Audio 2

“Minari, are you still awake?”

“Hmmm, what is it baby tiger?”

“Oh its nothing, babe, it’s just... I can’t quite sleep” her sleep laced voice whispered lowly to me, leaving me aching for her touch. “Come here then,” I whispered in that same low tone, snaking my arms around her tiny body and pulling her closer to me. Her head automatically found a nook in my neck, snuggling into it, while her arms were nestled closely. I rested my chin on her head, smelling her sweet strawberry shampoo. My legs curled around hers; we fit together, just like two puzzle pieces that were meant for each other. 

“Arigato, Minariiiiii,” she said, pronouncing the Japanese word as precisely as she can. 

“Aieru, baby cub,” I murmured lovingly into her hair. “What does that mean unnie?” she asked, and I swear in the darkness, I could see her eyes sparkling full of curiosity and pure adorableness. “It means goodnight,” I sleepily said, placing a kiss on her forehead. She seemed satisfied with the answer she got, and drifted back into her slumber.

 I took this time to memorize her face, every curve and flat, the way her dimple showed every once in a while when she smiled in her sleep; she is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen in my life. And with the moon shining on both of us through the open window, I fell asleep cuddling her. Just the both of us in that moonlight room, sharing dreams, what a simplistic life. 

“MINA! MINAA!” Nayeon’s annoyingly chirpy woke me up from my soulful rest. I pushed my head back into the Chaeyoung-scented pillow, hoping to recount that perfect moment in that dream I was having, before Nayeon oh-so-rudely interrupted. “Come on minariiii, we need to tell you something important,” she whined, pulling at my foot to try and drag me off the bed. “Ughhhhh,” I groaned into the pillow, pushing my head further in. “Mina, I’m being serious, the police have new found information about Chaeyoung.” I belted up straight away, hearing the name ‘Chaeyoung’.

“Ha! I told you she would listen if you said her name” teased Jungyeon and Dahyun, whom were both peering and giggling at the door. Both Nayeon and I shot them the same exasperated glare, and she even jokingly raised her arm, as if she was threatening to hit them, and they were off. I laughed at the hilarious sight in front of me, but can’t help but feel empty. It should have been Chaeyoung that was joking around with Jungyeon instead of Dahyun, it should have been Chaeyoung shouting at me in the morning to wake me up at god knows what time, it should have been Chaeyoung with Dahyun, the two most immature maknaes, teasing and giggling from outside the door. But where was she?

I wiped my eyes before anymore tears could fall, packing my things, I followed Nayeon out the door. “Apparently, some stranger dropped a tip as to where Chaeyoung could be, but we’re not too sure so the police invited us to check it out, since we were the members... I mean ex-members of her,” she blurted out, leading me and the rest of Twice (well Twice minus Chaeyoung) into the ominous black limousine.

The moment I entered the limousine, I plugged in my headphones and tapped straight to the chat between Chaeyoung and I, scrolling back up to listen to the second pre-recorded audio she sent me. 

“Hello my penguuu, how have you been?” she cheerfully said, lighting up my gloomy mood once again with her voice. “Great, but I wish you were here with me, but I suppose I won’t even be in this fancy limousine if you were here,” I said into the mic of my earphones, as if she could hear me talk. Her laughter in the audio clip was perfectly timed, she laughed when I paused, her joyful laughter pressed me to continue. “I miss you a lot you know Chaeyoung, I really really miss you,” I spoke softly this time, head leaning against the window, zoning out from reality. Jihyo or Nayeon were probably talking to the rest of the members but I listened to nothing they said and continued to play the recording.

“I hope you’ve been doing well, Minari, because I haven’t been up to the weather so much lately,” she continued, as I slowly shake my head, “Well, hopefully a field trip would make both of us feel better!” she tried to imitate the best optimistic voice possible, but after spending 2 years with a person, you can tell when they’re lying. “About, right now, you should be approaching somewhere really special to us. I’ll leave you alone for a while to wonder around,” and with that her voice was cut off, but the clip was still playing.

I got out of the limousine and strayed away from the other members. This place brought back many feelings of young love, naiveness and the process of falling. This bridge, was where Chaeyoung and I had our first ever date. 

“Ready? In 3seconds, open your eyes. 3...2...1,” she squealed, ripping the blindfold off. I gasped at the view: we were standing on an old, run down stone bridge, overlooking the placid water. However, in the water, millions and millions of floating candles were placed; it was like the stars shone in the river! I could feel the warmth radiating from the candles, surrounding me in an atmosphere of safety and homeliness. I never felt more secure, with Chaeyoung near my side. 

“Chaeyoung! Did you do this just for me?” I exclaimed, still mesmerized by the magnificent beauty in front of my eyes. All she did, was show her dimpled smile, and stood next to me. “You know, I picked this bridge and river for a reason,” she said, her voice hinting deep intellectualism. “No one ever comes to this bridge, it isn’t famous, but it’s beautiful, it’s sacred, and most of all, it’s hidden,” she paused to look over the candles, her eyes reflecting over the light. “And I think, that’s what our relationship is supposed to be, you know,” she took a glance at me, showing her cute half smile again, “we aren’t supposed to be dating, but yet we are; love finds itself in the most inconvenient of places, and I think that’s what makes us special.” 

I was too dumb folded by her wise words that I could do nothing but nod my head, and I’m glad I did, because she laughed, her perfect, joyful laugh, and that ended our evening exactly the way it should have. 

There were tears in my eyes once again as I recount all the memories I had here with Chaeyoung; when we snuck out of a practice session together just to loiter around this bridge, when we were both so tired of fighting each other, we would always make up at this bridge, and when we were just in need of isolation, this bridge was our safe harbor. ‘But not anymore,’ I thought bitterly, ‘now, it’s just my safe harbor.’

“Hello, my penguu! Did you miss me? I hope you are at the bridge or this audio clip would have some really weird content to you,” she joked. “Anyways, do you remember this bridge?” I nod my head vigorously, “ahhh, our first date. How romantic isn’t it. I personally liked it more with the floating candles and everything,” she sighed, “but I guess not everything goes your way does it now, unnie?” “Especially not with the litter monitor breathing down on your neck every time he sees you pass by!” she laughed, and I immediately thought back to when she was literally (litter-ally aahahhahahaha) hunted down by those environment hippies for putting ‘fire hazards’ in water. 

A smile creeped to my face, as I remember how she ran into the dorm and slammed the door before those hippies could decapitate her for ‘littering’. However, before I was able to talk back into the microphone, she started talking once again. 

“You know,” she said, more solemnly than ever, “when we said this bridge was our comfort zone, I was actually lying to you,” I was taken aback, but I continued listening anyways. “Unnie, this bridge means little to nothing to me. It isn’t my comfort zone. YOU are my comfort zone. You are my safety harbor, my little bubble of coziness. This bridge did not fight my boredom, nor my exhaustion, nor my irritation. It was you, my penguu, it was always you, and I thank you for that.” 

The clip ended right there, with tears (oh wow she cries a lot) streaming down my face. I knew my chaeng could get deep and emotional, but I didn’t expect her to be this in touch with her feelings. Her words turned my world upside down, I did know that she loved me and all, but this much? I must have seriously underestimated her. 

I stood, peering over the edge like how Chaeyoung and I did, looking at the imaginary floating candles, waiting.