Mark knew he was strong and that was the reason why he had to be the person to take care of others. For years now he has always been a listening ear to a person who needs it.

A quiet support pillar.

And that was what he does best.

Listening.

Everyone was good at something and he was good at listening.

He would listen with a soft smile on his lips as Younjae excitedly explained how easily Coco was making new friends at the nearby park and how great the strawberry ice-cream was. Way better than the pistachio one that's for sure. Youngjae would often rave about the greatness of the current game he obsessed about. How he had played the game through the night and still couldn't level up. Younjae could find joy in the simplest things in life and spread it around to light up other people's lives as well. He wasn't called the group's sunshine otter for nothing.

He would listen in amusement as Bambam tried to teach him all the newest trends trending the social media with exaggerated hand movements. Bambam could count on Mark to always be ready to join in the fun. Whether it was dapping, running man challenge or mannequin challenge, you name it, he was in. Although, Mark didn't always give in to the younger's antics. At times, he would tease the younger with well situated judgmental looks, just for fun. However, whenever Bambam came to him with deep worries that sagged his shoulders down, Mark would do his best to make the younger feel better. To make the younger smile that cute baby smile of his (which only lasted until Bambam stepped out of the door of their apartment and the cute smile Mark adores so much transforms into arrogant "Celebrity" smirk.)

Mark would listen fondly as Yugyeom ranted animatedly about this new Chris Brown song that was the It-song for life. Yugyeom made it his life’s mission to listen to the song till grave and beyond. Mark would internally laugh at how high and baby-like Yugyeom's voice changed the more excited he got. No matter how big and mature the giant maknae looked, he would always be their baby. Mark would watch Yugyeom dance to the song, loving how absorbed the younger always gets when doing something he truly enjoyed.

Jaebum on the other hand was a tough cookie to crack. He was too prideful to confine in anyone. He put up a strong front in front of everybody. He would carry all his leader responsibilities and the burden's that came with it all on his own. Sometimes it looked like he carried the whole world on his shoulders. Sometimes Jaebum looked like he needed a pair of helping hands. Sometimes he would turn to Mark -as he felt more comfortable confining in the eldest member than the younger members- to ease a bit of the burdens from his shoulders. It didn't happen often, but the smile on Jaebum's face afterwards told Mark that he knew he could turn to Mark whenever things got too tough to handle alone.

On the contrary, Jinyoung -despite seeming like the person to hardly voice out his worries- would come to Mark as often as he was feeling down. Mark and Jinyoung had grown close over the years and made a habit of sometimes hiding in Jinyoung's room to have heart-to-hearts. Jinyoung felt free to talk about anything, because he knew whatever he told Mark wouldn't leave their bubble of secrets. However, most often than not the topic would be Jinyoung's insecurities and fears. And that saddened Mark enormously. Jinyoung after all was Jack-of-all-traits. He was good at everything he tried. Anyone who had eyes could see that he was born to be something great. So it was sad to see that Jinyoung himself couldn't see that. So Mark in his own quiet way did his best to reassure Jinyoung that he was born a star. In his own way he did his best to help Jinyoung built up his self-confidence.

Mark would listen to everyone and take care of others in his silent ways. But he himself was not good at sharing.

He didn't express his feelings that easily. He would keep his hardships close to his heart. The heavier the burden, closer to the heart it was. Deep inside of him churning in his stomach, closed behind sealed lips. Locked in so deep they never saw the light of day. Accumulating slowly, hurting him gradually, weighting down deep inside him.

He didn't want to bother others with his problems. They already had their own share of problems without him adding his into the mix. It was that at first. It truly was.

But with time, the thought of not wanting to burden slowly transformed into they wouldn't care.

And as time went by he felt like being a good listener wasn't good enough anymore.

Was he ever even a good listener? Did he think too highly of himself?

He knew he was replaceable but acknowledging it was difficult.

In the group, the members always told him that he was the visual of GOT7. That he didn't need to do anything except for just stand still and would still attract people like moth to a flame. With his looks, girls and boys alike would get pulled in as if he was a magnet. He could make people swoon at his feet effortlessly by just existing. Everything he did looked captivating, bewitching and charming thanks to his visuals.

At first, he was uncomfortable with all the praise as he was not used to it. And couldn't understand it. When he looked in the mirror, he couldn't see what others claimed to see. What he saw was dark brown eyes, slightly curved nose, pinkish lips with a pale complexion. A normal average face. Nothing special except for his face might be a little on the small side? But he didn't know if that was good or not. So he tried not to take the compliments to his heart and just took them as what they were, words. Mere words with no deeper meaning than to make him feel flattered. Words uttered to , to embarrass him. Words that held no grain of truth behind them. Just mere words.

Over the course of time, there were less compliments about his handsomeness as the flattery gradually shifted to other members. They began to compliment other members on being especially good looking on that particular day or another member on matching the specific concept the best. Mark didn't think much of it. He understood that the other members needed praising on their looks as well. And they truly deserved it too, since they were all so good looking in their own unique ways. He felt like this was better. He was relieved actually. He didn't feel uncomfortable anymore, as he wasn't receiving any more compliments. Moreover he was happy to praise other members because he felt like the compliments weren't just compliments, just flattery, they were true.

After some time, though, he started to wonder if the members stopped complimenting on his looks because now they finally saw how he truly looked.

How he sees himself.

If looks were his defining character to the outside world, what was he now that he no longer had it? If he ever had it to begin with.

What was his role in the group now that he wasn't the visual anymore?

Surprisingly it hurt him too much to think about, so he didn't.

He just let it be.

Jackson and Mark used to be inseparable. Where there was Jackson, there was Mark and vice versa. Jackson took care of Mark as Mark took care of Jackson. When they heard they were going to be debuting in the same group as Got7, they were ecstatic. They would be together with 5 other kids but most importantly they would still be together. And they would still be inseparable. They wouldn't let anything get in between them.

They were Jackson and Mark.

Mark and Jackson.

A packet deal.

You wouldn't get one without the other.

Despite their differences, they worked great together. Because rather than let their differences get the better of them, they complemented each other instead. They made up for the things the other was lacking. They provided each other safety and assurance.

Jackson was extremely outgoing while in contrast, Mark was an introvert. Jackson made friends easily, and why wouldn't he. He was charismatic and alluring, he knew how to draw people towards himself effortlessly. He was self-confident and knew how to carry himself. He was a master of social situations. A magician. Always ready for any situation thrown his way.

At first glance, one could mistake him as a cocky, self-centered, overly naïve maybe borderline stupid and fake. But if one looked a bit longer, a bit closer, one would notice how genuine Jackson truly was.

Jackson was the type to put others before himself. He feels others' problems as his own and thrives on making others feel good. Feel better. You would always feel better with Jackson.

But due to this selflessness of him, he at times spreads himself too thin for people not worth his care. He would hold someone dear, think of them as his good friend, and then later find out that the feeling was not reciprocated. Which left him feeling hurt and insecure.

Yes, even though Jackson seems like the type with overflowing self-confidence, and it is true at times, but that self-confidence is very fluctuating. Sometimes it would skyrocket reaching the skies, other times it goes plummeting down under the ground.

Since Jackson is a hilarious guy, he has a habit of making fun of himself, making everyone burst out laughing at the ridiculousness of the joke. Everyone who had eyes could see how gorgeous Jackson was. And he would only get better over the years, his boyish features replaced by masculinity. Little did others know, the jokes in all their ridiculousness, held a grain of truth in them. The source for the jokes came from his insecurities.

At times like these, when Jackson's doubts were eating him alive, when he was hurt by the world, Mark was there as always, assuring Jackson of his worth, reminding him that he was appreciated, that he was important, and most importantly that he was enough. More than enough. He was perfect the way he was.

On occasion when Jackson needed Mark, Mark didn't need to utter a single word. Just his presence was soothing enough. Jackson, at those times, just needed Mark to be beside him, to know that he wasn't alone.

Truth to be told, Mark wasn't a master with words. Not that he didn't know what to say. He just felt like action held more meaning than words ever could. Mark was the type of person, who values truth and honesty. He has, in the past, hurt his share of people by bluntly stating the truth, even in situations where a little white lie would have been better. So he has learned how words can hurt people. He doesn't want to be judged by a single wrong thing he has said. So rather than speaking freely, he holds his words inside, thinking them through a couple of times before saying them out loud. Due to this, he finds himself stuck in his own head more than not. Over analyzing situations, so much that he sometimes gets lost, takes things out of their proportions, increasing the threshold of speaking or of action. Missing the opportunity to do either. Silently tortured by his own mind. At times like these, which happens quite often, Jackson was there to help him put things into perspective again.

Jackson despite being loud and obnoxious, is very perceptive of others, he can read people and pick up on a mood very easily, and act accordingly. This was his secret for slaying every social situations at hand. And this was the reason, he understood what Mark needed without being told. This was why there were so close. This was why they needed each other. This was why they wanted to stay together.

Together. That was what Mark truly believed, once upon a time.

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It felt like Jackson was drifting away from him. It felt like they were hardly ever just the two of them anymore and when it was just two of them it felt like Jackson wasn't really there. It felt like mentally Jackson was far away from where Mark could no longer reach him. Jackson didn't put any effort when it came to Mark. It felt like he didn't care anymore.

Mark was feeling lonelier without Jackson these days but the worst was the fact that he felt the loneliest when he actually was with Jackson.

Nowadays if one were to ask Mark where Jackson was, Mark simply couldn't answer the question.

It was no longer Mark and Jackson. Markson. Now it was just Mark. A lone Mark secretly waiting for Jackson. Never really getting what he wanted. Even though he himself didn't know what it was that he wanted. He just knew that he missed Jackson the most when Jackson was sitting right next to him a mere centimeter between them.

He was scared. So scared that he was being left behind.

He felt a longing in his heart. He could feel the switch in Jackson's attitude towards him. The difference was too drastic. So drastic that he sometimes wondered if he had imagined their past. The closeness and belonging he felt at the time was only a distant memory now. A hazy sweet memory when everything was still good. He doesn't even remember when the change happened. Maybe it was a little by little over time.

When they met the other 5 boys he did notice how fast Jackson befriended them. Ofcourse he noticed. How could he not. It’s difficult not to get close to Jackson. Ofcourse Mark also grew close with the other boys. And he was happy for all of them. They were a family he chose. He didn't feel insecure nor scared that Jackson was getting closer and closer to the other boys day by day. No, the thought didn't even cross his mind. Because what Mark had with Jackson didn't come so easily. He knew how important he was to Jackson, and didn't question it. Even though Jackson was close with all the other members it didn't take away any affection reserved for him. As his closeness to other members didn't hinder the fondness he had towards Jackson.

And it was true. At the time. Long ago.

In the past, they were extremely close with all members but they always had time for each other. And if they didn't, they would always make an effort to make time. On occasions they would go out to have a special outing just the two of them.

They talked about everything and nothing at all. Mark was quiet compared to most but Jackson never minded. In what Mark didn't voice out, he replaced with action. With a calming touch or a soothing . And it was fine, Jackson never run out of things to say. Especially when it came to Mark.

But everything changes with time.

As time passed by Jackson started joking how it was like talking to a wall when he was talking with Mark.

Later he started joking how they're not close at all.

It became one of Jackson’s favorite jokes. Ones that he would crack with every given opportunity. Especially in the interviews with the questions concerning Mark. Like he did yet again in this very interview they were sitting at.

Mark didn't want admit it but the jokes did disturb him, as those were the things he was having doubts about.

Was these the kind of jokes that hid a shred of truth behind them?

Did Jackson really feel like talking to him was pointless?

Did Jackson not feel that they were close anymore?

Truth to be told the change was beginning then. Maybe even before.

Were they close anymore?

When was the last time they hung out just the two of them? He really couldn't remember.

Did Mark's silence bother Jackson that much? No it can't be. Jackson had said it was one of the things he liked about Mark, when Mark was confiding in Jackson about silence being one of his biggest insecurities.

Sitting there in the middle of the interview, tortured by his insecurities, being eaten alive by his thoughts with the sound of laughter of his loved ones echoing in his mind. His loved ones laughing at the jokes based on his biggest insecurity, made by his trusted one. The person he cared the most about. The person who he needed right now. The person who for the first time failed to notice his distress.

Mark didn't want to admit it, but maybe talking to him was like talking to a wall. Isn't it why, it was so funny?

Mark didn't want to admit it, but maybe they weren't close anymore. Maybe they never were as close as he thought.

Mark didn't want to admit it, but it hurt.

It hurt so badly.

But it was fine.

He was alright.

It was fine.

It was the truth anyway wasn't it? You can't force the facts to bend how you want. He would just have to come to terms with it.

Mark knew he was strong. And that was the reason why he had to be the person to take care of others. But just this once, can he be the person to be taken care of?