ideas from. “Don’t worry; I keep them in the safest place. Nobody will take them away unless you give them away” I whispered quietly to her left ear.

 

“Yah! I never want you to do things like that. Give them to me, I will send them back tomorrow”.

She will always be the honest and righteous person that I knew. And she never changes.

 

“I don’t think that I could give them away, because it always will be mine no matter how people seize them from me” I tested her.

 

Her face hardened but relents after thinking for a while. “I need nothing but you in my life. I can’t afford to lose you, peculiarly for a mere diamond.” She gave me a peck on my lips. Melting me with the foul move. She knew when to lose and when to win, when to move and when to give up.

 

“Am I not enough for you?” she asked me again.

 

And I won’t repeat how much she meant to me. “More than enough, jung sooyeon. I love you more than I could love someone.” I sealed a kiss on her forehead, marking her mine.

“To show you my love, I will tell you where the diamonds are” I continued.

She repeatedly nodded quickly, eager to know where I could hide them in such a small empty room.

 

I were slowly getting closer to her,

“The first place is here”

I kissed her right eyelid, forcing her to close her eyes.

“And the second one”

I did the same to her others. Her sparkling eyes were way prettier than the stars.

 

She still seemed clueless about what happened just now. “My precious diamonds that will never stop sparkling, and the one that I would never get tired of staring.” I explained to her.

 

She who started to understand what I meant, and let out her hearty giggles, couldn’t believe that I could be that mushy.

“Woah, you caught me off guard. I wonder where the shy Jeon Jungkook had missing on?” she acted looking around to find the missing me I guessed.

My old self didn’t gone missing, but he was built to become that myself won’t even thinking of before.

The jessica’s effect.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Jessica]

Have you been drinkin'

To take all the pain away?

I wish that I could give you what you deserve...

 

'Cause nothing can ever,

Ever replace you.

Nothing can make me feel like you do, yeah.

You know there's no one

I can relate to.

And know we won't find a love that's so true...

 

 

 

Have you been drinking to take all the pain away even once in your life? I knew Jeon Jungkook was not someone who drank to take down the pain. He would rather be strolling along the Han River and come back smiling to me like nothing happen. I wished to have the pure heart like his, not tinted by what the cruel world had served. Tonight, one of the rarest nights that I thought I could pass it without the help of alcohol. But I was wrong. The pain was unbearable for me to handle. They kept stabbing my heart with their unseen sharp words.

 

To be a chaebol wasn’t as easy as it seem. Every things you do, you are the centre of attention of the higher people. A fault that you did could affect your family’s honour, or stock of your family’s shareholder. A weight that you wouldn’t imagine to be that heavy to be carried, if you see from the outside.

 

To be born in Jung family wasn’t my wish, wasn’t me who choose to. Because in the Jung, you always have to pay an absurd amount for something that simply an ordinary people get it for free. Freedom, love and dream. I wouldn’t be allowed to dream if my father could see dreams, who already paved my path since I born. Me, who was thought to be obedient and never allowed to whine about anything that was been ordered.

 

I never thought that loving a man could be this hard. I just have to agree to anyone chosen by my father to be my life partner. But, who would know what life serve me in the future? The plans that my father thought would be the best for me, backfired himself at the end. Masking myself with the untitled student into the public high school and college, trying to associate me with most people from all background which making me easier to strengthen my family’s influence when the right time come. Unlike Krystal who was spoiled from beginning, favoured with everything which so opposite with me. But I never hate her, because I couldn’t stand to see her went through what I did. It’s enough only with me to had gone through it. We only had each other to rely on, the one who would share her love to me.

 

The first offspring who is favour to be a son, would be prepared by various practices i.e manners practice, military, sports, social and business skills since small. Me, who obviously a girl was hated from the first time my father held me. His dream to see a son who will inherit his legacy broke apart. Even I hated myself for not being able born as a boy and be his proud. I tried my hardest to compensate my lacking as a girl to reach his expectation even deep in my heart I knew he never would be satisfied.

 

 

 

 

***********************

 

 

 

“Who is that boy?” my father asked me waiting at the living room with the coffee in his right hand without divert his attention on the newspaper in the other hand. I just arrived from the college, surprised with his presence and was truly clueless about the question.

I greeted him like I supposed to do, and tried to answer his question that obviously toward me, since it’s just both of us there.

 

“Boy? I didn’t see any boy in here, Mr. Jung.” I answered him honestly, and I didn’t know if Krystal brought any boy home again, but I’m sure she wouldn’t after previous hurricane hit her before.

And for anyone who asked. Krystal and I never thought to call our father, dad or anything else. He never allowed us to drop the honorifics. He never showed his love through the action or words. And I didn’t know if he could actually love someone.

 

“Don’t play dumb, Jessica. Who is the boy that you hanging out lately, out of the class?!” He started to get annoyed.

 

Don’t tell me that he was found out about my relationship. ‘Damn. How would he know? Just give any answer Jessica! THINK!’ And for not to be in his bad record even once, I tried to give the best answer that he could accept.

 

“Don’t ever think to lie to me. Whoever it is, just broken up with him. I never accept any low class people to be in Jung’s family!”

 

“He’s not a low class people!” I shouted unconsciously. That’s so unacceptable to differentiate people through his background. Nobody wanted to be born in poor, like me who doesn’t want to live as a chaebol.

I must be crazy to talking back to my father. But I think love made me crazier. I can’t live in this plastic world anymore. So suffocating and breathless. I knew this day would come sooner or later, but not this fast.

 

His stare enough to give me cold shivered. But I had to stay strong, for this love. Jeon Jungkook didn’t deserve to be mocked like that. And I knew that my life wouldn’t be the same after this moment. To fight with my father meant to get ready to be dead.

 

 

 

*******************

 

 

I gulped down the beer till the last drop. Even a light alcohol could make me drunk, as I not used to it.

‘I wish that I could give you what you deserve, Jungkook. Not this shame or spite. I might be a selfish girl who still holds onto you even when I knew there won’t be easy for us. 'Cause nothing can ever, ever replace you. Nothing can make me feel like you do. You know there's no one I can relate to. And know we won't find a love that's so true.’

I’m

Sorry

Jungkook.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[jungkook]

There's nothing like us,

There's nothing like you and me,

Together through the storm.

There's nothing like us,

There's nothing like you and me,

Together, oh

 

 

 

Did you remember, Jessica? The first time we ever met. I remembered all too well that it felt like just happened yesterday. How the wall that I built long before started to collapse little by little when you came along.

 

 

The windy day was a bad day for me. I couldn’t deliver the advertising paper on that day, making me couldn’t help thinking a way to recover my burnt income. Walking through the sidewalk to the class seemed so far unlike the other days. Too much matters needed to be done, and I hated how money was the only solutions to all the problems. The mean world that needs the only things that I didn’t had.

 

The lecture hall was filled with the students, and for the first time I got to enter before the class started as my part-time job got cancelled. Mr Kwon entered right after I sat down on my favourite last row seat alone before my best friend Taehyung joined who apparently later than me. I tried to digest all the lecture earnestly knowing I won’t able to attend the extra class like others which made me sometimes annoyed with the uninterested students who sat in front of me playing with their phones.

 

The lecture wasn’t finish till the Mr Kwon notified the partner’s assignment about. Me, who never been fond with teamwork, really disliked the idea. Who didn’t know the introvert and shy boy, Jeon Jungkook? Yup, apparently nobody knew it as Taehyung was the only friend that I had. I will end up doing all the tasks as I couldn’t communicate with others well. Each partner’s names were listed downed by Mr Kwon. And I waited for my name to be called and hoping to be Taehyung’s partner.

 

 

“Jeon Jungkook and Jung Sooyeon”

……. Owh no. A girl. Hell yeah that I will work with her as this was my first time to hear such name. I only know Lee Sooyeon my previous team mate, who shoved all the works to me.

 

 

“Yah, how lucky you are to be partner with Jessica, the smart and beautiful girl,” Taehyung elbowed me.

 

“You’ve heard wrong. Mine is Jung Soo Yeon, not Jessica or someone else.” I corrected him.

 

“Nope, I heard it right. And dude, she’s the same person we’re talking about. Sooyeon a.k.a Jessica”

“and look, who’s here” he whispered to me.

 

 

I turned my head to see the person that nearing us. All people started roaming the lecture hall to find their designated partner after Mr Kwon dismissed the class. And I could see a girl climbing the stairs with the black backpack to the rearmost seat.

I started to pack my things to leave the class as I really wanted to avoid meeting any girl right now.

 

“Excuse me, is any one of you named Jeon Jungkook?” She asked looking at the paper that she jotted down to prevent from forgetting her partner’s name.

“He is Jungkook. By the way Jessica, don’t you remember me? Kim Taehyung, your History project’s teammate” Taehung was being himself, became over friendly with any beautiful girl that he met.

 

Her brows were crocked, trying to remember Taehyung’s existence. She won’t remember him, I bet. But I was wrong; she quickly snapped her fingers and gave taehyung a high five.

“Kim Taehyung, the history jokester! Of course I remembered you. You changed your hair colour again?” she started a conversation with him.

 

I took that chance to escape from there, never wanting to befriend with anybody. They would leave again when they knew the real pauper Jeon Jungkook who only knew to work. Especially, a girl like her, I supposed she wouldn’t do any part of the assignment and would be gave me the total responsible alone.

I walked faster to go to my next part-time job. And I could sense someone ran passed by me and stopped right in front of me, making me almost tripped over her. She tried to catch her breath and apologized at the same time, making me felt bad for escaping earlier.

 

She greeted me formally with a small bow.

 

“Hi, I’m Jung Sooyeon or people would call me Jessica. I’m your partner for the research’s project. Nice to meet you,” she offered me a handshake.

I quickly give her a bow to avoid her handshake. “Jeon Jungkook. Taehyung would call me Jungkook. And it would be easy for us, if I do all the research. So, I will give you a call once I done” I walked away from her. She would be happy to hear that, right?

 

“That’s so kind of you. But I won’t do that” she stopped me again

“A partner has to be in ups and downs. That was the purpose of a partner. We will make it together.”

 

I was not a person with words. But I wanted to tell her badly that I wouldn’t be comfor