2 yrs. 5 mon. 1 days. 6 hrs. 22 min. 1 sec.

There’s something surreal about a group of people littered around the oval wearing white robes and with red eyes. There’s something surreal about the friends and family onlookers, grinning at each other and at strangers, just so happy to be here.

And there’s most certainly something dreamy about Nayoung’s eyes, twinkling with tears and bright with happiness. Sejeong struts towards her smugly, holding her diploma up arrogantly. “Guess who just graduated?” she asks.

Nayoung smiles back, shrugging and raising her own diploma. “I don’t know, let’s ask Haebin!”

“I know the answer’s not me!” Haebin exclaims from a few steps away, eyes glaring but lips smiling. “Congratulations, guys.”

“That’s four of us in one day,” Sojin interjects, holding her own diploma in one hand and Hana in the other. “Congratulations are definitely in order.”

And then Mina yells ‘group hug’ and pulls the two nearest to her (Mimi and Hyeyeon) in a hug, the other two pulling another two with them, and so on until there’s nine of them in a tight hug with Mina unsurprisingly making it in the middle with Hyeyeon and the others smothering them with cheeks kisses and pinching fingers.

After a good few minutes, Mimi exclaims she can’t breathe and Hyeyeon accidentally punches Haebin in the face and they all break free, hysterically laughing at the reddening of Haebin’s cheek and Hyeyeon’s amused apologies.

Nayoung pulls her away as Hana tries to get some first aid kit from Hakyeon (“Why would Hakyeon have a first aid kit?” “He’s Hakyeon, does he need reason?”) and the look on Nayoung’s eyes is solemn. It terrifies Sejeong.

“I… congratulate you, Sejeong,” she says awkwardly, rubbing the back of her neck and looking at anything but Sejeong. “I’ll mail you my graduation gift, I promise.”

“Mail?” She repeats, eyes widening and lips curling downwards. “Nayoung, why don’t you just bring it yourself?”

“Well…”

Fear creeps in. Nayoung’s eyes still waver. Sejeong knows Nayoung like the words to her favorite song, she knows every expression that passes through the girl’s face and what each and every tone of voice might mean

She heard this voice and saw this face only once – that time Nayoung had to go on a business trip with her parents and wasn’t able to be with Sejeong on her birthday. It was the first time they were apart for any of their birthdays since they met.

And before she can even think, Sejeong’s already reaching out and smothering Nayoung in a bone crushing hug. She wants to say ‘please don’t leave me,’ but it comes out as “I love you, Nayoung.”

“Yeah, I-“ her breath hitches, body tenses, “back to you, Sejeong.”

They stay like that, swaying each other in their own arms and staring at the world behind each back. Mimi sends Sejeong a tight lipped smile from behind, and Haebin mutters something to Mimi, and nods at whatever Mimi muttered back.

Her arms are tight around Nayoung’s torso, circling her completely and fingers digging on her own arms as her head fit snugly in the space between Nayoung’s ear and shoulder. Nayoung’s arms are around her shoulder, right hand cradling her head and the other rubbing circles on her shoulder, her cheek resting against her head.

And they sway. And sway. And sway. And Nayoung’s voice from that night fills Sejeong’s mind ~we were sat upon our best friend’s roof, I had my arms around you, watching the sunrise replace the moon~ over and over again.

When they finally pull away, there are tears in Nayoung’s eyes and she’s smiling sadly. “Do you trust me, Sejeong?”

“More than anyone else in the world.”

“I know.” She reaches forward, plants a kiss on Sejeong’s forehead. Then she turns away. “I got to go.” And then she’s running to their group of friends to say goodbye and then to their family car where her mother is smiling softly at Sejeong.

Sejeong runs after her.

She stops right beside the car, finds Nayoung crying onto her palm, and taps on the window. Nayoung looks up with red rimmed eyes and rolls down the window. “Yeah?”

“Can I ask you a favor?”

“Anything for you.”

She smiles. “Promise me you’ll come to my house to give me my gift?”

Nayoung blinks, meeting her mother’s eyes through the rearview mirror. Then she shrugs, smiles at Sejeong. “I promise.”

//

2 yrs. 4 mon. 21 days. 6 hrs. 11 min. 5 sec.

She gets the graduation gift after a week. But no Nayoung. Her mother tells her Nayoung dropped it off and was in a hurry to leave. She thanks her mother and runs up to her room to text Nayoung a series of curses and questions and accusations before ripping the bow off the huge box and opening it.

Inside is a huge jar with whole lot of folded stars, and a note on top: For each day I’m not with you, a thought, and idea, a memory, a message. I am so sorry. But I promise we’ll meet again. Love, Nayoung.

She crumples the note, throws it away. Then, in a blur of an ache filled moment, she scatters the stars across the floor and thrashes them around, anger in her eyes and tears in her heart.

//

2 yrs. 4 mon. 21 days. 5 hrs. 58 min.

As she wipes away her tears, she half-heartedly takes one crushed star from the floor and opens it. The backside has little drawings of the planets in order and Sejeong’s heart aches as she remembers Nayoung’s adoration for outer space.

I don’t know how I’ll ever survive without your laugh. Please, keep laughing. Remember that time I fell off a horse and landed on mud? Laugh about it.

Sejeong doesn’t laugh, only chuckles. Her heart feels too heavy for a laugh, side too cold for a laugh. But she does sigh, take all stars to smoothen them and put them back in the jar, and holds on to Nayoung’s promise of meeting again.

//

2 yrs. 3 mon. 15 days. 21 hrs. 3 min.

“One star per day, young apprentice,” one note said. And Sejeong almost doesn’t reach in for another - valid - star.

Almost.

“Watch more movies! I know you hate them, but they’re amazing.”

She gets up, walks to her closet, and takes out the box of important things and gifts she has. Inside, taped to the underside of the lid, is that post it with the list of movies Nayoung wrote for her.

Sejeong spends the night cuddling her pillows and watching the movies on her laptop, the only source of light in the room.

She cries during the sad parts, and cries during the heartwarming ones. She cries during the funny parts, too, because she’s only half paying attention and what’s making her cry is Nayoung’s laugh in her head every time the punchline is said.

//

2 yrs. 1 mon. 4 days. 5 hrs. 3 sec.

She meets Chungha at the gym she works out at. Chungha is sensitive and sometimes amusing and helped Sejeong out with the equipment. Chungha is no Nayoung, but Chungha doesn’t have to be. Chungha is Chungha, and Sejeong doesn’t think it’ll be that bad if she gave it a chance.

Mimi, the only one she talks to regularly out of the group these days, sighs and tells her no matter what happens it’ll be worth it in the end. She sighs and tells her that maybe Chungha’s the Band-Aid big enough to cover half of the scars Nayoung left behind. She sighs and tells Sejeong to try it out. It’ll all work out in the end. Because if Chungha’s not her soulmate, then Chungha will understand anyway.

They all should.

She says yes to a date.

(She refuses to admit that it isn’t Mimi who coerces her into going on a date but Nayoung’s note: “Fall in love, because falling in love is beautiful. Tell me about it when I get back, and I’ll give them the best friend talk.”)

//

1 yr. 8 mon. 10 days. 3 hrs.

One star a day turned to three, and turned to five. And turned to all the stars in one sitting as she tries to keep her tears from falling and smudging the ink.

One particular star hits too hard, slices her heart. And she cries, tears smudging the ink, but the words are already carved behind her eyelids to haunt her every time she closes her eyes.

“I will always miss and love you.”

//

1 yr. 5 mon. 1 days. 6 hrs. 22 min. 1 sec.

“So, you never talked to Nayoung since?” Hana asks, pinching the straw of her drink as she stares into Sejeong’s eyes. “Like, not once?”

Sejeong shakes her head sadly. She takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly, something she always does to stop her heart from feeling too much. She shrugs. “I guess our fates together stopped when we graduated, you know?”

The older woman chuckles, shakes her head, and barely stops herself from blurting out an insult. Instead, she fakes an agreement, “Yeah, sure.”

“That can’t be true though,” Mimi, who kept quiet the whole time, suddenly speaks. “You were soul sisters.”

“She’s probably really happy with her soulmate now.” Sejeong laughs, bitterness trying hard not to ooze out. “She doesn’t need a soul sister.”

Mimi scoffs, offended. “Hana’s soulmate is Sojin, but she still needs her soul sister.” She nudges Hana, waiting for her to agree. But the girl doesn’t, and is instead smiling at her phone. Mimi groans. “Is it your girlfriend?”

“Fiancée,” Hana corrects, eyes still on her phone. The two other occupants of the table stare bewildered at her.

Sejeong is first to get over the shock. She leans forward, pushes Hana’s forehead, and asks, “Fiancee?”

“Yeah? Didn’t we tell you already? I’m pretty sure we did. We told Mina and Hyeyeon.”

Her stare hardens, turns into a glare. Her best friends are getting married, engaged, and not one of them told her. She turns to Mimi. “Hey, soul sister. This girl ever told you she was engaged?”

“Uh,” is all Mimi could say, but it’s evident in her face that she wasn’t informed.

Sejeong faces Hana again. “How can you not tell us?”

“It happened last week, it’s not like we already got married!” Hana shoots back, raising her eyebrows defensively. “Besides, you guys are too busy these days. We planned this date, like, three weeks prior.”

“You didn’t tell Mimi. Your best friend since childhood.”

Hana’s shoulders droop and her face softens. She looks at an awkward looking Mimi picking on her food. She knocks their shoulders together and smiles. “Hey.”

“Hm?”

“I’m sorry.” She moves her head so she’s laying it on the table and looking up at Mimi. Sejeong, the onlooker, snorts. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.”

“She should’ve been the first person you screamed at about the news,” Sejeong says, eggs. She keeps her face stone cold, and her gaze concernedly on Mimi.

“I know.” Hana sighs, guilt filling the air.

“It’s okay,” says Mimi, finally looking up and smiling at Hana. She opens , then closes it again after a pause. Then, she says “It’s okay,” again like she’s trying to reassure everyone in the table - including herself - that it’s okay.

Hana’s eyes soften some more, turning sad. “You sure?”

“Yup.” Mimi smiles, bright and shiny and fake. She looks at Sejeong in unsaid begging.

Sejeong nods discreetly, then turns to Hana. “Congratulations, Hana, but I’m going home. I need to finish some things for work that I haven’t even started yet.”

“I’m going home, too,” Mimi announces, standing up before Sejeong can. “I forgot I had to finish something too. I guess we really are too busy these days, huh?”

Hana looks crushed, but she nods anyway and watches them leave the coffee shop, muttering to each other. Then she faces the table once more, two unfinished cakes sitting dejectedly on top of it. She sighs, disturbed by the fact that Mimi didn’t congratulate her, and finishes her own cake.

//

1 yr. 3 mon. 12 days. 4 hrs. 1 min. 44 sec.

Sejeong’s toeing dangerous territory. Chungha’s amazing. She’d make a perfect lover - is a perfect lover. Everything about her’s so easy and nice. But- Nayoung. Nayoung’s coming back. Nayoung will be back. What will she do then, when Nayoung’s back and she already dragged Chungha along with her?

She expresses her concern to Mimi. Mimi grumbles, heaves an exasperated sigh, and throws her hands up in the air, exclaiming “Goddamn it, Sejeong. Nayoung’s practically a ghost now. No one knows where she is, no one heard from her. Will you let her go? Love doesn’t work in our world. Fate does. Love isn’t strong enough against fate.”

There’s newfound hatred in Mimi’s eyes. Newfound pessimism and annoyance. Sejeong thinks it might be because of the news of the engagement, but she doesn’t voice this out loud. She knows Mimi’s right. There are soulmates for a reason, and love isn’t strong enough against that big of a reason.

She exchanges apartment keys with Chungha.

//

9 mon. 5 days. 7 hrs. 3 min. 49 sec.

She’s walking around the mall with Hyeyeon and Mina when they come across a tattoo shop. Sejeong looks down at her wrist and the numbers glare back. It:s there, right ing there, and Nayoung isn’t.

She drags the two hesitant girls inside and asks for a tattoo on her wrist. The first artist frowns, says it’s wrong to put ink on such important space. But the other guy, one who has ink on his wrist, takes her and works on her wrist.

The designs are mostly too dull, and Sejeong’s not willing to have such dull drawings on her skin for the rest of her life. She flips the page once and her haze lands on one design she likes.

She points to it. Hyeyeon and Mina exchange sad knowing looks. And the artist draws on her wrist.

//

8 mon. 28 days. 11 hrs. 45 min. 22 sec.

Haebin reprimands her about how disrespectful it is to have a tattoo over her countdown. Hana grumbles about how she’ll regret it in a few years. Mina hugs Sejeong from the side, nestling her head over Sejeong’s shoulder.

Mimi grabs her hand, stares at her wrist, and mutters, “I remember someone who’s a space geek.”

The others hush down, stare at the design. And a silent ‘oh’ echoes around the room. A silent understanding.

Mina tightens her hold around Sejeong’s torso and Sejeong leans her head on top of the younger’s.

//

5 mon. 10 hrs. 33 min. 59 sec.

She eyes Mimi, one eyebrow raising higher than the other as she takes in the bags under her eyes, her chapped lips, tear stains on her cheeks, scowl on her eyebrows, and the pain in her eyes. She scoffs. “You’re a mess.”

“Thanks for pointing that out,” Mimi snarks, eyebrows dipping lower. “I was hoping someone would, really. I was hoping someone would see just how ing miserable I looked, Sejeong. Thank you so ing much.”

She opens to say a half-assed apology but Mimi continues.

“Like, when Hana and Sojin came to visit and saw me on the brink of breaking down and didn’t even notice how horrible I looked, I was devastated. How dare they not notice when I have been trying so hard to make them?” she asks, sarcasm dripping from her tone. But her eyes give her away, new tears forming and the sides reddening. “How dare they not see?”

A sigh escapes her lips, heart dropping at Mimi’s voice turning into merely a whisper. She drops her bag on the floor and dives on the couch next to her, taking her in her arms. She thinks she says words of encouragement, lies like ‘you’ll get over it’. And she thinks Mimi replied to each one with a snort, a sardonic response, maybe even a humorless laugh. But all she knows for sure is that Mimi shook in her arms, sobbing on her neck, and she shook along with her. Because it if she didn’t feel the same.

Sure, Nayoung left. Left after graduation without an explanation like she’s goddamn Rancho from Three Idiots. Nothing since then. No hi, no hello. No news.

But, god damn it, she still has the same effect on Sejeong.

She thinks it takes a few minutes. The ache in her arm from Mimi’s weight pressing onto it tells her it takes at least an hour. But she detaches herself from Mimi and pops in a random CD from Mimi’s collection in the player, and lets it play as Mimi weeps. She finds out it’s actually a video from Mimi’s childhood, finds Hongbin’s smile covering the view before the camera pans to a Hana about to hit a grinning Mimi.

And then video-Mimi cries, and it’s almost exactly like adult Mimi’s cries. It’s almost funny. Hilarious. But she doesn’t laugh. That is, until she realizes it’s Hana’s fault, too, in the video. And there’s snot crawling down video-Mimi’s face and then disappearing in her nose, then crawling out again as she lets out a long wail.

That makes her laugh, tears in her eyes of laughter and not of sorrow. Mimi sends her a menacing glare, but her lips also twitch in laughter. Shaking her head, she walks in the kitchen to make themselves some sandwiches.

Just as she’s spreading melted chocolate on the bread (because Mimi always forgets to buy spread but never chocolate chips and she has her own chocolate melter that’s really small but very efficient and she takes more care of than herself), she hears Mimi let out a loud, strangled gasp.

“Oh my god,” she hears Mimi mutter from the living room as she makes themselves some sandwiches. “Oh god, oh ing- oh . God, oh my god. How the - how did- what the ? Oh my god.”

Rolling her eyes, Sejeong walks back in the living room. “You called me?”

“God,” Mimi breathes out, wide eyes staring at the TV.

“I’m here,” Sejeong replies, once again rolling her eyes. She plops down the couch and nudges Mimi’s shoulder. “What?”

Still hyperventilating, Mimi grabs the remote and rewinds the video, pushing Sejeong’s cheeks so she’s staring at the screen. “Watch.”

Again, Hongbin’s shiny white buck teeth (with some chocolate in between, and Sejeong snorts at that) fills the screen, his sound laugh vibrating through the speakers. Then, the camera pans to Mimi behind him, playing with a pink elephant. Hana stood behind her, mischievous grin on her face, and she was raising a pillow (one that Sejeong saw multiple times in her room, she’ll have to about that later).

With one strong and swift motion, she pulled it down and let it smack Mimi on top of her head. Which, of course, made the cry baby cry.

A new, motherly voice echoes from the speaker. “Hana! Go on and say sorry to Mimi, right now!”

Hana looked up, tears welling in her own eyes from being yelled at. She looked down at Mimi, lips trembling, and hugged her from behind. “I’m sorry,” she kept saying on and on, but Mimi kept crying. By this time, Hongbin had already sat beside them, holding Mimi’s hand and patting it affectionately.

“I said I’m sorry,” Hana said, pouting and looking up behind the camera.

“Tell her you love her,” said the motherly voice.

Sejeong’s breath is caught in , mind whirling with the impossible. It can’t be… can it?

Hana looked back down at Mimi and tightened her hug. “I’m really sorry, Mimi. I love you.”

And, oh god, Mimi cried harder, jerking her hand away from Hongbin and holding her wrist against her heart. Her cheeks turned red and Hongbin stared, mildly afraid. Hana pulled away momentarily, but took her hand kissed it. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry. Don’t cry.” She raised her hand, wiping Mimi’s tears. “Please don’t cry. Come on, let’s play. Please don’t cry.”

Hongbin stared, like he’s trying to figure out if he should egg the fight or help comfort Mimi. After a moment, he hugged Mimi from the other side and prodded her to stand.

The screen goes black and she swivels to find Adult Mimi, real life Mimi - shocked Mimi, holding the remote and staring at the screen.

“Oh god,” Sejeong mutters. She looks back at the blank screen, blinking rapidly as if that would make everything she saw disappear. Or, well, at least make everything that made this whole thing a mess disappear. “What are you going to-” she stops, freezes. Mimi’s on her phone, pacing back and forth. “Mimi!”

“What?” comes her annoyed reply. She’s waited for this all her life, for this miracle to happen, even though she wasn’t even sure - wasn’t ever aware - this was a possibility. Sejeong knows about that one little nagging voice in the head that tries to give you hope when all hope is lost.

She has that little voice in her head. But… what Mimi’s about to do will- well, Sejeong doesn’t know what it’ll bring. But no rainbows nor unicorns.

Heartbreaks, maybe. Confusion, obviously. A drift in their group’s friends, probably.

“You can’t just call her!” She manages to say, yell. And Mimi almost flinches, but she stands her ground and glares back. “Mimi, I’m serious-”

“If you suddenly found out Nayoung was your soulmate, would you stay where you are and wait or will you catch the next flight to wherever the she is and kiss her?” Mimi screams back, sadness overcame with impatience in her eyes. She mutters curse words as the usual ‘cannot be reached’ rings from her phone. Then dials again. “I bet you a bucket of fried chicken it’s the latter.”

She doesn’t even mull the weird bet over, just replies - out of defense. “But…” it is the latter. She blinks, tries not to hope such a thing can happen to her too. “But Hana thinks Sojin’s her soulmate. Sojin thinks Hana’s her soulmate. They’re- they’re, you know.” She rolls her eyes, exasperated, throwing her hands up in defeat. “Soulmates.”

Mimi falters, hand on her phone turning limp. She takes a deep breath, lets it out in a sigh, and redials Hana’s number. “But-”

“What if that wasn’t you, you know, finding your soulmate. What if Hongbin just slapped you way too hard and-?”

“Then… then I’d have to slap Hongbin back. For revenge,” she says it like she wants it to be funny. But her tone isn’t light. It’s scared. Because no one should be that lucky. “But I have to at least tell her I love her.”

“Mimi…”

Mimi’s eyes widen and Sejeong hears Hana’s voice from the phone. “Hana!” She all but shouts, making Hana curse from the other end. “I just- I’m sorry. Um, are you- are you busy? ...Oh, yeah. Of course. Wedding plans.” She inhales sharply, making Sejeong’s eyes tear. “Um, I just- it’s stupid- no, no, hear me out. I swear I’m not- this isn’t a prank call.” She rolls her eyes almost adoringly. “Um, I was watching some old videos… from kindergarten. Yeah! Hongbin was there, too. And you-”

She freezes, eyes unfocused on Sejeong - so damn scared. “I mean…”

Sejeong shrugs, as if it could tell her “You started it, finish it”. And from the way Mimi blinks, the way she straightened her back and took a deep breath, ignoring Hana’s impatient voice from the other side, Sejeong knows the unsaid was heard.

“I think you’re my soulmate.”

It was fast. Too fast. And Sejeong’s almost worried Hana didn’t hear. But she half-screamed a ‘what?!’ and Mimi repeats it, voice trembling. Sejeong rolls her eyes, and she knows Hana’s rolling hers, too.

Mimi finally sets her phone on speaker. And Hana’s curses bounce off the walls. “-you said this wasn’t a prank call. You said this is important-”

“I didn’t.”

“-you ing said I wouldn’t be wasting my time and I should listen to you instead of tasting the wedding cake samples-”

“I… didn’t.”

“-and then you go around making jokes and- you know what? You’re a child. You’re a ing child, Jung Mimi. And at most times, I may have found you adorable and laughed, but not right now, I’m bu-”

“I love you.”

“-Ow! What the… ?”

Sejeong leans closer, staring at the screen of Mimi’s phone. She almost snorts at Hana’s name - Stupid and then all the heart emojis one can find. Mimi finds her staring and blushes. “She added… she added the hearts.”

Sejeong rolls her eyes, not needing an explanation.

“Who are you talking to?”

Her eyebrows raise to her hairline. Sejeong knows that tone too well. It’s Hana’s jealous voice, the one Sejeong has only heard her use against Sojin whenever she’s talking to Xiening.

“Um… Sejeong.”

“I- god. Meet me.”

Before Hana can hang up, Mimi asks - almost yells - a “where?”

To which Hana replies with a disgruntled and high “You know where!”

Then the screen goes back to Mimi’s wallpaper - a picture of her and Hana from that time they went to see the cherry blossoms in Japan just because it’s called Hanami, Sejeong snorts at that.

“What was that?” Mimi asks her, eyebrows drawn together. She pulls her phone away abruptly – sheepishly - though, and slips it in her back pocket. “What- what… what happened?”

“Booty call,” Sejeong answers easily, walking backwards to Mimi’s couch and falling back to lie on it. She stares at the ceiling, million things running around her head.

Did Hana’s countdown fade? How can it fade again when it already faded when Sojin said I love you to her?

“Do I- do I come meet her?”

She nods, grunts a yes.

How will this affect their group? Oh god, the wedding. Shame, Mina and Hyeyeon were so dead set on being the flower girl and ring bearer respectively.

“You okay here? Alone? While I go talk to Hana and sort this out?”

“Yeah, I made sandwiches.”

Who’s Sojin’s soulmate then? And why did her countdown fade when Hana sent her a text saying those three damned words?

“I- okay. Thanks, by the way. For everything.”

“Sure. Good luck with that, Mimi.”

The door opens, slams close. And Sejeong’s still staring at the ceiling.

Good for mimi.

She can’t help but be jealous. How ing lucky Mimi is.

“Nayoung,” she mutters, tasting the name on her lips. It’s been so long since she said that. God it still hurts so much.

Will I ever be as lucky?

//

2 mon. 25 days.

Sejeong has been spending more and more time with Chungha. It’s getting way too serious. And maybe Chungha is nowhere near being Nayoung, but Chungha’s warm and soft and comfortable anyway. Chungha’s okay. Chungha is easy. Everything’s easy. Chungha is perfect and caring and just- she’s there. She doesn’t leave with no notes other than the stupid jar of stars that Sejeong has went through ten times already.

(Nayoung, on the other hand, is every superlative mixed into one. Nayoung is red hot flames Sejeong’s skin and leaving third degree burns and Sejeong asking for more contact. Nayoung is hurt and comfort, Nayoung is a storm and the blanket hugging Sejeong protectively during it. Chungha’s okay, but Nayoung’s so much more.)

//

2 mon. 20 days. 8 hrs. 34 min.

It goddamn turned into rainbows and unicorns. Or at least from the way Xiening’s grinning from ear to ear Haebin might as well have told her unicorns exist, and from the way Hana’s looking at Mimi she might as well be shooting her rainbows of love.

“So… you changed everything and made it into a… um….” she tilts her head, confused about all the absurdity. “A- a double wedding?”

Mimi grins, nodding her head enthusiastically. Hana rolls her eyes and grabs her cheeks, turning her face so she can kiss her puckered lips.

Haebin groans from beside Sejeong as Hyeyeon covers Mina’s eyes. Sojin chuckles softly. “God, I swear these two can’t get off each other since they found out they were soulmates.”

“How are you okay with this again?” Sejeong queries, leaning closer and trying to look for the sadness in Sojin’s eyes.

Hyeyeon snorts beside her. “She found out weeks before that Hana wasn’t her soulmate. It’s the Chinese.”

“Yeah, and they’ve been trying to figure out a way to tell that to Hana. And then Hana walks in on them kissing one night and they braced themselves for the curses and screams but Hana smiled so brightly and told them Mimi’s her soulmate,” Mina adds.

“How timely,” Haebin grumbles, still weirded out by their friends’ reaction to all this.

“How- how did they find out Xiening’s- I thought Hana was-” Sejeong splutters, mind working at full speed. How the did she miss so much within one ing weekend spent in a workers’ retreat kind of thing? Last time she was here, Hana and Mimi were trying hard to keep their hands off each other and finding out a way to break the news to Sojin.

“Turns out virtual I love you doesn’t count,” Haebin tells her, rolling her eyes pointedly at Sojin. “I mean, who ing knew? It’s not like they tell us that in grade school, right? Anyway, Xiening confessed to Sojin the same moment Hana sent her the ‘I love you’ with kissy emoji.”

Sejeong whirls, glares at Sojin disbelievingly. “What the ?”

“I know.”

She sighs, presses her fingers to her temples. “And how did you find out it was Xiening?”

“She was being an and I went ‘wow, I have no idea why I even love you’ in a totally platonic-”

“-not really-” Mina interjects.

“-way. And she cried about her wrist and I just… we talked it over and figured it out.”

“I helped them figure it out,” Haebin exclaims, raising her hand in front of Sejeong. “I told them texts don’t count and Xiening remembered that day Hana sent Sojin the text, because it’s really hard to forget the day you confessed to the star of your dreams only for it to drown in her screaming out in pain and thinking it was because of her girlfriend sending a half-assed kissy-emoji filled text.”

“Yeah, it’s hard,” Xiening agrees, finally talking.

“It wouldn’t have been if you idiots actually listened to class before!” Haebin exclaims, voice turning thin and eyes widening. She sighs. “Written or texted I love you’s don’t count. I love you’s read or sang but written by another person don’t count. Joking I love you’s count as long as they’re said. I love you’s through phone calls and/or video chats count-”

“Okay, Haebin,” Mina interrupts, raising her hand to shut Haebin’s mouth. “We get it.”

It still irks Sejeong how easily they’re all taking this. “You’re seriously still going to go on with the wedding?”

“We spent so much on it already, and Xiening and Mimi agreed anyway,” Hana replies, dismissing her with a wave of her hand. “Besides, Hyeyeon and Mina won’t stop ing about not being the ring bearer and flower girl-”

“Which they are too old for, by the way,” Mimi interjects, glaring at the two smug faces across her.

It still doesn’t make sense to Sejeong. And she’s sure it doesn’t make that much sense to Haebin, Hyeyeon, and Mina either. “So, still this November, the wedding?”

“Yeah.”

“No… no huge drama? No slapping of cheeks and curses?”

“Well,” Xiening singsongs, sending Sojin a suggestive look. “I wouldn’t say no slappings and curses.”

“Oh, dear god, no,” Hyeyeon chokes beside Sejeong, hands around her neck and mimicking what a puking person might look like.

Sejeong glares, disbelieving. The other four in the bench across her stare at her. Then she shakes her head and laugh, because of course. Why did she ever even think that anything would change? Everyone’s taught from childhood that soulmates are unchanging, and heartbreaks do come but soulmates heal the broken hearts. They know that.

“God, this is so weird,” she mutters as they fall into the comfortable them.

They catch up on events, talk like they never went a day without one another. No awkwardness whatsoever. Except for Haebin’s foot constantly brushing Sejeong’s calf and kicking someone across them - who seems to be Mimi from the way she’s glaring at Haebin.

After some more kicking and glaring, Mimi sits up and clears . “By the way, Sejeong… we found Nayoung.”

She snaps and stares at a shyly smiling Mimi, eyebrows to her hairline and heart beating loudly. “...what?”

Haebin shifts beside her, to face her. “We found Nayoung… Mimi did, actually. She’s in Jeju, a few promotions away from taking over her father’s company. She’ll be attending the double wedding, as Mimi’s best… woman.”

“What?”

“Yeah, and she’ll be there for the bachelorette party. Will you… you want to go?”

Her lips spread into a wide smile, heart beating loudly to the sound of hope. But then her gaze land on Mimi’s wrist and she pauses, asks, “Is she with her soulmate?”

Mimi shares glances with Haebin, shifting uncomfortably under Hana’s arm. “We’re not- we don’t know.”

“I can’t,” she says, shrinking in her seat defeatedly. Hyeyeon wraps an arm around her, rocking her. “I won’t be able to deal with it, you know. Seeing her with her soulmate. I’ll die.”

“That’s all it’ll take?” Hana asks jokingly, receiving a protectively menacing glare from Hyeyeon.

“What about Chungha?” Haebin asks. “Don’t you think she’s the one?”

“I don’t… I don’t know, I guess.” She stares at the table, stares at that one chip in the wood that she liked staring at whenever she was thinking deeply since the first time they went in this place - high school students, giggling about one of Mimi’s extraordinary stories. “I just don’t…” feel the way I felt with Nayoung.

She doesn’t say it out loud, of course. Because that’s so harsh. But the others nod, like they know. They probably know.

“Anyway, I’m going to spend that night with Chungha. My birthday, remember?”

“Oh, yeah! Hey, any plans for that? Maybe we should move the party…”

The conversation shifts. Sad eyes turns merry again. Hyeyeon’s arm around her loosens. But her heart’s still beating too loudly for it to be normal, and now it’s hurting, too.

//

2 mon. 20 days. 5 hrs. 10 min.

Just as they’re all parting ways, Mimi grabs Sejeong’s elbow and pulls her aside, and asks, “You’re going to run away from Nayoung the same way she ran away from us?”

She shrugs. “It’s not running away. I’m just not that obsessed with her anymore, I guess. Besides, I’ve got Chungha.”

“You love Chungha?”

“Chungha’s… safe.”

Mimi frowns. “What are you going to pick: safety or love?”

She chuckles. “Love isn’t strong enough against fate, Mimi.”

“Yet look what happened to me, and Xiening,” Mimi replies easily, gaze lifting and lighting up at something behind Sejeong’s head - she’s willing to bet it’s Hana.

Again, she chuckles. Although, maybe ‘guffaws’ is a much more appropriate term. “Not everyone can be as lucky.”

This time, Mimi sighs. “Whatever you say. Pick safe, then.” She shrugs and walks past Sejeong to a waiting Hana. But before she reaches Hana, she turns back and hugs Sejeong, kisses her head and makes a face. “God, I’m being sappy. But just so you know, I think you can be as lucky.”

//

1 day 8 hrs. 2 min. 2 sec.

She picks safe. Because love isn’t strong enough against fate.

//

10 hrs. 17 min. 28 sec.

It jerks her awake.

When the tattoo was newer, the skin around was pink and the countdown underneath was hard to decipher. If you look hard enough, you can see it, sure. But Sejeong never tried. Why should she?

But today she peeks under the planets inked on her wrist and she’s caught off guard.

It’s today. And she picked staying at her apartment with Chungha over going to a party where Nayoung is. But she’s stubborn. And love is not strong enough against fate.

And if, just if, they - her and Nayoung - are soulmates, fate would find a way, right?

//

9 hrs

Chungha arrives with flour and whipped cream and a promise of good cookies. She arrives with a smile and a hug and a soft ‘happy birthday, babe’.

Sejeong remembers how Nayoung would always bring whipped cream and hit Sejeong’s face with it every damn birthday, and how she’d hug Sejeong anyway and kiss her sticky cheek and greet her a loud ‘happy birthday, Sejeong!’ And Sejeong can’t help but imagine it’s Nayoung’s arms around her.

(It’s not as warm, not as homey. But it’ll do.)

//

8 hrs

Chungha scoops the dough and leaves none for them to snack on while waiting for the cookies.

Sejeong bites her tongue to keep herself from saying “But Nayoung always left a quarter for snacking.”

//

7 hrs

Chungha burns the cookies and apologizes continuously, looking ashamed and shy and sincere.

Sejeong misses Nayoung’s smug face whenever the cookies turn out burned. Because Sejeong hates burned cookies but Nayoung lives for them. Burned cookies mean more for Nayoung; and more for Nayoung means a smug Nayoung.

//

6 hrs

Chungha asks Sejeong what she wants to do, and looks taken aback when Sejeong said she wanted to watch You Are The Apple Of My Eye. She knows Sejeong’s not a big fan of movies, but she shrugs and searches the movie on her laptop. And then she keeps quiet the whole time, only sound filling the room apart from the movie is the crunching of popcorn and cookies and the slurping of soda.

Sejeong tries hard not to scream. Nayoung wouldn’t have asked Sejeong what she wanted to do. Nayoung would’ve had an entire day planned out for the two of them - and sometimes the others - and she wouldn’t take no for an answer. And during movies, Nayoung wouldn’t keep quiet. Nayoung would comment on everything and make Sejeong both annoyed and amused and they wouldn’t be able to focus on the movie because they’d be debating over how realistic it is to keep wild animals on school grounds as if the whole Harry Potter series was made to be realistic.

At least they’re watching Nayoung’s favorite movie. But Sejeong hates it because now she can focus on the plot. She focuses too much on the plot.

//

5 hrs

Chungha suggests another movie, her own favorite, and is already typing the title on her laptop when Sejeong said she’s too tired for another movie.

Sejeong watches as Chungha’s shoulders droop and she scolds herself for not even trying to get Nayoung out of her mind. Look what she’s doing to poor Chungha, who’s sweet and gentle and resilient and just perfect. But instead she’s thinking of Nayoung. Goddamn Nayoung who left.

//

4 hrs

Chungha cleans up in the kitchen, and sets up their dinner.

Sejeong stays in the living room, mulling over how Nayoung doesn’t have a choice when it comes to her father. She knows Nayoung’s father, and knows that business is above everything. Maybe Nayoung’s leaving isn’t her fault. It’s her father’s. She shouldn’t be so mad at Nayoung.

//

3 hrs

Chungha’s still busy in the kitchen, pans and pots ringing as she works and hums along to her playlist playing on the speaker.

Sejeong takes out the jar of stars and goes through it again, eyes pricking more and more as each star is crumpled and thrown to the floor.

‘I’m feeling younger / everytime that I’m alone with you’

‘Don’t do unto others what you don’t want other to do unto you. Stupid, I know, but I’m running out of things to say!’

and

‘Fall in love, because falling in love is beautiful. Tell me about it when I get back, and I’ll give them the best friend talk.’

//

2 hrs

Chungha brings the food out to her. Because she’s Chungha and Chungha’s just knows what to do.

Sejeong buries Nayoung’s memories deep in her head like how the stars are buried deep in the garbage bags.

//

1 hr

Chungha makes her laugh.

Sejeong forces her heart to flutter.

//

30 min

Chungha takes out the wine.

Sejeong downs three glasses as Chungha watches amusedly.

//

15 min

Chungha kisses her.

Sejeong’s heart moves, but it isn’t a flutter.

//

33 sec.

She’s deep in a make out session with Chungha when her phone rings.

Annoyed, she takes the call. “Hello?”

She hears a hiccup, and some slurred words she can’t understand. The background noise is loud and it hurts Sejeong’s head.

“Hello?” She repeats, this time much softer.

“Is this… Kim Sejeong?” comes a slow, shaky voice.

“Yeah.”

“God, I love your voice. I missed it so much.”

She blinks, heart beating loudly. “Who is this?”

“Oh my god, I seriously miss you so much.”

“Excuse me, but who are you? I’m kinda busy and-”

“I love you.”

Pain. A sharp blast of pain on her wrist and she looks down to find the numbers fading. She blinks, and, with a new voice, asks, “Who are you?”

“, I love you so much. And I miss you too. But I love you more. I hope I don’t remember this when I wake up tomorrow.”

She opens , heart racing, about to ask for the nth time who the caller is, but the noise stops and she holds her phone out to find her wallpaper staring back at her

She looks back at Chungha, drifting off to a drunken sleep on the couch where Sejeong left her, then back at her phone. She doesn’t want to hope, really. But-

The phone lights up again, and she hurriedly answers it. “He-”

“Oh yeah, this is Kim Nayoung. I got your number from Jung Mimi.”

//

It all happens so fast. Okay, not fast, but blurry. Her phone in her hand, wallpaper blaring at full brightness. And then it’s snatched and Mimi’s groaning, grumbling, cursing. “You called her? You know, drunk texting is a thing.”

“The I love you thing wouldn’t work on texts, ask Sojin,” she replies, mutters, jutting her chin miserably towards a singing Sojin who’s hogging the mic.

“...what?”

“She’s my soulmate,” she tells her old friend, voice still low and miserable. “I mean- not Sojin, of course. That would make the whole thing more complicated than it was when Hana thought Sojin was her soulmate and Sojin thought Hana was hers and you and Xiening were just in the sidelines, staring sadly like two sad lovesick puppies and-”

“I didn’t sign up for a history lesson, ,” Mimi snaps. But her eyes turn soft as she looks back at her friend’s eyes. “Who… she’s your soulmate?”

She rubs the back of her neck sheepishly, alcohol making her cheeks heat. “Yup. She said it so casually, too. It was funny,” and as if to prove her point, she chuckles drunkenly. “Um. And then, um. She said she loved me because I knew her usual coffee shop order.”

“Why did you never tell her? Do you know how goddamn miserable she has been?”

“I was… I was scared. It’s stupid because this should take all the scaredness away. But it- knowing someone like her is my soulmate it- god, it scared me.I was so taken off guard that I didn't say it immediately. I said 'tomorrow', but tomorrow came and I faked a stomachache to get out of class and telling her. And I said 'tomorrow' but that didn't happen either."

“Wow, you put her in a lot of hurt."

"I know," she says defeatedly. "But I was scared. And every time I say 'tomorrow' I get more scared than I was the day before. It's just- I thought it might be a flaw in the code."

"No. You're just a coward."

“Mimi! I need you to meet someone!” Hana exclaims, pulling her bride-to-be by the elbow and sending her a small smile.

And then everything in between’s a blur. She remembers Sojin and Haebin fighting over the mic, Hyeyeon screaming onto hers on top of the other screams, and Xiening and Mina at one side playing with their food as Hana and Mimi make out at one booth.

Next thing she knows, she’s jolted awake by the sound of a slamming door and her headache trying to break her skull open. She sees a blur of a woman focus into the face of a cranky Sejeong and she’s frozen in space as the said Sejeong slaps Mimi awake, hands her a- is that a bucket of fried chicken?, and marches to where she is before pulling her into a kiss.

And then she melts. And then she’s kissing back. And then there’s a groaning Haebin behind them, saying “Please don’t tell me it’ll be a triple treat wedding.” And then there’s the two kids crawling over to Mimi to grab chicken legs.

And then she knows she's home.

A/N: Hellooo. So, I totally miscalculated my free time and thought I'd be able to post it the weekend of the week I posted the first chapter. I probably would've been able to if I didn't add so many new scenes and stuff. And if it weren't the last weeks of the sem. I'm actually supposed to be studying for my finals, but I couldn't get this off my mind. So, here it is. I hope you guys liked it! Comments are VERY much appreciated.