The moment he sees Hyoje in Doyoung’s arms, Jaehyun knows they made the right decision. He had been hesitant that a child was right for them at this point in their lives, with Doyoung working to make a good reputation for himself in the firm and Jaehyun always busy in the beginning stages of his new company, but the calm that falls over his husband when he looks down into those large, round eyes makes all his worries disappear.

Doyoung is smiling so peacefully, one of his fingers caught between their newborn daughter’s hands, and Jaehyun watches as a single tear slides down his cheek and falls off his chin. Jaehyun lift his camera in front of his face and snaps a photo while Doyoung is still unaware of his presence.

“She’s beautiful,” Doyoung whispers after the flash of the camera goes off and his face scrunches gently as more tears spill down his cheeks.

The nurse who handed their baby girl to them is still in the room, but Jaehyun sits down in the chair next to his husband and kiss all his tears away, laughing into his cheek as his own eyes well with tears. This is his family; not just Doyoung, but a tiny baby girl who is the most beautiful creature Jaehyun has ever laid eyes on.

“She looks like you,” Jaehyun whispers as he runs a finger gently over her cheek.

They hadn’t wanted to know which of them would be the biological father in the end, but it’s clear that she is Doyoung’s daughter and Jaehyun knows now that he wouldn’t want it any other way.

“The next one will be yours then,” Doyoung chuckles and places a short kiss on Jaehyun’s forehead.

“I think you’re getting ahead of yourself now,” Jaehyun murmurs as he reaches out to take Hyoje from Doyoung’s arms.

Only looking at her and actually feeling her little body in his arms turns out to be two very different things, with a whole load of feelings attached to feeling her hands and feet squirm a little against his chest.

“Yeah, okay. The next one,” he whispers.

Doyoung wraps his arms around him and they lean their heads together as they sit for a long minute and only look at her sleeping face.

The nurse approaches them quietly, a closed envelope in her hand.

“You can take her home now,” she says and hands the envelope to Doyoung before leaving the room with a heartfelt congratulation.

The document is Hyoje’s temporary birth certificate, Jaehyun had helped fill it out only moments prior, and seeing it in Doyoung’s hands as he reads it over makes it all so real.

This little girl is theirs now.

After the months of searching for a surrogate and all the paperwork and the long nights and the tears when it felt like they would never be allowed to make their family whole, and then the nine months of waiting and anticipating her arrival, she is finally here.

Jaehyun feels exhausted to the bone and yet so energised at the same time.

“Ready?” Doyoung asks.

“Ready,” Jaehyun smiles back at him.

Her room has been painted a soft pastel green, decorated with a large cherry blossom tree and its pink petals scattered over the walls as if caught in the wind. The project had taken Jaehyun months to finish, and he is quite happy with the result.

He holds his breath as Doyoung places her gently into her modest, white-oak crib and when she is placed safely on the mattress, Doyoung steps back to stand at his side and grips his hand tightly in his.

A long moment goes by and when no sound of distress comes from Hyoje, they simultaneously exhale a breath of relief.

“I still think it should be more pink,” Jaehyun whispers as he hooks his arm around Doyoung’s waist and leans his head against his husband’s.

“You got your cherry blossoms, stop complaining,” Doyoung chides playfully, voice a low murmur so not to wake their baby.

“But pink is so pretty,” Jaehyun pouts and pokes Doyoung in the stomach. They quiet as Hyoje whimpers and squirms her body, but after a few seconds she settles again.

“I’m still gonna buy her a princess dress,” Jaehyun whispers and Doyoung laughs quietly into his hair, and then they stand in silence and watch the new addition to their family sleep.

Some time later, when the sun has finally set completely and the only lights outside the windows are city lights, Jaehyun feels his stomach churn in hunger. It is with great difficulty that he tears himself away from the sight of their little girl, but neither of them have eaten since they entered the hospital in the early morning and food is a necessity.

He pulls out of Doyoung’s arms and walks to the far corner under the window and moves the soft armchair in front of the crib for Doyoung to sit in.

“I’ll make us some dinner,” he whispers as he brushes Doyoung’s hair out of his face.

“I love you,” he mouths against his husband’s lips and they share a lengthy kiss.

He sends a thought of thanks and love to his mother when he opens the refrigerator door and finds a box of kimchi stew, ready to be reheated. His parents had called earlier in the day, saying they would come by the next day to see their granddaughter, but his mother must have worried about them to come all the way just to provide them with food.

He dumps the contents in a pot and turns on the oven top, stirring carefully with a wooden spoon.

Hyoje wakes up when the food is almost warm, her loud cries travelling through the apartment. At least they won’t have any trouble hearing her, at any time.

Jaehyun hurries to fill the kettle with water to boil and wash his hands thoroughly with disinfectant soap, but when he turns to the little area of counter top beside the sink, his mind blanks on what to do next.

“What do I do?” he turns to Doyoung when he hears him enter the kitchen, his presence hard to mask with the tiny baby squalling in his arms.

“Wash the bottle and everything,” Doyoung says quietly as he rocks back and forth while trying to get Hyoje to take the pacifier in .

Jaehyun nods rapidly as all he has read and practiced comes trickling back into his mind and he cleans the counter top and the bottle and teat and the measuring scoop, and gets his racing heart under control.

The kettle turns off just as the kimchi stew in the pot starts boiling and like a switch Jaehyun’s nerves are strung high once more. It seems focusing on more than one thing has become an impossible feat to him.

Doyoung, on the other hand, easily swoops in and turns the heat down on the stew while still rocking their daughter in one arm, and he is so calm Jaehyun envies him for it.

Not even a day has gone by and his first real task as a father has left him a rattled mess.

“How are you so calm?” he whines as he tries to remember how much formula powder he should use.

“You’re usually the one freaking out about everything.”

He turns away so Doyoung won’t see him pout, but there is no response from his husband at all, not even a chuckle. Doyoung is entranced by the newborn baby in his arms, smiling blissfully even as she cries and cries.

Jaehyun follows the instructions on the formula container to the letter and shakes the bottle to mix it thoroughly before testing the temperature, just as he has practiced it.

When the milk is warm, but not hot, he hands the bottle to Doyoung and with a little trial and error, Hyoje finally takes the teat in and starts drinking.

The room is oddly quiet after that, and Jaehyun almost feels like he could cry again, watching his daughter happily drink the milk he prepared for her. He inhales shakily and Doyoung lifts his eyes to his and gives him a soft, proud smile.

“We’ll be good at this eventually,” he says and walks carefully to lean against the counter next to Jaehyun, “step by step.”

Jaehyun laughs breathlessly and wipes at his eyes with his thumbs. He wraps his arm around Doyoung’s waist and tugs him gently to lean into his chest and then he hooks his chin on his husband’s shoulder and they watch in comfortable silence as their daughter has her first meal in her new home.