It felt as if time had stopped around me.

Silence accompanied by nothing but empty thoughts.

Her wings looked as fragile as the wings of butterflies.

Despite the tears that have been welling up in my eyes, I took time to admire her face.

As bright as the sun, but there was no expression presented on her beautiful defined features.

Like a statue.

She didn’t speak a word, she remained standing still, giving me this deathly silence treatment.

We stood there, gazes on each other as if our eyes were magnetized.

Thoughts of everything about her raced inside my head, they were reminding me of how gorgeous she was, how graceful she looked and how she could always grasp my heart easily just by looking at me.

The most painful thoughts—questions, rather—eventually came, flooded in my head,

What was the reason for me to leave her?

Why did I shamelessly run away from her, from the person, I now realized, the most precious one to me?

Tears didn’t stop falling down my cheeks, my knees became so weak that I could barely stand strong.

My whole body kept trembling as I broke down onto my knees, holding them tightly in hopes that it would help shielding myself or making me feel less vulnerable.

“Chaeyoung…”

I cried harder as the sound of her calling my name.

It sounded so sweet yet the bitterness was visible in her voice.

She slowly approached me, I felt her kneeling down and a second later, I’ve finally found the warmth that I had most craved for, it crashed against my body.

She pulled me closer.

I was overwhelmed with the desire to breathe in her scent, yet I didn’t dare to.

“Why…?”

My voice cracked as I lost it, I cried out her name.

I recklessly flailed my arms and tried to loosen her grip as the pain in my chest exploded.

Why is she doing this?

I was so weak that those punches I threw at her didn’t even make her flinch.

She didn't try to stop me despite my continuous attacks, rather, she waited for me to finish tossing out my frustration.

I stopped until my energy and will were drained out.

We stayed like that for a while, with me—obscuring my whole body in her disappointedly welcoming embrace.

It felt like an eternity, but still, I surely did not want time to go pass.

“Stay. Let it all out.” She rubbed my head and tenderly whispered.

I felt my heart being so close to bursting out at the immensity of my emotions.

She sounded so soft, yet her voice was pushing me over the edge of a cliff.

I'm losing my mind.

I gathered all my courage to break our contact. When I did, the physical loss as expected, tore my heart into pieces.

I immediately yearned for the heat from her body, desperately wanting to feel it more against mine.

With a heavy heart, my gaze came up to her face as warmth shot painfully up my neck.

I reached my hand out, tracing my fingers absentmindedly along her features—slowly, steadily, carefully like I was dying to memorize them.

The way her brown orbs peered into mine, the way her plump lips defined the color rosy red, and everything.

Everything.

In that moment of myself getting lost,

I touched her lips as the realization hit me, hard.

She was Jennie’s.

She wasn’t mine anymore.

She wasn’t someone for me to hold on to,

She wasn’t someone for me to lean on,

It would probably be best if I kept myself far away from her, as far as possible.

But I wish I could.

It's like there was a breakable chain which has been attached to my body and I had no intention to weigh it off me.

I cleared my dry throat, whispering, “I’m sorry…”

It was so quiet. I, myself almost didn’t hear it and I was afraid if she did. Deeply breathed in, I spoke one more time to make sure she’s heard it, “Lisa, I’m sorry...”

She widened her eyes and looked at me in surprise as if the sentence was forcefully being pushed into her head, she was carefully analyzing the words that had come out of my mouth.

Her most needed words from me.

Also the words I owed her.

And I swear, at the moment, I was certain there was something in her eyes—something akin to repentance, or was it pity.

Lisa closed her eyes, but mine didn’t leave her face even for a fraction of a second.

And as soon as she opened them, her eyes overflowed with tears.

I bit my bottom lip to keep them from quivering as the sight achingly pierced through each of the shattered pieces of my heart.

I cautiously blinked my eyes just to get rid of the blur, but that didn’t help.

The vivid image of her breaking down made me feel more useless.

Everything was excruciating to me, maybe, to both of us.

Fragile.

Yet, both were broken by the other.

Sometimes in life, you can’t control your affections, emotions towards other people. You can’t just shut those genuine feelings in.

My eyes found their own way to her lips, and there they were, those thumps inside my heart… My hand rose up to her neck, I felt myself pulling her head down, and the feel of her lips brushing against mine—there.

Thump.

Like the invisible wall has been taken down.

The last thing I remembered was how soft and sweet those lips were.

////

I quietly sat in my seat, sensing all the attentions were focused on me, I started getting nervous under all of these unwanted stares from the people around me.

As if Lisa could see the way my body tensed up, she moved and sat in the seat next to mine.

Not going to lie, but I was curious to know what people were going to say when Lisa settled by my side. Yes, to be frank, I was specifically looking forward to how Jennie would react.

I glanced around and my eyes met hers.

Jennie had her brows furrowed. She immediately flashed me her sweet smile and looked down to where her hands were, and as her friend for so many years, I could see through that. Jennie was biting her lip as she played with her index fingers.

She looked hurt.

I set my eyes back to the person sitting beside me.

And the words that I knew I would regret saying straight away after being spoken, had escaped through my lips, “You should go back.”

Lisa creased her brows and stared at me with her beautiful deer-like eyes, I barely caught the sight of her disappointed face before a cold, expressionless one was switched back on.

I waited for her to say something but all she did was staring right back at me as if she wanted me to catch m