Can't Go Back to Yesterday

Toto

Youngmi stepped out of the mirror, her feet landing on the creaky floorboards beneath. She looked around the room. It was awfully familiar. She turned and looked at the mirror she just came out of. The white paint was chipped and faded, and the entire thing was covered in dust and cobwebs. The mirror looked exactly like the one she kept in the corner of the room, the one that had belonged to her mother.

 

She spun around and on the opposite side of the room was a bed with a metal frame. The mattress full of holes and the comforter shredded to pieces. Although faded the blanket had a noticeable blue flower pattern.

 

Youngmi’s mouth hung open, gaping at what she was seeing. It was her room. She looked at the mirror again and sure enough it was the one from her mother. Youngmi was in absolute shock. What was going on?

 

She ran out of the room and looked around, everything was so familiar. She nearly fell down the stairs racing to the bottom. The kitchen, the living room, everything. It was her house, and it was in shambles. It looked as if nobody had lived in it for many years. The furniture and photos had all remained in the same places, just like the day she had left. But she noticed that the only thing that was missing was the picture frame at the bottom of the staircase.

 

Youngmi ran outside and studied the building. It was completely falling apart. What was going on?

 

She ran into town, hoping to find some explanation to why her house was ruined. When she got there everything was noticeably different. Every building was not as it was before. As she looked around the people too were different. There wasn’t a single face that she recognized.

 

She slowly made her way through town, looking all around, taking in everything. It was all different. There were several people talking into and tapping at square devices that she had not once seen before. They were very strange. Sleek and shiny contraptions that utterly confused her. What was going on?

 

Most of the shops she entered had different sorts of technology that looked very odd. Pictures played across big square screens. Sounds accompanied the pictures, with music and people talking. There were other smaller screens and below them sat what looked to be a flat typewriter. She didn’t at all understand what see was looking at.

 

Other shops served food and beverages, most of which was familiar, others not so much. A store that just served coffee was placed in the spot where the library was supposed to be. So strange. What was going on?

 

As she walked around everything confused her, it honestly was starting to give her a headache. New cars, new stores, new everything.

 

Youngmi reached the end of the main road, and at the end of that road was a library. The sign read so, clear as day. So she went inside. In one section were tables with the screens and typewriters she had seen not too long ago. There were many different books, some she knew and plenty she didn’t. What was going on?

 

Having quite enough of being so dreadfully confused she went up to the front desk and asked the woman who sat there what date it was. Because it clearly wasn’t the same one she had left. The woman gave her a funny look but answered her anyways. Youngmi was stunned by what she had heard. There was no way, it couldn’t be, it wasn't possible, right?

 

Youngmi asked for a recent newspaper and the librarian pointed her in the direction of where they were kept. She hastily made her way over and grabbed the paper that was lying on a table. The date at the top confirmed what the woman told her.

 

70 years.

 

70 years it was since she had entered the forest. But it couldn’t be possible, right? What was going on?

 

She ran back up to the librarian and asked where past newspapers kept. Specifically from 70 years ago. The woman told her that they no longer kept old papers since about ten or so years. Instead they were catalogued into the computers. Computer, such a foreign word to Youngmi.

 

The girl asked where she could find a computer, once again receiving a look like she must be stupid. The librarian pointed her in the direction of the tables where the screens with the typewriters sat, and she made her way over.

 

She looked at the strange device, how was she supposed to work it? Youngmi just stood there and stared at it, then sat down in the seat in front of the screen. She continued to stare not knowing what to do.

 

A man peered over at the girl, wondering if she was having trouble with something. He moved over to her and asked if she was having any problems.

 

“I don’t know how to use this,” she managed to say.

 

The man was slightly baffled by what he heard. What young person didn’t know how to work a computer in this day and age. He grabbed a chair and sat next to her, offering to help the girl.

 

Youngmi gratefully nodded, she was glad there was someone nice enough to help. He asked what she needed and she told him the newspapers.

 

“Ah, that one is easy.”

 

He grabbed a device on the table to the right of the flat typewriter. The man decided to show her how to use everything. He opened up the tab with the newspaper catalogue to get her started. He went through everything, from the mouse to the keyboard. And he showed her where to input the information she needed and which things to click on.

 

Youngmi wasn’t confident in using the thing, but still thought she should give it a try. Thanking the man for his help, he simply nodded his head and smiled, then moved on to continue with what he was doing before.

 

The girl then tried out what she now knew was a mouse, a strange name for the thing. She had difficulty with getting it around the screen, the arrow moved much too quickly. She slowly got the hang of it and finally got the arrow to the search bar. Youngmi didn’t know which date to start with, but ended up settling on the day she left.

 

She scrolled down the page and found nothing interesting. She clicked the next button and read through it as well. Still nothing. She tried the date after that and right on the front page was a photo of her with the headline “Missing Girl”. It made sense to her because she had been gone for several days by that time.

 

Youngmi went through page after page. Some had articles that told of the girl being found, but the next day the paper retracted their statement mentioning it was a false lead. She skipped through days, then weeks, and months, and years. The articles of the missing girl had ended after five years.

 

The man that had helped her mentioned that names could also be searched, so that’s what she did.

 

She typed in her father’s name. The first few searches showed the stuff she had already gone through. And at the end of the page was a small snippet from the newspaper, in the obituaries.

 

Right there at the top was her father’s name. And the date posted read that the newspaper had been printed 46 years ago. Her father died at 64 years old. Only 24 years after Youngmi entered the forest.

 

Youngmi screamed and cried, attracting the attention of everyone in the library. The tears poured down her face as she ran out of the building. She didn’t know what to do or where to go. So she ran to the only place she knew, her home.

 

She cried all the way there. And when she landed on her bed she cried there as well.

 

Youngmi didn’t care about the musty smell that emanated throughout the room. She covered herself up with what was left of her blanket and cried. She cried and she cried, until finally she fell asleep.

 

The next day was no different. The tears never seemed to stop as she went through every inch of the house. Images played in her head, memories of her family, of when they were whole.

 

That’s how she spent her days.

 

The girl didn’t eat. Not having the appetite to stomach anything. She felt that if she did eat, it would just come right back up. Although she did manage to get water from the library in town. She would take a jug and fill it up at the water fountains. She also used the water to bathe and wash her clothing with. That’s all she relied on for the days she spent there in the human world.

 

It was nearly 3 weeks since she returned from the forest. She had grown weak from hunger. And when she went into town many of the people pitied the girl. Youngmi was dressed in the same outfit she came through the mirror in. A couple women offered to give her some of their old clothes they no longer wore, but she refused. She even refused food that was brought to her. It didn’t feel right. Receiving things from people she didn’t know, it didn’t feel right.

 

Two months quickly went by. She still had not eaten, she was beginning to grow sick. Weak. She didn’t know what to do anymore.

 

It was on a bright sunny day when the weather was warm and the breeze was cool. A perfect day one might say. A person knocked on the broken down door to Youngmi’s house. The girl answered the door to see a woman, much older than she herself was. The woman asked if she could enter, Youngmi became quite hesitant. Seeing as how the girl seemed uncomfortable with the idea, she then suggested that the two could sit outside.

 

And so the pair sat in the grass in front of Youngmi’s home.

 

Before the woman began speaking, she handed some bread and water to Youngmi, the girl looked as if she could use it. She then introduced herself and started talking about how nice the day was. Youngmi was interested in none of it.

 

But then the woman said something that piqued the girl’s interest.

 

“46 years ago. I don’t know how, I’m quite confused, and maybe you are too,” the woman smiled at the girl, she knew she now had her attention. “This photo, my mother kept it from one of her patients, an old man.”

 

The woman reached into the bag she had been carrying, Youngmi hadn’t noticed it earlier. A picture frame was pulled out, a relatively familiar one. It was then handed over to Youngmi, who then stared at the photo that lay inside. The very one that had been missing from the bottom of the staircase. The photo she had treasured the most.

 

“The girl in the photo, it’s you, right?”

 

Youngmi did not remove her eyes from the photo, and did not answer. But the woman continued on anyways.

 

“I noticed you in town the other day. I was quite surprised, I thought I was hallucinating actually. I couldn’t believe it, you looked just like the girl in that photo. It creeped me out at first, I was sure that I had seen a ghost,” the woman chuckled at the thought, a ghost? Really?

 

“But I saw people talking to you, so obviously you couldn’t be a ghost. And I wasn’t hallucinating. You know, I looked over that picture many times, so much in fact that my husband became rather frustrated with me.” A sigh escaped her lips, and she paused for a few minutes.

 

“I knew it was you though. I don’t understand what’s going on, I really don’t. And I don’t expect you to explain anything. It’s really none of my business. But I knew that I just had to give that to you, it belongs to you, it’s your right to have it, not mine.”

 

The woman heard the girl sniffle and watched as tears rolled down her face. She grabbed a tissue from her bag and handed it Youngmi, which gladly accepted it.

 

Youngmi listened as the woman then rifled through the purse and pulled out a small rectangular box. The cardboard it was made from was falling apart, it was obviously quite old.

 

“This is yours too. I almost forgot about it.”

 

The girl took the box, her hands shaking. She carefully opened it afraid to tear the thing any further. What she found inside was a beautiful gold chain necklace with a charm in the shape of a key. It sparkled in the sunlight, nearly blinding the girl that gazed upon it.

 

“My mother told me about the man she had cared for when she was a nurse. I was nine years old at the time it happened, but she didn’t tell me until years later. She spoke of a sweet and gentle old man. He didn’t talk much, mostly kept to himself. But sometimes he would sit and talk with my mother, mainly about his family. He told stories about how beautiful his wife was and of the tragedy that befell her. He would go on about his daughter, a darling little thing that he so loved.

 

“She would listen to his stories, sometimes crying, sometimes laughing, along with the man who told them. He was her favorite patient, he never put up a fuss.

 

“But it was a warm sunny day, such as this one, some might call it perfect. My mother was making her rounds, checking up on the patients under her care. That man, she said how peaceful he looked as he lay in his bed. She thought he was sleeping, but when she went to wake him up he didn’t even stir. The man had passed away in that hospital bed, he had been sick for a while. He was only in there maybe a couple weeks, I’m not really sure though, I can’t seem to remember that part. But she found the man clutching that necklace.”

 

The tears didn’t stop falling from Youngmi’s eyes. She had been intently listening to the woman’s tale of the old man in the hospital. The sweet and gentle man that so loved his little family. Her father.

 

“My mother kept those things, the photo and necklace. She knew there was no relatives to hand them over to, and they would’ve ended up in the trash had she not taken them home with her. She didn’t know why she decided to keep those things, but she did.

 

“Its been 46 years. Its been a long time, hasn’t it?”

 

Youngmi nodded, afraid to even speak, afraid her voice would not come out.

 

“Your family is gone, it must be really hard for you knowing that. But I think… I believe there’s someone out there, waiting for you. I don’t know who that might be, or where they are. But somewhere in the world is a person waiting. Just waiting to find you.”

 

The woman stood up and reached out her hand for Youngmi to take. She gently pulled the girl up, and before leaving, hugged the girl. She wrapped Youngmi in a tight embrace which was quickly returned. It felt nice being held like that, she hadn’t felt such a thing in a very long time.

 

The woman pulled away and smoothed out Youngmi’s hair. She placed a kiss on the girl’s forehead, giving her a sweet smile that reminded her of her mother. And then the woman left, leaving Youngmi to herself once again.

 

She took a seat on the ground and looked over the things the woman had given her. Her tears had dried up by then. And she was simply tired of crying, it wasn’t going to change a single thing. Her family was gone and only she was left.

 

Youngmi thought about what the woman said to her while eating the bread that had been left.

 

That there was someone out in the world waiting for her. And perhaps there was.

 

Someone waiting.

 

This thought passed through her head many times. Many many times. Someone waiting.

 

And an idea flashed through her mind, it all became so clear. The girl jumped up. There was someone waiting for her, and she knew exactly where to find them.

 

Youngmi ran into the house and grabbed an old bag she once used for school. She stuffed in a few things that held a lot of memories for the girl. She looked down at the box that held the necklace, the one her father bought for her. She put it around her neck and clasped it together. Youngmi felt rejuvenated, like her father placed a spell onto the necklace to maybe one day give her the strength she needed. And then she was off.

 

The girl raced through the town, not caring that she looked like a mad woman to everyone else.

 

Youngmi bolted down the main road dodging people and cars, whatever came in her way. And she ran. Ran and ran and ran. She crossed over the bridge and jumped over a fallen tree.

 

Almost there.

 

She was almost there.

 

At the top of the hill she slowed down to take a quick breather. And off in the distance she could she the tree. The big tree that sat closest to the forest. This time she walked, she didn’t need to run anymore. She was finally there.

 

She strolled up to the tree and placed her hand on the giant thing. It brought her back to that day, where she went to read the book she had been looking forward to that entire morning. Though the book was longer laying there under that tree, the memories still remained.

 

Youngmi saw something out of the corner of her eye, she didn’t have to look to know what…who it was.

 

The girl turned away from the tree and walked up to bright purple light. Sanha.

 

The woman had been right. There was someone waiting for her.

 

And so she followed the light into the tunnel made of trees, which beautifully braided together.

 

She was going home.

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mizuchandess
#1
Chapter 10: awww this is so nice <3
sihuilurvskpop
#2
Chapter 10: Aw this is quite heartwarming
And binnie is so selfish ugh
OkSooyeon #3
Chapter 10: This story is nice even though it is only a few chapters. Be more confident in your writings author-nim! It is good!