final words

　

i was at home one day after a long day in school. i was sat on my bed when i got a message on my phone, i read the message and it was my mum having a go at me once again. i ignored it and thought to myslelf, why am i so scared of dying? we all die at one point right? maybe its because im scared of what is on the other side? i dont know, all i knew was that i wanted to leave and if i did it would be now.

　

i got off my bed and grabbed some rope to tie a noose and then placed it on the ceiling and then stood on a chair. I had wrote letters before hand.

　

To Mum and Dad

Hey... if you are reading this then it means i have decided to take my own life. i dont want you to grieve for me because i wasnt and am still not worth anything. i'm sorry for all the pain i have caused you but you wont have to feel anymore of that. i'm not writing this to make you feel bad but this is how i truely feel. I love you guys so much and please dont forget that.

　

i love you so much but now its time to say goodbye... we will meet again someday but for now just make it through the night and hug your pillow tighter. xxx

　

To Belle

Hey B! i know you possilby dont have a clue what has happened to me or if you do, you dont understand why i done it. i want you to know that i love you so much and im sorry i cant be by you leading you the right way in life but i will be watching from above.

i love you so much, goodbye xxx

　

im sorry to all of my friends because even though you all probably cared about me i didnt see it, i couldnt get it through my head no matter how much i tried. i will be watching over all of you but i wouldnt like you to be in pain because of me.

　

i stood up on the chair and looked out the window and thought to myself i wont be here soon and ill be up in the sky. i took one foot of the chair which led to me loosing balance and falling, there it was, i was dead.

　

My parents came home with Belle and shouted up to me, they started to worry and came upstairs after i never replied, as i always reply. i was watching over them. my mum came running into my room and froze so did belle after she had shouted my dad. he ran up the stairs and cried when he saw me he took me down from the rope and placed me on my bed, i realsied now that they did actually care about me even though they didnt show it. i also realised, i couldnt go back.

 

 

notes------

you keep saying you want to leave after everything which has happened in the past and your tired of what happens

　

you chose what u want to kill yourself

　

your mum and dad pissed you off which has completetly triggered you

　

no one is home and its the best time to do this.

　

no one will know.... you thought to yourself

　

do the whole scene of killing yourself.... write a letter.... do a video to everyone

　

apolagise to your friends for leaving... apolagise to yourself and siblings

　

you will seen them soon and tell them to stay strong

　

you mouth goodbye and get ready to jump as you do, you turn of the camera so it isnt too painful for everyone

　

you are now floating in the air and the room is in silence. theres no going back

　

the pain is all gone but only for you

　

how is your family going to react

　

you ended your life because u liked someone and they didnt like u back

　

parents come home but you dont answer and they open the door and screams at the sight she is seeing little sibling sees you and begs you to wake up dad comes up the stairs and gets you down and tries to help you while full of tears... he then goes into shock. after he laid you down on the bed... you are watching over them and its hurting you more than you thought because you realise they finally care about you.... but its too late now.... theres nothing that you can do. everyone is frozen still and your sister is lying beside you crying into your chest. your dad calls 999 and explains what has happened. little sister jumps into dads arms.. she knows your dead and your not coming back. cops arrive and push everyone out take you out on stretcher and you go out of the house. 2 weeks (link to depression song) everyone went back into your room the rope is still there and everything is the same as it was. they clean up.