Chapter 11: Home

Jung Eunji groaned quietly as morning sunshine tickled her closed eyes, slowly chased away the dream of her favorite little boy. They were playing with beach sand this time, building a castle together. He looked so excited with one hand holding a small red shovel and another one was full of sand. Their castle was almost done when she felt the sun seemed to shine too bright. Soon later everything faded into dazzling white, she inhaled deep as her consciousness returned.

The curtain on the room’s glass wall greeted her lazy gaze, but the sunshine was too bright for her morning eyes that she immediately closed it again and turned around slowly. The swift seemed to affect a grip on her waist which she slowly realized. It tightened and brought her body closer to familiar warmth.

Her eyes opened up again.

“Can we … stay together?”

Mortification hit her as she remembered her own line last night, inviting him. She didn’t know why she did that, but this morning she might have her answer. After having problem with sleep for weeks she realized she needed a proper one, and he could make her sleep, she reasoned now. It’s for her, and for him, for her favorite little boy. She decided she’ll do whatever cost she had to pay, including having to wake up with embarrassing blush on her cheeks just like right now.

Their face was so close that his soundless breath easily forehead, awakening a familiar heat teasing her face. His lips were an inch away from the bridge of her nose. Eunji knew she should remain in her position if she didn’t want those lips to greet her skin, her heart was not ready for a new skinship more than this, although if she’s being honest, those lips were not completely new to her. The tip of her nose though was almost touching his chin, she surely had difficulty in controlling her breath, trying her best to not making unnecessary motion, afraid that any contact with him would wake him up.

Her gaze locked up with the tip of his lips, it curled in a thin smile, she wondered what dream he’s having right now.

I have to leave first, she believed. Things would surely turn awkward if she stayed waiting for him, and Eunji didn’t want it. Being so careful, she tried to remove his hand from her waist, and to her failure, he sighed quietly, waking up for sure. Not knowing what to do, her body froze in her position. The last time she woke up with him on bed, she wasn’t completely awake, her situation now was so different. She was 100% awake and remembered perfectly what she asked him to do last night.

“Eunji …” he called her, his voice was hoarse and its sound sent a weird sensation to her stomach. It’s still early yet she began to hate him already.

“Did you sleep well?” he muttered quietly, eyes opened up and gazed down, meeting her timid look. He smiled.

Not sure how to respond him while trying to suppress the weird feeling in her stomach, Eunji could only nod.

“Good,” he replied, “and good morning.”

“Sunbae?”

“Never better,” replied him still with his thin smile.

But soon his expression changed, “Eunji, promise me one thing,” he paused for a second, “never, ever, sleep on the floor again.”

She was not expecting this request to come but she understood that he’s worried.

“I thought I could eventually fall asleep,” she admitted, her eyes avoided his expectant reaction.

“Then, let me stay next to you again from now on, I don’t know what you mean when you said to your dad that I could make you sleep, but if that what it is, I’ll stay and make sure you can sleep every night.”

Her chest tightened, something about his word and his proposal affected her heart rhythm, it beat faster and Eunji was not comfortable with this. Something was coming, she started to have a picture of this familiar feeling. This was dangerous. She never doubted this guy’s kind intention, but Eunji began to doubt her own composure.

“We are in this together, you promised me, and I’m going to make it happen,” he said, his fingers gently brushed away some messy strands of her hair to the side.

Don’t do that!

“First, I think we should start to live together, in our own place. What do you think?”

Weird, it’s weird. The word our sounded so strange to her, she wasn’t used to refer them as one yet. It wasn’t the first time of course, but today was exceptional. It was weird, so weird, she believed, but it also felt peculiarly warm.

Back to your sense, Jung Eunji!

She closed her eyes, breathing in, and waking up.

“When Sunbae went to the meeting, I started to think that maybe we’re going to stay here, but actually I’m afraid that if we do I might trouble your parents a lot,” she confessed.

“That’s silly, they would never think like that …”

“I know but … but I like Sunbae’s plan better.”

“Hey, just because we’re not living in the same house, do not assume mother will let you do anything just by yourself,” the male chuckled knowing well what on her mind.

“What?”

“She would likely to disagree, and even if she agrees she would definitely bargain, hmm, something like… she probably will come almost everyday just to make sure you eat healthy food and take your vitamin. Yeah, definitely something like that,” he continued, a chuckle followed.

Eunji was confused, was still not used over the comfortable warmth that tingled her stomach. She only met his family yesterday, she would not dare to imagine herself to get such affection, especially with the tangled fate they suddenly had.

“So, are you okay if we move this weekend?”

His voice brought her attention back to their plan. Eunji looked up and met with his tender smile. For uncertain reason his hand hadn’t left her head, it kept playing with her hair. She knew something was happening, but Eunji didn’t want to name it, not now.

So, with warmed cheeks she nodded.

“Okay, good.” He smiled slightly wider, his cheekbones rose. “Second, we have to … go out,” he carefully said as he waited for her reaction.

“We can’t hide forever,” Gong Yoo continued, trying to pick a good phrasing to not scare her. “The company suggested us to go out instead, the sooner the better, we have to let the people know about us. What do you think?”

Her expression changed immediately, he expected it already, but he waited.

Going out when she’s supposed to be forgotten was not easy to picture. The moment she decided to pick her baby over her career, she was ready to throw everything away for the sake of it. But she just realized now, that staying with this guy required her to be exposed again. Suddenly she felt uncomfortable twitch in her stomach.

Hypocrite!

Betrayal!

Get lost!

Sl*t!

Go die!

Suddenly her chest began to tighten again, but the feeling was different. Fear started to consume her mind, Eunji could feel her fingers sweating, it’s trembling, she saw. Slowly she had difficulty in breathing. Inhale, exhale, she tried to tell herself how to breathe. The air felt heavy and she didn’t know how to control her own lung now.

“Hey, it’s okay, it’s okay,” this time Gong Yoo brought his palm to her cheek, trying to shoo away the terrible pictures inside her head. Gently he brought her to his chest, “It’s okay, Eunji, it’s okay.” He muttered on her ears as he patted her back. “Remember that I will never let anything hurt you and our boy. It’s okay… it will be fine, I promise you.”

It took her couple of minutes to get rid of those horrible pictures out her mind and Gong Yoo was pretty much understanding, he waited patiently, his grip on her shoulder was tightened but not hurting. Her breath was slowing down as time flew, he initiated to check on her, his smile lingered, “It’s okay, it’s fine, look at me, Eunji,” he said kindly, and Eunji replied, tears escaped her eyes as she matched his eyes.

“We have plan,” Gong Yoo explained as he gently wiped her tears away, “it’s all well planned." He continued, his voice was much softened. "We don’t have to do it immediately right now, we’ll do it when you’re ready. But first," he paused for good two seconds as he watched her with a tender gaze "... I want you to consider it. Can you do that?”

She closed her eyes again, trying to calm herself, breathing in. When she looked up at him, that weird feeling burst again, and how unfair it was in which every time she felt vulnerable she would immediately feel safe just by looking at that gaze. Despite she knew how powerless she was, that gaze, that voice was full of assurance, and it’s utterly comforting. How she wished she could do more for him.

Her head nodded quietly.

“Thank you,” he remarked with a small smile. “I’ll explain the detail once we’re in our own home,” Gong Yoo continued.

He didn’t realize what his last word had affected her though. Our home. Not only the word our still felt peculiar to her, home felt so strange to her.

It took her a moment to realize that she needed to snap back to her sense. This feeling or whatever she felt in her stomach was not supposed to be there. Eunji did not have time to deal with another complicated issue. She needed to focus on their current problem, she should not mess with her feeling.

*

For the last five days their routine always started with him going out for either a meeting or preparing for the weekend. He usually returned home in the evening, making sure that he always had dinner with her and his parents. And when they’re ready to bed, Gong Yoo always shared with her what he did the whole day. He had promised himself that he would not leave her out of the plan, he would ask her opinion on some things.

At first Eunji disliked the thought of staying at home while doing nothing helpful, but his mother seemed to understand her feeling despite it wasn’t said. Thus, she sometimes brought her out for dinner shopping, or just asked Eunji to join her in the garden. Gong Yoo’s parents loved plants, mother mentioned couple of times how gardening made her feel healthier.

Not only that, they also went to a doctor one time, she’s mother’s friend, they earned congratulation on their first visit rather than a questioning look. She mentioned that Eunji needed to eat more, her weight was a slightly under normal. The baby was healthy but even so, she told her how crucial the first trimester and pointed out again she needed to eat more. Mother was quite protective that time, that she herself promised to make sure her daughter would eat more.

It brought her a small smile, remembering her partner mentioned about mother might be coming to their house everyday just to make sure she eat properly.

Her own parents called almost everyday, especially mom. And being the good daughter she always was, Eunji would tell everything she did the day, knowing well by doing that would assure her mother how she’s welcomed and treated with kindness and warmth.

His parents also had some short greeting through phone one time, and promising to greet them properly when they met. Mother especially talked the longest, telling them how thankful she was that Eunji would become part of their family. Eunji cried silently next to her listening to his mother’s kind talk, her hand was locked with the mother’s hand for the entire phone talk.

Sometimes Gong Yoo would also greet them when he’s around. Mom was mostly the one talking with him though, dad would just talk shortly like asking how he was doing and then left the phone to mom. It wasn’t easy to ignore the awkwardness between them, Gong Yoo knew he had to wait, it’s understandable. This was why as soon as he talked to Eunji about their moving out plan he immediately let her patents know, he asked them also for their opinion and made sure that they knew well about this plan, as part of his promise to her father.

Eunji’s father was not too fond with the idea of them living together before the legal process. It brought silence between them. Legal process, of course. The parents asked when they would meet to decide on the date, the sooner the better, dad strongly mentioned. They should not delay it any longer, added dad. His father agreed with it, they should meet soon to talk about this, mentioning that despite his company might have plan but family meeting should be handled by them personally. This was what should be done, father exclaimed patiently.

After the serious talk, the parents decided to meet this weekend, postponing the moving out date. Gong Yoo left home early in the morning to inform his company about this meeting and discuss about their future plan.

“I agree with your parents, the sooner the better,” his CEO said.

On his seat, Gong Yoo only nodded, fidgeting.

“We agreed on private wedding, as planned, we will block all media before you guys ready to come out,” one of his lawyers mentioned.

“Just let us know as soon as it’s decided, we will plan the wedding perfectly,” added his CEO.

Again, he only nodded.

Looking at the empty wall in front of him, his mind was travelling somewhere else. Gong Yoo forgot something really crucial. And he couldn’t lie how terrible he’s feeling right now. The meeting was short due to him being uncomfortable and kept fidgeting the whole time. His team agreed to finish it earlier and would wait until the family meeting. He might not tell them, but they knew he’s not in full focus right now.

After bidding them a goodbye, he was ready to leave the room but his CEO stopped him, telling him to follow him to his room.

“It just arrived this morning, you’re lucky, the time is just perfect,” the older said, pulling out a small black velvet box from his desk. “I never doubt your choice, it’s beautiful.” He followed and earned a gratitude smile from the younger.

“Thank you, Hyung, I appreciated this, all of this,” Gong Yoo bowed slightly, his eyes