i wanted to publish this yesterday but let me tell you something. sometimes, most of the times, Google docs start acting like a brat and hence deletes everything saved. it ate up 2500 something words that i wrote. it doesn't sound like a lot of words but believe me, it's easier to write after 2500 words than rewriting everything again.

oh and I've made Baekhyun and Junmyeon taller than Jongin, is that bad? Of course, not. Lol.

Sehun wakes up to Baekhyun’s annoying loud voice from outside of his bedroom, the man continues drumming his knuckles against the door to get Sehun’s attention until Sehun gives him with an equally degrading greeting.

Baekhyun leaves after he promises that he will wake up in five minutes and will get ready for the company. Only he doesn't want to. With barely open eyes he looks around his bedroom, yawning before picking up his phone from where he left it last night. There's a small pounding in his head but nothing that he isn't used to.

His phone goes off and he wonders for a brief second who would be messaging him at the moment. It's Jongin. He scrolls through the number of messages that Jongin has sent, feeling some sort of strange emotion in between. Every message is of this morning, he realizes,

still, i apologize, sir

i shouldn't have crossed my limit

but i got a little upset

not that i can share that with you

but still

i apologize

Sehun’s eyebrows furrow before he reads the messages, he realizes, were sent after eight in the morning.

Sir, it's eight

are you alright?

Sir, it's nine in the morning

I hope you're alright

Sir, it's ten

Eleven

Twelve in the AfTerNoOn

One, sir, it's one in the afternoon

where are you?

the meeting is supposed to start in one hour

Oh My GOd

Sir, why aren't you picking up my calls?

are you dead?

(Sehun snickers at the last message, he might as well be for the last few hours.)

sir, the meeting is canceled

even then your father wants to see you

he is not going to leave the company building until he meets you

he is saying so

please come soon

it's really

awkward here

Sir

Sir?

Sir? Sir?

At least pick up our calls

It's not until Jongin’s words finally sink in his sleepy state of mind that he realizes what he did. He quickly looks at the small clock sitting by his bedside table before cursing loudly. 2:30 PM. Oh wow.

Getting up from his bed in his still sleepy state, he practically runs toward the bathroom, closing the door and quickly stepping out of his clothes to take a quick shower. His father is going to be so damn angry. The worst part is that he wouldn't be able to give a reasonable excuse too, with what he only was drinking his off and didn't wake up on time this morning.

In half an hour, he is ready to go to the company building, dressed snugly in his black suit, wet hair sticking to his forehead that he pushes aside in annoyance. He's so going to get a lecture from the old man who he calls his father.

His father and Jongin and Baekhyun are waiting for him in his office, a sour expression on his father's face, smug on Baekhyun’s, seeing his disheveled state. But it's the expression on his secretary's face that gives a flutter of emotion to him, this strange emotion. He's looking worried, eyes looking so sad that he contemplates if giving a hug to Jongin at this moment would be a right thing to do or not.

“You two, Baekhyun and Jongin, wait outside. I want to have a word with my careless son.” Mr. Oh points to the door then, eyes annoyed and face looking angry. The two said men quickly do as instructed, walking out of the office without as much as a word…

but, Jongin, before finally walking past Sehun, gives a squeeze to the elder's hand as if trying to give him some kind of motivation. Or maybe something else, Sehun’s state of mind is not strong enough to find the correct word. Maybe it's strength, to give Sehun some strength as if he knows how pressuring Mr. Oh can be. In any way, Sehun does feel a little relaxed. Maybe Jongin took some tension out off his body.

He can't feel more whipped than he did at the moment after Jongin’s heart-stopping and cute behavior.

It all ends in a flash though, as soon as the door closes, his father begins in his deep, baritone voice,

“Was it another of your night flings?”

Jongin paces back and forth outside of the Ceo's office, gnawing at his lower lip in worry. He knows his boss is in trouble and even though he doesn't know his boss that well, yet, Jongin decides to worry about your boss is a reasonable thing after all. Especially after witnessing with his own two eyes how much angry Mr. Oh really was.

“Doing this won't save him,” Baekhyun points out, watching as Jongin flinches at the sudden voice. He snickers, “did you actually forget that I am standing here for the last five minutes with you? I am hurt.” Just for more dramatic effect, he places a hand over his heart, eyes playfully getting sad at the possibility of being forgotten.

“Oh no,” Jongin shakes his head and ever the late, naive person that he is, doesn't understand the joke behind the elder's words. What can you say to him anyway, being talked like that by someone who you are working under is actually scary. He just hopes he hadn't offended his boss's best friend. He could be kicked out and it's just the second day at the company.

“I didn't mean to make you feel so, sir. It wasn't my intention. I apologize.” Jongin bows, keeping his head low just to show that he actually gives respect to the elder male.

Baekhyun waves him off with a careless flick of his hand before resting an arm over the younger’s shoulders. “Do you have any idea why he didn't come early? Or why he was so late?”

Jongin shakes his head, gently prying the arm over his shoulders before shaking his head again. Baekhyun is taller than him and most importantly a stranger to him, he doesn't think if they are close enough for Baekhyun to touch him like that or poke him in his waist for that matter. “I've no idea, sir. I am new here and I don't know anything.”

“Oh, that says all.” Baekhyun doesn't look the least bit offended so Jongin decides it's nothing to worry about. “But you probably heard about his reputation, didn't you?”

“I did.” Jongin nods, hesitant. Not that he really wants to talk to Baekhyun about that. Until now his boss has only been kind to him, no flirting, no disgusting moves are made on him (or at least, he thinks so). “But the boss is good to me, I don't think if I should—”

“Oh Jongin,” Baekhyun coos, shaking his head. “Alright if you say so. But I am always here, just so you know, you can always talk about him to me. I'll tell you everything about him. Everything.”

Jongin shakes his head, reddening a little. “Why would I ever want to know anything about sir anyway, sir?”

Baekhyun doesn't answer for some time and when does, it only ends up confusing Jongin furthermore. “Believe me, I know you will. I know he will too. I know everything, I can see the near future.”

“What does that mean—” Jongin stops at the sound of a door opening before straightening up and bowing to Mr. Oh. “Sir, I apologize—”

“You don't need to. You did whatever you could to get him here, it was his fault. Don't worry.” Mr. Oh pats his shoulder once before nodding at Baekhyun and walking out of the place and to the elevator. Baekhyun follows him, waving a quick bye to Jongin before disappearing from his line of sight.

Sehun clears his throat behind him, catching Jongin’s attention who quickly turns around and finally pays his boss some attention after a whole ten minutes of break. “Come in, we have got a lot of work to do.” Sehun nods at him once before walking back to the office.

Jongin notices something odd and he doesn't keep his mouth shut about it. He can't help it, he and his loud mouth are some of the most favorite combinations made by the God itself. “Sir, your cheek is swollen.” He points out, a finger to the red cheek.

“Hush, Jongin. Don't speak so loud, someone might hear you.”

“But we are the only one on this floor at this moment, sir,” says Jongin.

Sehun sighs, internally rolling his eyes before pointing at the huge pile of files kept on the table. “You didn't warn me dad gave this much work in only a few hours.”

“I apologize, sir, I was told to keep my mouth close so that you can find your surprise by yourself.”

Sehun snorts, “surprise.”

Shaking his head, he tells Jongin that he should, without any further delay, get to work. He merely has to sign the files; the documents before handing them back to his father but still the number of files kept on his table are enough to give him nightmares for a week (he isn't exaggerating, really).

Shifting back so that he is sitting flat against his chair, he asks Jongin to read the documents so that the things become easier for the both of them and less time consuming too. Jongin does. Ever so attentive person that he is, he realizes through signing the fifth file that Sehun could really use some coffee. Only if he wants to finish this work on time and go back home and to Jin on time.

“Thank you,” Sehun shouts just before Jongin closes the door of the Ceo's office with a soft click. Even though he knows Sehun won't hear, he whispers a small “welcome” under his breath, as he walks toward the elevator leading down to the first floor of the huge company building.

Upon reaching the floor and spotting the machine at the first glance, he strolls through it, eyes a little drowsy because of sleep. Truth to be told, Jongin is always sleepy, so it's expected of him if he wants to sleep anywhere, anytime. He punches the buttons, the favorite of his boss engraved in his mind, before placing the cup below the nozzle.

Footsteps coming closer to him are drowned by his yawns, eyes scrunching shut, he nearly scalds his hand with the hot beverage. Just saved in time.

“You need to be careful if you don't want to hurt yourself.” A deep, soft voice advises from behind him, making him jump a little. He turns around, bowing immediately when he realizes who the man actually is, Kim Junmyeon. Not that Jongin can ever forget this face. “You don't need to,” says Junmyeon, smiling down at him.

“I just got distracted.”

“Because of? You're just sleepy, be careful otherwise, you'll end up hurting yourself a big time.” Then the man points to the elevator, a gentle, harmless smile on his handsome feature. “I've heard Sehun saying how you don't like coffee. We can always go out for tea.”

“Out of the building?” Jongin asks, confused.

Junmyeon nods at him, pushing a hand in his pants pocket. “There's this small cafe just outside the building. They sell the best.”

“I,” Jongin stops, contemplates for some moments but in the end decides that there's nothing wrong in following the elder down to the shop. Even though he doesn't know Junmyeon that much, a part inside of him isn't ready to say no to someone as important as Junmyeon. So he nods and follows Junmyeon to the elevator, outside of the building and toward the cafe.

“It's a lovely day, don't you think so?” Says the man, as if desperate to start a conversation between the two; desperate to hear the lovely voice of the younger as much as possible. “Not too hot, not too cold.”

“It is.” Jongin nods, thanking the man when Junmyeon holds the door of the cafe open for him. “I didn't quite catch, sir,” says Jongin after finishing ordering his own beverage, “about your visit to the company.”

“Oh, that.” Junmyeon nods, straightening up and fixing his cufflinks, he speaks, “it was completely out of my plan, I had to schedule everything again to come and meet Sehun.”

“Why, if I may ask?”

“Nothing too bothering, all about shares and all. We need to talk that out. Otherwise, we will get serious competition from our rivals. Especially after the failure of his band.”

“Oh, I just found out yesterday. A group from Oh Entertainment failed and from what I am hearing, the boss doesn't want to see failure again.”

“It was lack of promotion, I believe. Not that Sehun didn't spend money on the kids; he did. It was just not enough. He's the only one from our group of friends whose band has failed. That's the funniest thing that has ever happened between us since High School.”

Jongin stops at that, looking down at his hot cup of tea, he speaks in a rather timid voice, “still, one should not remember him because of his failure. There must a lot of reasons, maybe people really didn't like the concept? I've found that one of the members had a bad past, her reputation was bad since the start. Maybe people didn't want to give her a chance and hence the whole band failed?”

Junmyeon smiles the smile which means he is amused about something but doesn't want to speak about; rather keep a secret in a secret hidden place inside of his mind, as if its something admirable. Something Treasure like. “Yes, that must be.”

Jongin flushes under the man's gaze, eyes downcast he quickly sips his tea, the thought that his boss is waiting for him in his office completely slipping out of his mind.

Junmyeon is a kind man, Jongin finds out, kind and generous and funny like young grandpas’. He is playful (and tells Jongin strange jokes; Jongin only laughs out of respect. Really, there's nothing to laugh about, except how the man finds his own jokes funny and laughs as if they were the funniest jokes ever said). Junmyeon tells him how he'd struggled to get where he was, one of the richest businessmen in Korea, how he'd to sacrifice his everything just to secure his and his family’s future.

Jongin takes note of everything that he hears, as the saying goes, 'never ignore words of a wise man’.

Junmyeon asks if he wants to go to a nearby shopping mall with him because he has to buy a gift for his dear cousin, Jongin says yes at first but soon realizes what did wrong. With a loud “oh, no, Mr. Oh must be waiting for the cup of coffee I'd promised him” he fast walks to the building, Junmyeon following him.

“You don't need to worry, we can tell him that I asked you out. That’s the truth too, Jongin.”

(Jongin flushes at the use of the words but quickly regains his composure, trying and failing to will away the flush off of his cheeks.)

Jongin nods, not really paying attention to the elder in his own attempt at bringing down his frantically beating heart to a normal pace. He ed up. His hands shiver as they hold the cup of hot coffee, he walks to the elevator, Junmyeon waiting for him.

“Why are you so worried, Jongin? Don't worry he is—”

“He is going to kill me, sir.” Jongin insists, brushing aside the fringes falling over his eyes with his free hand. “How could I do this even? I was never this forgetful. Oh, no.”

“Did he call you even once?”

Before Jongin can answer anything ('no, he didn't. Not even once’), there's a small ding and the door of the elevator opens, revealing a very familiar office. “Let's go, sir.”

Just before he opens the door of the office, Junmyeon stops him with a rather delicate hold on his almost frail, bony wrist. “Jongin, I had a great time with you,” says he, sincerity lacing his words. “I wanted to ask if you would go out with me, again? I mean sometime later when we're off from work. We can always go somewhere you want to. What do you say?”

Jongin says yes, not really paying attention to the meaning behind the businessman's words. He gently takes his hand back, Junmyeon apologizes to him, Jongin waves it off with a small shake of his small head.

The door opens and Sehun is revealed; a sleeping Sehun to be exact. The man is perched over the table, head tucked between his strong arms, papers are everywhere on the floor (Jongin realizes Sehun has switched off the AC and opened the huge windows in the room). His shoes are thrown in a corner of the room, the coat was thrown on the floor (Jongin decides that the man wanted to aim for the couch).

It's a mess. Sehun is almost as messy as Kyungsoo used to be. Or maybe more than that.

Oh God, how much he wants to strangle his boss.

“Oh,” says Junmyeon behind him, “he is dead—don’t worry, I will see him.” He says when Jongin passes him one of his shocked looks. “You can go outside, you know, I've to talk to him anyway.”

So Jongin does with a little reluctance, places his boss's coffee by his side and bows to Junmyeon before finally walking out of the office. It's dark outside, outside of the building, warning of a heavy downpour already given. He stands by the window, looking around in wonder and slight envy at the sight of young children roaming and playing around the streets in the light rain.

Jin must be home by now too, probably with Lucas or Lucas's mother. He sighs, leaning against the window and repeating the memories of less than an hour ago. As he ponders over them, especially on the words of the elder, he feels a flush taking over his cheeks. A smile blooms on his lips for reasons unknown, something that he himself can't quite put his finger on before he cups his cheeks with his hands and takes a few deep breaths.

Brushing aside the fringes from over his eyes, he thinks back to the moment when Junmyeon had done the same, saying something along the lines of “how it was inappropriate for Jongin to be so pretty and distract him mid-talk”. He takes a deep breath again and cups his cheeks before shaking his head a little.

Tucking a strand of his hair behind his ear, he looks back out, remembering about the most important man of his life, that he loved more than anyone else; not more than his own kind and loving father (or maybe he just loves to lie) but definitely not less than him. Looking around the empty lobby and satisfying himself with the fact that there's no one there, he opens the window a little, allowing the cool breeze to come inside and freshen him.

Kyungsoo used to bring him out in the rain to 'bath’, saying he knows how much Jongin loves rain. Not that it was a fabricated lie or something, Jongin has always loved rain, but still, the aftermath of bathing in the rain was as bad as anything else could be.

He thinks back to Kyungsoo and how he'd to take care of the older man whenever he would get sick because of rain. He thinks back to all those moments when Kyungsoo used to bring him out in the rain and join him under the shower of nature despite knowing how he will end up after that.

Such a kind, loving husband was Kyungsoo! Only if God hadn't decided to take him away from him, snatch someone as good as Kyungsoo from them. Jongin has always considered Him cruel anyway (whoever He is), not that he was surprised to hear the news of Kyungsoo’s death, just sad, upset, angry, maybe felt a little alone, maybe numb from crying for hours, maybe… maybe a lot of other emotions.

Jongin sighs, again for the nth time, willing the thoughts of past away. It will only leave him sadder anyway. He looks down at the empty ring finger, imagining something diamond-like on it years ago. Putting the said hand aside, he looks back when the sound of a door opening comes from a distance.

“That took longer than I expected,” says Junmyeon looking down at the watch around his wrist. “More than an hour. I should leave now,” he mumbled to himself before walking to Jongin. “Uh, Jongin, please think about what I said.”

Jongin nods, a little shy, before looking back at the CEO’s closed office door. “Mr. Oh?”

“Oh, he is awake no, of course. Don't worry, he won't say anything to you, I already talked to him.”

Junmyeon leaves him after that, bidding a goodbye, before walking toward the elevator and hence out of the building. Jongin walks back inside the office, clasping his hands, a string of apologies already sitting on his lips.

“You were with Junmyeon.” That's the first thing his boss says. Second being: “Did you have enough fun or you want to go out with someone else too?”

Jongin shakes his head, slightly tearing up at the scoff that Sehun passes him at that. “It wasn't planned Mr. Oh. We met and—”

“Decided to hang out together. Yeah, yeah I get that.” Sehun waves him off and this weird feeling too, something like jealousy or something. Sehun clears his throat and points to the pile of files kept on the table. “We need to finish this by this evening.”

“Papa!”

“Yes?”

“Did you know one of my classmates live here?”

“Of course, I don't know. You never told me.” Jongin playfully accuses.

Jin gasps, covering his small mouth with his small hands. “Because I didn't know. I just found out today.” The boy takes his Papa's hand in his own, Jongin silently marveling at the touch of his son's small hand. “You know I will tell you everything, Papa. You'll always be the first.”

“But when you confessed your love for dogs, you told daddy first.”

“Oh, that.” Jin pouts, eyes blinking as he stares down at his Papa's chest in silence. “I forgot that you loved dogs too.”

“How can you when you know that I have three—”

“Papa, are you trying to make me cry?”

“Oh, you look cute when you cry though.”

“So you want me to cry?”

“Do you want to cry?”

“Do you want me to cry?”

“No.” Jongin sighs, getting that his son's not going to leave this as easily as he thought initially. “Tell me about your school.”

“Then you'll tell me about your work?”

Jongin smiles one of the smiles reserved solely for his son. “How kind of you. Will you help me out with my problems then?”

“I'll try.”

After rubbing his face as much as possible without breaking his skin, Sehun decides to let it go. The red mark of his father's hand will fade away anyway. After what happened today, he mentally decides that he shouldn't, at any cost, doubt his father's strength. No matter how old his father is, he is still as strong as ever.

With a last look at his still red cheek, he walks back into his bedroom, the bright light of his laptop glaring at him. That and the sound of constant messages coming; he knows it’s his father, without even checking. He sighs, runs a hand through his hair and mentally prepares himself for the mental torture of another few hours coming his way. If only he hadn’t drunk so much last night.

A yawn slips past his lips before he sits on his bed, back resting against the headboard, laptop already in his lap. There are only a few pictures to go through, he thinks, and a few profiles (he decides not to focus on the number of the few pictures and profiles), he should be fine, if anything.

After going through at least hundred profiles by now, Sehun comes across something very interesting. It’s a picture of his PA, he brings the laptop closer to his face, a picture of his PA where his PA is drinking water from a water bottle. A sane part inside of his mind signals that Jongin was asking this (or these, if there are more) picture to be deleted but he pushes the sane part at the back of his head before silently getting on the work of appreciating the beauty that is his PA.

He wasn’t wrong (neither Baekhyun) when he thought that his PA could make a good (more than just a simple good) model and this specific picture is enough of a proof. He places the laptop on the bed, lays on his stomach but during these moments, he doesn’t move his eyes anywhere from the photo. Nothing is more sinful than watching Jongin drinking water (if there are any, Sehun doesn’t want to think about them right now), with how he’s holding the bottle to his lips or how he’s drinking. His eyes flit to the very face he has learned to admire since the first time it came into his sight, from the closed eyes to the curve of his soft cheeks to his sharp jaws and to his... lips.

Such a beautiful sinful sight he makes!

He rests his cheek on his hand clicking the ‘next’ button, wondering if there were any other pictures of Jongin. Its the next one, one where Jongin is looking straight into the camera lens, expression of surprise clearly written on his pretty face. The bottle is just by his side, wrapped by delicate fingers, hand covering almost half of his face where he is, what Sehun assumes, wiping the droplets of the water. It’s clear that his PA realized that someone, Jackson, was clicking his pictures.

So pretty, he thinks with a smile. He doesn’t feel tired anymore.

The next picture is the best one.

It’s Jongin and him in the same picture, and it’s that moment that Sehun hasn’t forgotten ever since that happened. Bringing his laptop closer to his face, he squints his eyes at the exact place where he’s touching Jongin’s lip. Thinking about it now, he wonders how he is still alive, with what’s happening to his heart just by looking at it now, after one whole day. Jongin is looking as lovely as ever, small next to him and a sane and alone part inside of his heart signals that it could be something that he was looking for all along.

He gently closes the door of that part, focusing back at the picture.

Another ten minutes passes by looking through all the three pictures, and at exact eleven in the night he decides that he’s going to keep one of them as his phone wallpaper. It’s difficult to choose one of them when all of them are so pretty. He tilts his head, thoughts of deleting the pictures slipping out of his mind, he chooses the last one as his phone wallpaper; the first one as his laptop wallpaper; the middle one as his Gmail’s profile picture (after all he wanted to use every single picture somewhere important).

The night passes just like that; with him appreciating his PA’s beauty, going through those three pictures again and again before finally falling into a deep slumber sometime after midnight.

i am so happy to hear that you all find this new version better than before. i feel too. lol. i hope to finish this, this time. so please be patient as i am struggling with stress these days a lot.

i’ll try to update as much as possible from here and another abo story of mine, but i can’t be sure. although i super much appreciate your willingness to read more updates and “please update soon” too, i don’t think if i would be able to handle that much pressure now. i have got a lot in my plate now and maybe out of irritation or frustration i’ll end up deleting every “please update soon” comments.

don’t get me wrong, please. i am trying my best to not sound rude and i honestly hope that you all will understand my problem. you people have no idea how much i want to write from here since i have so many ideas and inspiration flowing inside my pretty little head. but, this stress and my regularly deteriorating health are not helping matters. just in case, if anyone of you is interested to know, i am seeing a doctor and i hope i’ll get better because this is going to kill me someday. and i am not ready for that, yet.

come on, like i’ve to meet Exo and tell them especially Jongin how much i love him. i don’t want to do something silly. even then, y’all, i want only positivity around me, so i am trying to keep this as light as possible.

but one thing is sure, i am telling you, don’t take mental illness as a joke. it’s not like i’ve taken it as a joke but i’ve neglected it, lost hours of sleep (i’ve been sleeping only two to three hours for whole day since the past few weeks; and eww, i am getting these horrendous dark circles too. somebody sAVE Me, please), got irritated at literally everyone for even talking to me, snapped at a lot of people (even at my mom, how embarrassing is that even?) and blah, blah, blah.

simple and straight, don’t ignore this , it’s real and it spreads like poison.

still, you all, take care of yourself because you do matter. even i do to some people and that’s why i am fighting, otherwise...

(look how much of a drama queen i am, have you seen someone like me before? Lol)

please, take care.

oh, and you can read this on ao3 too (link is in the forward), if you want, you can always support me there...

please, don’t, by any chance, do pity on me. i am very serious