Review for Everlasting Vow

Dark Moon - Review Shop

Link: http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/126225

WHAT YOU WILL BE JUDGED BY:

  • Title: Interesting title. Since you have only a few chapters, I can't really say if the title and plot match. 
  • Poster: I like dark angsty posters, like yours. So I'm expecting a dark storyline from you. 
  • Plot/Originality: Unfortunately your plot is overused. I don't judge you on this but it's a reminder to maybe next time, you can choose a unique plot. But so far I liked how your story is written. 
  • Description: Detailed and short. Great!
  • Grammar/Spelling/all those essay requirement goodies: Of course everyone has the mistakes but sometime, go back and check. 
  • How quickly your story goes (or slow!): Good job. Your break in scene was detailed and I liked it :)

ADVICE WILL BE GIVEN

  • How to improve writing style: Research things up. It's Seoul University. I'm in America and I don't know how schools and such in Korea is but in America, college 'principals' are called chancellors. And changing your grades is against the law- illegal. So I think being stuck in jail would be the bigger problem than getting expelled. 
  • Grammar/spelling mistakes: As I said earlier ^^
  • Tips to make the story flow easier: NA
  • Any questions you need answered!

Addition Comments: I like your story, so I subscribed. I rarely go on, since I do have a life outside my computer but anytime I get a chance to go on, I'll check your fanfic out! Like I said, there are some things you should research before writing. I also really like how your antagonists (The Populars) were full of people I would never expect to be mean. Even in my fics, your chosen Populars are the nice conservative ones. 

That is all! Keep up the good work!

Like this story? Give it an Upvote!
Thank you!

Comments

You must be logged in to comment
ali060903
#1
Hi, I don't know if you still review stories since I comment 4 years after the latest chap but I hope you do as I really need a review for my story.
Title: Love Potions
Link: https://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/1219300/love-potions-fantasy-fluff-jaemin-originalcharacter-jisung-jeno-marklee-nct-haechan-nctdream-chenle-renjun
Author's name: ali060903
Basic plot: A hidden magical secret is revealed between YG's and SM's youngest group. But surprisingly, there is still a bigger one left.
An extra info: I've just written 7th chap so there are more surprises in the later chaps. But yeah, I need some review to better my writing.
Thanks. XOXO ლ(╹◡╹ლ)
EhkkalaMinYoungie
#2
Aha! Thanks for the review! I'll get a new one, soon! ^^
To be completely honest, no. Spelling bug me a lot >.>
luhan-hart
#3
Title of Story: 7th period is a secret<br />
<br />
Link of Story: http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/97220/7th-period-is-a-secret-donghae-drama-romance-schoollife-yoona-yoonhae<;br />
<br />
Author's Name: eunice_hyuk09<br />
<br />
Basic Plot: Im Yoona is the mood maker of their class. She smiles alot, make friends and make them happy.<br />
But what will be the outcome if she is not the Yoona that everybody knows?<br />
Her homeroom teacher, Lee Donghae, is the Teacher-of-all-Students. Because they like him.<br />
But it felt like that this teacher know about something going on in Yoona and Yoona finds that herself.<br />
what will she do?<br />
<br />
Any extra info whatnot.: it's a 3 chapter story. A drama, romance genre. It's about school life. Hope you could review ^^
EhkkalaMinYoungie
#4
Title of Story : Just Because You're My Noona<br />
<br />
Link of Story : http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/100137/just-because-you-re-my-noona-fluff-minho-minyul-yuri<;br />
<br />
Author's Name : EhkkalaMinYougnie<br />
<br />
Basic Plot : Their band's pride always stood before their own greed. They can't just say this and that. Sometimes, pride costs you a lot..<br />
<br />
Any extra info whatnot : It's a oneshot! I understand about school life (since I suffer the same) so no rush! When you're able to read it in a good pace, I'd be alright. ^^
SHANAphylaxis #5
THANKS FOR THE REVIEW!!! It was really helpful. Thank you for subscribing as well :)<br />
Thanks for your feedback. I don't read many FF here therefore I don't know which plots here are overused or not, but thank you for informing me. I'll just add my twist to the story to make it different. English is not my first language too and perhaps I'll just do a computer spell-check. And yeah, I really didn't do any researching on Korean education system that's why I've applied the American system.<br />
<br />
again, THANK YOU for the honest review! :)
SHANAphylaxis #6
Title of Story: Everlasting Vow<br />
Link of Story: http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/126225<;br />
Author's Name: Miss-terious<br />
Basic Plot: Donghae and Gela have been in the same class for twelve years but never did they talk. After a failed attempt to break in the school's record section to cheat on their grades, Donghae was nearly expelled. His punishment led him to cross his path with Gela; an encounter that is going to change his life forever<br />
<br />
Any extra info whatnot: just started writing it, so, it still has 3 chapters. But I figured out I need a review to improve on certain aspects immediately :)
CrystalxDoLL
#7
Thank you so much for the review :) I apologize, I forgot to subscribe hehe ._.
Shawol4ever22 #8
thanku for the review :D <3
CrystalxDoLL
#9
Title of Story: My Best Friend is A Crossdresser?<br />
Link of Story: http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/81697<;br />
Author's Name: CrystalxDoLL<br />
Basic Plot: Yun and Sunha have to live together because their parents have to work abroad for a while. On their first day together, Sunha had been acting strange. Eventually, Yun discovers that she is actually a guy named Sungjong.<br />
Any extra info whatnot: It has . :))
Shawol4ever22 #10
Title: Kiss Kiss Kiss<br />
Link: http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/94646/kiss-kiss-kiss<;br />
Author: Me (Shawol4ever22)<br />
Basic Plot: well, this is a ff revolving around the jongkey couple from SHINee. So basically, jonghyun meets key and finds out he hasn't had his first kiss yet and he tries to take it from him, along the way he gives him 'almost kisses'.<br />
Extra Info: i know i made A LOT of mistakes in my story ^^; and some extra chapters are in there, and some random stuff. lol please go easy on me xD and thanks in advance <3 (: