seohaeng has smears of grease on his fingertips and dry lips, cold and chapped with soju, on the night kyungho tells him he's leaving.

kyungho does it well, doesn't tell him straight up, slips it in his throat like bitter medicine with the sugar of honey soy chicken and dull soju he'd bought before this to help wash it down.

seohaeng can't say he didn't see it coming, so he presses a cold napkin to his mouth and downs the crinkly plastic cup of alcohol he'd poured for himself a while ago. it's disgustingly lukewarm when he does- he'd let it sit, waiting faithfully for this moment when he knew he'd need it most, because he'd seen this coming from a mile away, and had just pretended, with escalating desperation, that the looming abyss in the road ahead was nothing more than a smudge on the windscreen.

"you're-...you knew, right?" kyungho sounds appropriately concerned. he's not trying to hide it- he's worried about how seohaeng might take it. but seohaeng's heart doesn't have much space for gratefulness right now- in fact, he doesn't think he has one left.

"yeah," seohaeng says, voice cool and ebbing and bitter like the alcohol they're sharing. "we all did, back during worlds- it got pretty obvious."

obvious the way they saw it coming when yeujin left them, the way kyungho had held seohaeng's hand back then and promised they'd see each other again, just wait.

and seohaeng had believed him.

the midlaner's made a great many mistakes in his life- progaming possibly one of them, but this...this takes the cake.

"yeah?" kyungho's obviously unsettled. he adds quickly, as though to make it better: "wangho's planning on leaving too, i think. he’s had a load of offers."

"yeah," seohaeng says, now running the wet towel over his fingers- it's warm now, and he tosses it into the oily plastic bag with the remainder of their meal.

he knows kyungho's expecting him to tell him it's okay, he's happy for him, he wishes him all the best wherever he goes, in classic kyungho fashion- always trying to preserve the good relationships wherever he goes, a finger in every pie.

"i hope you like it there," is all seohaeng manages. kyungho breaks out into a wide smile- and seohaeng reacts to the rejection before he can feel it, instinctively leaning away when kyungho leans forward.

"not now," seohaeng's voice is heavy like thunderclouds, holding back a storm that’s threatening to break. "i'll clean up."

"hyung?" kyungho grabs his shirt. there's a hint of panic in that action, one that never failed to make seohaeng melt instantaneously- at least some things haven’t changed.

“why are you doing this,” seohaeng says dully. the wind is freezing against his face at this hour, and it makes his voice waver a little.

“we’ll still see each other, won’t we?” kyungho looks reproachful, and warm enough in the earmuffs seohaeng had lent him when he’d heard his teeth chattering just now. “people change teams all the time. it’s about time we moved on, don’t you think?”

what is it you want to see?  is what seohaeng wants to ask. what could you be looking for?

what is it you’re moving on from?

but he doesn’t.

“yeah. thanks," he says reflexively instead, and kyungho’s grip softens when he forces a smile. one which the other boy returns with one of his own, glad to see that things are good and right between them, and he can leave him in pieces with peace of mind. “for everything.”

“i’ll miss you,” kyungho draws him in for a hug. he’s not lying, seohaeng knows that- just won’t miss him enough not to leave, that’s all.

so seohaeng smiles and embraces the brunt of the shrapnel from the impact of kyungho’s leave, and at the back of his mind, wonders if the offers he’d turned down so confidently during worlds this year will take him now.

a/n: long live super kt, or something, i guess.